Kama una stress pitia hapa, usiache kutupia na wewe maneno yako

A Student Called his dad from school and he said
“Dad the situation at school is very critical if you don't send me money am going to commit suicide ”
Dad replied: Son the situation at home is also critical suicide approved”
 
A baby was born and minutes after he began to speak: I am going to live only 4 days, my Mother will die in 6 days and my Father will die in 15 days. 4 days later the boy died, after 6 days the Mother died. The Father was going crazy coz the next one will be him. He sold everything and spent the whole money. 15 days later their GateMan died.


Do not rush in solving problems
 
Ayo was in a Mathematics class, a class he never liked. The teacher was teaching Algebra that day and the aspect involved was somewhat easy. The teacher decided to evaluate the students' understanding of the topic.
TEACHER: Chibuzor, what is 2 x a?
CHIBUZOR: 2a Sir.
TEACHER: Good! Kansiime: What is 9 x t?KANSIIME: 9t Sir.
TEACHER: Good! Ayo, what is 4 x q?
AYO: F**k you sir!
 
Africa Justice System:

An Antelope was running like mad.

Elephant asked:-- Why are u running?

Antelope: They are arresting all goats.

Elephant: But you are not a goat?

Antelope: It will take at least 20 years to prove that in Africa!

The Elephant started running!
 
Have you ever been next to people who gossip so much that you're even scared of leaving them cause you know you will be the next topic?
 
Some females are so afraid of killing cockroaches but they already did 5 abortion. Sister, I don't understand what you're scared of.
 
If a girl dumps you because you don't have money and after you have made money... She comes back begging.My brother, Forgive her... Promise her marriage... Tell her family that you want to renovate their house. Remove their roof and DISAPPEAR
 
When a guy doesn't love you anymore you will hear things like ... baby why did you step on my shadow ? Do you want to injure my spirit ? It's over
 
My friend when your crush finally texts you and say "Hi how are you?" Do not waste time just reply "I'm single and you?" I repeat do not waste time.
 
Ladies imagine walking into heaven & the kids you aborted shouts. "Angel Gabriel..!! na she be that..! See her see her!!! Na she b dat!!!!
 
Because a girl replied u with "thanks love "
You now rush to inbox her. Now she snubbed u.
U see as u disgrace urself•
 
When a lady send you a message like: Can you do me a favour, then you go offline and starting driving aeroplane with your phone Airplane mode. God is Watching You Broda.
 
SHIMBA YA BUYENZE said:


I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

I do physical labour

I work at great depths

I plunge head first into everything I do

I do not get weekends off or public holidays

I work in a damp environment

I don't get paid overtime

I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation

I work in high temperatures

My work exposes me to contagious diseases

**** REPLY ****
Dear Penis,

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

You do not work 8 hours straight, You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods

You do not always follow the orders of the management team

You do not stay in your allocated position, and often visit other
restricted areas

You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working

You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift

You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing You'll retire well before reaching 65

You're unable to work double shifts

You sometimes leave your allocated position before you have completed the day's work.

And, if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and leaving the workplace carrying 2 suspicious looking bags.
Click to expand...
 
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