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Bujibuji Simba Nyamaume

Bujibuji Simba Nyamaume

JF-Expert Member
Feb 4, 2009
74,738
155,424
BEST DIVORCE LETTER EVER
*****************************
Dear Wife,

I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m
leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you
for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These
last 2 weeks have been hell. ... Your boss called to
tell me that you quit your job today & that was the
last straw. Last week, you came home & didn’t
even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your
favourite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk
boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to
sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell
me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or
anything that connects us as husband & wife.
Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me
anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone.

Your Ex-Husband

P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are
moving away to West Virginia together! Have a
great life!

*****************

Dear Ex-Husband

Nothing has made my day more than receiving
your letter. It’s true you & I have been married for
7 years, although a good man is a far cry from
what you’ve been. I watch my soaps so much
because they drown out your constant whining &
griping Too bad that doesn’t work. I DID notice
when you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st
thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a
girl!’ Since my mother raised me not to say
anything if you can’t say something nice, I didn’t
comment. And when you cooked my favourite
meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY
SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago.
About those new silk boxers: I turned away from
you because the $49.99 price tag was still on
them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my
sister had just borrowed $50 from me that
morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we
could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10
million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets
to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone..
Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope
you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My
lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you
won’t get a dime from me. So take care.

Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!
 
Ha ha ha.. sikubali mie Bujibuji..
I's kidding my wife.. ddn't run away wit ur sis.. I's angry and i thought by sayin dat i'd run away with ur sis it could jolt back good memories we'd.. And it did..
 
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saudari said:
Hahahaaaaa!!!!!!!
You made my day Bujibuji.
Click to expand...

Imagine hii saudari..
I still loved you & felt we
could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10
million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets
to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone..
Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope
you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My
lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you
won't get a dime from me. So take care.
Click to expand...
 
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Paloma said:
would you leave my sis and come running back to me?!? eeenh sosoliso?
Click to expand...

Can't leave u for anythin in this lousy world babe.. By the way mbona umenikalia kimya hivi leo babe..? Yaani toka utoke kwa kinyozi umekuwa kimya.. Wanitisha babe wangu Paloma..
 
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sosoliso said:
Can't leave u for anythin in this lousy world babe.. By the way mbona umenikalia kimya hivi leo babe..? Yaani toka utoke kwa kinyozi umekuwa kimya.. Wanitisha babe wangu Paloma..
Click to expand...

oooh poleee kipenzyyyy............kinyozi kaniboa kweli yani amenipa adhabu ya kuvaa wigi......angalau ungeninyoa wewe mahabuba.ndio tabu ya kuwa mbali nawe....mweeeh!!! na mkoloni leo kanipa booonge la pini........hata zile soseji za yule mshkaji wako sijazila mpaka sasa!!! uko mzima lakini?!?!?
 
Paloma said:
oooh poleee kipenzyyyy............kinyozi kaniboa kweli yani amenipa adhabu ya kuvaa wigi......angalau ungeninyoa wewe mahabuba.ndio tabu ya kuwa mbali nawe....mweeeh!!! na mkoloni leo kanipa booonge la pini........hata zile soseji za yule mshkaji wako sijazila mpaka sasa!!! uko mzima lakini?!?!?
Click to expand...

Lol.. Huyo kinyozi atakuwa Erickb52 lazima.. Huyo m-jew wa Guatemala..? Halafu shem wangu Mentor sijamuona siku nyingi.. Yupo kweli..?
 
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Ghafla nimemkumbuka richard wa bba. Jinsi ambavyo alimess around na kuja kusamehewa na mkewe. Chezeiya lotto, ningeforge vyeti vya celebral malaria hadi akome. Ebooo!
 
sosoliso said:
Lol.. Huyo kinyozi atakuwa Erickb52 lazima.. Huyo m-jew wa Guatemala..? Halafu shem wangu Mentor sijamuona siku nyingi.. Yupo kweli..?
Click to expand...


aa wapi!! Erickb52 yeye ni fundi wa kurina asali....hawezi kunyoa kwa ustadi kama wewe. M-jew mhhhuuuu...............!!! Mentor sijui kafichwa na ladyfurahia wapi....anapewa juice ya machungwa.......
 
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Paloma said:
aa wapi!! Erickb52 yeye ni fundi wa kurina asali....hawezi kunyoa kwa ustadi kama wewe. M-jew mhhhuuuu...............!!! Mentor sijui kafichwa na ladyfurahia wapi....anapewa juice ya machungwa.......
Click to expand...

Ha ha ha.. kwa hiyo Erickb52 mara nyingi anakuwa Katavi huko akirina asali eeh..
Sasa huyu shem Mentor nae ananichanganya.. Ina maana Suzie aliachwa..? Huyu ladyfurahia nilijua ni rafiki yake tu wa kalam..
 
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King'asti said:
Ghafla nimemkumbuka richard wa bba. Jinsi ambavyo alimess around na kuja kusamehewa na mkewe. Chezeiya lotto, ningeforge vyeti vya celebral malaria hadi akome. Ebooo!
Click to expand...
hahahahahaha nimecheka kweli yaani ufoji vyeti
 
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