Kaazi kwelikweli... wadau tuelimishane hapa....(Asante New Vision online) I WANT to meet that guy who still yearns for the housewife of yore! She will take off your shoes, mop your floor, iron your shirts and cook your food. However, when it comes to paying bills, helping you with office work, looking after the home or be a worthy partner during outings with friends, you will wish you were your neighbour. But you are not. Your neighbour is a strategist who sacrifices comfort for companionship. He knows a stay-at-home, school drop-out wife cannot sustain an interesting conversation, be classy when visitors come or accompany him to corporate functions. And he needs a companion to walk this life with. So he gets one who fulfils him. And he is a winner. Modern marriage is a two-way street. Ive been working since I graduated. I know the hardships of earning, appreciate budgeting, have many contacts and know the value of companionship. I am an asset to my husband. However, he too has to add value to my person so that we can see how our totality helps our family. Interestingly, the high divorce rates are not caused by women becoming more aware of their rights. Rather, it is because men are refusing to relinquish their imperial stature of sitting on the couch as wives run themselves crazy in a bid to please them. Todays woman comes in as a companion and wants to develop to her fullest potential. Gone are the times when marriage was a prison for women. They were not allowed to discover the world. They were brought up in a strict manner at their fathers homes and marriage just transferred that authority to the husband. After the marriage, unlike the wife, the man continued to live like a bachelor; hanging out with friends, dancing all night long, freedom to date and spend money as he pleased. But the woman was expected to transform her life into an obedient wife who had to cut ties with friends, social preferences and personality. Today, women are more aware of their rights and they can look after themselves. The fear that they meet other men at work is not a gender issue. Even men meet girls at work. And they are weaker in resistance! A comfortable marriage is where we both earn run the home together, hire someone else to fold laundry and mop floors as we reserve energy to have some fun and save for the future. A good marriage is where both people are willing to keep on adapting to each other. You cannot be afraid of a companion you can plan with, speak to at the same wavelength, who can take care of the family in your absence and ease your financial burden.