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Kuna hiki kiumbe lakini cha ajabu hapa duniani

Discussion in 'JF Chit-Chat' started by jamii01, Jan 11, 2012.

  1. jamii01

    jamii01 JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Jan 11, 2012
    Joined: Oct 1, 2010
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    Kuna hiki kiumbe lakini cha ajabu hapa duniani
    kiitwacho Mwanaume. Ni cha ajabu kutokana na uwezo
    wake wa kubadilika kufuatana na mazingira kilichomo
    kwa wakati husika. Hakika hata yule bingwa wa
    kujibadili kinyonga haoni ndani. Angalia kwa mfano
    mazungumzo ya simu ya kiumbe hiki. Miaka kama kumi nyuma wakati kikifahamika kwa sifa ya 'mchumba wa mtu':

    "Sweetheart! Habari za asubuhi"
    "Nzuri tu dear, sijui wewe !"
    "Aa, mimi hali yangu sio nzuri kabisa"
    "Ee nini tena Dear !"
    "Nimekumiss mpenzi wangu, halafu usiku mzima wa jana
    nakuota tu!"
    "Jamani pole sana mpenzi"
    " Asante lakini haitoshi darling ! Hivi kwanza leo
    nitakuona saa ngapi?"
    "Sijui wewe labda unifuate wakati wa lanchi !"
    "Ok basi, wife to be endelea na kazi huku ukiendelea
    kukumbuka ule wimbo wangu ninaoupenda kukuimbia !"
    "Mh? Upi tena huo dear ?"
    "Aaah unaniangusha darling ! Si ule wa oh my sweet,
    my sugar, let melove you forever, oo yes!, umeukumbuka
    ?!"
    "Alaa! Huo! Basi nimeukumbuka! Bye dear!"
    "Bye, nibusu basi"
    "Baadaye dear, kuna watu hapa!"
    "Ok basi!"



    Haya basi miaka kumi na mbili na watoto wanne baadaye
    hiki kiumbe mwanaume sasa kina hadhi ya 'mume wa mtu'
    na sasa tunakutana nacho kikipiga simu kwa yulee mtu
    aliyekuwa mchumba wake miaka kumi na mbili nyuma na
    ambaye sasa anakwenda kwa hadhi ya "mkewe". Mazungumzo
    yaokwenye simu sasa ni "makavu" kama mtumba wa Manzese
    ........!
    "Hujambo ?"
    "Sijambo ! Za kazi ?"
    " Safi , hawajambo hao ?"
    "Hawajambo tu !"
    "Huyu aliyekuwa anaharisha vipi ?"
    "Anaendelea vizuri, nimempa enthoromycin naona
    inamsaidia"
    "Sawa huyo fundi wa TV naye kishafika ?"
    "Sijamuona !"
    "Sawa, akija muangalie sana asiibe vitu kwenye hiyo
    TV !"
    "Sawa, sasa Baba nanii...!"
    "Unasemaje?"
    "Kuhusu ile losheni"
    "Umeshaanza! Nimesema nitakununulia! "
    "Jamani Baba nanii.....! Mwezi wa pili huu sasa, kila
    siku unaniambia hivyo hivyo!"
    "Alaa! Tumeshaanza kuhesabiana siku sasa!"
    "Basi yaishe ! Mimi nilikuwa nakukumbusha"
    "Haya, mimi nitachelewa kurudi nyumbani kidogo kuna
    jamaa naenda kumcheki nikitoka kazini !"
    "Sawa"
    "Baadaye basi"
    "Sawa"



    Kiumbe kiitwacho mwanaume kinamaliza kuongea na mkewe
    na kukata simu.Bila shaka utapata taabu kukubali
    kwamba huyo ndiye yule yule aliyekuwa anaongea kwenye
    simu ya kwanza miaka kumi na mbili iliyopita. Bila
    shaka pia utajiuliza, yako wapi maneno yale 'darling',
    sweetheart', mpenzi na wimbo wa 'ooh my sweet my
    sugar!' sasa yamekuwa ni bidhaa adimu mdomoni mwa mume
    na masikioni kwa mkewe. Lakini ni kweli kwamba maneno
    hayo yamekuwa bidhaa adimu kwenye mdomo wa kiumbe hiki,
    mume ?
    Hebu tusikilize simu hii ya mwisho ya kiumbe huyu
    dakika chache tu baada ya kuongea na mkewe anaongea na
    simu hii akiwa amevua ile hadhi ya mume na kujivika
    mwenyewe bila kushurutishwa na mtu, hadhi ya buzi na
    anayeongea naye ni kiumbe mwenye hadhi ya mchuna buzi.
    Patamu hapo, babu yangu!
    "Haloo, darling!"
    "haloo mambo"
    "Poa! Unafanya nini sasa hivi darling wangu?!"
    "Aaa nipo tu natengeneza nywele zangu!"
    "Yees ! Zitengeneze vizuri ule mtindo ninaoupenda,
    jioni nitapita hapo nikupeleke ukapate vikuku na
    vikopo viwili vitatu!"
    "Sawa darling ! Halafu dear, vipi kuhusu vile vitenge
    vya Zaire wanavyopitisha wale kinamama niliokuambia! ?"
    "Darling na wewe ! Si nilishakwambia wakipitisha tena
    we chukua tu pea mbili halafu uniambie tu mimi
    nitakupa pesa?!"
    " Asante ! Na vile viatu je ?"
    "Darling sasa unataka kuniudhi ! Nimeshakuambia kuwa
    sio lazima uniombe ruksa kila kitu ! We chukua halafu
    unaniambia..
     
  2. Darlingtone

    Darlingtone JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Jan 11, 2012
    Joined: Jan 9, 2011
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    Kwa hiyo bora uwe hii sehemu ya mwisho
     
  3. A

    Ashangedere Senior Member

    #3
    Jan 11, 2012
    Joined: Aug 9, 2010
    Messages: 119
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    Duu sasa ndoa ya kazi gani hapo? bora kuwa mchuna buzi maisha yenyewe yako wapi??!! aaaiii.
     
  4. Tz-guy

    Tz-guy JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Jan 11, 2012
    Joined: Aug 10, 2011
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    Nitajitahidi nisiwe hivyo, yaani mimi nitakuwa malavudav mwanzo-mwisho.
     
  5. nitonye

    nitonye JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Jan 11, 2012
    Joined: Dec 18, 2011
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    wakwangu nitamwita darling, sweetheart, hny mpaka mwisho wa dahari
     
  6. DMussa

    DMussa JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Jan 11, 2012
    Joined: Sep 24, 2007
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    Habadilishwi m2 jina hapa!! Ni sweetie/darling kwa kwenda mbele...... wa kwangu nikimuita kwa jina lake halisi anajua kuna ishu ameitibua cos sio kawaida yangu!
     
  7. ndetichia

    ndetichia JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Jan 11, 2012
    Joined: Mar 18, 2011
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    ngoja nitaimalizia baadae ngoja nifike hapa pspf mara moja :car:
     
  8. Mrembo

    Mrembo JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Jan 11, 2012
    Joined: Oct 9, 2008
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    nafikiri haya mambo ukitaka yaendelee, yataendelea tu, ni jinsi wewe mwenyewe unavyomuhandle jamaa.
    wanawake msiwe mnagombeza gombeza waume zenu, mna wa put off!
    we ongea naye taratibu hata kama anakuuzi, atalainika mwenyewe.
     
  9. Kireka1980

    Kireka1980 JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Jan 11, 2012
    Joined: Mar 18, 2008
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    mh lakini neno darling/swt kuyarudia rudia kwa mtuu huyo huyo yanachosha, inafika siku especialy akitokea darling mpya unakuwa hulitamki tena labda ukituma msg ulimi unakuwa mzito kulitamka.
    Kwenye ndoa mnavyopata mtoto mama anahamishia hayo maneno baby, darling... kwa mtoto so na baba inabidi utafute pa kuyahamishia ili muende sawa...lol
     
  10. w

    wakojako Member

    #10
    Jan 11, 2012
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    Huenda wenzetu nchi hizoooo..baadhi yao hufanya mahusiano haya kuwa ni mkataba wa kipindi fulani
    hofu na mashaka ni kuogopa kufikia hapo ktk mizozo,kuchukiana n.k
     
  11. figganigga

    figganigga JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Jan 11, 2012
    Joined: Oct 17, 2010
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    hahahaaa...!!. safi sana, nimeipenda hii. ukiona hivyo ujue penzi limekuwa mature hamna mchezo tena, ukikosea kofi ukileta mzaha kwenu.hapo kubali ukatae utakuwa mpole tu. Mia
     
  12. Mabagala

    Mabagala JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Jan 11, 2012
    Joined: Nov 27, 2009
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    aliniambia ' baby siku izi hunitumii tena sms nzuri nzuri' nikamwambia mi sio mtunzi wa mashairi kutunga tunga visentensi kama ivyo. am not good in that.
     
  13. K

    Kubingwa JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Jan 11, 2012
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    Nani awe sehemu hii ya mwisho,mke au mume?
     
  14. cheusimangala

    cheusimangala JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Jan 11, 2012
    Joined: Feb 27, 2010
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    nimegundua kitu,hata mama pia kabadilika jamani tusiwalaumu tu wanaume,nimejaribu kufuatilia lugha ya mama na yenyewe sio ile lugha ya miaka ileee akiwa mchumba,mama kasalimiwa "hujambo" kajibu sijambo,za kazi" ili nimtetee mama alitakiwa ajibu"sijambo mume wangu,za kazi darling,au honey au baby au sweet au vyovyote kama wenyewe walivyozoea.Hapa inaonesha wote washakua butu,mmoja akirudi nyuma mwenzake anatakiwa amvute mwenzke mbele kwa kumuonesha upendo utakaofanya akumbuke jinsi ilivyokua raha wkt mnapendana sasa baba kabadilika anajibu kijeshi na mama naye anapokea kimwanamgambo kwanin baba asinaswe na lugha tamu za nyumba ndogo.Sisemi baba anafanya vizur lkn kwa vile ndiye anayelaumiwa hapa ilibidi mama ndio aoneshe mfano mzur.
     
  15. Ringo Edmund

    Ringo Edmund JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Jan 11, 2012
    Joined: May 10, 2010
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    wa kwangu namwita mamayoyoooo kwisha kazi.
    utawanyenyekea utaweza?kajaribu kwenda serengeti ukapande mgongoni mwa tembo kisa uliona india wakiwapandia uone kichapo yake.
    punda wa ulaya haya bakora hawazijui.
     
  16. client3

    client3 JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Jan 11, 2012
    Joined: Aug 6, 2007
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    sawa na avatar yako
     
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