Am I wrong if I process divorce?

Pole sana ila angalia kilicho bora...

Kama una msimamo basi hama hapo nyumbani na ujitenge naye...

Kama anakuhitaji utajua na ndio hapo pakukazia kama unarudi iwe kwa masharti...

Au unakhofu unyanyapaa wa kuwa single mother?
Ameshajiaminisha kuwa hupindui...
Baadae ataona akutie na kilema kabisa ili ushindwe pa kwenda!


Hawa ni aina ya watu wanajifanya na mapenzi makubwa kabla ya ndoa ..

Iliwachukua mda gani mpaka kuoana?!
Nashukuru sana..nilisha move on muda mrefu na sijawahi kunyanyapaa single mother tena raha sana kuishi bila kuulizwa na kuudhiwa😄 japo yeye bado ananifanyia visa vya mbalimbali na distance yote.
 
Akili za kuambiwa changanya na zako...usiamini maushauri ya mtandaoni kuna watu wanapitia mambo ya hovyo zaidi ya hayo uliyosema lkn hapa watakwambia anza maisha yako wakati wao wapo kwny mahusiano ya hovyo zaidi.

Fanya kile unachoona sahihi kwa maisha yako
Asante nilishafanya na kukubali kuanza upya. Maisha yangu yalikuwa hatarini. Chochote kinachotishia uhai wako si cha kukifumbia macho. Kwangu ilitosha.
 
Hello,
I have always been reading threads without commenting. Kwanini nimeanzisha hii thread?

I am a married lady..in my very early 30s( with over 11 years of marriage experience). I got married when I was in my early 20s. Graduated my masters in my very early 20s as well.

It has never been a peaceful marriage pamoja na jitihada nyingi nilizofanya mimi kuisimamia na kujinyenyekeza kwa kuweka elimu na appearance yangu pembeni. Kifupi tu ya ninayopitia;

1. Being heavily beaten mpaka kulazwa whenever he drinks( mind you, he is a regular drinker)

2. Hakuwahi kuja msiba wa baba yangu mzazi sababu kuu 'alikuwa na washkaji trip'

3. Sijui sh.yake japo anajenga..so i pay for house and family needs mpaka nilipojua ameandikisha hio nyumba jina la ndugu yake

4. Gari pia nilimpa hela akaninunulie yard hapa mjini karudi kaiweka jina lake. Sio kwamba hana hela..no he is financially stable.( sijui ananikomoa nini na sijawahi kutishia kuondoka wala nini-kwa wanaonijua nje wanaweza kuthibitisha hili)

5. Restrictions with my dress code. Anataka nishone vitenge mpaka miguuni. Ana wivu wa ajabu sana na mimi kupendeza au hata kusuka nywele hataki. Hataki nivae suruali,jeans and he found me wearing all those.He wants me rough NOW na anasema nataka kupendeza kwa ajili ya nani? Ananitumia mpaka threads sijui za wanawake 'wenye makalio makubwa hawana akili' nijitathmini na mimi(he picks everything from the internet). Hili halinisumbui sana because i know nina akili ya shule na maisha pia

6. Sex life is bad..very bad( nilishakamata mengi kwenye simu yake). And to be honest it is better this way..kwamba hatushiriki like normal married couples miezi minne sasa na wala hajali yani sawa tu kwake. Binafsi nitavumilia sababu afya yangu matters a lot

7. Sijawahi kumjibu chochote, ninaomba msamaha hata ninapokosewa, ninaandaa bedroom na scents nzuri, napika napeleka mtoto kwa dada yangu for sleep over ili tupate muda fulani ila ndio anarudi alfajiri na asubuhi ananiuliza nani kanifundisha mambo ya kihuni. Vikao vilishakaliwa mno..i know for a fact, he won't change.

8. I have shared my case kwa mtu mmoja tu,a man lately..ambae amekuwa so concerned na sijui tutaenda nae wapi as am beginning to fall in love na yeye(najua inabidi niwe muangalifu kwa wanaokuja kusikitika na mimi kumbe amenitamani tu kutokana na physical appearance and all that)

Sijaacha kuwa msafi..sijaacha kujipenda BUT i am dying deep down. NO LOVE NO SUPPORT hata ile kidogo na sijamuongelesha kwa mara ya kwanza toka anipige miezi 4 iliopita na kulazwa(sababu hapa ilikuwa sikuvaa nguo kama madira ambapo kazini siwezi kuvaa japo navaa kiheshima sana yet smart)na kisha kurudi nyumbani baada ya kusuluhishwa..hajui naishi vipi japo nina kazi yangu ni kama KAKA NA DADA.

Our wedding was a church wedding. NIMECHOKA. Sijui naanzia wapi kutoka but ninahitaji kutoka kwenye hiki kifungo

I believe atakuja kunifukuza kwenye nyumba alioiandika jina la ndugu yake. Maana hapa ni kama mpangaji na hela anayo mpaka ya kunywa ma hennessy kila weekend. I am a God fearing person deep down..sana! Sikuwahi kuwaza kwanini wengine wananunuaga viwanja pembeni..na nilikuwa mtu wa kwanza kupinga wanawake wa aina hii.

Ninasukumwa kuanza 'ku save kidogokidogo' na kupunguza kulisha familia ili nijipange na kibanda changu japo najiuliza mpaka nimefanikiwa kumaliza kujenga sio leo wala kesho i assume(kutokana na nachoki earn) na nitakuwa tortured kwa level ipi mpaka nimalize kujenga. Niko confused hasa

But I need advice..ninachanganyikiwa hata kazini performance inashuka.
Kindly advice
Pole dada..kama you are god fearing person..basi simama kwenye maombi. Mungu akufariji na utumie pia akili yako...ya kusave for your life. Nyenyekea tu ...kama mungu atakavyo..but you real need to be seriou in prayer...sio unajihurumia...if you hv to fast fast seriously....tafuta uso wa mungu kwa bidii yote and will heal your marriage.

Naamini kuwa mumeo anakupenda..ndio maana anatafuta suluhu kila ukiondoka..but what keep him away from you ni shetani..na huyo hafukuzwi kwa kulialia..anafukuzwa kwa neno lenye mamlaka..nguvu ya mungu tuipatayo ktk maombi ya kweli kabisa. Tafuta watumishi wenye hekima wakyongoze ktk hili.

Ila yanamwisho tu..na mwisho wake ni mtamu kuluko mwanzo..but inakubidi uzidi kuwa mvumilivu na mwenye uani juu ya uwezo wa mungu kuponya ndoa yako.

Barikiwa sana
 
Pole dada..kama you are god fearing person..basi simama kwenye maombi. Mungu akufariji na utumie pia akili yako...ya kusave for your life. Nyenyekea tu ...kama mungu atakavyo..but you real need to be seriou in prayer...sio unajihurumia...if you hv to fast fast seriously....tafuta uso wa mungu kwa bidii yote and will heal your marriage.

Naamini kuwa mumeo anakupenda..ndio maana anatafuta suluhu kila ukiondoka..but what keep him away from you ni shetani..na huyo hafukuzwi kwa kulialia..anafukuzwa kwa neno lenye mamlaka..nguvu ya mungu tuipatayo ktk maombi ya kweli kabisa. Tafuta watumishi wenye hekima wakyongoze ktk hili.

Ila yanamwisho tu..na mwisho wake ni mtamu kuluko mwanzo..but inakubidi uzidi kuwa mvumilivu na mwenye uani juu ya uwezo wa mungu kuponya ndoa yako.

Barikiwa sana
Thank you,but God has been faithful
 
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