Marufuku ya kuvuta Sigara hadharani Kenya. Smoking ban in swahili(Jokes)

[Kitia]

Hi,

Here is for a good laugh,

After public smoking was banned in Kenya , each town clerk was assigned
the duty of posting notices in Kiswahili to that effect.

See how different councils posted this advert: Other councils are still working on theirs.......

The Coast Town Clerk wrote:

Uvutaji wa sigara umepigwa marufuku kuanzia leo.Watakaopatikana wakikiuka
amri hii wataadhibiwa kwa mujibu wa sheria. Nyote zingatieni.

The Kiambu Town Clerk:

Wanyuanji wa thigara washunge sana . Unyuanji wa thigara bere ya watu hata huko ije umefigwa marufuku na kaju kuanjia reo.

The Machakos Town Clerk:

Wavulutanji tusikala wasunge sana. Sasa kuvuluta tusikala ni maluvuku na kanzu ya Masaku itawasukulia atua kuvwa sana.

The Kisumu Town Clerk:

Atenson Plis!!! Mifuto sgara adharani sasa omepigwa marofuku. Okipaatwa ibiro yie Kodiaga! Apana furuta Plis!!

Wajir Town Clerk:
Habana iko buruta sigara. Yeye lishapigwa marufuk na sisi tagaamata mutu
bhahala yaghe kiburuta.

Kericho Town Clerk:

Gutoga leo gugunywa na gufuruta sigara sisi nagshagataasa. Haguna!! Charipu wee taona!!!

 

[Sanda Matuta]

Hi,

Here is for a good laugh,

After public smoking was banned in Kenya , each town clerk was assigned
the duty of posting notices in Kiswahili to that effect.

See how different councils posted this advert: Other councils are still working on theirs.......

The Coast Town Clerk wrote:

Uvutaji wa sigara umepigwa marufuku kuanzia leo.Watakaopatikana wakikiuka
amri hii wataadhibiwa kwa mujibu wa sheria. Nyote zingatieni.

The Kiambu Town Clerk:

Wanyuanji wa thigara washunge sana . Unyuanji wa thigara bere ya watu hata huko ije umefigwa marufuku na kaju kuanjia reo.

The Machakos Town Clerk:

Wavulutanji tusikala wasunge sana. Sasa kuvuluta tusikala ni maluvuku na kanzu ya Masaku itawasukulia atua kuvwa sana.

The Kisumu Town Clerk:

Atenson Plis!!! Mifuto sgara adharani sasa omepigwa marofuku. Okipaatwa ibiro yie Kodiaga! Apana furuta Plis!!

Wajir Town Clerk:
Habana iko buruta sigara. Yeye lishapigwa marufuk na sisi tagaamata mutu
bhahala yaghe kiburuta.

Kericho Town Clerk:

Gutoga leo gugunywa na gufuruta sigara sisi nagshagataasa. Haguna!! Charipu wee taona!!!

Tehe tehe................!
this is the best of them all...............Ha.............ha................ha.........

 

[Rodelite]

Hii kali kweli.....Mbavu sina....Yaani umewapatia kweli.
Ndio "sheng" hiyo au...!!

 

[Nyaralego]

Hii kali kweli.....Mbavu sina....Yaani umewapatia kweli.
Ndio "sheng" hiyo au...!!

No, sio "sheng" sheng is a mix of English & Kiswahili. its what we call mother tongue/vernacular interference

 

[Nyaralego]

Hi,

Here is for a good laugh,

After public smoking was banned in Kenya , each town clerk was assigned
the duty of posting notices in Kiswahili to that effect.

See how different councils posted this advert: Other councils are still working on theirs.......

The Coast Town Clerk wrote: Mombaas na pwani in general, kiswahili sanifu

Uvutaji wa sigara umepigwa marufuku kuanzia leo.Watakaopatikana wakikiuka
amri hii wataadhibiwa kwa mujibu wa sheria. Nyote zingatieni.



The Kiambu Town Clerk: This is with a kikuyu accent

Wanyuanji wa thigara washunge sana . Unyuanji wa thigara bere ya watu hata huko ije umefigwa marufuku na kaju kuanjia reo.


The Machakos Town Clerk: Kamba accent

Wavulutanji tusikala wasunge sana. Sasa kuvuluta tusikala ni maluvuku na kanzu ya Masaku itawasukulia atua kuvwa sana.


The Kisumu Town Clerk:Luo accent

Atenson Plis!!! Mifuto sgara adharani sasa omepigwa marofuku. Okipaatwa ibiro yie Kodiaga! Apana furuta Plis!!


Wajir Town Clerk:Somali accent
Habana iko buruta sigara. Yeye lishapigwa marufuk na sisi tagaamata mutu
bhahala yaghe kiburuta.


Kericho Town Clerk:Kalenjin accent
Gutoga leo gugunywa na gufuruta sigara sisi nagshagataasa. Haguna!! Charipu wee taona!!!

Think vitimbi...!!

 

[X-PASTER]

The Smoking Ban

After public smoking was banned in Kenya , each town clerk was assigned the duty of
posting notices in Kiswahili to that effect. See how different councils posted their
notice: Other councils are still working on theirs.......

The Mombasa Town Clerk
wrote: Uvutaji wa sigara umepigwa marufuku kuanzia leo.Watakaopatikana wakikiuka amri
hii wataadhibiwa kwa mujibu wa sheria. Nyote zingatieni.

The Kiambu Town Clerk:
Wanyuanji wa thigara washunge sana . Unyuanji wa thigara bere ya watu hata huko ije umefigwa marufuku na kaju kuanjia reo.

The Machakos Town Clerk:
Wavulutanji tusikala wasunge sana . Sasa kuvuluta tusikala ni maluvuku na kanzu ya Masaku itawasukulia atua kuvwa sana .

The Kisumu Town Clerk:
Atenson Plis!!! Mifuto sgara adharani sasa omepigwa marofuku. Okipaatwa, ibiro yie Kodiaga! Apana furuta Plis!!

Wajir Town Clerk:
Habana iko buruta sigara. Yeye lishapigwa marufuk na sisi
tagaamata mutu b hahala yaghe kiburuta.

Kericho Town Clerk:
Gutoga leo gugunywa na gufuruta sigara sisi nagshagataasa.
Haguna!! Charipu wee taona!!!

Kisii and Nyamira Town Clerk
Akuna kukunywa sigara hapa ndani na inche kuansia reo. Mutakaobatikana mutakura kiboko saa hiyo hiyo. Wote munaombua kujiatari sana.

Other Councils are still working on theirs...​

 

[Ng'wanza Madaso]

Ha ha ha ha mkuu umenivunja mbavu, halafu bado wanasema
KENYA'S NATIONAL LANGUAGE OFFICIALLY KNOW AS KISWAHILI

 

[Che Kalizozele]

Hii maneno imenichekesha sana,nina wakenya naishi nao hapa nitawapa watoe maoni yao.

 

[eRRy]

Utamsikia mkenya akisema" Wewe Husikii ninavyomwambia?" badala ya " wewe husikii ninavyokwambia?", wakenya bwana!

 

[Raimundo]

Ile ya Kisii and Nyamira Town nimeipaenda.

 

[ELNIN0]

After public smoking was banned in Kenya , each town clerk was assigned the duty of
posting notices in Kiswahili to that effect. See how different councils posted their
notice: Other councils are still working on theirs.......

The Mombasa Town Clerk
wrote: Uvutaji wa sigara umepigwa marufuku kuanzia leo.Watakaopatikana wakikiuka amri
hii wataadhibiwa kwa mujibu wa sheria. Nyote zingatieni.

The Kiambu Town Clerk:
Wanyuanji wa thigara washunge sana . Unyuanji wa thigara bere ya watu hata huko ije umefigwa marufuku na kaju kuanjia reo.

The Machakos Town Clerk:
Wavulutanji tusikala wasunge sana . Sasa kuvuluta tusikala ni maluvuku na kanzu ya Masaku itawasukulia atua kuvwa sana .

The Kisumu Town Clerk:
Atenson Plis!!! Mifuto sgara adharani sasa omepigwa marofuku. Okipaatwa, ibiro yie Kodiaga! Apana furuta Plis!!

Wajir Town Clerk:
Habana iko buruta sigara. Yeye lishapigwa marufuk na sisi
tagaamata mutu b hahala yaghe kiburuta.

Kericho Town Clerk:
Gutoga leo gugunywa na gufuruta sigara sisi nagshagataasa.
Haguna!! Charipu wee taona!!!

Kisii and Nyamira Town Clerk
Akuna kukunywa sigara hapa ndani na inche kuansia reo. Mutakaobatikana mutakura kiboko saa hiyo hiyo. Wote munaombua kujiatari sana.

Other Councils are still working on theirs...

 

[kamalfareed]

heheheheheheheheh.... KENYAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[mdau wetu]

NO Smoking in Swahili
I am sure some of you have come across this before. But just to celebrate being a proud Kenyan, the unity in diversity aspect of it, here it goes...........

After public smoking was banned in Kenya , each town clerk was assigned the duty of posting notices in Kiswahili to that effect. See how different councils posted their notice: Other councils are still working on theirs.......


The Mombasa Town Clerk wrote:
Uvutaji wa sigara umepigwa marufuku kuanzia leo.Watakaopatikana wakikiuka amri hii wataadhibiwa kwa mujibu wa sheria. Nyote zingatieni.


The Kiambu Town Clerk:
Wanyuanji wa thigara washuge sana. Unyuanji wa thigara bere ya watu hata huko ije umchijwa marufuku na kaju kuanjia reo.


The Machakos Town Clerk:
Wavulutanji tusikala wasunge sana . Sasa kuvuluta tusikala ni maluvuku na kanzu ya Masaku itawasukulia atua kuvwa sana .


The Kisumu Town Clerk:
Atenson Plis!!! Mifuto sgara adharani sasa omepigwa marofuku. Okipaatwa, ibiro yie Kodiaga! Apana furuta Plis!!


Wajir Town Clerk:
Habana iko buruta sigara. Yeye lishapigwa marufuk na sisi tagaamata mutu b hahala yaghe kiburuta.


Kericho Town Clerk:
Gutoga leo gugunywa na gufuruta sigara sisi nagshagataasa. Haguna!! Charipu wee taona!!!


Kisii and Nyamira Town Clerk
Akuna kukunywa sigara hapa ndani na inche kuansia reo. Mutakaobatikana mutakura kiboko saa hiyo hiyo. Wote munaombua kujiatari sana.


Other Councils are still working on theirs.......

 

[Inkoskaz]

Fun!! made my day!
tunasubiri Mtwara Town Council watoe tangazo lao

 

[Vinci]

Mombasa naona kiswahili chao kimenyooka...onyo linasomeka na kueleweka kwa kila anaefahamu kiswahili vizuri

 

[Askari Kanzu]

Kisii and Nyamira Town Clerk
Akuna kukunywa sigara hapa ndani na inche kuansia reo. Mutakaobatikana mutakura kiboko saa hiyo hiyo. Wote munaombua kujiatari sana.

Mimi kama nasikia hii ny'ang'au nasema hifyo nyoronyoro mi iko napiga kiboko mbaka yeye nanyoosa urimi yake!

 

[Globu]

Iko natembea kwa mateke(miguu).

 

[Husninyo]

Duh! Hizo zingine wanachapia au!

 

[Katavi]

Ukiondoa Mombasa, hao wengine huenda ni lugha za asili sio kiswahili!

 

[Obe]

Nimefurahi sana na ngoja tusbiri kwa jamaa zangu kina mura