Dismiss Notice
You are browsing this site as a guest. It takes 2 minutes to CREATE AN ACCOUNT and less than 1 minute to LOGIN

What the Politicians say about the "Chicken crossing the road"

Discussion in 'Jokes/Utani + Udaku/Gossips' started by Mzee Mwanakijiji, Jun 2, 2008.

  1. Mzee Mwanakijiji

    Mzee Mwanakijiji Platinum Member

    #1
    Jun 2, 2008
    Joined: Mar 10, 2006
    Messages: 30,384
    Likes Received: 2,443
    Trophy Points: 280
    BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! That chicken wanted change!

    JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

    HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure - right from Day One! - that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.

    GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

    DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

    COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

    BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken.* What is your definition of chicken?

    JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

    AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

    DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

    OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

    NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

    PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

    DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

    ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

    JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side.' That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that.

    GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

    BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

    ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

    JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

    ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

    COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
     
  2. BiMkubwa

    BiMkubwa JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Jun 2, 2008
    Joined: Jan 9, 2007
    Messages: 530
    Likes Received: 5
    Trophy Points: 35
    Yaani nimecheka mpaka basi, there were so many good ones in the list. If you prepared this list you are really good. Keep it up. Bado ninaendelea kucheka.
     
  3. Pundit

    Pundit JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Jun 2, 2008
    Joined: Feb 4, 2007
    Messages: 3,742
    Likes Received: 14
    Trophy Points: 0
    Very funny!

    MALCOLM X:

    The chicken crossed the road to come back home to roost!
     
  4. Mzee Mwanakijiji

    Mzee Mwanakijiji Platinum Member

    #4
    Jun 2, 2008
    Joined: Mar 10, 2006
    Messages: 30,384
    Likes Received: 2,443
    Trophy Points: 280
    Bimkubwa.. siyo ya kwangu ni mvivu mmoja katuma kwenye email... btw.. mzigo uko njiani.
     
  5. Shishi

    Shishi JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Jun 8, 2008
    Joined: Feb 11, 2008
    Messages: 1,245
    Likes Received: 4
    Trophy Points: 135
    My 2 cents...

    MLK: I have a dream, that one day all chickens will be free to cross any road without being jugded by their colour................

    Kibaki: kuku gani?? nani anasema kuku , mavi ya kuku, pumbavu, kuku iko pale pale.........na wala haikuvuka barabara yoyote..........
     
  6. Ibambasi

    Ibambasi JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Jun 9, 2008
    Joined: Jul 25, 2007
    Messages: 3,001
    Likes Received: 513
    Trophy Points: 280
    Na Mkapa je angesemaje?

    "Ni wivu wa kike kumsema kuku kavuka barabara tuwaulize nyinyi mmewezaje kuvuka barabara na kwa nguvu gani?"
     
  7. Pundit

    Pundit JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Jun 9, 2008
    Joined: Feb 4, 2007
    Messages: 3,742
    Likes Received: 14
    Trophy Points: 0
    Nyerere

    The chicken belongs to all, so in essence it really does not matter which side of the road the chicken is, as long as the means of production of the eggs are controlled by all and surplus is equally divided among the South to offset the inhuman suffering imposed by the North.The road is an artificial colonial barrier to divide and delude us.

    Kenyatta,

    If the chicken is crossing from your neighbor's boma, steal the chicken. All the chicken belong to Nyayo!

    Amin,

    Get that chicken for my appetizer Mallya Mungu.It could very well be a Tanzanian spy under disguise.
     
Loading...