Dismiss Notice
You are browsing this site as a guest. It takes 2 minutes to CREATE AN ACCOUNT and less than 1 minute to LOGIN

Kuolewa SIO bahati...USIBAHATISHE!

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Lizzy, Jan 20, 2012.

  1. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: May 25, 2009
    Messages: 22,194
    Likes Received: 122
    Trophy Points: 160
    Hua nashangazwa sana na kauli isemayo "kuolewa ni bahati" toka kwa wanaume na hata wanawake. Kauli hii hua inatoka kwa watu wanaoamini kwamba kwa kuolewa, mwanamke anakua amefanyiwa FAVOUR, AMESAIDIWA au AMEPEWA ZAWADI kana kwamba mwanamke pekee ndie anaefaidika na hiyo ndoa. Na hiyo bahati yenyewe inayotokana na kuolewa huko sio kupata mume ambae anastahili kuitwa mume bali ni kupata mahali pa kulala, chakula na mavazi. Wengine hua wanafika mbali kiasi cha kuwauliza wenzi wao moja kwa moja "unalalamika nini wakati unakula, unalala na unavaa vizuri?" pale mwanamke anapoonyesha kutoridhisha na namna mahusiano yao ndani ndoa yanavyoenda mf. mume kutokua mwaminifu, kutokuwepo nyumbani muda wa kutosha, kulewa sana, kumdharau mkewe n.k .

    Ina maana wanawake wanaolewa ili wale, walale na wavae? Walipokua kwa wazazi wao au wakijitegemea waliishi bila kula, kuvaa na kulala ndani ya nyumba?

    Kinachonisikitisha ni kuwa baadhi ya wanawake wanaunga mkono mawazo haya. Wanakubali kuchukuliwa kama watu wanaopewa msaada kwa kuolewa.

    Binafsi siamini wala sioni ni kwa namna gani "kuolewa ni bahati". Kwangu mimi bahati ipo kwenye kumpata mtu ambae anaelewa nini maana ya ndoa na kuiheshimu ndoa yake, anaempenda mwenzi wake, anaemheshimu mwenzi wake pamoja na mawazo yake, anaemsikiliza mwenzake, anaejielewa na kujitahidi kumwelewa mwenzake, aliye tayari kujitoa kwa mwenzake, anaejua na kutimiza majukumu yake, anaejitahidi kumfurahisha mwenzake kwa maneno na matendo. Vivo hivyo kwa wanaume. . . . wenye bahati sio waliooa bali ni waliooa wanawake wenye sifa nilizotanguliza hapo juu.

    Kuoa/kuolewa sio bahati hivyo usibahatishe.
     
  2. Freema Agyeman

    Freema Agyeman JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: Mar 3, 2011
    Messages: 2,802
    Likes Received: 782
    Trophy Points: 280
    Kuolewa si bahati, bahati ni kupata mume - a real husband.

    Namaanisha, unaweza kuolewa na king'asti, play boy, mlevi, teja, abuser...
     
  3. Maundumula

    Maundumula JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: Nov 4, 2010
    Messages: 7,038
    Likes Received: 24
    Trophy Points: 135
    Freeman,

    Mwanaume anaweza akawa yeyote kati ya uliowataja lakini akawa anakupenda kwa dhati.
     
  4. Annael

    Annael JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: Sep 26, 2011
    Messages: 6,134
    Likes Received: 1,989
    Trophy Points: 280
    Unasema kweli. Lakini tatizo la wanawake walio wengi hawataki kujishughulisha kama wanaume wanavyo jishughulisha.
    Ndio maana watu kama hao huwa wanauza miili yao. na wakipata mwanaume japo wa kuwafanya wale WANAONA BAHATI.
    Lakini kwa mwanamke mwenye fikra komavu hawezi kuona kuwa kuolewa ni bahati.
     
  5. M

    MUMY A JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: Jan 10, 2012
    Messages: 234
    Likes Received: 0
    Trophy Points: 0
    lizzy hapo umenena.......
     
  6. fazaa

    fazaa JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: May 20, 2009
    Messages: 2,986
    Likes Received: 8
    Trophy Points: 0
    Kazi kweli kweli.

    Mtoa mada anasema; Kuolewa haoni kama ni bahati, afu pale pale anasema bahati ipo kama umepata mtu ambae anaelewa nini mana ya ndoa.


     
  7. Annael

    Annael JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: Sep 26, 2011
    Messages: 6,134
    Likes Received: 1,989
    Trophy Points: 280
    Hapo penye red panaonesha kuwa kuolewa ni bahati. Mengine nimekubali lakini umejipinga tena mwenyewe na kukubali kuolewa ni bahati
     
  8. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: May 25, 2009
    Messages: 22,194
    Likes Received: 122
    Trophy Points: 160
    Na wanaume wanaosema hivyo je?
     
  9. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: May 25, 2009
    Messages: 22,194
    Likes Received: 122
    Trophy Points: 160
    Jaribu kuwa muelewa, nilichosema ni kwamba kitendo cha kuolewa tu pekee(na mtu yeyote yule) sio bahati, bahati ipo kwenye kumpata mtu ambae anaelewa maana ya mahusiano yake (mwenye heshima, kujali, mwaminifu n.k).
     
  10. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: May 25, 2009
    Messages: 22,194
    Likes Received: 122
    Trophy Points: 160
    Haya!!!!
     
  11. Freema Agyeman

    Freema Agyeman JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: Mar 3, 2011
    Messages: 2,802
    Likes Received: 782
    Trophy Points: 280
    sidhani kwani attention yake itakuwa huko... atanispoil saa ngapi wakati muda mwingi atakuwa nawaza mengine kama hataniabuse?

    Mume anatakiwa awe na akili timamu 24/7, so mlevi na teja wanahusika hapa. Mume anatakiwa aniwaze 24/7, hapa malaya anahusika. Mume anatakiwa a provide, hapa king'asti anahusika. Mume anatakiwa tushauriane na tukosoane kama watu wazima na sio kupelekesha mke kama mtoto au gari bovu, hapa abuser anahusika.

    Ama kweli kuolewa rahisi ila kupata mume kazi.
     
  12. s

    sawabho JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: Feb 25, 2011
    Messages: 4,121
    Likes Received: 484
    Trophy Points: 180
    Huo msemo watu wengine wanautumia vibaya, lakini ukweli ni kwamba ....neno kuolewa/kuoa ni bahati.....halimaanishi kuwa mtu huyu amepata bahati ya kuolewa kwa maana ya kupata mtu wa kumsaidia,.... bali mtu wa kusaidiana naye katika mipango ya maisha. Nasema hivi, kwa sababu baadhi ya wanawake wanaolewa tayari wakiwa wanajiweza kiuchumi na kwa mantiki hii anapata mwenza wa kusaidiana katika maisha na sio mtu wa kumtoa kimaisha. Ndio maana kuna msemo mwingine unaosema.....kuzaliwa na kufa ni lazima, ila kuoa/kuolewa sio lazima kwa maana kwamba mtu anaweza kuishi hata kama hajaoa/kuolewa. Waliopata bahati ya kuoa/kuolewa ni wale waliopata wenza wanaoweza kukaa pamoja na kupanga maisha pamoja na tabia zao zinaendana. Kwa wale wanandoa ambao ni kero kwa wenzao, watambue kuwa hawajapata bahati ya kuoa/kuolewa.
     
  13. kalipeters

    kalipeters Member

    #13
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: Jun 2, 2011
    Messages: 16
    Likes Received: 0
    Trophy Points: 0
    with a gud husby una the greatest bahati
     
  14. Annael

    Annael JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: Sep 26, 2011
    Messages: 6,134
    Likes Received: 1,989
    Trophy Points: 280
    Hao watakuwa watoto wa mama!!!
     
  15. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: May 25, 2009
    Messages: 22,194
    Likes Received: 122
    Trophy Points: 160
    You can say that AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN.
     
  16. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: May 25, 2009
    Messages: 22,194
    Likes Received: 122
    Trophy Points: 160
    Kuwa mtoto wa mama na kuona kua kuoa/olewa ni bahati kunahusiana vipi?
     
  17. Husninyo

    Husninyo JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: Oct 24, 2010
    Messages: 23,718
    Likes Received: 396
    Trophy Points: 180
    Kuolewa maamuzi.
     
  18. isamilo1982

    isamilo1982 Member

    #18
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: Jan 17, 2012
    Messages: 55
    Likes Received: 0
    Trophy Points: 0
    nikweli usemayo,lakini tatizo la vijana wengi wasasa hawaangalii sifa za msingi pindi wanapotafuta mwenzi pamoja nakwamba c bahati lakini na hayo yanachangia kwa ndoa nyingi kutodumu.
     
  19. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: May 25, 2009
    Messages: 22,194
    Likes Received: 122
    Trophy Points: 160
    Kukurupuka ndio kosa kubwa ambalo mtu anaweza kufanya kwenye haya mambo. Ukikosea hatua tu imekula kwako.
     
  20. MkimbizwaMbio

    MkimbizwaMbio JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Jan 20, 2012
    Joined: Nov 16, 2010
    Messages: 872
    Likes Received: 3
    Trophy Points: 0
    Tatizo nyie wanawake good husband ni yule mwenye pesa. Ingekuwa kweli mnatafuta good husband msinge lialia hivi.
     
Loading...