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Nenda taratibu lakini changamka katika mapenzi

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by MziziMkavu, Sep 9, 2012.

  1. MziziMkavu

    MziziMkavu JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Sep 9, 2012
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    ''Ujumbe Muhimu kwa akina Dada zangu hii Thread''


    Mara nyingi Wanawake huwa Wanapenda au kutaka kuwa kwenye uhusiano wa kimapenzi na kila kitu kiende sawia kabisa bila matatizo, hii ni kutokana na sababu nyingi tofauti kama vile

    -kuwa mpweke kwa muda mrefu,
    -kuwa na "foleni"ndefu ya mahusiano mafupi na sasa anahisi kuwa wakati umefika wa kukaa na kutulia na mtu mmoja,
    -uoga wa kuachwa/kuumizwa,
    -kuhisi ameachwa(left out) kwa vile rafiki zake wana wapenzi,
    -kuhisi umri umekwenda n.k.


    Haijalishi una uzoefu mbaya au mzuri ktk mahusiano ya kimapenzi…unachotakiwa kufanya ni kutuliza akili na kucheza taratibu. Ukichukulia mambo taratibu itakusaidia sana kujua hisia zako juu ya mwenzio na pia kumjua/fahamu huyo mpenzi kabla mambo hayajawa “makini” hali itakayokusaidia kutoumia sana ikiwa atagundua kuwa humfai au wewe kutambua kuwa hayuko vile ulivyotegemea n.k.


    Vilevile kwenda kwako taratibu kutamfanya huyo “mpenzi mpya” kuwa “comfortable” na wewe, kwa vile hautokuwa mtu wa kulazimisha mambo yatokee vile unavyotaka……..Sisi Wanaume wengi huwa hatupendi kuwa “pushed” kwa vile uhisi hawapendwi bali unapenda kufanikisha jambo fulani kama ktk maisha yako na sio kwenye maisha yenu “as a couple”.


    Kumbuka kuwa Wanaume hutumia uongo mwingi ili “washinde” na wakupate, hivyo kuwa mwangalifu najifunze “kuchuja” maneno/mistari yao wanapokushawishi/Kukutongoza uwe nao, mara nyingi hutoa ahadi nyingi ambazo hu-“sound” kama wanaji-“commit” kwako kabla hata hujawajua vema.


    Wewe kama Mwanamke unatakiwa kuwa makini, msikivu, mwelevu na mwepesi kuhoji ikiwa utahisi unayoambiwa ni “too much….too soon”, sio macho chini na kila kitu….Ok, haya, sawa, ai wewe……ndio…..wasema kweli mjuba…..n.k.……changamka!


    Kumbuka kitakacho kufanya umdondokee Mtu kimapenzi kabla hata ya kungonoana sio muonekano wake tu (au pesa kwa wengine wazembe-wazembe) bali kumjua kiundani baada ya kuzungumza nae……unapomhoji mwenzio ni rahisi kujua uta-offer nini kwenye uhisiano ili uwe bora na yeye atachangia vipi ili mtoke “pea” nzuri na ya muda mrefu.


    Maelezo yake kutokana na maswali yako yatakuwezesha wewe utafakari na kufanya uamuzi wa busara hali kadhalika maswali yako yatamfanya yeye afikiri zaidi ikiwa ni myeyushaji/muongo lakini “anakutaka” basi anaweza kubadili yote aliyosema/ahidi jana kwani kagundua kuwa wewe sio wa kudanganyika…..na akiendelea hamtofika mbali….hii yote nitakuwa imetokana na kuchangamka kwako kwenye kuhoji pale ulipohisi jamaa natoa ahadi kamavile ninyi ni “couple” tayari kumbe ndio kwanza mna-date.


    Kumbuka mtu anapoku-“date” haina maana kuwa mko kwenye uhusiano na mara nyingi hushauriwi kufanya ngono ktk kipindi hicho……”date” inaweza kuchukua siku tatu mpaka miezi 4 kabla hujajitolea mwili wako.

    Haya akina Dada hiyo ni shule tosha kwenu kazi kwenu.
     
  2. Heart

    Heart JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Sep 9, 2012
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    Ahsante sana mzizi...umenigusa palipo!
     
  3. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Sep 9, 2012
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    Naomba nizingumzie para ya kwanza tu!

    Umesema wanawake wanapenda mambo yaende vizuri kwenye mahusiano, nakubaliana; je inamaanisha ninyi wanaume hampendi mambo yaende vizuri?
     
  4. MziziMkavu

    MziziMkavu JF-Expert Member

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    Sep 9, 2012
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    Tunapenda lakini Wanaume tuna pupa tukipenda tunataka haraka haraka haina baraka mkuu Kaunga
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  5. Preta

    Preta JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Sep 9, 2012
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    asante kwa somo zuri.....
     
  6. Bishop Hiluka

    Bishop Hiluka Verified User

    #6
    Sep 9, 2012
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    Duh, hii ni shule iliyokamilika, thanks MziziMkavu
     
  7. Lambardi

    Lambardi JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Sep 9, 2012
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    Nikiwaona wazee (zaidi ya 60 yrs) bado wapo kwenye ndoa wanaanza kulea wajukuu zao baada ya kustaafu huwa nawaonea raha sana maana nikiangalia kizazi cha sasa kwa utandawazi huu,sidhani kama ndoa nyingi zitafika huko wakiwa na furaha na amani tele bila kuwa wametengana mazima!maisha ya sasa hasa ya ndoa changamoto ni nyingi sanaa ,wanandoa wanahitaji maombi,uvumilivu sanaa
     
  8. mdida

    mdida JF-Expert Member

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    asante bro kwa somo zuri
     
  9. K

    Kaldinali JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Sep 9, 2012
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    Mkuu umeandika somo takatifu lililotukuka. Aksante kwa niaba ya kiadada.
     
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