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Child abuse/udhalilishaji watoto...

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Mbu, Oct 7, 2009.

  1. Mbu

    Mbu JF-Expert Member

    #1
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    Hakuna cha hausigel wala hausboi siku hizi wote ni wabaya tu!
    Ilishatokea mtoto wa kiume wa miaka 6 kukutwa na magonjwa ya zinaa.Uchunguzi ukabaini kuwa Hausigel ndiye alimuambukiza mtoto.Mbu unaonaje ukaanzisha thread ya manyayaso ya watoto wa kiume?...
     
  2. Mbu

    Mbu JF-Expert Member

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    ...naomba nim quote ndugu yangu Sipo kwenye mada yake hii pia...
     
  3. Mbu

    Mbu JF-Expert Member

    #3
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    ...na hii pia...


     
  4. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

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    Mbu nashukuru kuwa umeitikia wito na kuanzisha hii mada kuntu.
    Unyanyaswaji wa watoto wa kiume umekuwa ni jambo linalofichwa sana.Mara nyingi ukisikia unyanyaswaji basi utasikia ni mtoto wa kike.Hii inatokana na mfumo tuliouzoea kwamba wanaonyanyaswa ni wanawake.Matokeo yake ni kufichaficha vitendo wanavyofanyiwa watoto wa kiume.Hata ile Sheria ya makosa ya kujamiiana ( Sexual Offences Special Provisions Act KWA KIFUPI SOSPA 1998 ilitengenezwa ikimlenga na kumlinda zaidi mtoto wa kike na siyo wa kiume na ndio maana hadi sasa hujasikia mwanamke akifungwa miaka 30 na kuendelea kwa kumnyanyasa kijinsia mtoto wa kiume.Tunajua kuwa sasa hivi ma hausigel wanawanyanyasa sana kijinsia watoto wa kiume.
    Binafsi nadhani ni wakati muafaka kuvunja ukimya na kuanza kuongea kwa nguvu zote kuhusu unyanyasaji wa wavulana.Hao serengeti boys tunaosikia wanawake wakiwatokea, wengine hawajafikia hata miaka 18.Iweje basi tunyamazie kero hii?
     
  5. Maria Roza

    Maria Roza JF-Expert Member

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    Nguvu zimeniishia nitarudi tena kuchangia hii hali inatisha jamni!!
     
  6. Gudboy

    Gudboy JF-Expert Member

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    kuna mambo makubwa sna, kiasi kwamba mtu ukiyasikia huwezi amini hadi likutokee kwenye familia yako ndio utaamini kuwa kumbe hili nalo lipo. Tuwe makini jamani
     
  7. Mbu

    Mbu JF-Expert Member

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    ...hivi mtoto wa kiume tuseme wa miaka kati ya 5-9yrs akifanyishwa tendo la ngono na mwanamke wa over 18yrs, kitendo hicho kinaitwa Ubakaji, au udhalilishaji kwa mtoto huyo?
     
  8. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

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    Ni udhalilishaji ... ubakaji ni pale kitu kitakapomuingia au kujaribiswha kumuingia mtoto ( intromission/penetration)...
    Mwanamke anachofanya ni kulazimisha mtoto kumuingia au yeye kumshikashika n.k.Imewahi kutokea mtoto alipata magonjwa ya zinaa na uchunguzi ukaonyesha kuwa hausgel alikuwa anamwambia mtoto amkojolee haja ndogo sehemu yake ya siri... sasa hapo aliyemuingia mwenziwe ni huyo mtoto wa kiume.
     
  9. Mbu

    Mbu JF-Expert Member

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    ...alaaa! ndio maana inaonekana kosa halina uzito!!!

    ...pheewww!

    unaona sasa! ...hilo ulilosema hapa lishawahi kunitokea!
    am scarred for life kila nikifikiria madhara yaliyompata yule dada
    kwa kumkojolea mkojo!
     
  10. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

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    wazazi wengi wamejenga ikani kubwa kwa wasichana walezi wa watoto wakidhani ati hao wako salama.Wasichojua ni kuwa wanawaharibu watoto kwa kiwango kikubwa mno kuliko hata wale ma hausboy! Nimewahi kuelezwa na mlezi wa shule ya bweni kuhusu kisa cha mtoto wa kiume wa miaka kama 7-8 ambaye kila shule ikifunguliwa, alikuwa anapata kama depression akiulizwa nini kinamsumbua hadi hawezi kuwa makini darasani- jibu lilikuwa " im missing our housegirl"!!
    Sasa hebu pateni picha..huyu hausgel alikuwa ameshajenga mahusiano mazito na huyu mtoto, alikuwa analala naye kitanda kimoja na mama aliona ni sawa tu " mwanangu anampenda sana hausgel wetu jamani.Yaani"!..hakuja kuwa yale yalikuwa mapenzi kweli.Ukiangalia umri wa mtoto ni dogo mno kuingia kwenye mapenzi.
     
  11. Mbu

    Mbu JF-Expert Member

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    ...Inawezekana pia sio mapenzi kwa maana ya mapenzi, bali ni ile Guilty conscious mtoto anayobakia nayo na kukua nayo.

    Katika maisha yangu yote sijapata kumsimulia mtu yeyote yaliyonikumba utotoni. kwanza, kitendo kile nilijua wazazi wakijua ni bakora kwa kwenda mbele...

    Pili, nilijua iwapo yule dada ataathirika kwa lolote mimi ndiye mkosa sababu nilimkojolea mkojo! Vile vile kwa wakati ule nilimuonea huruma huenda angetimuliwa kazi, au kuadhibiwa vibaya mno... hivyo kunifanya nimbebee mzigo wake wa dhambi!

    Tatu, Japokuwa kitendo hicho kilinitokea nikiwa na miaka mitano tu, bado nakikumbuka mpaka leo (kwa woga ule) na kuna wakati natamani kumhadithia mzazi wangu kilichotokea ingawa na hofu anaweza kupata pigo la moyo kali sana kwa kuteleza kwenye malezi.

    Kwenye jukwaa huru hili kidogo naweza kuwa muwazi, lakini kwa kweli najua waathirika wenzangu wanavyojisikia (kifungoni) baada ya kudhalilishwa huko utotoni kwa namna moja au nyingine...

    Mtoto wa kike kubakwa, au wa kiume kulawitiwa ni rahisi kidogo kujulikana...lakini kitendo kama nilichotendewa maana yake nilibeba jukumu kuliko umri wangu ulivyokuwa.

    Bahati mbaya, vitendo hivi bado vinaendelea,... na wazazi wakiwa wakali ndio kabisaaaa ...wanakosa kujua yanayowaathiri watoto wao.
     
  12. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

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    Mbu
    Thats a traumatic experience by any standards.
    MZAZI YEYOTE ATAUMIZWA SANA kujua kuwa mwanae mpendwa anaishi maisha ya ukimbizi nyumbani kwake!Jamani..ndio maana wakati mwingine watu hutaka akina mama wakae nyumbani walee watoto wao.
     
  13. Steve Dii

    Steve Dii JF-Expert Member

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    Daah, haya mambo yanakasirisha na kusikitisha sana.

    Kuna kisa kimoja kuhusiana na haya mambo nimeisikiliza HAPA kwenye dullonet.com kwenye hekaheka za Clouds FM ya tarehe 11-11-2009. Inasikitisha.
     
  14. M

    Mtu B JF-Expert Member

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    Kumbe tuko wengi wenye shida hii. Mimi nilipokuwa mtoto wa miaka 10 nilikuwa nafanyishwa ngono na mamangu mdogo (tumbo moja na mamangu mzazi), yeye alikuwa na miaka karibu 20 hivi. Na sikuwahi kumwambia mtu yeyote, kwa hofu aliyokuwa ananijengea ya litakalotokea kama hicho kitu kingejulikana.

    Lakini hadi leo najiuliza, suppose yule mamdogo angekuwa na ugonjwa wowote, sijui hata kama wazazi wangejua shida ilikotokea. Tatizo ni kwamba, wazazi wawalinde watoto wao dhidi ya nani? Maana hata nduguyo unayemuamini anaweza kumfanyizia mwanao.
     
  15. Steve Dii

    Steve Dii JF-Expert Member

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    Daah, Wewe Mtu B umepitia mengi sana maishani.
     
  16. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

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    Mtu B ni mtu B kweli..... ina maana uliposema kule kuwa ulikuwa mbaya ni kweli?..
    ubaya uliambukizwa na mama mdogo au?
    Mimi ndio maana nina wasiwasi na mtu yoyote kujenga mazoea sana na mtoto wangu! SIPENDI KABISA.
     
  17. Chimunguru

    Chimunguru JF-Expert Member

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    Nov 14, 2009
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    Jamani sio ma hausigirl tu hata ndugu. hiki kisa kilinitokea mimi mwenyewe nikiwa km 5 yrs, mama yangu alifariki nikiwa 3 yrs old baadaye baba alioa mwanamke mwingine, yule step mother alimchukua mtoto wa dada yake wa kike tulianza ishi naye toka akiwa darasa la tatu, nakumbuka nilikuwa nalala naye kitanda kimoJa ingawa nilikuwa na kaka yangu niliyepishana naye miaka minne alikuwa analala chumba kimoja na houseboy weTu mie nilionekana mdogo so wale dada zangu walionekana kuniangalia. alipofika darasa la tano alikuwa anapenda sana kuniogesha na kuchezea dudu yangu mie sielewi kinachoendelea kumbe mwenzangu mzuka unapanda. usiku tukilala anajidai hebu vua kaptura utakojolea so nalala naked kumbe mwenzangu usiku anachezea nyeti zangu, usiku mmoja naona mzuks ulimpanda mno akaamua kunibaka niliposhtuka akaniaMbia nisiseme ataninunulia biscuti, kweli niliogopa sikujua nini cha kufanya, baba yangu alikuwa mkali sana na kweli sikuweza mwambia mtu, sikuweza mwambia hata My step mom basi ndo ukawa mchezo wake ikifika usiku siku nyingine nashtuka nakuta mkono wangu kwenye kinembe nachezeshwa tu pale. huyu dada alikuwa ananipenda sana tena sana mpaka my step mom akawa anamsifia yule dada. for 3 yrs mpaka akamaliza std seven akaja kwa mama yake dar. kwa kweli hiki kitu hakijafutika akilini mwangu na mtu ambaye nimemwambia ni wife wangu only coz alianza tabia ya kumwamini sana hg wetu nikampa hiyo story, roho ilimuuma sana
     
  18. Mbu

    Mbu JF-Expert Member

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    Nov 15, 2009
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    ...ha ha ha... VeraCity, unachunga weee lakini mianya ipo mingi wakiamua kuhujumu. La msingi kuwa karibu na mwanao, kuwa muwazi, ikibidi mdadisi... lakini angalia usimtishe!

    Chimunguru na Mtu B, poleni sana, ...I empathise with you. Wameshatuwekea doa maishani lisilofutika, ..kila siku ya mungu iendayo unajihisi kama umebebeshwa mzigo fulani...
     
  19. TIMING

    TIMING JF-Expert Member

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    Nov 22, 2009
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    wajameni hili tatizo ni kubwa kuliko tunavyodani aisee!!! our kids are in avery risky environment. Kuna binamu yangu mtoto wake alikuwa akilambishwa ile kitu akapata very serious infection kwenye mdomo na koo... it took heavy antibiotics na dawa nyingine kumponya maana mwanzo walijua ni toncils

    Tatizo ni kwamba ukitaka kuwa na uhakika wa safety ya mtoto, then you need to stay at home
     
  20. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

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    Poleni sana ndugu zanguni - Mtu B, Chamunguru na Mbu....
    njia moja ya kufuta hii traumatic experience mioyoni na akilini mwenu ni kuliongelea kama mnavyofanya hapa.Huenda mnahitaji kuongea zaidi na zaidi ili liondoke kwenye system zenu. Inaweza kuwa ni kitu cha zamani sana lakini hakika njia hii inasaidia sana.Mimi binafsi nimewahi kuwa na experiences mbaya japo hazifanani na hizi zenu lakini baada ya kuzungumza nilipata ahueni sana. Hakuna mzigo mzito kama ule ulioubeba moyoni.
     
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