Dismiss Notice
You are browsing this site as a guest. It takes 2 minutes to CREATE AN ACCOUNT and less than 1 minute to LOGIN

Women don't make sense!

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by fiksiman, May 7, 2009.

  1. fiksiman

    fiksiman JF-Expert Member

    #1
    May 7, 2009
    Joined: May 17, 2008
    Messages: 401
    Likes Received: 35
    Trophy Points: 45
    Have you ever noticed that women don't seem to make sense AT ALL when it comes to "dating?"

    What's up with that?

    I'm sure you've been in a situation where you really liked a woman, and you did everything "right"... but for some reason she just never felt attracted to you...

    You called her often, took her to nice places, bought her gifts, and were a complete gentleman (translation, you didn't try to kiss her, gave her space, etc.)... but nothing seemed to cause her to like you for more than just a "friend"...

    And I'm sure you've been in a situation where a TOTALLY HOT female friend of yours was dating a complete jerk who was mean and abusive to her...and all she did was tell you about how badly he treats her (and of course she talks about the sex, too)... all the while you're sitting there and would do ANYTHING just to have a chance at dating her. Right?

    What is going on here?

    Why is it that when you're overly nice to a woman in the beginning, it just causes them to be less and less interested? And why is it that jerky guys who mistreat women seem to get laid like Rock Stars, even though they are the WORST possible choice for an attractive woman?

    This is a fascinating question to me.
     
  2. 007/Mrs.bond

    007/Mrs.bond Member

    #2
    May 7, 2009
    Joined: May 6, 2009
    Messages: 19
    Likes Received: 0
    Trophy Points: 0
    Sidhani kama ni hivyo, kwa uelewa wangu ni kwamba...kama huyo mwanamke kweli alikuwa na guy anayemsumbua na kufikia kuachana...kinachompelekea yeye ku behave hivyo ni kwa sababu bado ana fear na yaliyomtokea na pengine hayupo tayari ku handle another new relationship. Kinachotakiwa hapa usimpeleke haraka na wala usimgusie khs any relationship btn you two. Wewe nenda naye tuu taratibu, siku ya siku atakupa signal either body language that she needs you...kisha na wewe ndo uanze kutupa ndoano zako! au sio.
     
  3. Icadon

    Icadon JF-Expert Member

    #3
    May 7, 2009
    Joined: Mar 21, 2007
    Messages: 3,588
    Likes Received: 7
    Trophy Points: 0
    The answer to you fascinating question is Stop trying to be somebody that you are not.
     
  4. F

    Flowen New Member

    #4
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: May 3, 2009
    Messages: 3
    Likes Received: 0
    Trophy Points: 0
    Are you a nice guy who has always wondered why the cocky guy -- the one who barely appears interested in the girl -- is usually the one who gets the girl?
    Have you suffered from hearing the words, "You're a really nice guy, but I only like you as a friend," from a woman who you would do (or may, in fact, have already done) just about anything and everything for -- only to turn around and watch her date (or even chase) a guy who treats her like she's nothing special? And are you stumped wondering why she would date a guy who treats her like that when she could have you who would treat her like a princess and give her everything she wants? Well, you better brace yourself because I'm going to tell you a couple of secrets that you might not want to hear.
    First, "nice" equates with boring and predictable. Look up "nice" in the dictionary and you find: pleasant; agreeable; satisfactory. In other words, average -- not exceptional, not exciting, and not sexy.I'll bet you've never heard a woman say she didn't want to date a guy because he was too confident, too passionate, or too exciting -- have you? But, I'll bet you have heard women say things like, "He's such a nice guy. He's so sweet and he's always there for me, but I only like him as a friend." Or, "He's such a good guy -- kind, thoughtful, generous, honest, loyal -- but there's no chemistry. He just doesn't turn me on." Sadly, I hear it all the time. The fact is, Mr. Nice Guy, you cannot bore a woman into feeling attracted to you or into wanting to date you. And as obvious as that sounds, if you are one of those guys I described that is exactly what you are trying to do. And it won't work.
    Please understand that I am not suggesting that you mistreat women or disrespect them in any way.

    [​IMG]What I'm suggesting is that you value and respect yourself more.[​IMG]







    To illustrate what I mean: The answer to the question, "Why does the guy who doesn't appear to care as much about the girl get the girl?" is simple: The nice guy cares too much, too soon. He has made the woman too important and too valuable and it shows in everything he says and does. He is too available, too eager to please, too accommodating, and he gives too much -- all without getting anything in return. By doing so, he has made himself appear desperate, insecure, needy of this woman's attention, affection, and approval -- and he has stripped himself of any value in her eyes. After all, if he's already doing and giving everything, without her doing or giving anything - why would she value him? She won't. She is not going to value him any more than he values himself. What she is going to do is look for someone else, someone who she perceives as being more worthy, more confident, and more valuable.
    It works like this:

    [​IMG]Once you need something, or you want it too badly, you forfeit your strength and lose all power of negotiation.[​IMG]






    You are in a position of weakness and you are perceived as weak. Someone (or something) else is in control of you, the situation, and it's outcome. Men in this situation appear to be anything but confident, strong, and exciting. More, they are perceived as being unworthy and as lacking value.
    Translation: Things that are easily acquired, obtained, or maintained, without any effort or sacrifice, lack value... it's human nature.
    The secret to why the cocky guy wins with women, over the nice guy, is that he is perceived as being a stronger, more confident guy with more value. How? He never invests everything -- his entire being, ego, and self-worth in what one woman's response or reaction to him is. He doesn't gush with compliments; he isn't always available; he doesn't give too much; and he knows he isn't going to die if a woman says "no" to him. More, his attitude is, yeah, I'd like to go out with you, but if I can't, that's OK -- I'm a busy guy, with exciting things going on,
     
  5. Violet

    Violet Member

    #5
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: Nov 17, 2008
    Messages: 99
    Likes Received: 0
    Trophy Points: 0
    Mpende akupendaye, usijilazimishe usipopendwa, utachomolewa na kuchunwa tuu. Mapenzi hayanunuliwi. NIMEJIFUNZA MAISHANI KUMPENDA ANAYENIPENDA, HATA KAMA MWANZONI HUMPENDI VILE, LKN KUTOKANA NA PENZI ANALOKUONYESHA,( U CAN LEARN TO LOVE SOMEONE) MWISHOWE UTAMPENDA. SISEMI KUWA NA MTU HUMPENDI KABISA, ONLY SABABU ANAKUPENDA , NO
     
  6. F

    Flowen New Member

    #6
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: May 3, 2009
    Messages: 3
    Likes Received: 0
    Trophy Points: 0
    Are you a nice guy who has always wondered why the cocky guy -- the one who barely appears interested in the girl -- is usually the one who gets the girl?

    Have you suffered from hearing the words, "You're a really nice guy, but I only like you as a friend," from a woman who you would do (or may, in fact, have already done) just about anything and everything for -- only to turn around and watch her date (or even chase) a guy who treats her like she's nothing special? .And are you stumped wondering why she would date a guy who treats her like that when she could have you who would treat her like a princess and give her everything she wants? Well, you better brace yourself because I'm going to tell you a couple of secrets that you might not want to hear.
    First, "nice" equates with boring and predictable. Look up "nice" in the dictionary and you find: pleasant; agreeable; satisfactory. In other words, average -- not exceptional, not exciting, and not sexy.I'll bet you've never heard a woman say she didn't want to date a guy because he was too confident, too passionate, or too exciting -- have you? But, I'll bet you have heard women say things like, "He's such a nice guy. He's so sweet and he's always there for me, but I only like him as a friend." Or, "He's such a good guy -- kind, thoughtful, generous, honest, loyal -- but there's no chemistry. He just doesn't turn me on." Sadly, I hear it all the time. The fact is, Mr. Nice Guy, you cannot bore a woman into feeling attracted to you or into wanting to date you. And as obvious as that sounds, if you are one of those guys I described that is exactly what you are trying to do. And it won't work.
    Please understand that I am not suggesting that you mistreat women or disrespect them in any way.

    [​IMG]What I'm suggesting is that you value and respect yourself more.[​IMG]

    To illustrate what I mean: The answer to the question, "Why does the guy who doesn't appear to care as much about the girl get the girl?" is simple: The nice guy cares too much, too soon. He has made the woman too important and too valuable and it shows in everything he says and does. He is too available, too eager to please, too accommodating, and he gives too much -- all without getting anything in return. By doing so, he has made himself appear desperate, insecure, needy of this woman's attention, affection, and approval -- and he has stripped himself of any value in her eyes. After all, if he's already doing and giving everything, without her doing or giving anything - why would she value him? She won't. She is not going to value him any more than he values himself. What she is going to do is look for someone else, someone who she perceives as being more worthy, more confident, and more valuable.
    It works like this:

    [​IMG]Once you need something, or you want it too badly, you forfeit your strength and lose all power of negotiation.[​IMG]

    You are in a position of weakness and you are perceived as weak. Someone (or something) else is in control of you, the situation, and it's outcome. Men in this situation appear to be anything but confident, strong, and exciting. More, they are perceived as being unworthy and as lacking value.
    Translation: Things that are easily acquired, obtained, or maintained, without any effort or sacrifice, lack value... it's human nature.

    The secret to why the cocky guy wins with women, over the nice guy, is that .....he is perceived as being a stronger, more confident guy with more value. How? He never invests everything -- his entire being, ego, and self-worth in what one woman's response or reaction to him is. He doesn't gush with compliments; he isn't always available; he doesn't give too much; and he knows he isn't going to die if a woman says "no" to him. More, his attitude is, yeah, I'd like to go out with you, but if I can't, that's OK -- I'm a busy guy, with exciting things going on...

    Fiksiman I HOPE THIS POST WILL HELP YOU FIGURE OUT THE REALY REASON TO WHY WOMEN DON'T MAKE SENSE ESPECIALLY IN TIMES WHEN MEN ARE DESPERATE TO HAVE THEM AS THEIR COMPANION...
    Women are so complicated u know....
     
  7. Offish

    Offish Senior Member

    #7
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: Aug 14, 2008
    Messages: 172
    Likes Received: 0
    Trophy Points: 0
    Answers the question exhaustively, I like it.
     
  8. Offish

    Offish Senior Member

    #8
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: Aug 14, 2008
    Messages: 172
    Likes Received: 0
    Trophy Points: 0
    There you are
     
  9. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

    #9
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: May 30, 2008
    Messages: 5,467
    Likes Received: 42
    Trophy Points: 0
    ndiyo maana kuna methali " mkataa pema pabaya panamwita"
     
  10. Steve Dii

    Steve Dii JF-Expert Member

    #10
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: Jun 25, 2007
    Messages: 6,414
    Likes Received: 40
    Trophy Points: 145
    ....na ile inayosema "nyota njema huonekana asubuhi"
     
  11. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

    #11
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: May 30, 2008
    Messages: 5,467
    Likes Received: 42
    Trophy Points: 0
    Na kweli!
     
  12. Yo Yo

    Yo Yo JF-Expert Member

    #12
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: May 31, 2008
    Messages: 11,245
    Likes Received: 38
    Trophy Points: 0
    mhhhhhh.........
     
  13. Killuminati

    Killuminati JF-Expert Member

    #13
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: Apr 24, 2007
    Messages: 317
    Likes Received: 5
    Trophy Points: 33
    Ladies do love dem bad boys. Thats it, a total gentleman wanakuita buzi, ATM, n.k.

    ....And the only time they make sense is when they've been dumped by dem bad boys and appear to need some sympathy and the next thing before you know they are back with the nigga.

    ....What a world!!
     
  14. TIMING

    TIMING JF-Expert Member

    #14
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: Apr 12, 2008
    Messages: 21,797
    Likes Received: 53
    Trophy Points: 145
    I think women make more sense, especially after you described them the way you did!! They are real and have animal instincts---just like men!! She doesn't need fantasies when it comes to dating, she needs a real man!!

    The abuse part of men is rather absurd but it expresses the alpha pat of the man-kind, always competitive and territorial, na wengi walao vingi huwa na character hiyo kwa hiyo cha maana kuwa wewe na utapata vitamu

    on the other side, wanawake wengi pretenders hupenda hao nice guys, lakini baada ya muda huwachoka

     
  15. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

    #15
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: May 30, 2008
    Messages: 5,467
    Likes Received: 42
    Trophy Points: 0
    Karibu tena.
    I know who you are usianze tena!
     
  16. Shy

    Shy JF-Expert Member

    #16
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: Nov 2, 2006
    Messages: 4,238
    Likes Received: 17
    Trophy Points: 0
    islands in the stream , thats wat we are no one in btwn , how can we be wrong
     
  17. Shy

    Shy JF-Expert Member

    #17
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: Nov 2, 2006
    Messages: 4,238
    Likes Received: 17
    Trophy Points: 0
    na ngoja ngoja huumiza matumbo
     
  18. Steve Dii

    Steve Dii JF-Expert Member

    #18
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: Jun 25, 2007
    Messages: 6,414
    Likes Received: 40
    Trophy Points: 145
    ... blackmailing?
     
  19. Shy

    Shy JF-Expert Member

    #19
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: Nov 2, 2006
    Messages: 4,238
    Likes Received: 17
    Trophy Points: 0
    Ndio maana yake -- hivi mtu anajisikia raha gani anapotumia jina la bandia forum kama hii kisha anaendelea kubadilisha majina tu mara kwa mara tatizo nini ? Jamani huku sio kujenga ni kubomoa na kutia wengine wasiwasi
     
  20. Steve Dii

    Steve Dii JF-Expert Member

    #20
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: Jun 25, 2007
    Messages: 6,414
    Likes Received: 40
    Trophy Points: 145
    ...anajisikia utamu wa kujing'ata na meno!

    ... weekend njema Shy!
     
Loading...