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Why chicken cross road???

Discussion in 'JF Chit-Chat' started by stevoh, Aug 10, 2012.

  1. stevoh

    stevoh JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Aug 10, 2012
    Joined: Dec 5, 2011
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    Chicken Philosophy WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

    * NURSERY TEACHER: To get to the other side.

    * PLATO: For the greater good.

    * ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.

    * KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability.

    * SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

    * RONALD REAGAN: I forget.

    * CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

    * MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR: ... I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives being called into question.

    * MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.

    * JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place, anyway?"

    * FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

    * GEORGE W. BUSH (2): We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here.

    * OLIVER STONE: The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Rather, it is, "Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?"

    * DARWIN: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross roads.

    * EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

    * BUDDHA: Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.

    * ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain.

    * NELSON MANDELA: Never again, will the chicken be questioned for crossing the road. This is an ideal for which I am prepared to die.

    * THABO MBEKI: We need to establish if really there is a connection between the chicken and the road.

    * ROBERT MUGABE: For all of these years the road has been owned by the white farmers, the poor underprivileged chicken has waited too long for that road to be given to him and now he is crossing it in force with his fellow war veteran chickens. We intend taking over this road and giving it to the roadless chickens so that they can cross it without fear of retribution from Britain who promised money to
    institute road reform. We will not stop until all roadless chickens have roads to cross and the freedom to cross them.

    * ISAAC NEWTON: Any chicken in the universe shall always cross a road perpendicularly to the side of the road, and in an infinitely long straight line at uniform speed, unless the chicken stops due to an unbalanced reactive force in the opposite direction of the chicken's motion

    * MOHAMMED ALDOURI: ( Iraqi Ambassador): The chicken did not cross the road. This is a complete fabrication. We don't even have a
    chicken.

    * RAILA ODINGA: Had the chicken signed an MOU not to cross the road?

    *MWAI EMILIO KIBAKI: Kuku ilivuka pale, ikienda pale pale!
     
  2. Judgement

    Judgement JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Aug 10, 2012
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    It was crossin' the road , coz of it's own rational choise to do so!!
    There cannot be a collective unconsious , desires are unique to each individual .
    Once upon a tym a nicens little KUKU named "BABY" Crossed the road and met a moocow (Bull or Cow's sound) comin' down !!
     
  3. Mwali

    Mwali JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Aug 10, 2012
    Joined: Nov 9, 2011
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    NYERERE: Msiishie kuuliza kwanini alivuka barabara. Swali hili ni pana!
    Kumbukeni tulikua na injinia wawitu wa kujenga barabara, wawili tu!
    Kumbukeni kuku walikua wanatembea hovyo na kupelekwa na mwewe
    wanapeleka na mwewe! Leo wanavuka barabarani, kwa amani bila shida.
    Leo Kuku wanauwezo wa kuvuka barabara. Barabara yao wamejienga pamoja
    Leo barabara hizi zinaunganisha kuku na kuku mwenzie, kijiji na kijiji.
    Na kesho watajenga ya pili, na ya tatu kuunganisha taifa na taifa.

    MWINYI: Sababu sasa tumefungulia kila kuku uwezo wa kuvuka barabara. Ruhsa!

    MKAPA: Kila kuku anapo vuka barabara analipa kodi. Alivuka kwa kuongeza pato la nchi yake

    JK: Tutaunda kamati ya kufatilia jambo hilo.

    MOSES: Because of the ten commandment: thy shall cross the road.

    JESUS: Out of love for other chickens

    MUHAMAD: Out of its fear of God. Otherwise it would roast eternally in a McDonald grill

    GALILEO: And yet, it crossed...

    MONTESQUIEUX: Because there was no power that stopped it from crossing. there need to be a power to stop its crossing power. Checks and balance

    THE LITTLE PRINCE: Crossing the road is not important. what is important is what is in its heart.

    SHAKESPEAR: Chiken, Chiken, Why did thou cross Chiken! :drama:

    WILLIAM FORD: It can cross whatever it wants to cross, so long as it is a road.
     
  4. Arushaone

    Arushaone JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Aug 11, 2012
    Joined: Mar 31, 2012
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    JK: JAMANI WAACHENI WAVUKE TU MIMI NAENDA MSOGA leo ILA KESHO NITAENDA LONDON THEN STOCKHOLM HALAFU MOSCOW THEN NAUNGANISHA NEW YORK KABLA SIJAENDA WASHINGTON SO NITAKUJA KUONGEA NAO KWENYE HOTUBA YANGU YA MWISHO WA MWEZI. LET THEM CROSS.. Y NOT.
     
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