Roger Sterling
JF-Expert Member
- May 10, 2015
- 13,010
- 23,656
by Debbie Harrower
Look, we know that there are plenty of he-devils roaming around, breaking womens hearts with their lies and cheating. Then theres the other bunch, who might not lie and cheat but have a fear of commitment, or maybe just have annoying ways which dont gel with us.
When it comes to relationship and dating horror stories, we ALL have the T-shirt maybe even the whole collection (I think I fall into the whole collection category).
Women can be just as faulty with their ways, and maybe, just like some men, they dont even realize that their behavior is making their partners / potential partners head for the hills sprinting!
Nobody is perfect. I think were all trying to do our best every day, and sometimes even your best is not good enough. Were human. Were going to fail (sometimes epically) at this amazing adventure of life and love. And, thats okay. BUT
If youve been single and dating for a while or if your relationships end before theyve even really had a chance to start, and youre the one who is consistently on the poo-end of the dumping stick, surely you have to realize that you are the common denominator? That there is something you are doing, some or other vibe that you are giving off that is making men run in the opposite direction.
#Expecting to be treated like a princess
There is nothing wrong with wanting to be treated well and with respect by the man you are dating. But, it needs to work both ways. You cant have one giver and one taker in a relationship not if you want the relationship to last.
A man wants a woman in his life, not a demanding spoilt brat who expects to be put on a pedestal, treated like a delicate flower and showered with attention and gifts all the time.
If a man picks up on a princess vibe from you, alarm bells start ringing. Princess types are generally very hard to please and very expensive. He MIGHT stick around for a while the players will play your game until they get you into bed and then theyll be out of there. The normal / decent guys you wont get more than one or two dates out of them.
#Control freak
Are you the woman whos not bossy, she just knows what you should be doing?
Not sure? Heres what will make men feel that youre a control freak
*Rigid / does not like or deal well with spontaneity basically someone who is not even remotely laid back
*Needy / possessive wants to be with him all the time, calls and messages constantly and freaks out when he does not reply promptly
*Jealous doesnt want him looking at or even talking to other women. Immediately hates all his exes. A woman who thinks that couples should have a joint Facebook account. Doesnt think boys / girls nights or bulls parties are good ideas. That kind of thing will not wash well with any normal man.
*My way or the highway attitude
#Not over your ex
If youre still stuck on your ex, either stop dating until youre not, OR, at least stop talking about him when youre on a date.
Would you like to be on a date with a guy who cant stop bringing up his ex?
Imagine if he was saying things like:
Oh you drink rooibos tea too? So did my ex!
Yes, I love exercising. My ex got me into it she was a fitness model
Im so glad you like to eat, my ex was always watching her weight
Gosh! I would be counting down the minutes until the date was over and Id not see him again.
Its normal for you both to want to know why the other person is currently single. But, you need to learn to give a simple answer and to leave it at that. He does not need details and he definitely does not want to hear about your ex all night.
Its a huge put-off for anyone.
#Miss Materialistic
If youre the type of woman who is all about money and only cares about what a man does for a living, how much he earns, where he lives, what car he drives and what he can offer you, youre not only going to scare men off, youre also limiting yourself from finding true and real happiness.
Most men can sniff out a gold-digger from a mile away
A trendy Asian woman shopaholic with black dress, sunglasses and department store bags accepts money from her wealthy husband looking at camera.
There is already so much pressure on men to achieve and be super-successful. The last thing they want or need is a woman who will only be there, with them, when the the good times are rolling. Dont be that woman.
Dont turn your nose up at the men who are still climbing the ladder the ones who are ambitious and trying really hard to make something of their life. They might not drive the best car or live in a beautiful home, but, theyll get there. Wouldnt you rather be the woman who was with and stood by her man and supported him while he was still trying?
#The I specialist
No, not an eye doctor that specializes in the medical and surgical care of the eyes were talking about the woman who specializes in all thing relating to her. Her favorite subject is herself.
Shes so into herself that nearly all of her sentences start with I
This type of woman comes off (very obviously) as vain, self-centered and like very hard work.
I dont think any woman in her right mind would want to be with a man who is self-centered, cant stop talking about himself and expects everything to be about him all the time. So, its not difficult to understand why men are put off by women who act like this.
If you identify with one or more of these traits, here are a few tips:
Just because Mom and Dad treated you like their little princess, dont expect men or anyone else to do the same. Get over yourself and grow up.
Stop expecting material things from men. Expect loyalty, respect, trust and honesty. All the extras sort that out yourself. Whatever he gives you over and above whats REALLY important is just an added bonus. It should not be what you are seeking.
Check your baggage at the counter before every new date.
Dont just offer to pay the bill occasionally, actually insist on it and do it.
Be conscious of your conversation be sure to ask lots of questions. Be genuinely interested.
Learn to relax there is no need to be on his case 24/7
Treat him well, cook him dinner that kind of thing. Any woman who wants to be treated like a queen, had better be or learn to treat her man like a king.