jerrytz
JF-Expert Member
- Oct 10, 2012
- 5,960
- 4,209
The phrase Must work well with others is so commonly found on job descriptions for open positions that it gets ignored almost completely. And yet its not simply text placed there to fill space, nor is it an empty requestits a threat. If you dont work well with others, youre going to get fired. Ive listed 30 habits below which, when implemented correctly, Ive seen contribute to individual and team success.
Group of Multiethnic Diverse Business People
Some of the practices may seem obvious, but if they were obvious to everyone, everyone would get them right. Chances are for every habit Ive listed below you know someone who gets it wrong. There are a lot more ways to work well with others, but I chose to mention the practices I feel provide the largest benefits with the least amount of effort.
Many of these items might seem like small things, but getting just a few wrongor rightcan be the difference between keeping a job and getting fired, getting a promotion or staying where youre...
1. Brush your teeth.
2. Use deodorant.
Bad breath is bad enough, but dont layer it on with body odor as well. You might think this is obvious and doesnt need to be included in this list, but Ill bet you know someone who is fragrantly challenged.
3. Dont swear.
I wouldnt ban it either, even though I dont swear and prefer a workplace where no one else does either. But as a member of a team its as simple as thisif you swear you will probably offend someone, and if you dont, you will offend no one. Not swearing is an easy way to minimize the risk of pushing co-workers away.
4. Respond to emails immediately.
If it will take less than two minutes to respond to an email, respond immediately. If it will take longer, mark it for follow up. I would add that even when it will take longer to compose a full response, you should compose a short response, even if its no more than Just wanted to let you know I got this, Ill respond in more detail by end of day today.
5. Respond to emailsalways.
Ever notice how on sitcoms nobody says bye at the end of phone calls? Dont make the same mistake with email correspondence. Many people ask a question via email, get a response, and then never respond with Thanks!
6. Double check your email responses.
Take 10 seconds before sending any email to check two things; 1) that youre sending it to the right person, 2) that you remembered any attachments.
7. Dont make noise.
Your Spotify playlist is awesome, but keep it to yourself. Wear headphones, keep them low enough that theyre not just low-volume speakers, and do everything else you can to minimize making distracting or annoying noises that might interrupt your fellow team members.
8. Stay positive.
Successful people are positive, and successful people help each other become more successful. If thats the crowd you want to run with, always look on the bright side and be solution oriented, especially when its hard.
9. Be honest, but tactful.
There are 100 wrong ways to say the right thing. Remember my team member with the bad breath? I could have told him Your breath smells like something dark and evil crawled into your throat and died. Whats your problem? Technically, I would have been correct on the facts, but my goal was to solve the problem without causing a host of others. I was direct, but showed respect and concern without judging him.
10. Smile.
People like people who smile. People who smile are happier and more successful. And theres a science behind it, as Buffers Leo Widrich points out in his excellent blog post The Science of Smiling: A Guide to Humans Most Powerful Gesture. Smiling is also quite affordable.
11. Remember names.
It might be one of the most valuable tidbits of wisdom in Dale Carnegies classic How to Win Friends and Influence People.If you want to win friends, make it a point to remember them. If you remember my name, you pay me a subtle compliment you indicate that I have made an impression on you. Remember my name and you add to my feeling of importance.
13. Pick up small pieces of trash.
If your immediate thought is Isnt that somebody elses job? then youre not the kind of person I want on my team. The people I want to lead within my company are the ones who pitch in wherever they can. Instead of asking Cant someone else do it? theyre asking Is this a systemic issue or a one-time problem? Either way, they fix the immediate issue rather than walking on by.
14. Look at people when theyre talking.
We look away from others faces when we lack confidence, are lying, or just have poor habits. If youre lying, stop it (tip #31), but most of us are just uncomfortable staring at someones face. Theres only one way to get over it and make it feel natural, and thats to practice doing it until it become a habit.
15. Plan your day.
There are many ways to plan out your day, but to make it simple, carve out 10 minutes each morning to run through your day, make a list of what you want to get done, and schedule when youll do it. At the end of the day, review your plan. Dont let your inbox manage your time. People enjoy working with other people who are in control, and they lose respect for those who are constantly scrambling about putting out fires.
16. Take responsibility.
When something goes wrong, its human nature to say It wasnt my fault. What youre also saying is I wasnt in control of the situation. That isnt exactly reassuring to those who depend on you. People feel safe around others who are in control and have the power to bend reality to their wills. Take responsibility, plan for success, and youll find yourself surrounded by people who want to help you succeed.
17. Say no.
Ive worked with people who agreed to any request I made, but then only delivered half the time. I cant work with that type of person, because they make me look bad. Id much rather they say Sorry, Im too busy to take that on this week. Know your limits, set boundaries, and have the courage to stick to them.
18. Default to yes.
Not to be confused as contradictory with #17, while knowing when to say no is critical, always follow Guy Kawasakis advice to default to yes. This doesnt mean agreeing to do anything anyone asks of you, but it does mean giving every request serious consideration.
19. Get healthy.
Some challenges are outside our control, but many health issues are caused by a lack of exercise and an unhealthful diet. Where possible, get in a habit of daily exercise and healthful eating. If youre unavailable to work with others due to health challenges nobody might blame you, but youre still missing out on opportunities. I know from firsthand experience how hard it can be to make the necessary lifestyle changes, having been the most unhealthy member of my team for several years. In 2007 I took drastic measures and got into triathlons, trail running, and started researching health and nutrition. Right now Im enjoying reading Eat to Live by Joel Fuhrman, but there are lots of good books out there and free websites like No Meat Athlete and Green Smoothie Girl. My improved health has had a direct effect on the success of my business and my relationships with my team.
20. Put your phone away.
If your phone is on the table while youre speaking to someone, the message you are sending is Im waiting for something more important than you. If youre holding your phone in your hand, the message is Youre not nearly as important as what youre keeping me from doing on my phone.
21. Hang out.
Your co-workers dont have to be your best friends or family, but there is something to be said for spending casual time with co-workers once in a while. Youll learn things about them you would never learn at work, and youll create positive bonds that can aid in your work relationships.
22. Assume the best.
Have you ever made a negative assumption about someone based on something he did or said, only to find out later that your assumption was completely wrong? I seem to do this at least once a week. Ive found it handy as a mental exercise to try and make up my own excuses for the person in question. Give others the benefit of the doubt when theres a question, and then work to verify the facts.
23. Dont interrupt.
Sometimes we just cant wait to get our brilliant ideas out. Stop. Relax. People arent impressed when you talk, theyre impressed when you listen. If you want people to love you, get them talking about themselves, and then dont do anything to get in their way.
24. Share credit.
Three things happen when you share credit for a job well done. First, the person you share credit with will like you. Second, everyone else will respect and like you, and theyll want to work with you, because theyll see that you dont try to take all the glory for yourself. Third, you wont look like a selfish jerk, which is what happens when you try to take credit for yourself, even if the credit is truly yours.
25. Think win-win.
A zero-sum game is a situation where someone elses gain is your loss, and vice versa. Some people see almost every situation in life this way. Is that the kind of person you want to work with? If youre that way, will anyone want to work with you? Instead, look for the opportunities where everyone benefits and your career will move a lot faster. For more on win-win, theres no better read than Stephen R. Coveys masterpiece The 7 Habit of Highly Effective People.
26. Check your body language.
In her book The Charisma Myth: How Anyone Can Master the Art and Science of Personal Magnetism, Olivia Fox Cabane shows how your body language can turn people off, or make them comfortable around you. This body language can be learned, and those we think of as naturally charismatic are likely that way either because they worked on it, or grew up around people who had already had charismatic behaviors which they naturally adopted.
27. Keep an open mind.
You might be 100% sure youre right about something, and that your co-worker is wrong, but in any disagreement allow for the remote possibility that the case might be the opposite. Even if youre right, when youre sure you are you come across as a know-it-all, others will get defensive, and you wont get the support you want. As the saying goes, a man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still. A little humility shows youre more concerned about finding out whats right than being right, and that makes people feel safe sharing their thoughts with you and working toward agreement.
28. Be on time.
When youre late for an appointment, you break your word and show that youre unreliable. Youre also sending the message that the other persons time doesnt matter to you. That said, despite the best of intentions and preparations, sometimes things happen that are outside our control. When they do, communicate and renegotiate the time, apologize profusely, and if youre ever late to anything ever again, make it isnt a meeting with the same person.
29. Show sincere appreciation.
When someone does a favor for you, thank them. When they do a good job on something, recognize it. It costs you nothing, but everyone walks away richer. If you have trouble feeling sincere at first, remember that if you sincerely want to be sincere, you are.
30. Dont quit.
I dont mean you shouldnt quit your jobmaybe you should. I mean dont give up on improving yourself. If you find yourself thinking Im just not very social, Im just not good with people, then you might be right, but the lie comes when you tell yourself you cant change. You cant change the cards youve been dealt, but you can do the best you can with what youve got, and you have substantially more opportunities to create a winning hand than in a game of poker. Many of the successful people around you arent that bright, they just kept on going when others quit. People like working with individuals who keep on going, no matter what.
What are the simple habits youve found that help you work well with others? Share in the comments below.
Joshua Steimle is the CEO of MWI, a digital marketing agency with offices in the U.S. and Hong Kong.
Group of Multiethnic Diverse Business People
Some of the practices may seem obvious, but if they were obvious to everyone, everyone would get them right. Chances are for every habit Ive listed below you know someone who gets it wrong. There are a lot more ways to work well with others, but I chose to mention the practices I feel provide the largest benefits with the least amount of effort.
Many of these items might seem like small things, but getting just a few wrongor rightcan be the difference between keeping a job and getting fired, getting a promotion or staying where youre...
1. Brush your teeth.
Or do whatever it takes to get rid of your bad breath.
I once had a member of my team who had horrible breath. It was noticeable every time I spoke with him. I was hesitant to let him talk to clients. Most of us dont have such a barrier to making our breath a non-issue. Brush, use mouthwash, chew gumjust make sure you arent causing paint to peel off the walls whenever you exhale.
I once had a member of my team who had horrible breath. It was noticeable every time I spoke with him. I was hesitant to let him talk to clients. Most of us dont have such a barrier to making our breath a non-issue. Brush, use mouthwash, chew gumjust make sure you arent causing paint to peel off the walls whenever you exhale.
2. Use deodorant.
Bad breath is bad enough, but dont layer it on with body odor as well. You might think this is obvious and doesnt need to be included in this list, but Ill bet you know someone who is fragrantly challenged.
3. Dont swear.
I wouldnt ban it either, even though I dont swear and prefer a workplace where no one else does either. But as a member of a team its as simple as thisif you swear you will probably offend someone, and if you dont, you will offend no one. Not swearing is an easy way to minimize the risk of pushing co-workers away.
4. Respond to emails immediately.
If it will take less than two minutes to respond to an email, respond immediately. If it will take longer, mark it for follow up. I would add that even when it will take longer to compose a full response, you should compose a short response, even if its no more than Just wanted to let you know I got this, Ill respond in more detail by end of day today.
5. Respond to emailsalways.
Ever notice how on sitcoms nobody says bye at the end of phone calls? Dont make the same mistake with email correspondence. Many people ask a question via email, get a response, and then never respond with Thanks!
6. Double check your email responses.
Take 10 seconds before sending any email to check two things; 1) that youre sending it to the right person, 2) that you remembered any attachments.
7. Dont make noise.
Your Spotify playlist is awesome, but keep it to yourself. Wear headphones, keep them low enough that theyre not just low-volume speakers, and do everything else you can to minimize making distracting or annoying noises that might interrupt your fellow team members.
8. Stay positive.
Successful people are positive, and successful people help each other become more successful. If thats the crowd you want to run with, always look on the bright side and be solution oriented, especially when its hard.
9. Be honest, but tactful.
There are 100 wrong ways to say the right thing. Remember my team member with the bad breath? I could have told him Your breath smells like something dark and evil crawled into your throat and died. Whats your problem? Technically, I would have been correct on the facts, but my goal was to solve the problem without causing a host of others. I was direct, but showed respect and concern without judging him.
10. Smile.
People like people who smile. People who smile are happier and more successful. And theres a science behind it, as Buffers Leo Widrich points out in his excellent blog post The Science of Smiling: A Guide to Humans Most Powerful Gesture. Smiling is also quite affordable.
11. Remember names.
It might be one of the most valuable tidbits of wisdom in Dale Carnegies classic How to Win Friends and Influence People.If you want to win friends, make it a point to remember them. If you remember my name, you pay me a subtle compliment you indicate that I have made an impression on you. Remember my name and you add to my feeling of importance.
13. Pick up small pieces of trash.
If your immediate thought is Isnt that somebody elses job? then youre not the kind of person I want on my team. The people I want to lead within my company are the ones who pitch in wherever they can. Instead of asking Cant someone else do it? theyre asking Is this a systemic issue or a one-time problem? Either way, they fix the immediate issue rather than walking on by.
14. Look at people when theyre talking.
We look away from others faces when we lack confidence, are lying, or just have poor habits. If youre lying, stop it (tip #31), but most of us are just uncomfortable staring at someones face. Theres only one way to get over it and make it feel natural, and thats to practice doing it until it become a habit.
15. Plan your day.
There are many ways to plan out your day, but to make it simple, carve out 10 minutes each morning to run through your day, make a list of what you want to get done, and schedule when youll do it. At the end of the day, review your plan. Dont let your inbox manage your time. People enjoy working with other people who are in control, and they lose respect for those who are constantly scrambling about putting out fires.
16. Take responsibility.
When something goes wrong, its human nature to say It wasnt my fault. What youre also saying is I wasnt in control of the situation. That isnt exactly reassuring to those who depend on you. People feel safe around others who are in control and have the power to bend reality to their wills. Take responsibility, plan for success, and youll find yourself surrounded by people who want to help you succeed.
17. Say no.
Ive worked with people who agreed to any request I made, but then only delivered half the time. I cant work with that type of person, because they make me look bad. Id much rather they say Sorry, Im too busy to take that on this week. Know your limits, set boundaries, and have the courage to stick to them.
18. Default to yes.
Not to be confused as contradictory with #17, while knowing when to say no is critical, always follow Guy Kawasakis advice to default to yes. This doesnt mean agreeing to do anything anyone asks of you, but it does mean giving every request serious consideration.
19. Get healthy.
Some challenges are outside our control, but many health issues are caused by a lack of exercise and an unhealthful diet. Where possible, get in a habit of daily exercise and healthful eating. If youre unavailable to work with others due to health challenges nobody might blame you, but youre still missing out on opportunities. I know from firsthand experience how hard it can be to make the necessary lifestyle changes, having been the most unhealthy member of my team for several years. In 2007 I took drastic measures and got into triathlons, trail running, and started researching health and nutrition. Right now Im enjoying reading Eat to Live by Joel Fuhrman, but there are lots of good books out there and free websites like No Meat Athlete and Green Smoothie Girl. My improved health has had a direct effect on the success of my business and my relationships with my team.
20. Put your phone away.
If your phone is on the table while youre speaking to someone, the message you are sending is Im waiting for something more important than you. If youre holding your phone in your hand, the message is Youre not nearly as important as what youre keeping me from doing on my phone.
21. Hang out.
Your co-workers dont have to be your best friends or family, but there is something to be said for spending casual time with co-workers once in a while. Youll learn things about them you would never learn at work, and youll create positive bonds that can aid in your work relationships.
22. Assume the best.
Have you ever made a negative assumption about someone based on something he did or said, only to find out later that your assumption was completely wrong? I seem to do this at least once a week. Ive found it handy as a mental exercise to try and make up my own excuses for the person in question. Give others the benefit of the doubt when theres a question, and then work to verify the facts.
23. Dont interrupt.
Sometimes we just cant wait to get our brilliant ideas out. Stop. Relax. People arent impressed when you talk, theyre impressed when you listen. If you want people to love you, get them talking about themselves, and then dont do anything to get in their way.
24. Share credit.
Three things happen when you share credit for a job well done. First, the person you share credit with will like you. Second, everyone else will respect and like you, and theyll want to work with you, because theyll see that you dont try to take all the glory for yourself. Third, you wont look like a selfish jerk, which is what happens when you try to take credit for yourself, even if the credit is truly yours.
25. Think win-win.
A zero-sum game is a situation where someone elses gain is your loss, and vice versa. Some people see almost every situation in life this way. Is that the kind of person you want to work with? If youre that way, will anyone want to work with you? Instead, look for the opportunities where everyone benefits and your career will move a lot faster. For more on win-win, theres no better read than Stephen R. Coveys masterpiece The 7 Habit of Highly Effective People.
26. Check your body language.
In her book The Charisma Myth: How Anyone Can Master the Art and Science of Personal Magnetism, Olivia Fox Cabane shows how your body language can turn people off, or make them comfortable around you. This body language can be learned, and those we think of as naturally charismatic are likely that way either because they worked on it, or grew up around people who had already had charismatic behaviors which they naturally adopted.
27. Keep an open mind.
You might be 100% sure youre right about something, and that your co-worker is wrong, but in any disagreement allow for the remote possibility that the case might be the opposite. Even if youre right, when youre sure you are you come across as a know-it-all, others will get defensive, and you wont get the support you want. As the saying goes, a man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still. A little humility shows youre more concerned about finding out whats right than being right, and that makes people feel safe sharing their thoughts with you and working toward agreement.
28. Be on time.
When youre late for an appointment, you break your word and show that youre unreliable. Youre also sending the message that the other persons time doesnt matter to you. That said, despite the best of intentions and preparations, sometimes things happen that are outside our control. When they do, communicate and renegotiate the time, apologize profusely, and if youre ever late to anything ever again, make it isnt a meeting with the same person.
29. Show sincere appreciation.
When someone does a favor for you, thank them. When they do a good job on something, recognize it. It costs you nothing, but everyone walks away richer. If you have trouble feeling sincere at first, remember that if you sincerely want to be sincere, you are.
30. Dont quit.
I dont mean you shouldnt quit your jobmaybe you should. I mean dont give up on improving yourself. If you find yourself thinking Im just not very social, Im just not good with people, then you might be right, but the lie comes when you tell yourself you cant change. You cant change the cards youve been dealt, but you can do the best you can with what youve got, and you have substantially more opportunities to create a winning hand than in a game of poker. Many of the successful people around you arent that bright, they just kept on going when others quit. People like working with individuals who keep on going, no matter what.
What are the simple habits youve found that help you work well with others? Share in the comments below.
Joshua Steimle is the CEO of MWI, a digital marketing agency with offices in the U.S. and Hong Kong.
