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EYE SPY: Bongo wants armymen

Discussion in 'Jukwaa la Siasa' started by BAK, Dec 28, 2008.

  1. BAK

    BAK JF-Expert Member

    Dec 28, 2008
    Joined: Feb 11, 2007
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    EYE SPY: Bongo wants armymen


    HOPE you are having a lovely season. I saw a very rare advert yesterday in some paper. The TPDF is recruiting for men and women to join joys of soldiering. It promises to teach successful recruits a lot of what they don’t know. It also promises worldwide travel and a lot of fun and games while in the army.

    But there are discouraging things too. Recruits must have a Masters Degree in English or French or both. Which can be tricky. Few have a Masters Degree in Kiswahili, let alone English or French.

    And then recruits who are more than 33 years old are politely told not to apply. Which is being cheeky. Is the TPDF suggesting that I am not qualified to join the military? Because if they do, then I will do what we’re best at in Bongo just bribe the army to be recruited.

    Crazy place this. You have to bribe someone to be recruited into the armed forces. Everything is ’dili’ in this country. Unless you are a biggie. Just look at how the kids of the biggies desperately hang on the coat-tails of their parents to get jobs.

    Which is why Tanzania had that who-is-the-kid-which-ruler parade at the Bank of Tanzania’s. Some of the kids were so thick in their heads, you couldn’t drive a six-inch nail through them. But they got jobs in BoT. That was embarrassing, even by Tanzanian standards!

    Picture this: A son or daughter of a big shot attends an interview. They usually have fancy names. Something like Maxine or Richard. Their parents might have been thinking of Hollywood when they were manufacturing them.

    So Maxine walks into the recruiting hall. ’’Young lady, tell us about your qualifications for joining the Bank of Tanzania.’’

    Maxine giggles and then starts: ’’Er my faza is minister.. ’’
    ’’Is that it, young lady?’’


    ’’Oh that’s brilliant, young lady. Never in the history of giving interviews have I seen such patriotism and clear headedness. You are hired!’’ says the beaming personnel manager. He doesn’t ask for sexual favours because the girl's father gave him job in the first place.

    That's how it goes in our country.

    You see nothing is impossible in Tanzania. I have witnessed the ages of some people in government getting lower the older their real age is. One official reduced his age by five years. He is now officially 54 and I hear he is growing younger by the day.

    I think I will go back to 28 years. Although, looking back, I would not like to do the things I used to do when I was that age. And�. today there is this HIV/Aids thing, you see. I would rather read a book while sipping some spiced tea than do those things.