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naogopa sana,..naomba msaada wakuu

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by habby, Aug 2, 2012.

  1. h

    habby Member

    #1
    Aug 2, 2012
    Joined: Apr 20, 2012
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    Am 24 na my girl 21
    Nampenda na cna mashaka juu ya mapenz yangu kwake. Nimejiuliza mara nying kikaona kiukweli nampenda mzur sana hasa tabia. Tatizo yupo serous anataka ndoa huwa tuna shindanaga kwa hoja kama nimuoe au tusubiri mara zote ananishinda mambo mengi ya msingi yametimia. Ila mi nina wasiwasi mkubwa na umri wetu labda kuna vitu inabidi tujifunze kwa kusubiri umri upite kidogo, nina hofu may be hatuijui ndoa. Am so afraid help plz ctaki kukosea kwan nampenda.
     
  2. h

    habby Member

    #2
    Aug 2, 2012
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    natanguliza shukran
     
  3. wahida

    wahida JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Aug 2, 2012
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    Apo sasa kaZi , mwambie awe na sabra kidogo ,,
     
  4. h

    habby Member

    #4
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    Anadai tusubir nin sehemu ya kuishi ipo, msosi hata yeye ana potential za kufinance so siyo risk. Nikiguna tu anadai cmpendi kama anavyo nipenda naishiwa pozi.
     
  5. Mphamvu

    Mphamvu JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Aug 2, 2012
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    21 ndio tatizo, ni umri wa moto moto, na pengine kwa kawaida za Kitanzania bado hajajua maisha katika sura yake halisi.
    Wakati mwingine ndoa ni kitu cha kuamuliwa kulingana na mazingira zaidi kuliko mapenzi, better be careful.
     
  6. Asulo

    Asulo JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Aug 2, 2012
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    Mdogo wangu habby napenda nikushauri kwamba kama wewe mwenyewe unahisi haupo tayari kuingia kwa ndoa muda huu ni vyema kwanza ukasubiri.
    Naomba utambue kuwa ndoa si kuhusu kula au kulala kama mwenzio anavyodai..
    Unapoingia kwenye maisha ya ndoa utaona vitu vingi vitakuwa tofauti pengine sana na unavyohisi ukiwa nje.
    Hivyo ni vema ukasubiri mpaka wewe mwenyewe moyo wako utakapoamua bila kushurutishwa kuingia kwa ndoa ndiyo utaona raha yake.
     
  7. Kilahunja

    Kilahunja JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Aug 2, 2012
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    Ndoa ngumu jaman, na kwa umri wa 24 kwa wewe mkaka ndo bado kabisaa vumilia wewe ukiwa 29 then yeye 25 hiv wote mtakua mmekua, akilazimisha sana mwambie ur nt ready to be husband 4 nw, let the time takes its time..alamsiki!
     
  8. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Aug 2, 2012
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    Nimeanza kazi at 23 na nilikuwa na akili zote, get married bwana. Hata wanaooana at 30 wanachemsha. The girl at 21 tayari anaweza tunza nyumba kama wa 27, ni utulivu wake tu. Wewe ndio wamjua, wengi wanaoana at 27 ni shule ndizo huchangia; kama mna uwezo wa kuishi mimi sioni tatizo mkipata baraja za Mungu na wazazi.
     
  9. Katavi

    Katavi Platinum Member

    #9
    Aug 2, 2012
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    Oa tu mambo mengine yatajulikana mbele ya safari.
     
  10. Scofied

    Scofied JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Aug 2, 2012
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    ndoa ndoano! Tafakari....
     
  11. m

    mkanyila Member

    #11
    Aug 2, 2012
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    Endelea maadam mnapendana msisahau kupima ngoma.
     
  12. ugolo wa bibi

    ugolo wa bibi JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Aug 2, 2012
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    Kuna mambo kadhaa ya kujiuliza unapofikia umri wa kuoa! na kwa umri wako ni muda mzuri tu wa kuingia kwenye ndoa, lakini itakulazimu sasa kuwa makini kwa huyo mtarajiwa!wanawake ni wepesi sana kuzungumzia ndoa hivyo yakupasa ujiulize je unafikili ndio chaguo sahihi kwako? je anakupenda kwakweli? au anatamani tu kuolewa! kama unafikili maswali hayo una majibu mazuri kwako basi oa! maisha ni safari! na ilikuendana na safari hiyo kunahitaji maombi kutoka Mungu!ili aibariki safari yako. maandalizi mema ya ndoa.
     
  13. King'asti

    King'asti JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Aug 2, 2012
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    Unaposema sehemu ya kukaa ipo na yeye anaweza ku-finance msosi unamaanisha nini?
    Kama hufanyi kazi, huwezi kujilipia nyumba (unless una ya urithi) na huwezi kununua chakula achana na habari ya kuoa. Kama unaishi alone na unaweza kujikimu, tualike tuje harusini. Otherwise haipendezi ukaoa ukaendelea kukaa nyumbani, its a formulae for disaster!
     
  14. ITEGAMATWI

    ITEGAMATWI JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Aug 2, 2012
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    Usikimbilie ndoa kwa shinikizo la mwenzio,ndoa ni ukurasa mpya wa maishatofauti kabisa na uliyoyazoea kuishi bwana mdogo,kama unahisi bado kidogo unahitaji kuvuta muda kuyavaa majukumu ya kifamilia nakushauri mdogo wangu basi endelea na msimamo wako huo.Mwambie ukweli wa jinsi unavyosita kuingia kwenye ndoa mwenzio na imani atakuelewa.
     
  15. kalou

    kalou JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Aug 2, 2012
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    Subiri hata 2yrs,may b itakuwa ndio kipimo bora cha mapenz yenu
     
  16. SnowBall

    SnowBall JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Aug 2, 2012
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    Ni kweli hata wanaoana wakiwa na umri wa zaidi ya mhusika i mean over 24 wanachemsha..
    But how do you see 24 kwa 21?...hawa bado ni watoto jamani..
    Akili za kufanyia kazi na akili za kutunza familia au kuendesha ndoa kwangu mimi naona kuna tofauti..
    Ndoa is like an institution ndugu zangu..please habby and your gal be mature enough before you get in..
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  17. Mtalingolo

    Mtalingolo JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Aug 2, 2012
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    Kama mtapata nafasi yakuendelea kusoma ni bora mkajiendeleza kielimu, umri wenu ni mdogo sana kuingia ktk institute ya ndoa.
     
  18. HorsePower

    HorsePower JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Aug 2, 2012
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    Yeye yuko tayari kwa ndoa na wanawake walio wengi huwa wanapenda na huwa tayari kwa ndoa wakati wote, lakini wewe je? Moyo wako uko tayari? Akili yako imeridhia? Una kijikazi cha kuja kuihumia familia yako na kutunza heshima yako kama baba mwenye nyumba? Au ndo unategemea finance za misosi toka kwake alivyotabanaisha?

    Kama majibu ni ndiyo, mi sioni tatizo, shirikisha ndg zako wa karibu na wazazi pia then jitwalie mwali ukahangaike naye! Umri si tatizo sana kama tayari wote mna upeo wa kutosha wa maisha na yeye ana mapenzi ya dhati kwako na si hamu ya kuolewa tu! Nilishawahi kuhudhuria ndoa zaidi ya moja mojawapo ikiwa ya mdogo wangu ambazo wahusika walikuwa na umri kama wenu na mpaka sasa bado zimesimama vzr.
     
  19. wehoodie

    wehoodie JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Aug 2, 2012
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    sometime kuwowa ni pale unapompata mtu sahihi kuliko suala la umri au mafanikio ya kifedha na pia kila ndoa hutokana na hali halisi ya waowanaji, kwa mf. Ukimpa mimba leo huenda ikakulazimu kuoa hata kama ana miaka 18.

    Sijui mumekaa muda gani katika hayo mahaba yenu sababu kuna kile kipindi cha mwanzo ambacho mambo hunoga kiasi mtu hutamani kukaa pamoja na huweza fanya maamuzi ya haraka sababu ya nyada unazopata hapo mwanzoni.....kama ndio hivyo nashauri ujipe muda mpaka pale graph itakapokuwa normal...na hapo mtakuwa mmeshapitia up&downs na kuona kweli mpo tayari.....

    pia kwa makisio binti hayupo shuleni au kazini katika umri huo wa miaka 21 hivyo anakuwa idle sana na kuona ideal next step ni kuolewa kujiweka busy(correct kama sio sahihi) hivyo basi mshauri kitu cha kufanya wakati huu wa rehersal ya nje ya ukumbi.....

    Mwisho watu husema maturity ya me kimasuala ya familia nk huchelewa kuliko ke namaanisha katika umri wako wa 24 bado una usela mwingi unahitaji kujiachia kutongoza huyu na yule kufanya ma-party ya full night back2back na masela wako wa mtaani/kazini kiasi kwamba ukajikuta unakuwa irresponsible father....u diggy?! Ila mwisho wa siku fanya analysis na uone kama umeridhia hakuna kinachoshidikana....maana wengine wana 28 hata mpango hawana, so sio kila mara ni suala la umri ila inabidi ku-balance na mambo mengine....
     
  20. Purple

    Purple JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Aug 2, 2012
    Joined: Feb 9, 2012
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    Uhusiano wenu ni wa muda gani?usijekuta ni mwaka tu then mnakimbilia kuoana! Jipeni mda kidogo wa kufahamiana zaidi jamani kama mnapendana sidhani kama ni tatizo mkajipa miaka miwili au mitatu mbele ndo mkaoana..
     
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