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Nimeachana na hawara nachanganyikiwa

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by miss nora, Jun 6, 2011.

  1. miss nora

    miss nora Member

    #1
    Jun 6, 2011
    Joined: Mar 25, 2011
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    siyo mara ya kwanza kuomba ushauri humu mimi ni mama mwenye miaka 24 nina mtoto wa mwaka na nusu, na ndoa yangu ina miaka mitano na nusu,ni miaka miwilli sasa mume wangu amekuwa kiwembe kutokana na kugombana mara kwa mara na mimi nikaamua nikae ninyamaze nisiendelee kumfuatilia kwani niliona tutaachana na tutamuacha mtoto wetu akiteseka,. nakumbuka ni kama miezi 2 imepita kuna kijana alionyesha kunipenda sana, huyo kijana ni mwanafunz wa chuo kikuu kimoja na yupo mwaka wa 3, na alikuwa anaishi jirani na nyumbani kwangu. kweli nikatokea kumpenda sana na tukaanzisha mahusiano bila yy kujua kwamba me ni mke wa mtu..kutokana na mume wangu kuwa mtu wa safari sana hii ilisaidia kuwa free kuongea na huyo kijana muda wowote mpaka usiku wa manane..siku moja mume wangu alirudi usiku nikaweka simu yangu silence ili akinipigia yule kijana isisikike,, lakini bahati mbaya sijui ilikuwaje mume wangu akaona mwanga wa simu yangu akaamka na kuipokea ile simu akamtukana yule kijana sana na akamitishia kumfanya kitu kibaya,,baada ya pale nikaenda kwa yule kijana tukakaa nikamwambia ukweli, aliumia sana mpaka akalia na akaniambia kuwa hakuwahi kufikiria kutembea na mke wa mtu..nikambembeleza yakaisha. tangu hapo ni wiki 3 sasa nikawa namuona huyu kijana hana amani na mimi kabisa na nikahisi some thing wrong,jana nikamwambia naomba uwe huru endelea na maisha yako, akanijibu tangu amegundua nina mume hana amani hata kidogo na ameshindwa kuniacha kwani alishanipenda sana.nikamwambia basi tuachane nisije kukuaribia malengo na maisha yako.tukakubaliana kuwa kaka na dada,, kiukweli huyu kijana bado nampenda sana na kiukweli ni kwamba mume wangu nilishamuigno na sina hamu nae wala furaha kutokana na tabia yake ya kubadilisha wanawake.. nafikiria sasa nifanyaje kwani kijana niliyekuwa nadhani amekuwa furaha ya maisha yangu ndo hivyo tena nimeachana nae nawezaje kuishi bila kupenda.. ?? msinishauri kuwa nilikosea kwani niliteseka sana kumvumilia huyu mume wangu mpaka mwisho ndo na mm nikatoka nje ya ndoa kutafuta pumziko. naomba ushauri wenu wadau Topic by:Mama K Date: 2011-06-06
     
  2. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Jun 6, 2011
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    Sasa kama mume humpendi wala humtaki wa nini unabaki nae?!Kama umeona hamna kitakachobadilika kaanze maisha yako upya mlee kila mmoja akiwa kwake!
     
  3. pauline

    pauline JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Jun 6, 2011
    Joined: Dec 26, 2010
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    he pole shosti,
    mie naona huyo baba kuna kitu anakupa labda kiuchumi hujiwezi ndio maana hufikirii kumuacha.....
    tafuta means za kujikomboa kiuchumi halafu umuache,uendelee na huyo wa chuo kikuuu....
    usiwe na tamaa pia,inawezekana huyo wa chou kikuu asiwe ana uwezo wa kukupa kila unachotaka ila anaweza kukupa furaha...sasa ujudgge mwenyewe furaha au mali.....
    hata hivyo mie siamini ni mapenzi ya kweli wewe na huyo wa chuo kikuuu.....naona kwa vile ulikuwa desperate na ndoa yako,ukapata pa kukimbilia...chunguza tena mapenzi yake kwako kabla hujabwaga manyanga usije ukawa unavuka mkojo unakanyaga mavi........
     
  4. pauline

    pauline JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Jun 6, 2011
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    vidumu oyeeeeeeeeeeeeee,kwani huwezi kuwakeeep wote wawili?mbona wengine wanaweza?lol:confused2::whistle:
     
  5. Vin Diesel

    Vin Diesel JF Gold Member

    #5
    Jun 6, 2011
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    kupanga ni kuchagua.
     
  6. jockey emmanuel

    jockey emmanuel JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Jun 6, 2011
    Joined: Mar 23, 2011
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    wat did u promise in front of the church?uliahidi kuwa mtavumiliana kwenye shida na raha sio?mi ni K,so ntakushauri kama mwanao...kwanza,omba MUNGU ili uondoe mawazo hasi juu ya mume wako.pili,unajua siri ya mume kukupenda zaidi ni jinsi unavyo mtek care shosti,hivi huoni kuwa bado anakupenda ndo mana akamfoka huyo kijana...ongeza mahaba bibie,hao wajanja anawachukua coz of that....ucmchoke,mpende zaid,mpe zawad,mambo yetu ya chumbani ongeza shosti,chakula badilisha....kuwa mpole hata akipanda kidgkidg utaona anashuka mwenyewe,ucache kumpa haki ya ndoa kwa moyo wote....tatu,msahau huyo kijana na omba MUNGU akusamehe kwa kutoka nje ya ndoa...shetani alikuwa anakudanganya ili uvunje ndoa yako,naamuru ASHINDWE!mvumilie mume wako,tabu ztakwisha cku moja...hiyo tabia ilikuwa na mwanzo kwahiyo lazma iwe na mwisho....cku moja atabadilika tu....:A S 100:
     
  7. pangalashaba

    pangalashaba JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Jun 6, 2011
    Joined: Jan 10, 2011
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    duuuuuuh!!!! kumbe uko dom? pole sana dadaangu,vumilia tu ndo maisha yalivyo.. kwa hiyo hicho kident ndo umekolea nacho,na je ni kamwenyeji ka dom au? nauliza hivyo kwa sababu kama ni 3rd yr ina maana karibu kanamaliza skul then kanasepa. utatafuta kident kingine tena au?
     
  8. S

    Sammc Member

    #8
    Jun 6, 2011
    Joined: May 24, 2011
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    Pole mdada cha msingi fanya utafiti kwa kina kuhusu huyo wa chuo hata kama ulikuwa naye kwani siku hizi na balaa na kama mume wako mapenzi yamepungua hata ufanyie jema lolote atakuona kama hufai kwake kwani asilimia kubwa wanaume hawafai hata kidogo pole mwaya
     
  9. Bishanga

    Bishanga JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Jun 6, 2011
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    Penye red hapo Mkuu,asije akabadilika wakati tayari anafungwa nepi na drip mkono wa kulia na kushoto,AIDS kills!
     
  10. Bishanga

    Bishanga JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Jun 6, 2011
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    Wanaume tuna shida jamani,embu oneni dongo hilo kwenye red hapo.
     
  11. kisukari

    kisukari JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Jun 6, 2011
    Joined: Jul 16, 2010
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    jamani hivi m.me mzinzi huwa anabadilika?mimi siamini hicho kitu,kama kubadilika mpaka yamkute ndio hubadilika.ila hata umuwekee vikao ni ngumu au labda aamue mwenyewe tu.kikubwa utaambiwa vumilia,muombe mungu kuna mawili uvumilie uletewe ukimwi ndani ya nyumba,au uvumilie uishi maisha ya huzuni kila siku.tangu sister wangu,tulimzika kwa ukimwi kwa kuambiwa neno la vumilia,muombe mungu.{kwa upande wangu simvumilii m.me mzinzi}bora niwe sina mtu niwe lonely maisha kuliko kuvumilia.sister jitahidi kujikomboa kimaisha.wewe ndio unaishi nae,unajua mazuri na mabaya yake.unavyoamua,amua kwa ajili ya mtoto wako na usiamue kwa kuiridhisha jamii.kwa miaka yako,bado mdogo,
     
  12. Kaka Mpendwa

    Kaka Mpendwa JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Jun 6, 2011
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    Lizzy, ni ushauri mzuri, lakini huyu dada yupo kwenye ndoa, na sio vizuri ku-solve tatizo kwa kukimbia, kwani hadi wanaoana alikuwa hajui kuwa anampenda?

    Hapo kwenye RED ndio ukweli..

    Dada, Mama K, asante kwa kutuomba na sisi tukushauri ufanye nini...

    Kikubwa ninachokiona mapenzi na huyo mwanafunzi yajengwa katika misingi ya ngono..na mara nyingi ngono ya uwizi inaonekana ni tamu, lakini madhara yake ni makubwa.
    Tayari umefanya vyema kumshauri huyo kijana atafute maisha mengine; na sioni sababu ya wewe kuendelea kuwa naye wakati umeshajua nini kinaendelea.

    Nakushauri utafute muda ukae na mumeo muongee yanayowasibu..Kama umekuwa na ushahidi wa kutosha kwa mumeo kuwa anatoka nje ya ndoa, kwanini usiyapeleke kwa wazazi au washenga wenu?

    Hapa unasema;

    Umefanya kosa, ndo maana hata moyo wako unakusuta..na huwezi kulipiza baya juu ya baya, na ikanonekana ulifanya haki. Kosa ni kosa tu.

    Mie ninaona wewe bado ni msichana mdogo, 24, na maamuzi unayoyafanya ni ya kitoto. Angalia sana, usije ukapoteza ndoa yako kwa sababu tu ya huyo mwanafunzi. Hapa unasema mume wako yuko busy,ni mtu wa safari, una hakika gani kwamba amekuwa ni mtu kutoka nje??..

    Hakuna ndoa iliyokamilika dada, zote zina shida kuliko..na unayofurahia mapenzi ya huyo kijana kwa sababu tu hakuna majukumu mengine mazito kama huyo kijana kutafuta chakula, kulea mtoto, yaani kwa kifupi, kinachowakutanisha nyie ni ngono tu..

    Sasa kama unataka kuona maisha machungu, achana na huyo mume wako, na ukaishi na huyo kijana, halafu ndo utajua nini maana ya majukumu.. Inaonesha wewe ni mama ya nyumbani, sidhani kama mumeo hakupi matunzo mengine. Sina mengi, ila achana na huyo kijana kama ulivyoamua na uanze kujenga ndoa yako upya. Simama mwanamke..simamia ndoa yako.
     
  13. itnojec

    itnojec JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Jun 6, 2011
    Joined: Mar 31, 2011
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    wanawake na mambo ya vidumu.....
    kwanza ulifanya makosa makubwa kwa kutomwambia kijana wa watu kuwa wewe ni mke wa mtu, na hili ndo limemfanya aumie sana.
    nyie ndo mnaowafanya watu wawe hawathamini penz na wawe wagumu kupenda tena..hapo matokeo yake ni huyo kijana kuwa player na kuona wanawake wote kuwa wapo kama wewe wanaotaka kumtumia kupunguza stress zao tu.

    pili, kama mmeshindana na mumeo siyo lazma muishi kama mme na mke huku moyoni huna furaha wala amani (machoni unacheka lakini moyoni unamwaga chozi). Mi nadhani, achana na mumeo ambaye unamuona wa baridi sana na utafte kidume mwingine.

    ANGALIZO: Katika tafta tafta yako angalia usijeangukia kwa mtu ambaye alishawah kufanyiwa kama ulivyomfanyia kijana wa watu, utaona dunia chungu. lazma atakutenda tuu.
     
  14. Kobello

    Kobello JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Jun 6, 2011
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    My heart goes to the kid.....It's sickening but you got to do what you got to do!
     
  15. Kigogo

    Kigogo JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Jun 6, 2011
    Joined: Dec 14, 2007
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    una miaka 24 ,una mtoto wa mwaka 1 na nusu uko kwenye ndoa miaka 5 na nusu???? khaaaa....ngoja ntarudi baadaye hii kitu ngoja nifanyie utafiti kwenye google
     
  16. Kaka Mpendwa

    Kaka Mpendwa JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Jun 6, 2011
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    Kumbe hapa umekuja tuu ku-justify ulichokuwa unatafuta,..nimekumbuka post yako ya mwezi wa 3 (march)

    Kumbe kipindi kile tayari ulikuwa unatoka nje???...Mie nisingependa uvunje ndoa yako, kwa sababu wakati unaolewa ulijua kabisa historia ya huyo mume wako, na ninafikiri kilichokupeleka ni PESA yake, na sasa unayokosa mapenzi ya kwenye ndoa...

    Toka ulipobandika post yako ya Mwezi Machi, ulifanya juhudi gani kutafuta suluhu ya ndoa yako?? Na ilifikia wapi?
    Kama umeshindwa kuishi na huyo mume wako ni bora ukaombe talaka mahakamani, kuliko kuendelea kufanya mashindano ya kutoka nje..

    Na kweli ulifanya vibaya sana kumdanganya yule mwanafunzi kwa kutokumueleza mapema.. Hebu kama wewe ni mkristo, utafute ushauri wa kiroho kwanza..la sivyo mtaangamia kwa magonjwa..
     
  17. m

    menny terry Senior Member

    #17
    Jun 6, 2011
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    dada pole sana! Mwanaume mzinzi hawezi kubadilika zaidi ya yote atakuletea UKIMWI minakushauri achana na huyo mume kwani bado wewe ni mdogo kiumri na haiwezekani ndo yawe maisha yako. Kama kweli wewe unampenda huyo kaka na yeye anakupenda basi rudianeni.Ndoa ni furaha na kama ni shida basi zinaweza kuwa magonja au umaskini hapo ni muhimu kuvumilia lakini siyo uzinzi. Utakufa bure siku sio zako.
     
  18. Kaka Mpendwa

    Kaka Mpendwa JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Jun 6, 2011
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  19. S

    Sharo hiphop JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Jun 6, 2011
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    Mhhh, ila sometimes wanaume wanasabisha matatizo wao wenyewe ndani ya familia zao. Ila mimi kwa upande wangu nakushauri umwache huyo mumeo mana hutakaa ukaenjoy maisha, wewe hujazaliwa ili uteseke, kuhusu mtoto usijali kwani ushajiuliza ni watoto wangapi ambao hawaishi na wazazi wote lakini mungu anawasaidia? Ishi maisha yatakayokupa amani, usiishi kama umekataliwa na Mungu.
     
  20. Rose1980

    Rose1980 JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Jun 6, 2011
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    mhh nadhan anavumilia cz ya watoto..asi unajua tena!
     
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