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The Relationship Golden Rule (Sheria za Mahusiano..)

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by VoiceOfReason, Sep 19, 2011.

  1. VoiceOfReason

    VoiceOfReason JF-Expert Member

    #1
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    ….. There are No Golden Rules……

    Kinachofaa kwa Hamisa.., hakifai kwa Mwajuma… (one size does not fit all....)

    Hata ule msemo wa “do onto others as you would have them do onto you” nadhani haufai…, the only recipe nadhani ni kufanyia wengine yale ambayo wenyewe wanataka kufanyiwa…

    Si busara kumbadilisha mtu kama wewe unavyotaka…, Kama kubadilika ni rahisi kwanini wewe usibadilike kuendana na yeye alivyo ?

    Uvumilivu: Mvumilie kama alivyo…, “Ukipenda ua Rose Penda na Miba yake…”

    Appreciate : Instead of complaining the rose bush is full of thorns, be happy the thorn bush has roses
     
  2. OTIS

    OTIS JF-Expert Member

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    Mwisho wa siku,mpende akupendae asiekupenda achana nae.
    OTIS.
     
  3. Smile

    Smile JF-Expert Member

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    .....................................
     
  4. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

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    kwa hiyo ni sawa na kusema ukitaka chukua,hutaki nenda?
     
  5. VoiceOfReason

    VoiceOfReason JF-Expert Member

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    Hapana mkuu mpende mtu jinsi alivyo na mabaya yake yote hata kama ni mvivu, muongu, mmbeya wewe mpende tu na hayo yote..., Mapenzi ni package.., wewe usipende mazuri yake tu na kusahau mabaya..., ukibeba beba yote na uvumilie mabaya
     
  6. VoiceOfReason

    VoiceOfReason JF-Expert Member

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    Na ukichukua chukua vyote..., mabaya na mazuri na vumilia mabaya..., na kinachofaa kwenye uhusiano wangu sio lazima kifae kwa mwingine.., maisha ya watu ni tofauti na wanapenda kufanya na kufanyiwa vitu tofauti
     
  7. Vin Diesel

    Vin Diesel JF Gold Member

    #7
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    Suala la mapenzi ni gumu...hakuna kitabu wala mtaalamu yoyote alie master hii kitu...
    Nijuavyo ni kwamba mapenzi hayana formula...ni hovyo hovyo style...
     
  8. Mr Rocky

    Mr Rocky JF-Expert Member

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    Mhhh VOR asante sana kwa haya
    Ila je nani yuko tayari kufanya hayo
    watu wapo kulalamika tuu na kurushiana maneno bila hata kujali kama hicho alichokifanya it was by mistake au vipi
    Ni wachache wanasema hayo na kukubali kuyatenda
     
  9. VoiceOfReason

    VoiceOfReason JF-Expert Member

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    Kweli mkuu wengi wetu huwa tunajua cha kufanya ni nini lakini ugumu ni kwenye kufanya....,
    Easier Said than Done.....
     
  10. Mr Rocky

    Mr Rocky JF-Expert Member

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    We can make that step mkuu na kuaaapreciate what ever done na hawa wenzetu na kuwasifia hata kama kachemsha mpe sifa yake na siku nyingine mwambie wazi u have the ability to do more than that instead of kumwambia " we mzembe kweli hata hili umeshindwa"
    Au unaishia kusema we kila kitu huwezi sijui unaweza nini
    Uvumilivu nayo ni issue nyingine mkuu ambapo kwetu sisi au hata kwako kuvumilia inakuwa ni issue
     
  11. SMU

    SMU JF-Expert Member

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    Mimi naamini ipo misingi na kuna vitu vya ziada. Misingi kwa sehemu kubwa ni almost universal...kwa sababu ukitizama mahusiano mengi yenye matatizo unaweza kuona kuna baadhi ya vitu kadhaa vinajurudia tena na tena kama chanzo/sehemu ya matatizo hayo. Hata hapa JF ukijaribu kutizama visa na mikasa ya kimahusiano inayoletwa na members, kwa sehemu kubwa utaona kuna vitu vinajirudia rudia.
     
  12. s

    shalis JF-Expert Member

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    hakuna mapenzi ya uvumilivu
    at the time unaumia
    hapa ni full love ukihisi unaonewa sema
    nikihisi naonewa nasema
    kama mtu akishidwa kubadilika at the time frame basi
    divorce na ifuate mkondo wake

    maaana watu wegi wanadanganywa na kauli uvumilivu
    wengi wanakufa sababu ni uvumilivu kama angelichukua hatua
    may be angelikuwa salama....
     
  13. Freema Agyeman

    Freema Agyeman JF-Expert Member

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    Umepevuka sasa.
     
  14. c

    charndams JF-Expert Member

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    mimi. hakuna cha ajabu hapo bali ukweli mtupu
     
  15. c

    charndams JF-Expert Member

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    matusi haya jamani! eti voiceof reasonbado unajadili upatikanaji wa maji na sukari pamoja na kukosa umeme kuwa janga la Taifa ilihali Nchi imejitawala kwa Miaka 50? hahahaha.
     
  16. VoiceOfReason

    VoiceOfReason JF-Expert Member

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    Mkuu kupigwa, au abuse yoyote mental au physical ni kweli haewezi kuvumilika na ni bora kuondoka mapema kuliko kuendela kukaa kwenye matatizo na kuumia...,

    Uvumilivu ninaoongelea ni vitu minor na ambavyo unaweza ukavifumbia macho.., mfano kama unachua mpenzi wako mvivu, mnaweza kutafuta msaidizi wa kazi; kama unajua hapendi kupika, basi unatafuta way around it.., Ni kwamba hakuna mtu ambae hana dosari na ni vema kuzoea dosari ulizonazo na kuendelea kuishi nazo kuliko kutafuta asie na dosari..., sababu hawezi kupatikana...!!
     
  17. VoiceOfReason

    VoiceOfReason JF-Expert Member

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    Kwahiyo mkuu unaniambia kwamba kuna a "A Ready Made Solution for All Problems.." ; au ni uvumilivu, kuheshimiana na kupendana ndio silaha pekee....

    Na je ni kweli hakuna familia zenye matatizo au ni kwamba kila relation ina matatizo ila watu wanayavumilia.....? Na je formula itakayoweka sawa matatizo ya familia ya A itafanya kazi kwenye familia ya B...?, mfano Honesty is the best Policy..., je ni kweli kwa kila couples au ni tofauti katika couple na couple kulingana na utofauti wao wa wivu...!
     
  18. SMU

    SMU JF-Expert Member

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    No hakuna suluhisho moja kwa kila tatizo hata kama linafanana kutoka couple moja kwenda nyingine. Ninachojaribu kusema, kama msingi mmojawapo ni 'kuheshimiana' (au kupenda etc) hii ina apply kwa realationship nyingi (almost universal)....kunaweza kuwa na tofauti za hapa na pale katika implementation kutoka couple moja kwenda nyingine lakini zote zina msingi mmoja.

    Jaribu kutizima couple kadhaa ambazo zina matatizo, most likely utakuta chanzo ni kukosekana kwa heshima (au misingi mingine) ingawa hilo linaweza kuji manifest kwa namna tofauti tofauti. So unafanya (solution) nini ili heshima irudi/iwepo obvious itakuwa tofauti kutoka couple moja kwenda nyingine.
     
  19. VoiceOfReason

    VoiceOfReason JF-Expert Member

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    Ni kweli heshima ni muhimu katika maisha ya kila siku...; lakini Je unaweza kumbadilisha mtu tabia ukubwani (you cant teach an old dog new tricks..) kama amezoea kuwakosea watu heshima sidhani kama atabadilika kwako na kama alikuwa na heshima zamani alafu ikapotea nadhani kutakuwa na kitu kilichopelekea ikawa hivyo...

    Kuhusu upendo / kupenda nimeshaona watu wengi tu wanapendana sana tu lakini wanashindwa kukaa pamoja, kwahiyo sio mara zote watu kuachana ni kukosa upendo au kupenda...., wengine hawajazoea kuishi na watu wenyewe ni ile freedom na independence yao yaani wakikaa na watu tu ni kukwaluzana na wana principles ngumu ambazo usipozisoma huwezi kukaa nao
     
  20. Husninyo

    Husninyo JF-Expert Member

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    <br />
    <br />
    kweli kabisa.
     
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