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Kwanini afanye hivyo?

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by shoshte, Jun 20, 2011.

  1. s

    shoshte Senior Member

    #1
    Jun 20, 2011
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    Poleni kwa majukumu ya kila siku kuna jamaangu anafanya kazi mbali na nyumbani, ana mke na watoto wawili sasa yeye anafanya kazi sehemu anapewa hela ya kujikimu so mshahara unatumbukizwa kwenye account direct ambako yeye hana access na ile acc kwani yupo nji nyingine so mke ndo mwenye access.

    Jamaa amekuwa akimuuliza mke wake matumizi ya hela mke anakuwa mbogo baadae mke kamwambia jamaa kuwa hela yote kadraw na akiulizwa kafanyia nini hasemi baadae jamaa kamua kuchukua mshiko palepale kazini mke anaanza kulalamika watoto wanateseka sasa jamaa kamua kumtimua mama na watoto wanakaa kwa mamake je kwanini sometimes wanawakewanakuwa hivi na je jamaa alichofanya ni sawa????
     
  2. kisukari

    kisukari JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Jun 20, 2011
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    jamani ndoa ina commitment nyingi,mayabe huyo mke ana makosa ya kutumbua hela lakini na huyo bwana nae ana makosa yake.kumtimua mke sio suluhisho,suluhisho wote wakae chini,huyo husband,akae amueleweshe huyo mke maisha yalivyo,na matumizi yawe kulingana na uwezo wao wa kimaisha.hiyo sio sababu nzito ya kumtimua mke.
     
  3. s

    shoshte Senior Member

    #3
    Jun 20, 2011
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    Ni kweli hapo nakubaliana nawewe ila sasa kila jamaa akigusia swala la hela mama anakuwa mkali na hataki kutoa maelezo kuusiana na matumizi alikuwa anatuma hela kwa sababu yye yuko mbali ssa hela ikawa inatumbukizwa kwenye acc moja kwa moja na yeye hana access na acc ni mke tu
     
  4. Aisha Adam

    Aisha Adam JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Jun 20, 2011
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    Huyo mama alikuwa natamaa zisizokuwa za msingi ndizo zilizosababisha ndoa yake kuvunjikana huyo baba kwangu mimi hajafanya maamuzi sahihi kitu ambacho angefanya angukuwa ananunua vitu vyote vya ndani akapeleka hapo nyumbani, bora angewaeleza wazazi wake wakamkanya kabla hajachukua maamuzi ya kumtimua
     
  5. Mwanakili90

    Mwanakili90 JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Jun 20, 2011
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    hahahaha jamani.
    Wanawake na maendeleo wafanye kazi wasonge mbele,yeleleyelele wanawake.................................
    Huyu mama aliimba vizuri,sasa huyu anayekua mbogo kwa pesa za KUPEWA sijui anataka aulizwe na nani? Napita tu ndo mana tunasema wanawake wengine ni PASUA KICHWA.
     
  6. LD

    LD JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Jun 20, 2011
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    Mwingine asote hela ipatikane, mwingine atumie tu, halafu hataki kuulizwa/kuhojiwa kama vile kazichuma yeye? Khaa, asitudhalilishe naye huyu awe mstaarabu bana. Mi natamani kuhoji hata sh mia iliyobaki kwenye mboga imefanyia nini, si zaidi hizo?
     
  7. Elia

    Elia JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Jun 20, 2011
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    Ilitakiwa apeleke watoto bording na mywife wake ampeleke akaishi na wifi zake mabaunsa baunsa atajifunza matumizi
     
  8. Gaga

    Gaga JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Jun 20, 2011
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    Kwani huyo mama hafanyi kazi? yaani mume anakupa access ya account yake then unakuwa mkali?? kwa pesa yake?? jamaa akae nae chini amweleweshe umuhimu wa matumizi mazuri ya pesa, coz kumwacha kwa sababu hii sio suluhisho
     
  9. charger

    charger JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Jun 20, 2011
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    Wengine inakuwaga ni ushamba tu haamini kama ana access na hizo hela mpaka anakuwa limbukeni,ila kumtimua naona ilikuwa sio sahihi amewanyima haki watoto pia kwa kukosa malezi na upendo wa wazazi.Ange jaribu njia nyingine b4 that
     
  10. s

    shoshte Senior Member

    #10
    Jun 21, 2011
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    mke hafanyi kazi jamaa alifungua joint account sasa yeye yuko ughaibuni na bank ipo home ndo maana mke ndo mwenye access na account alijaribu kumwonya mara kibao mwanamke hakawa hataki kuelewa yakamfika shingoni kaona bora ndoa ife kuliko kuishi kwa mateso
     
  11. s

    shoshte Senior Member

    #11
    Jun 21, 2011
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    shida kununua vitu hasingeweza kwani yeye anapiga box ughaibuni mke ndo yupo home kila akielekezwa anaona jamaa mambo fulani na akamtamkia live kuwa akienda likizo hatamkuta
     
  12. Tulizo

    Tulizo JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Jun 21, 2011
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    Nakubaliana nawe Kisukari.. Ila ningependa kuongeza ya kuwa huyo jamaa hakutenda haki kwani kuna uwezekano huyo Mama hakutumia hela vibaya ila ali-extend matumizi kwa familia yake.. Afrika hatuwezi kuepuka extended families, na mambo yanakuwa magumu hasa kwa kina Mama wasiofanya kazi kwani wanapata ugumu ni jinsi gani ya kusaidia familia zao ili hali wanategemea mshahara wa baba kwa kila kitu.. Na pia kwa sababu baba hakuwepo hivyo Mama aliweza kuongeza msaada ..na labda kutegemea na wingi wa matatizo katika familia yake Mama akajisahau kufikiria Nyumba yake binafsi kwani damu nzito kuliko Maji.. Kwa hili niko Neutral kwani upande mmoja ni vizuri tukiwa na uwezo tuka-extend msaada..lakini isiwe too much hadi tunaua familia zetu binafsi.. Lakini kuna pia hili tatizo la nidhamu ya woga.. yaani mke na mume hawaongei nkwa mapana..hapa inabidi familia ziongee na kupanga mikakati ya kusaidia familia zote mbili bila kuwa na negative impact kwenye maendeleo ya familia yenu binafsi..All in all, on the other side, sinto- rule out possibility ya kwamba Mama alitumbua hela na mashost..lakini hii ni rahisi kujua kwani hakuna siri mtaani..

    In conclusion.. Sikubaliani na jamaa kumtimua mke wake kwani hilo ni upuuzi.. Inabidi jamaa akae na wife na kuongea nae kwa kirefu.. Inabidi amu-encourage kutoa duku duku lake kwa kiasi gani wasaidiane katika kudhamini familia zote mbili lakini yote yakiwa ndani ya uwezo wao..Jamaa ajitahidi ku-eliminate nidhamu ya woga ya mke..ambayo kuna uwezekano inachangiwa na kutokuwa na kazi..Jamaa awe mvumilivu kupata facts na sio umbeya.. Jamaa lazima ajue ni rahisi kurekebisha mke .lakini ni kazi kubwa .kutafuta mke mpya..kwani first decision is always right!
     
  13. Gagurito

    Gagurito JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Jun 21, 2011
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    wanawake wapuuzi sana sometimes, ktk masuala ya hela km mwanamke si mfanyakazi ujinga huwazidi. Atimue then amnyanganye ATM zote! watoto awachukue mpaka mama yao atakapo jirekebisha!
     
  14. s

    shoshte Senior Member

    #14
    Jun 21, 2011
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    mi naona hapo saw kwamba ampe ka likizo kafupi ajirekebishe watoto wakae kwa bibi mpaka ajifunze matumizi
     
  15. Gaga

    Gaga JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Jun 21, 2011
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    Likizo imekuwa kazi hiyo kuolewa
     
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