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KERO ZIWEZAZO KUHARIBU UHUSIANO - KWA mtizamo wa mwanamke

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by WomanOfSubstance, Jul 20, 2010.

  1. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

    #1
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    Mabandiko kadhaa yamefanya nianzishe mada hii. Inaelekea akina kaka/baba wanadhania kuwa mzigo wa kuimarisha uhusiano ni kazi ya akina dada/mama.Wanadhani kuwa kuna vitu wakina dada/mama wakivifanya vingeimarisha mapenzi au mahusiano.Kuna dhana pia kuwa wanawake wanapoolewa wanabweteka na kujiona wamefika.
    Binafsi nadhani wote tuna jukumu na wajibu wa kuimarisha penzi, ndoa au uhusiano. Ningependa akina kaka/baba wayajue makosa yao yenye kusababisha kuvunjika au kuparaganyika uhusiano. Nitaanza kwa machache kama ifuatavyo:
    1.Kujisahau na kubweteka pale mwanaume anapompata mwanamke/mke.
    Hata wanawake nao hukerwa na hali hii, kwamba mwanaume anadhani kuwa maadam kaoa au kapata mpenzi, basi hawajibiki tena kuonyesha kujali au manjonjo mengine aliyokuwa akimuonyesha mpenzi wake. Maua hayaletwi tena, hakuna simu za hapa na pale, hakuna kujijali yeye mwenyewe nk.

    2. Utegemezi
    Baadhi ya wanaume wamekuwa na tabia ya kuwaachia wake zao mzigo wa familia, kuanzia chakula, ada za shule, na gharama nyingine.Hapo panachekesha hasa pale mwanaume anapolazimisha atambuliwe kuwa yeye ndio kichwa cha familia lakini hapo hapo haonyeshi uongozi wa aina yoyote. Hii inakera sana.

    3. Wivu uliovuka mipaka
    Wivu ni kiashiria kizuri cha kupendwa sikatai na huwa Unanogesha mapenzi sana.Hakuna raha mwanamke anaipata kama pale mpenzi wake anapoonyesha wivu. Inachekesha kidogo lakini.Wivu wa mpenzi pale hajakuoa na wivu wa mume wakati mwingine huleta ladha tofauti kabisa. Mpenzi wako akiwa na wivu huvumilika na kufurahisha.Wivu wa mume wakati mwingine huwa kero. Kero hasa pale unapoelekezwa kukupunguzia tija kikazi, unapoelekezwa kukupunguzia kujiamini. Mume anapoonyesha wivu unaolekea katika unyanyasaji hapa hauchochei penzi bali huchochea chuki na kuweka ufa katika uhusiano.


    nitarudi tena.... endelezeni kina dada/mama...
    kina kaka/baba mnaruhusiwa kuchangia pia...
     
  2. Teamo

    Teamo JF-Expert Member

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    4-kuna hali fulani ya wanandoa ''kuzoeana''!..aisee this is the worst case scenario
     
  3. FirstLady1

    FirstLady1 JF-Expert Member

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    Leo ni leo Ngoja nikapate kwanza ugali na mlenda nakuja:A S tongue:
     
  4. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

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    Hebu fafanua ndugu yangu...
    Kama uhusiano ni wa kindoa, wataacha vipi kuzoeana?
     
  5. Teamo

    Teamo JF-Expert Member

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    okay kuzoeana kupo....!
    lakini kwenye ndoa ukishaanza kumzoea mwenzio umekwisha!maanake utamwona ''wa kawaida'',utamwona ''yule yule'',itafika muda hata kutoka nae hutaweza.....!sasa kisaikolojia ndo utapata athari kubwa zaidi!na mapenzi kama unavyojua mama NI STATE OF ONESELF'S MIND!

    enewei nyamayao hebu ongea bwana mi naogopa ufafanuzi wangu nitahojiwa ''experience''
     
  6. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

    #6
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    Teamo,
    Nimekuelewa sana..ila napata shida sana kujua mtu afanyeje ili kwenye ndoa asizoeane na mwenza wake.
     
  7. Da Womanizer

    Da Womanizer JF-Expert Member

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    Jul 20, 2010
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    Haya sasa.....................
     
  8. Nyani Ngabu

    Nyani Ngabu Platinum Member

    #8
    Jul 20, 2010
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    Haya mapenzi haya....ndio maana wengine tumeamua kuwa waseja tu. Unapata kishtobe, unakimega halafu huyo unaanza mbele. Maana kila siku ni malalamiko na mahuzuniko. Kila siku kunyoosheana vidole na kutupiana lawama. Wanaume hivi wanawake vile....ulimwengu na walimwengu na malimwengu yao!!

    Haya bana...
     
  9. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

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    Bora NN umekata shauri.
    Wengine tulishaingia kifungoni...kifungo cha milele hadi kifo! DUH!
     
  10. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

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    5. Kutokusema samahani - najua hili ni jambo gumu kwa yeyote awe mwanaume au mwanamke.
    Samahani mwanamke anayoitaka ni ile ya maneno "SA-MA-HA-NI" na siyo ya kununuliwa khanga na vitenge. Wenzetu wamezoea kufunga mdomo wakosapo na kudhani kuwa wanaweza kununua amani kwa pesa!Hli ni kosa kubwa sana akina kaka/baba.Ni bora useme neno lisilokuwa na bei kuliko kukana makosa na kukimbilia kununua dhahabu!
     
  11. Nyani Ngabu

    Nyani Ngabu Platinum Member

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    Hapana bana...siyo kifungo cha milele hicho. Unaweza kabisa kujinasua. Ni uamuzi tu. Kumbuka ile juzi nilikwambia kuhusu "lived experience". If you get my drift...................
     
  12. Nyani Ngabu

    Nyani Ngabu Platinum Member

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    Ila kuweeni waangalifu na hizi SA-MA-HA-NI. Mwanaume akikujulia kuwa akisema hivyo yataisha...atasema tu hata kama hamaanishi. Na mbaya zaidi huwezi kujua kama yuko sincere au anasema tu ili yaishe na wewe unyamaze.

    Lol...poleni mlio kwenye ndoa. Nawahurumia sana aisee.
     
  13. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

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    Talking of lived experience..... hizo hizo experiences ndio zinafanya watu wabakie... ukishazoea life pattern fulani inakuwa addictive.Si unajua life is full of highs and lows.. when its high unasahau kila kitu aisee... unaona kama life is sweet..la vie est belle!

    UTAACHA WANGAPI NN???..bora jini ulijualo fika kuliko malaika usiyemjua!
     
  14. Nyani Ngabu

    Nyani Ngabu Platinum Member

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    Basi hizo kero zenu zinavumilika....
     
  15. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

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    Hazivumiliki ila zinachukulika kutegemeana na mazingira na trade-offs
     
  16. BelindaJacob

    BelindaJacob JF-Expert Member

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    Pia kutupa tupa vitu yani nyumba ipo neat akirudi viatu & soksi sebuleni mana binafsi inanikera sana..Sijui kwa sababu napenda kuona mpangilio wa vitu mahali panapostahili au la!!

    Akitaka kutoka yeye anakutaarifu hata kwa sms wakati yupo eneo la tukio ila ukitaka kutoka wewe uombe ruhusa,agrrr! hii kera sana mimi kwakweli mana ni ubabe!!..
     
  17. Papa Mopao

    Papa Mopao JF-Expert Member

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    Ndo maana kuna wanawake wengine wakiona wanaume wao wakiwataarifu kwa kile walichofanya katika mihangaiko yao yaani kuwahusisha kwa kila jambo wanafurahi sana,waume wa dizaini hiyo ni wachche sana,wengi wao wanafanya mambo kimya kimya bila mke kujua alichofanya labda upeo wa mke ni mfupi kulinganisha na mume.
     
  18. BelindaJacob

    BelindaJacob JF-Expert Member

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    Papaa..nini kinaweza kukufanya wewe kama mwanaume kuhitimisha labda upeo wa mwanamke ni mfupi kuliko wenu? Au ni dharau tu hizi jamani, kuwa "who cares" mi ndo mwanaume na muamuzi wa yote!!..
     
  19. Lady N

    Lady N JF-Expert Member

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    kunifokea mbele za watu:-
    hata kama nimekukosea vipi, ukinifokea hadhari kwa kweli naumia sana, na hapo sitaomba samahani sanasana tutagombana tu. mwanaume wa kugombana na mkewe mbele za watu namshusha thamani kabisa
     
  20. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

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    kero kubwa wanawake wanazowapa wanaume

    1.kumchukulia mumeo kuwa ni loser kwa kuwa kipato
    kimepungua au ameachishwa kazi au umepata kibuzi nje chenye pesa..

    2,kutodai talaka pale unapoona kuwa basi,badala
    yake mnaanza vituko na maneno ya kuudhi....

    nitaendelea....
     
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