Hii Ilitokea ni hadithi ya kweli ilitokea Tanganyika masagati (Kishumundu)


JF-Expert Member
Oct 20, 2007
On Sunday the previous week after the service this is what happened!!

Pastor : On the public address. After the service I would like to meet Nancy in the office

Nancy in the office: Yes Pastor

Pastor: You are talented in singing and I love your singing and would like you bring out your talent by leading the church choir. Please come in Saturday for I will be away and continue training the choir

On Monday at a local shop Nancy meets Debora

Nancy : Do you remember on Sunday the pastor asked me to remain?

Debora: Yes yes yes

Nancy : He told me he loves me. Pliz do not tell any one else

Debora: Promise

On Tuesday Debora meets Magdalene in the market;

Debora: Do you remember on Sunday the pastor asked Nancy to remain behind

Magdalene: yes yes yea

Debora: Kuna MAMBO

Magdalene: what?

Debora: Pastor went to bed with Nancy

Magdalene : Oh Noooh!

Debora: Please do not tell any one else

Magdalene: Promise

On Tuesday on the way to women's merry go round meeting Magdalene meets Salome

Magdalene: do you remember on Sunday the pastor asked Nancy to remain behind

Salome: Oh Yea, KUNA NINI?

Magdalene: Pastor has been going to bed with Nancy and now she is pregnant

Salome: Nancy of all people and the way she pretends to be holier than thought, I can't believe it

Magdalene: You stay on I cannot believe it but, do not mention to any one else

Salome: Promise

On Wednesday on the way to a football match, Salome meets Adelina another church member

Salome: do you remember on Sunday the pastor asked Nancy to remain behind

Adelina: yes. What is wrong with that?

Salome: I don't care whether it is wrong or right but Nancy is the private wife of the pastor and she gave birth on birth on Monday to bouncing baby. I do not know the baby's sex yet.

Adelina: and Nancy used to look like she had added weight. Now I know. Remember the day she vomited in young girls meeting and the wife of the pastor took her to hospital. She should have known it was the co wife she was dealing with; and remember how the pastor prayed for Nancy; A whole 30 minutes as though God was deaf.

Salome: I just wanted you to know but do not tell any one else

Adelina: Promise

On Thursday Adelina at the bible study meets bible study group

Adelina: do you remember on Sunday the pastor asked Nancy to remain behind

All : Yes

Adelina: Do not say it was me for I will deny whether denial is sin or not

Angela: what is it? Even Peter denied Jesus and he went ahead to lead church when Jesus was gone to heaven

Elizabeth: Yes denial is not a blasphemy please tell us

Adelina: The known second wife of pastor Nancy gave birth to twins on Wednesday and because they were immature and there was no incubator, they unfortunately died

All: God have mercy on our church. We are doomed .

Mosha: Nancy of all people. And the way I asked her hand in marriage and she turned me down saying she was still waiting for the lords voice. Kumbe she was waiting for the pastors voice. Aki ya Mungu she is the axis of evil in our church

Blandina: Now you can consider me since Nancy has a husband

Mosha : This is not a joking matter

Adelina : Hey lets not fight but do not mention my name

All : Promise.

On Friday in the market place Blandina meets the church chairmanChairman: Praise God Blandina

Blandina : ah ah praise the Lord chairman

Chairman : why do you laugh Blandina. Have you backslidden or do I have an issue?

Blandina: do you remember on Sunday the pastor asked Nancy to remain behind

Chairman: Yes

Blandina: Am ashamed

Chairman: with what, who and why?

Blandina : You church leaders think we are stupid

Chairman: I do not understand you yet

Blandina: You mean you do not know that the pastor has a whole group of girl friends in the church and a number of wives. I also think you are the same since you are friends . In fact Nancy is one of them and she gave birth yesterday to still born triplets who were secretly taken to the rural area of the pastor and burial will be on Monday not to attract public attention.

Chairman : Shetani ASHINDWE! No wonder the pastor never invited me when he met Nancy

Blandina : I only wanted you to know but do not tell anybody

Chairman Promise

On Saturday at the couples fellowship chairman meet all

Chairman: I hope you understand why the pastor could not make it to today fellowship

All : No, is anything wrong?

Chairman: I Ihope our church is not coming to an end. You know the bible says it all. In the last days there will be men who will resemble the people of the cloth but they will deny the real power of god.

Msengi : Wacha kutuzungusha. We are not babies

Chairman : O.K. The pastor is mourning the untimely death of four kids born by his two girl friends at the same time but in different parts of the village; twins each; who died for varied reasons. It is even being suspected it was abortions which went wrong and the police are holding the two girls and the midwife involved for further investigations. Since all of them are our church members, I hope the name of the pastor will not be mentioned in the fracas.

Mushi : So the pastor has gone to hiding and that is why he is not here today. I swear atanirudishia zile sadaka nimetoa kanisani since I joined the church.

Mosha : Mimi siendi nyumbani, napita kwake nichukue advace refund kabla queue haija kuwa ndefu sana

All: Let us come mapema kesho tujue mwanzo na mwelekeo wa haya mambo.

On Sunday at 6.00 am the church is full

Chairman : Praise and worship choruses please

All: let us sing "all the things done under the bed shall be broadcast at the hill top"

Pastor : Still in his house; My wife I think we need to hurry up for the revival times have kicked in. I cannot believe the church is full at six o'clock in the morning. Even some people are worshipping from outside. Our prayers are answered. Praise be to GOD

Chairman: I know he is scared let me bring him in

All : Oh yeah!

Pastor: what is the chairman talking about? Let me go and check

All: KANAJILETA with louder and louder singing "Yote yawezekana kwa imani.."

Chairman: Every one quiet! This is the moment of truth

Pastor: Yes the moment when the devil must be ashamed is here and now

All : Oh yes, say that again and again and again pastor

Pastor : Let us sing the chorus: '..every knee shall bow and every tongue confess..'

All : Confess first before we sing and bow to pray for you

Chairman: Pastor vipi huko na matanga ya extended familia yako kesho?

Pastor : who died and when?

All : Wacha kujifanya!!! !!!!

Chairman: oh yes One is your Nancy 's twins

Pastor, and wife plus Nancy fainted
Swali la udakuu huu mimi na wewe tunaleta hapa JF habari za midomoni kama ilivyo kwenye udaku huu. Tafakari

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