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Sifa unahitaji mpaka kwa wazazi? kwani walikuwa wamekutuma huwatafutie msaidizi.

Ni maumbile yao ushindi yako ni yenu ilhali ushindi wake ni yake pekee.

Kali sana. Hahahaa.

Its only wen you see a mosquito landing on yo testicles that you realize that there is always a way to solve problems without using violence.

Hahahaaa. Alikuwa kweli zuzu mwerevu sababu aliweza kushika majibu yote bila hata kusahau neno moja.

Mmm. Nilifanya uchunguzi nikapata wanaenda nazo ndani.

I MUST CONFESS, This is How it started..... She visited me and I gave her a bed to sleep on. I asked her to open up so that i can find my way in. She was so Nervous but i told her that everything would be alright. I squeezed it in and asked her to open wider, i squeezed it in again this...

Mlevi mmoja aliingia kwenye matatu nakukaa siti ya mbele, akaweka begilake kwenye siti kulia kwake kishaakalala.Baada ya muda akaingia mlevimwingine akatoa lile begi, akaketiyeye...naye akalala.Mlevi wa kwanza alipoamka bilakuangalia akafungua zipu ya mlevimwenzake akijua anafungua...

BABA: "Tano ongeza kumi ni ngapi?"MTOTO: "Sijui"BABA: "Aaah we -----, kwanini hujui hesabu rahisi ka hio!!"MTOTO: "Baba ukiona noti ya elfu 1 na mia 5 utaokota ipi?"BABA: "Nitaokota ya elfu 1"MTOTO: "Wee -----, kwanini usiokote zote!!!"

Chizi alikuwa anatembea, akaona kitu kama kinyesi. Akainama akagusa na kidole kisha akalamba akasema "waa, ni mavi kweli! THANK GOD SIKUKANYAGA!!!''

A husband was preparing to go to work and his wife tells him,"Honey.I need 500 shillings,I have to go out and buy some meat."Husband:"500 shillings! are you crazy,come upstairs to the bathroom I want to show you something...he then stands infrontof the mirror takes out a 500 shillings note and...

No English dictionary has been able to explain the difference between this two words;"COMPLETE and FINISHED"Some people say there is no difference between COMPLETE ANDFINISHED,but there is:-When you marry the right womanyou are COMPLETE and when you marry the wrong woman you are FINISHED.When...

Girl : "Forgive me father for I have sinned." Priest : "What have you done my child?" Girl : "I called a man a son of a bitch." Priest : "Why did you call him a son of a bitch?" Girl : "Because he touched my hand." Priest : "Like this?" (as he touches her hand) Girl : "Yes father."...

Teacher:"Why didn't you Study?" Student:"Madam, a year has 365 days for you to study.After taking 52 sundays,there are only 313 days left.There are 50 days in the summer that's way to hot to work,so there are 263 days left.We sleep 8 hours a day,in a year that counts up to 122days so now we're...

Teh teh teh.

Kweli kabisa

Hivi unajua kuwa English ni lugha ya wanyama....Maan a Paka akiona unamcheleweshea maziwa anakwambia,"NOW ." Ng'ombe ukimpa majani akiwa hajashiba utamsikia akikwambia,"M0R E." Mbwa ukipita karibu na nyumba yao na kama hajajua kuwa wewe ni nani utasikia anakuuliza,"WHO WHO."

This is how the human brain often works when our status changes. Very few remember what life was like before, and who was always by their side in the most painful situations. * Life Is a Gift Today before you say an unkind word Think of someone who can't speak. * Before you complain about the...

1.You work your entire life making money just to get a wife. 2.You have to act tough no matter your fears. 3.After buying a ring,you'll need a woman to confirm whether you get married or not. 4.You spend millions to make yourwedding a success and your wife takes the glory. 5.You work extra...

Jamaa flani alikuwa akisafiri kwa taxi,akapita kwenye bar mmoja yenye geust house akamuona mke wake akiingia ndani ya hiyo bar. JAMAA:"Dereva hebu simamisha gari....unataka elfu moja ya chapchap?" DEREVA:"Bila shaka mzee." JAMAA:"Mke wangu kaingia kwenye ile bar,picha yake hii...nenda ukamtoe na...