Nini kinachowasukuma baadhi ya kinadada/kinamama kukubali kuwa 'nyumba ndogo'?

Tuko

JF-Expert Member
Jul 29, 2010
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Ndugu wanajamvi tumejadili sana katika jukwaa hili sababu zinazofanya baadhi ya wanaume wawe na 'nyumba ndogo', na baadhu ya wanawake wawe na 'vidumu'...

Naomba tugeuze hii sentensi upande wa pili, na kwa leo tujadili hili suala la mwanamke kukubali kuwa 'nyumba ndogo'. Kama tunavyojua ni suala ambalo linaongezeka katika jamii. Siku hizi tabia ya baadhi ya wanawake kuwa proud of being 'nyumba ndogo' inaongezeka. Baadhi ya wanawake wako proud kusema nimezaa na mme wa fulani, ninatoka na mme wa mtu, fulani mme wake hamna lolote nilishamwonja n.k. Simply mtu unaweza kudhani ni tamaa ya pesa na ugumu wa maisha, lakini mara nyingi tunashuhudia wanawake wenye pesa za kutosha kuendesha maisha yao, bado wako proud kutoka na wanaume wa wenzao.

Je, is all financial, is it fashion, is it love, is it for reproduction, is it sexual satisfaction, ...what is the reason/reasons? And what is your opinion?
 

mhondo

JF-Expert Member
Apr 23, 2011
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Wengine ni kwa sababu wanaona umri unaenda na hawaolewi na wanajiweza kimaisha.
 

Evarm

JF-Expert Member
Aug 30, 2010
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Hata mimi nashangaa sana sababu huku ninapofanyia kazi pia nimeyaona hayo. Hapa mkubwa wa hapa kazini "Director" katembea na secretary wake na amezaa naye watoto wawili hadi sasa, huyohuyo "Director" ana mke na watoto wanne kwa mke wake halali wa ndoa. Sielewi nini sababu ya huyu dada kumkubalia wakati anajua ana mke na watoto.Na secretary mwenyewe anaona fahari sana na huwa anajisifia kwa rafikize eti kazaa na director wa hapa!
Ni Mungu tu atusaidie
 

Tuko

JF-Expert Member
Jul 29, 2010
11,180
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Hata mimi nashangaa sana sababu huku ninapofanyia kazi pia nimeyaona hayo. Hapa mkubwa wa hapa kazini "Director" katembea na secretary wake na amezaa naye watoto wawili hadi sasa, huyohuyo "Director" ana mke na watoto wanne kwa mke wake halali wa ndoa. Sielewi nini sababu ya huyu dada kumkubalia wakati anajua ana mke na watoto.Na secretary mwenyewe anaona fahari sana na huwa anajisifia kwa rafikize eti kazaa na director wa hapa!
Ni Mungu tu atusaidie

Sijui niitaje hii hali, lakini mi nadhani kila mwanamke anapenda awe na mwanaume mwenye hadhi. Inapotokea hapatikani wa kwake peke yake, basi anakubali kushea wa mwenzake!
 

Mkatavimeo

JF-Expert Member
Jan 3, 2011
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Njaa ukiiwashia feni ndo matokeo yake hayo!! Wanawake wa sasaivi wanaendekeza sana njaa! Mpaka inakera! Ukimchekea kidogo tu anakusukumizia invoice fastaa! Loh!
 

Nemo

JF-Expert Member
Feb 22, 2011
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1,000
lower self-esteem. Kama unajiamini huwezi kukubali kuwa "the other woman"


Nyumba kubwa:
How would you rate the self-esteem of their counter parts aka the wives who, despite being aware of the existance of hizo nyumba ndogo wanang'ang'ana na ndoa?.........just curious :confused2:

Tuko:
I think some is for financial reasons, others is for love and/or reproduction. As for my opinion, personally the only benefit I can see, with me being nyumba ndogo God forbid ,will be having someone constistent and dependable in my life, that I can call upon and rely on, while at the same time being able to maintain my independence and individuality. My life has been about, me, myself and I for over 30+ years now, so I reckon it's going to be hard for me to have to change it, to be about some man, and his silly wants and/or needs full time as marriages demand!
 

ENZO

JF-Expert Member
Sep 30, 2010
4,103
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Njaa ukiiwashia feni ndo matokeo yake hayo!! Wanawake wa sasaivi wanaendekeza sana njaa! Mpaka inakera! Ukimchekea kidogo tu anakusukumizia invoice fastaa! Loh!

siyo njaa 2 hata kuwashwa kwao kunachangia!! cjui ni vyakula au ni nini?!! wanawake w cku hizi wanawashwa kishenzi ......
 

nyumba kubwa

JF-Expert Member
Oct 8, 2010
10,313
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Huyo nyumba kubwa anayejua existance ya nyumba ndogo na kukubali matokeo naye ana lower self esteem. Kwani na yeye ni the other woman tu.

Nyumba kubwa:
How would you rate the self-esteem of their counter parts aka the wives who, despite being aware of the existance of hizo nyumba ndogo wanang'ang'ana na ndoa?.........just curious :confused2:

Tuko:
I think some is for financial reasons, others is for love and/or reproduction. As for my opinion, personally the only benefit I can see, with me being nyumba ndogo God forbid ,will be having someone constistent and dependable in my life, that I can call upon and rely on, while at the same time being able to maintain my independence and individuality. My life has been about, me, myself and I for over 30+ years now, so I reckon it's going to be hard for me to have to change it, to be about some man, and his silly wants and/or needs full time as marriages demand!
 

nyumba kubwa

JF-Expert Member
Oct 8, 2010
10,313
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Hapo kwenye bold inategemea umeibua mwanaume gani. Ukiibua mume mwenye mke kama mimi your fantasy will rarely last for a month. Ila ukimpata wa wale wenye lower self esteem utaendelea kuji sevia kama ulivyopanga.
Nyumba kubwa:
How would you rate the self-esteem of their counter parts aka the wives who, despite being aware of the existance of hizo nyumba ndogo wanang'ang'ana na ndoa?.........just curious :confused2:

Tuko:
I think some is for financial reasons, others is for love and/or reproduction. As for my opinion, personally the only benefit I can see, with me being nyumba ndogo God forbid ,will be having someone constistent and dependable in my life, that I can call upon and rely on, while at the same time being able to maintain my independence and individuality. My life has been about, me, myself and I for over 30+ years now, so I reckon it's going to be hard for me to have to change it, to be about some man, and his silly wants and/or needs full time as marriages demand!
 

The Analyst

JF-Expert Member
Feb 26, 2011
464
250
Wanawake walio wengi, ama wazi wazi au kwa kificho, hutamani kuwa na bwana mwenye status ya juu zaidi kwa vigezo vya fedha, elimu, mwonekano, mvuto, madaraka, nk. Inapotokea ndoto zake zikawa kumpata mtu mwenye status "X+" halafu wewe ukaenda na status "X" anakuona kama hufai hivi. Mwisho wa siku anagundua mwenye "X+" hapatikani tena anaamua kusettle kwa mwenye status "X" bila kujali ameoa au la.
Huwezi kuamini, lakini wapo madada waliolazimika kuolewa na wanaume wenye status "X-" baada ya kuwaringia wenye "X" wakitarajia kuwapata wenye "X++" na wakiwa ndoani (walipoingia kwa kukata tamaa) wanajikuta wanawatamani sana wenye "X" na hivyo kuwapa kile walichowahi kuwanyima tena kwa nyodo za kutosha tu.
Jihadhari sana na mwanamke aliyekuwa anawaringia wahasibu wa halmashauri kwa kuamini mkuu wao ndo hadhi yake kifedha lakini cha ajabu anakuja kuolewa na mwalimu wa upe. Sometimes anaweza kuwa anagawa kwa watu wa hadhi aliyoiponda awali.
 

nyumba kubwa

JF-Expert Member
Oct 8, 2010
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Hii ina ukweli. Ukiwa too picky unadoda; unashtuka wa umri wako woote wameshaoa; unaamua kubanana na hao wa umri wako ambao ni waume za watu. Siamini kuwa kuna kudoda kwa bahati mbaya kama kupo ni kiasi kidogo sana mostly ni maringo na tabia mbaya.

Wanawake walio wengi, ama wazi wazi au kwa kificho, hutamani kuwa na bwana mwenye status ya juu zaidi kwa vigezo vya fedha, elimu, mwonekano, mvuto, madaraka, nk. Inapotokea ndoto zake zikawa kumpata mtu mwenye status "X+" halafu wewe ukaenda na status "X" anakuona kama hufai hivi. Mwisho wa siku anagundua mwenye "X+" hapatikani tena anaamua kusettle kwa mwenye status "X" bila kujali ameoa au la.
Huwezi kuamini, lakini wapo madada waliolazimika kuolewa na wanaume wenye status "X-" baada ya kuwaringia wenye "X" wakitarajia kuwapata wenye "X++" na wakiwa ndoani (walipoingia kwa kukata tamaa) wanajikuta wanawatamani sana wenye "X" na hivyo kuwapa kile walichowahi kuwanyima tena kwa nyodo za kutosha tu.
Jihadhari sana na mwanamke aliyekuwa anawaringia wahasibu wa halmashauri kwa kuamini mkuu wao ndo hadhi yake kifedha lakini cha ajabu anakuja kuolewa na mwalimu wa upe. Sometimes anaweza kuwa anagawa kwa watu wa hadhi aliyoiponda awali.
 

Ave Ave Maria

JF-Expert Member
Apr 22, 2011
10,742
0
Uaminifu umekwisha siku hizi kiasi kwamba watu wanakata tamaa wanaona bora kuwa nyumba ndogo ajue wazi kuwa anashare! Na kingine ni commitment, wengi wao hawataki kujicommit au kujifunga kama wanavyoita wenyewe so anaona solution ni kuwa nyumba ndogo kitu ambacho kitamruhusu kuwa na maamuzi yake mengine mradi tu ana mtoto/watoto na ana mtu wakumtimizia haja zake pale anapomhitaji (mume wa mtu)!!
 

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