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Should I tell my ex that I slept with her mum?

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Rutashubanyuma, Jan 19, 2011.

  1. Rutashubanyuma

    Rutashubanyuma JF-Expert Member

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    Should I tell my ex that I slept with her mum?

    19/01/2011


    Dear Coleen,

    I'm a 25-year-old lad and two weeks ago I ended up in bed with my ex-girlfriend's mum, who's 45.
    To be honest, it had probably been coming for a while. I'd always thought her mum was attractive and we got on well whenever I went round there to pick up my girlfriend.

    Looking back, I suppose we used to flirt. There would usually be some cheeky banter in the kitchen when she made me a sandwich and we had a laugh. It's hard to think of her as a mum as she looks so young and joins in on chats about music, films or clothes.

    I split up with my girlfriend about a month ago, but I called round recently to pick up my Xbox when I knew she was away for the weekend with her mates.

    Her mum invited me to stay for lunch and one thing led to another. We had a bottle of wine and a couple of beers and just stared kissing. It seemed natural.

    She led me upstairs and we had sex twice – she was amazing and I couldn't get enough of her. I left the next morning in case my ex paid her a visit.

    Now I don't know what to do. I can't stop thinking about that day and we've texted each other, saying how great it was and that we should meet again soon. She's divorced and single and I'm free, too, but my ex would go ballistic if we started seeing each other and it'd cause problems for her and her mum, too.

    What do you think we should do – should we tell my ex?

    Coleen says..

    Well, what I think you should do and what you're probably going to do are two different things! You only split up with her daughter a month ago – if you confess, it'll open a can of worms and fireworks will go off. You have to ask yourself if this woman is worth going though all of that for.

    As a mother, I wouldn't lose my daughter for anyone. If my mum had done that to me, I'd never have got over it. I think it's a big betrayal on the part of your ex's mum – she should have been thinking about her daughter first. Instead, she's caught up in a big ego trip, having sex with a much younger guy. But you're her daughter's ex and as far as I'm concerned you're a no-go area.

    Sometimes you can't have what you want as it affects the lives of others – and this is one of them. Have you stopped to think the sexual attraction here could be all about the fact your ex's mum is a no-go area? It's like forbidden fruit. But you have to be mature enough to see that and neither of you are.

    You're obviously concerned about *upsetting your ex and you're feeling the guilt because you know she'll be hurt. That should tell you all you need to know.

    If this relationship carries on and you think it's something that could last, consider telling your ex, but I don't think you're there yet. At the moment, this seems like a fantasy for you and an ego trip for your ex's mother. I just hope it's worth it.


     
  2. Rutashubanyuma

    Rutashubanyuma JF-Expert Member

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    Jibu hili limeenda shule........................................tena sana...................
     
  3. Rose1980

    Rose1980 JF-Expert Member

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    :frusty::frusty:
     
  4. Rutashubanyuma

    Rutashubanyuma JF-Expert Member

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    Kizunguzungu kinatoka wapi..................................ni umombo ndiyo unakupa homa..................au ujumbe ni mzito mno unahitaji nikutafunie zaidi.................au vipi? fafanua............................
     
  5. VoiceOfReason

    VoiceOfReason JF-Expert Member

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    shouldn't have done the Former......, Dont dare do the Latter.....

    You have done one damage already now you will be doing another by destroying mother daughter relationship......., Infact you are menace to society
     
  6. M

    MONTESQUIEU JF-Expert Member

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    Mh haya nayo makubwa, hawa wamama wa wapi?
     
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