Vipi Unatongoza

[Mwiba]

Naomba kuwauliza eti vipi unamtongoza mwanamke ? Kuna mbinu zozote au ustadi wa kuweza kuwin msichana mzuri mtaani au kazini ? Au kwenye diskoparty ila sio kwenye baa ingawa naweza pia kuelezewa ka kunahitajika kaufundi ?

 

[WomanOfSubstance]

Ama kweli!
JF inaweza kutoa hadi somo hili? I thought ni chemistry between 2 people!
Ngoja tusikie wataalamu watasema nini.

 

[BAK]

Ama kweli!
JF inaweza kutoa hadi somo hili? I thought ni chemistry between 2 people!
Ngoja tusikie wataalamu watasema nini.

Ha ha ha Wataalamu wa kutongoza wa JF Chemistry ni muhimu lakini kimwana hakivutiki na chemistry iliyopo kati yenu inabidi utembeze lugha, ulonge ili kimwana kikuelewe unasema nini. Ngoja tusubiri watalaamu katika nyanja hizi

 

[WomanOfSubstance]

mambo ya " unayempenda hakupendi... usiyempenda anakuganda kama luba".... hapo sasa... kweli yahitaji mbinu za ziada hadi ndege aingie tunduni.

 

[Nyani Ngabu]

Mwiba nani huyo anayekupa shida? Hebu mlengeshe kwangu aone....maana sumu nitakazotema atakuwa hana ujanja

 

[Masanilo]

Mwambie I love you, can I kiss ur ass!

 

[WomanOfSubstance]

Mwambie I love you, can I kiss ur ass!

thats too banale!

 

[BAK]

Mwambie I love you, can I kiss ur ass!

Hmmm! Kwa lugha yetu ya Taifa sijui kama ataingia tunduni ukilonga namna hiyo , hata kwa lugha ya mama atatimua mbio kali sana na kukuachia vumbi

 

[Consultant]

Mkabidhi key ya Mark II mpya, then huhitaji kuongea zaidi

 

[BAK]

Mkabidhi key ya Mark II mpya, then huhitaji kuongea zaidi

Hmmm! Je, kama huna uwezo huo ndiyo unamkabidhi nini!?

 

[Sonara]

Ha ha ha Wataalamu wa kutongoza wa JF Chemistry ni muhimu lakini kimwana hakivutiki na chemistry iliyopo kati yenu inabidi utembeze lugha, ulonge ili kimwana kikuelewe unasema nini. Ngoja tusubiri watalaamu katika nyanja hizi

sasa hii ya mkununulia Beer msichana na kuomba muondoke wote inahisabika kuwa moja ya matongozaji ?

 

[Mbu]

...'mwiba huo', ...inaonekana hata 'wataalamu' wenyewe midomo imejaa gundi! ...kutongoza mchezo?!

 

[Consultant]

BAK,

Kama huna kitu ndo issue. Madem nowadays wameshtuka na si enzi zile za 47, enzi za I love you kuliko ninavyojipenda, sijui usiku silali, nakuota wewe, etc. Ni wizi mtupu sasa

Ngoja tusubiri wataalamu wa fani hii walete nyimbo

 

[Mbu]

...Ngoja tusikie wataalamu watasema nini.

... Ngoja tusubiri watalaamu katika nyanja hizi

...Ngoja tusubiri wataalamu wa fani hii walete nyimbo

...hakuna "mtaalamu" hapa jamani eeeeh "walozoea vya kunyonga, vya kuchinja wataviweza wapi?!"

mjibuni Ab-Tichaz naye hapa; https://www.jamiiforums.com/mahusiano-mapenzi-urafiki/27105-dating-modern-woman.html

 

[BAK]

BAK,

Kama huna kitu ndo issue. Madem nowadays wameshtuka na si enzi zile za 47, enzi za I love you kuliko ninavyojipenda, sijui usiku silali, nakuota wewe, etc. Ni wizi mtupu sasa

Ngoja tusubiri wataalamu wa fani hii walete nyimbo

sili silali kwa kukufikiri nakuota wewe usiku kucha natafuta mganga wa kunitibu 'maradhi' hajapatikana. Hmmm! naona haya yatakuwa ni marazi na siyo 'maradhi'

 

[Outlier]

Naomba kuwauliza eti vipi unamtongoza mwanamke ? Kuna mbinu zozote au ustadi wa kuweza kuwin msichana mzuri mtaani au kazini ? Au kwenye diskoparty ila sio kwenye baa ingawa naweza pia kuelezewa ka kunahitajika kaufundi ?

Mtaani na kazini simple (itakuchukua kama mwezi mmoja hivi kama hakuna chemistry)
*Jitambulishe ili mfahamiane
*Hakikisha mnaonana mara nyingi (unajidai accidendally kumbe ni mbinu zako)
*Msemeshe kila mkionana na uwe unamsifia
*Usichukulie mambo serious sana, inabidi ufanye jitihada kuwe kama na "kautani flani" kati yako na yeye
*Kisha "unamtania" (unajidai utani, kumbe moyoni uko serious) unataka kumpeleka lunch, outing ama kitu kama hicho
*Hapo mtakuwa kwenye kubadilishana namba za simu
*Mpige message mara kwa mara, kama anajibu (angalia usitume message nyingi kama hajibu)
*mpige vizawadi vya mara kwa mara - hata chewing gum au pipi! (Kutongoza sometimes inabidi ujifanye Mseng.e ili ufanikiwe). lol
*Akikubali outing, una-introduce issue kuwa ulishakufa kwake bado kuoza tu
*Endelea kuwa karibu naye na kumshawishi.
*Outing ya pili mpitie kwako kabla hujamrudisha home kwake, jidai kuna kitu muhimu lazima u-drop au ufanye; akiingia ndani - usifanye kosa, mademu bongo sitaki nataka na first time inaweza ikawa hivyo, akigoma sana unaacha, hatari ni kwamba kama hajawa impressed na unapoishi na ukamkosakosa ndio imetoka, kwa hiyo juu yako hapo.
*Etimated time kwa mambo yote haya, 1 month.
*NB: Demu yeyote anachukulika (awe maskini, tajiri, mrembo, msomi, whatever), ni ku-persist tu mpaka a-give in.

Kwenye party - ni kujitambulisha, kupiga stori kidogo na kujitahidi upate namba ya simu utaendelea baada ya hapo; otherwise demu awe mapepe na wewe ujidai pedejee.

Club kabisaaa, ndio hakuna kingine zaidi ya hela yako ya vinywaji na kuonyesha upedejee!

Nadhani umepata mwanga kidogo ... lol

 

[X-PASTER]

Naomba kuwauliza eti vipi unamtongoza mwanamke ? Kuna mbinu zozote au ustadi wa kuweza kuwin msichana mzuri mtaani au kazini ? Au kwenye diskoparty ila sio kwenye baa ingawa naweza pia kuelezewa ka kunahitajika kaufundi ?

Kama binti mnafanya naye kazi... ni rahisi sana.

Unaweza kutumia mbinu hii kama wewe ni domo zege. Mwandikie official love letter kwa namna hii:

To

Ms xyz
Secretary to....

Sub: Offer of love!

Dearest Ms Jxyz,

I am very happy to inform you that I have fallen in Love with you since the .....(date) of .....( Month).

With reference to the meeting held between us on the .....(date) of .....( Month). At (time), I would like to present myself as a prospective lover.

Our love affair would be on probation for a period of three months and depending on compatibility, would be made permanent.

Of course, upon completion of probation, there will be continuous on the job training and performance appraisal schemes leading up to promotion from lover to spouse.

The expenses incurred for coffee and entertainment would initially be shared equally between us. Later, based on your performance, I might take up a larger share of the expenses.

However I am broad minded enough to be taken care of, on your expense account.

I request you to kindly respond within 30 days of receiving this letter, failing which, this offer would be cancelled without further notice and I shall be considering someone else.

I would be happy, if you could forward this letter to your sister, if you do not wish to take up this offer.

Wish you all the best!

Thanking you in anticipation,

Yours sincerely,
Mwiba (Your title)

Hapa binti hata kama ni Katibu Muktasari wa Big Boss hapo kazini na ukizingatia kuwa bado mseja yaani signorina... Lazima hataendesha gari kwa gear nambari moja kwa 20 km... au atatafuta barabara yenye foleni ili apate kukusikiliza.

Au bofya hapa:Mahusiano

 

[BAK]

*mpige vizawadi vya mara kwa mara - hata chewing gum au pipi! (Kutongoza sometimes inabidi ujifanye Mseng.e ili ufanikiwe). lol
... lol

Naomba ufafanuzi wa uliyoyaandika hapo juu. Unafanya nini ili uonekane baradhuli ashakum si matusi ms****

 

[Nangetwa]

mambo ya mapenzi hayana formula na jinsi ya kumtongoza mtu inategemea mtu na mtu na jinsi unavyoanza na kuwa consistent na maneno yako. You need to take time to learn somebody, what does she like and dislike, what inspire her, etc. sio wanawake wote wanapenda kutongozewa katika candle light atmosphere na sio wote wanapenda kujishebedua (brag) kwa mwanaume. so u need to take time and strategize ur move. the key is be a bit honest of urself and consistent of words.

 

[Outlier]

Naomba ufafanuzi wa uliyoyaandika hapo juu. Unafanya nini ili uonekane baradhuli ashakum si matusi ms****

Mambo ya kumpelekea mtu pipi na chewing gum ndio use... wenyewe. lol..