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Baada ya fumanizi.........fukia mashimo........haraka............

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Rutashubanyuma, Dec 25, 2010.

  1. Rutashubanyuma

    Rutashubanyuma JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Dec 25, 2010
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    Njia sita za kutibu majeraha yatokanayo na maumivu ya kumfumania mpenzi wako..................

    1) MUDA...................ndiyo tiba nambari moja............wahenga waliposema wakati ukuta walijua walichoongea.................

    2) UWAZI....................Unapoona mpenziyo mkosefu yupo tayari kuungama yote ujue ana nia ya dhati ya kutubu na kujirekebisha na uwezekano wa kurudia lilelile kosa ni mdogo..........................................

    3) UPAMOJA.........................Zifanyike jitihada za wazi na makusudi muwe na shughuli za pamoja zinazowaleta karibu ikiwemo kuimarisha mawasiliano kati yenu...........................................

    4) USIWE UNAKUMBUSHIA KUMBUSHIA KILA MARA ...........................Kwenye hili akina mama ndiyo magwiji wa kukumbushia yale yaliyowaudhi bila ya kujua wanatonesha vidonda na yawezekana kabisa wakamkatisha mpenzi wako ambaye ana nia kabisa ya kujirekebisha.............................kwa hiyo kumsonya baada ya kukiri na kuahidi kujirekebisha ni kukaribisha dhoruba litokanalo na kukatishwa tamaa..................

    Kumbukeni yaliyopita si ndwele........................................


    5) WAKWEPE WABAYA WAKO.................Wale wote waliokutia majaribuni ndiyo wabaya wako na ni busara ukakaa nao mbali kwa nia njema tu ya kuimarisha mahusiano yako na wandani wako.........Kumbuka bila ya kujitoa mhanga hakuna mafanikio..........na hakuna jema litakalo jijenga lenyewe bila ya kupaliliwa na kumwagiliwa penzi la mara kwa mara.......................................

    6) Hili itabidi nilirudie tena...............................MUDA NI jibu la kudumu.........kadri muda unavyoyoyoma na vidonda vya kimoyo navyo hupata hahueni ya kutosha................hivyo usisahau ya kuwa SUBIRA YAVUTA FARAJA.................


    Have your say on this tricky subject.......................
     
  2. Rutashubanyuma

    Rutashubanyuma JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Dec 25, 2010
    Joined: Sep 24, 2010
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    Recovering from an affair









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    By LILLIAN KITHIAPosted Friday, December 24 2010 at 11:53

    I once stumbled upon a book on the internet titled, ‘My husband's affair became the best thing that ever happened to me' and at first it seemed to me like its author was in denial of the adverse effects that her husband's infidelity could have had on her.



    But as I read the book and begun to see how her life had gradually changed since the moment she stopped blaming herself for her man's philandering ways, I realised one thing, an obvious tragedy does not necessarily mean the end of the world- or the end of a marriage for that matter.

    However, while Anne Bercht, the author of the aforementioned book may have found new meaning in life after being betrayed by her better half, such is not always the case with every affair scenario.

    As a matter of fact, we have all at least met women who can recount the details of their husband's affairs that happened more than twenty years ago, like they happened yesterday.

    But though it may be hard to forgive and forget and like Ms. Bercht, turn your man's affair into the best thing that ever happened to you, how do you ensure that you do not forever look at it as the worst thing that ever happened to you? Here are some pointers:

    Don't take it out on the other woman: It is your husband you are in a relationship with, and the other woman owes you no explanations. Truth is, she probably doesn't even know that your man is married, and if she does, she clearly doesn't care.

    So don't call her and try to give her a piece of your mind as nothing will be achieved this way - your conversation will only turn into an altercation. Talk it out with your man instead.

    Don't try to make sense out of nonsense: When you confront your spouse, one of these two things may happen; he will either be forthcoming and remorseful or distant and rude.

    Whichever his reaction, be careful as distant and rude means that he is not sorry and he could do it again while his remorse could be a decoy. Do not try to excuse his actions or the way he responds to your confrontation.

    Remember that rationalising your cheating spouse's behaviour or sympathising with him is pointless. Resist the urge to try and make him love you: Many women blame themselves for their partner's infidelities.

    They wonder what it is they could have done to ensure that the man remained in love with only them. Resist the urge to do this. Don't cut your hair or break a bank getting a make-over. At least not for him. His actions are not your fault.

    Re-evaluate yourself. Has this happened to you before? Are you a bad-boy magnet? Do you give off the wrong kind of vibe that makes it hard for a man to respect you?

    Are you too afraid of losing your man that you let him get away with dis**************respecting you? Answering these questions will ensure you don't get hurt again.

    Be patient: Give yourself time and permission to mourn. Something has been stolen from you. You can never get it back. Something has been lost forever.

    You will never again be able to know that since your marriage you are the only one your husband has ever been with. The most important promise, a vow, has been broken. Don't fight the feeling to cry or binge, give yourself time to mourn and you will soon get over it.

    Move on from it: Whether with your husband or not, you need to move on from the affair. Sadly, this is where most women get stuck. Don't spend the rest of your life recounting the affair to everyone who cares to listen.

    It is absolutely vital for you to move forward with life and love. Remember that it is better to be healthy alone than sick with someone else. If your partner wants back in, he will have to earn his way back into the relationship. Renegotiate the relationship in a way that works for both of you.

    Remember that for you to be able to enjoy love after this being willing to trust again is key. Take things one step at a time. Time heals nothing. It is what you do with the time that matters.
     
  3. Chimunguru

    Chimunguru JF-Expert Member

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    Dec 25, 2010
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    Jamani mbona huyo mtoto ana LIPS tamu namna hiyooo picha imenifanya nisisome tena mada iliyopo dah!!!!!!!!!
     
  4. Rutashubanyuma

    Rutashubanyuma JF-Expert Member

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    Ni vizuri umepitia mada ili ukikutwa na taabu hizo ujue namna ya kujinasua......................
     
  5. BAK

    BAK JF-Expert Member

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    Dec 25, 2010
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    Hehehe unapenda lips kama hizo eh! hahahahahahaha inaelekea wewe ni mtu wa vijuice kwa sana tu.

     
  6. Rutashubanyuma

    Rutashubanyuma JF-Expert Member

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    Panapofuka moshi panaficha moto.................................
     
  7. M

    Mokoyo JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Dec 25, 2010
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    mwenye macho na aone na mwenye masikio na asikie pia mwenye mikono na apapase. Asante Ruta
     
  8. St. Paka Mweusi

    St. Paka Mweusi JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Dec 25, 2010
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    Wote mliosoma mada hii naomba kuwauliza,mlishawahi kufumaniwa,kama bado mna mpango wa kufumaniwa?
     
  9. NILHAM RASHED

    NILHAM RASHED JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Dec 26, 2010
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    kwani we ulifunguaje post hii ulishawahi na wewe pia paka utudokolee tukupe pole usikae kimya tuu???????
     
  10. St. Paka Mweusi

    St. Paka Mweusi JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Dec 26, 2010
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    Mi sijawahi kufumaniwa bado ila nina mpango huo kwa sababu nimechoka kufanya siri,na ndio sababu nimepitia hapa.
     
  11. NILHAM RASHED

    NILHAM RASHED JF-Expert Member

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    Dec 26, 2010
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    haa paka???????? mi bado nak:redfaces::redfaces:utaka udumu jf usije ukafanya hivyo,,,,please????????????
     
  12. St. Paka Mweusi

    St. Paka Mweusi JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Dec 26, 2010
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    Usihofu mama,JF nitakuwepo tu maana fumanizi hilo nitalipanga mwenyewe, nikisha fumaniwa mwenye mke namdunda na kumzushia kesi ya ujambazi,akishafungwa mimi ndio nitabakia na mke wake.
     
  13. Magulumangu

    Magulumangu JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Dec 26, 2010
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    Mkuu wewe yamekukuta haya au unasema tuuuu?

    1. Muda wote umekuwa mwaminifu kwa mke au mme wako then someone anakuja na kula tunda lako wewe huo muda wa kulilima na kulipalilia hilo penzi lenu siku moja tu kibweka kinakuja kubweka wewe utajiskiaje?

    2.Halafu wewe wengine huungama wakijua kabisa atasamehewa au hutikisa kiberiti tu lakini umsamehapo tu anarudia tena, je hapa utafanyaje wewe? Muonye na mwambie ukirudia tena adhabu yako utaijua mwenyewe....

    3..hilo la tatu sio muhimu sana kama kuna uaminifu ndani ya mahusiano yenu, Uaminifu ni nguzo katika mapenzi no matter how far you are ndugu yangu, unaweza kuwa karibu sana nayeye lakini anamegwa nje au anamega nje...

    4.Unajua wewe msemo usemao Akingg'atwa na nyoka hata akisikia majani yanapeperushwa na upepo huruka? au watu wengine akiona kichaka tu mavi hayooooo...Wewe ukimegewa mkeo au mmeo amege nje na wewe kila siku u mwaminifu kwa ndoa yako kuna kitu kinakuja akilini huwa kinakuja kila wakati mkuu acha......

    5..Charity huanzia nyumbani, ukiwa mwaminifu kwenye ndoa yako au mahusiano yako kila kitu hujileta chenyewe mkuu, mapenzi ni risk sawa hapo nakupa zoooote, kwa hilo njoo ule bata kwangu...Mwamini na atakwamini hilo nakuhakikishia mkuu wangu, kuna vitu hapa wanaume au wanawake tunakuwa wote wakosefu, wewe unapigiwa simu na mtu yeyote hutaki kupokea lililopo unasema eti anakusumbua, au achana nae au kisababu cha kijinga tu, hapa 10% ya mpenzio uaminifu kwako unapungua, mpe uhuru wa kujua wewe ni nani kwake, anaweza asikuulize lkn swali kwake lipo tu, pokea simu na usikimbilie bafuni au nje kama kweli wewe mwaminifu...

    6.Hapa nitazidi kurudia tena muda sio muhimu zaidi ya uaminifu wewe, jiamini na mambo yako, jiamini na mwezeshe mpenziwe akuamini pia bila hivyo muda wote mnakuwa pamoja utakuwa ni kupotezeana tu na kudanganyana...

    UAMINIFU KAKA na DADA ni muhimu....mie na mke wangu 5years now toka tujuane 2 years kwenye ndoa,she is open to me am open to her pia, sipo nae kila wakati lakini moyoni niko nae, naweza acha simu yangu mezani na asiguse ikiita nitapokea kama nisipomwambia pokea hapokei, naongea anasikia kama vipi hupisha nikianza kuongea sio mimi nipishe na kujificha ya nini? Nasave majina halisi sio biashara badara ya Mwajuma ya nini kuficha?MWAMINI UTAAMINIWA.
     
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