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Wife kanibadilikia, msaada pls

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by M-bongotz, Aug 23, 2012.

  1. M-bongotz

    M-bongotz JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Aug 23, 2012
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    Kwa kweli yamenikuta na sasa naelekea kujuta kumuoa mke huyu.

    Ni mke wangu wa ndoa ambaye tunakaribia kutimiza mwaka mmoja wa ndoa japo tuliishi pamoja kwa kipindi cha miaka takribani minne kabla ya ndoa, katika kipindi chote hicho alikuwa ni mwanamke msikivu na mwenye heshima zote kiasi kwamba nikaona nimepata wife material.

    Siku zote tulishirikiana kwa kila jambo kuanzia masuala ya kawaida tu hadi yale ya kiuchumi na daima kila tulichonunua tulijua kuwa ni "chetu" bila kujalisha kina jina la nani na hivyo ndivyo ilivyokuwa. Tuliaminiana sana kiasi kwamba mwisho wa mwezi kila mtu alikuwa anaweka mshahara wake mezani na kutafakari ni nini cha kufanyia. Tulifanya kila kitu pamoja na hata wazazi wetu walikuwa wakifarijika sana kuona angalau vijana wao wana mawazo ya kimaendeleo, na si haba kwa kweli tulipiga hatua kubwa sana....hayo yote yalikuwa kabla ya ndoa.

    Uhusiano wetu ulijaaliwa kutuletea mtoto, tukaona si vyema kuendelea kuishi kama mahawara tukaamua kuhalalisha mahusiano kwa ndoa takatifu. Siku za mwanzo (japokuwa si nyingi) mambo yalikuwa safi, tuliendeleza maisha yaleyale na zaidi kidogo. Baada ya muda kidogo mwenzangu akaanza kubadilika kidogo kidogo, najua ni jukumu la baba kuhudumia familia yake (traditionally), lakini katika zama hizi nadhani maisha ni kusaidiana hususani kama wote mna kipato, basi tofauti na zamani, sasa hivi si kwamba tu ule mshahara wake unafanywa siri kubwa bali hataki kununua si kitunguu wala diapers za mtoto, worse ni kwamba niliona nimuepushe na adha ya usafiri nikamnunulia ka-gari tena very fuel efficient lakini licha ya kwamba ana mshahara na posho kibao lakini lazima hela ya fuel nitoe mimi, tena kabla sijasahau..,juzi juzi alinijia na mpya tena kwa macho makavu kabisa akitaka eti kila tunachonunua tuandike majina yetu wote wawili.,nikamwambia sema tu hata kama unataka nikuandikie urithi kabisa ( I think she is greedy and miser) kibaya zaidi ni kuwa anapenda mashindano na mimi, anapenda ku-argue kwa kitu ambacho kama angesema "samahani" maisha yangeendelea tu, kifupi ni kwamba amesahau nafasi yake ndani ya nyumba na anajaribu kujifanya yeye ndio baba na kutaka kunigeuza kuwa mtoto.

    Ndugu zangu hebu nisaidieni,nyie wengine mliooa wake zenu pia wapo hivyo?.,kina dada ni kwanini baadhi yenu wanakuwa kama vinyonga, wakati wa uchumba wanakuwa wema kweli lakini wakiigia kwenye ndoa they reveal their true colors?i

    UPDATES
    Jana asubuhi aliniomba pesa ya fuel na lunch wakati anakwenda job,kwa kuwa sikuwa na hela ya kutosha na mimi gari yangu inataka fuel nikataka nimpe ATM card yangu akachukue hela (ATM ipo jirani tu na nyumbani) akakataa na ikawa ugomvi nikaona isiwe tabu nikampa 10,000 aweke hata lita 5 then mchana akatoe hela kwenye account yake.

    Hilo lilikuwa kosa kubwa,toka jana jioni aliporudi home amenuna na usiku akaamua kulala chumba kingine leo asubuhi amekuja chumbani kunidai pesa aliyonunulia keki ya birthday ya baba yangu na hela aliyomtumia bibi yangu juzi hapa kwenye sikukuu ya Idd.
     
  2. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Aug 23, 2012
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    kwa ufupi kuna 'kidumu'

    take care...
     
  3. Scofied

    Scofied JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Aug 23, 2012
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    dah! pole sana mkuu..ndo dada zetu hao....ngoja waje...ntarudi...
     
  4. Scofied

    Scofied JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Aug 23, 2012
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    kidumu!!??? me cjakupata mkuu...
     
  5. Root

    Root JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Aug 23, 2012
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    ashapata bwana. Mvumilie kwani ni mkeo,mtoto ni wenu so be patient
     
  6. Mangaline

    Mangaline JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Aug 23, 2012
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    Usishangae, kote ni hayo hayo, sema tu wenzako hatusemi. kwako bado nafuu kwani bado hajakuletea mtoto wa kichina. bado yasubiri hata hayo. Kasisi alitudanganya kuwa "... mtu atamwacha baba yake na mama yake, naye ataambatana na mke wake, nao watakuwa mwili mmoja ....." Mkuu, hiyo haiwezekani. Mke siyo mwili mmoja na mme, They are two different entity.
    Kaza moyo, huo ndio msalaba wako.
     
  7. M-bongotz

    M-bongotz JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Aug 23, 2012
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    Duh, haya makubwa tena.
     
  8. M-bongotz

    M-bongotz JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Aug 23, 2012
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    Atleast nimejua kuwa siko peke yangu.,unachokisema ni kweli mkuu, lili fumbo la "wawili watakuwa mwili mmoja" huwa linaishia pale pale kanisani.
     
  9. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Aug 23, 2012
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    umeshamkalisha na kujadiliana kuhusu hili??

    Kuna watu wanaoana halafu wanaogopana, kwa nini?
     
  10. TIQO

    TIQO JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Aug 23, 2012
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    Mwanamke ukisha funga naye ndoa anabadilika sana. Huyu ungeendelea kuishi nae kihawara angeendelea kuwa na nidhamu maana hajui mbele itakuwaje.
     
  11. data

    data JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Aug 23, 2012
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    taja kabila lake tafadhali..!!

    Tugeneralize mambo..
     
  12. d

    destiny1 JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Aug 23, 2012
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    Duh, mwambie aolewe na bank! sasa wewe unampa za nini?
     
  13. HAZOLE

    HAZOLE JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Aug 23, 2012
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    acha conclusion za kizembe. Hiyo ni tabia tu. Tuanzie hapo.
    Kwa tabia alizonazo si za kuwa na kidumu bali ni kiburi tu cha mwanamke ambacho jamaa akirekebishe tena kwa saikolojia bila ugomvi.
    Tuishi nao kwa akili. Hapo kinatingishwa kibiriti tu.
    I stand to be corrected.
    My view
     
  14. hovyohovyo

    hovyohovyo JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Aug 23, 2012
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    Hujachelewa. Piga chini. Stress za nn maisha yenyewe haya??
     
  15. m

    mzabzab JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Aug 23, 2012
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    alafu watu ndio hamuelewi hii cohabitation ndio mbaya sana ktika kujenga ndoa imara. mwe sasa wadhani mtajuana vizuri kumbe ndio mwhribu kabisa. wee alfu tatizo ni kwamba ulimuoa bcoz ya kuwa mmepata mtoto...kosa kubwa sana.
     
  16. Ruttashobolwa

    Ruttashobolwa JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Aug 23, 2012
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    Hebe jaribu kuongea nae huyo mkeo na umueleze kuhusu unavyo kerwa na tabia yake hiyo!

    Alaf fanya uchunguzi kuhusu kubadilika kwake kwa tabia!
     
  17. Ruttashobolwa

    Ruttashobolwa JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Aug 23, 2012
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    Kuacha mke si rahisi kama unavyo fikiri!
    Ni rahisi kuacha girlfriend au mchumba!


     
  18. Mtego wa Noti

    Mtego wa Noti JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Aug 23, 2012
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    pole sana...usije ukawa na mke ambaye naye anakahudumia kaserengeti boy!...hela zake anapeleka wapi?
     
  19. cheupe sr

    cheupe sr Senior Member

    #19
    Aug 23, 2012
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    Duu pole sana ndugu yangu, ila si wote wanabadilika... hapa hekima inatakiwa zaidi kuliko mabavu.. kwanza embu jichunguze wewe, je mmeshawahi kurumbana labda amekuta simu au msgs au ameona dalili zozote za km una kidumu?

    (if any) . Maana ikishakua hivyo basi ndo mana anakuachia mzigo wote wa familia ili u exhaust mshahara wako wote kwny family. If no.. then nenda nae taratibu ukimwelewesha umuhimu wa kugawana matumizi ya ndani ili na mambo mengine yaendelee. Hapa ukumbuke lazma muwe mnampango wa maendeleo wa kila mwaka lets say mnataka mwaka huu mnunue kiwanja na kuanza ujenzi, pia source za fund lazma ziainishwe na kujievaluate kila 3months mmefikia wapi.

    So mkishakua say na kampango ka namna hiyo obviously mtarejea kwenye mgao wa majukumu na ndo kila mmoja atashika jukumu lake. Pia kama wote ni imani moja ni vema ( japo kwa wanaume inakuaga ngumu kdg) mkawa mnafanya ibada ya pamoja haswa usiku b4 kulala, inasaidia kukumbusha kumpenda mwenzio kama unavyojipenda na automatically ile greedness inaisha taratibu na pia itamsaidia kumkumbusha mume ni kichwa cha nyuma.

    Pole sana ila pambana usikubali ukiri kua ndoa inakushinda kirahisi ivyo..
     
  20. Kimox Kimokole

    Kimox Kimokole Verified User

    #20
    Aug 23, 2012
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    Kusema ile kweli, mimi wa kwangu alianza kama hivyo akataka kuwa yeye ndiye baba, nilijaribu kwa njia kibao za kidiplomasia kuweka mambo sawa ikawa ngumu. Bahati mbaya siku moja tu kichapo kikatembea mambo yakakaa sawa.

    Sikushauri umchape lakini .......
     
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