Week end Special

First and foremost, you can conquer those thoughts through sheer willpower. In my opinion, this is an inborn trait, not an acquired one. Therefore, you either have it or you don't.

By working with what is already there (willpower), you can now engage the power of reason by being considerate to your other half. You put yourself in his or her shoes and think how you would feel if the tables were turned. If you end up not liking if it were you on the other end of the stick then you apply the golden rule. So trying to live by the Golden Rule is another way to overcome temptation(s).

Another thing is to set very high moral standards for yourself. I am not a religious person but I do agree with most of the so-called god's ten commandments. I think most of them are very good moral instructions that if you try your best to adhere to them then I have no doubt that you will live a life of unimpeachable integrity.

Last but not least, be true to to yourself. Don't try to be whom you are not. Just be you and 'do' you!
Imekaa vizuri sana thanks kwa useful post NN....and what if you fail the above, does it make you a bad person?
 
Just because you know someone doesnt mean you love them,
And just because you don't know people doesn't mean you cant love them,
You can still fall in love with a complete stranger in a heartbeat,
kama Mungu amepanga itokee kwako

So marafiki fungua moyo wako huwezi jua Mungu amepanga nini kwako
cause he may throw that pass to you, lakini pia kuwa Mwangalifu ....

jiulize rafiki, je moyo wako hujawahi kwenda mbio kwa mtu usiyemfahamu
Unaweza tu msikia sauti, unaweza mwona kwa picha, unaweza ona tu michango
yake hata humuhumu jf.....mhhhh yote haya ni juu ya nini??? ni juu ya mapenzi

Kwa kumalizia kumbuka kuvutiwa , kupenda , kutamani huwa hakuangalii kama
una mchumba, mke, mme au rafiki tu wa kawaida, huwa inatokea tu kwa mtu
yeyote

circumstances ya mhusiksasa nawauliza marafiki, ikikutokea huwa unachukuliaje????
week end njema


Maneno uloongea hapa ni ya Msingi mno… Hio paragraph in red… Ni kweli waweza fall in love na a complete stranger wala usijue imekuaje… Thou hio haijalishi huo moyo wako umefunga au lah! Falling in love happens dear hata kama umefunga Moyo mpaka waweza jishangaa what exactly HIT you…

Kuhusu Moyo kwenda mbio kwa mtu usie mfahamu… ni rare but it happens.. nafikiri umewahi sikia story za watu mbali mbali… nampenda mwandishi/mtangazaji Fulani na wala hajawahi muona.. How ever umezungumzia hapa JF… as much as tunaonana (kwa maandishi) na members mbali mbali… kuna baadhi ya mambo katika michango na tabia ya mtu hu sip thru… Ambazo zaweza kua na mvuto/kero in one way or another… kwamba ukiamua na ukaachia moyo kama ulivo sisitiza waweza jikuta you have fallen…

Kukuhus swali lako in Blue… Jinsi unavochukulia ndio muhimu kuliko yoote…. Kwamba utaendekeza? Kwamba utataka m-happen? Kwamba utajiachia kabisa moyo wako na fall HARD? Yoote hio ikitegemea na a/wahusika… are they single/married?? Je watakwepana?? Wata ignore ama ku indulge?? – Hio ita determine ni jinsi gani itachukuliwa pande zoote…

Shantel Weekend njema nawee pia...
 
Imekaa vizuri sana thanks kwa useful post NN....and what if you fail the above, does it make you a bad person?

Nimefurahi kuwa umeipenda.

We human beings are not infallible. On occasions we do fail. But occasional failure shouldn't always define who we are. We should strive to improve ourselves, correct the wrongs we do, strengthen our weaknesses, and in the end be defined by the totality of the life we have lived rather than just a few and isolated incidents where we failed.

So to directly answer your question, no, failure doesn't necessarily make you a bad person. In fact failure can make you a better person especially if you use it as a teachable moment and learn from it. But of course it all depends on a lot things and it is not that cut-and-dry.
 
Nimefurahi kuwa umeipenda.

We human beings are not infallible. On occasions we do fail. But occasional failure shouldn't always define who we are. We should strive to improve ourselves, correct the wrongs we do, strengthen our weaknesses, and in the end be defined by the totality of the life we have lived rather than just a few and isolated incidents where we failed.

So to directly answer your question, no, failure doesn't necessarily make you a bad person. In fact failure can make you a better person especially if you use it as a teachable moment and learn from it. But of course it all depends on a lot things and it is not that cut-and-dry.


NN in your opinion does the above apply if you are both free??

And is it a failure if you indulge into feelings yet not do anything about those feelings??
 
NN in your opinion does the above apply if you are both free??

In some areas, depending on the person, it can apply.

And is it a failure if you indulge into feelings yet not do anything about those feelings??

This depends on what kind of standards you have set for yourself and also your conscience. For what I know indulgence can lead to abandonment. If you indulge too much in something then consequently you may very well abandon yourself to whatever it is that you are indulged in.
 
Inawezekana shantel kumpenda mtu hujawahi muona ila nafikiri tunapaswa kucontrol hisia zetu hasa kama umependa wakati tayari upo katika mahusiano mengine.
Kama umependa mtu kwa sababu umemsikia tu au unamsoma hapa jeief nakushauri kuwa makini, sio wote wanayoyaongea ndio wanayoyatenda....... Anaweza kuonekana msafi kumbe ni mchafu. Watu wa mtandaoni hupenda kuonekana namna wangependa wawe (wengi huonekana sivyo walivyo). Wapo wanaopenda kuonekana ni wastaarabu/wakorofi kumbe sivyo. Wengine hupenda kuonekana ni watu wa dini, wengine kuonekana ni watoto/wakubwa, kuonekana wameoa/hawajaoa.
Kila mtu ana maisha yake ya kimtandao na yanaweza kuwa tofauti na maisha yake ya nje.
Control hisia zenu angalau mtakapoonana na kuendelea kufahamiana zaidi ndio mnaweza kupiga hatua nyingine mbele.
 
Nilikuta mtu ameandika you tube 'being married does not mean that I can't see that this guy is handsome; am happily married but I still see Van Vicker very attractive' Nilicheka peke yangu

Ni kweli huwa inatokea kuvutiwa na opposite sex hata kama una commitment. Lakini kama uko makini upaswi kuendekeza hisia; you need to be in cotroll of your feelings. Mimi mshipa wa kupenda mtu mwingine ulishakatika siku nyingi though I admit that I can still see handsome/attractive guys and thank God for his work. Ila mawazo ya uzinzi nope.

And I also help those who are attracted to me not to make their advances kwa ku keep away from them.
 
In some areas, depending on the person, it can apply.

Please enlighten me....

This depends on what kind of standards you have set for yourself and also your conscience. For what I know indulgence can lead to abandonment. If you indulge too much in something then consequently you may very well abandon yourself to whatever it is that you are indulged in.

In this case standards would be more about what is perceived good to you na jammii or should i say the inbreed moral beliefs... Thus, from this - if one is married (not free) falls for the stranger and does nothing about it her/his conscience free and comfy then it is OK... Hivo then ukishikilia this then you can escape the one in red in which i so agree with you.... In fact; IMO hio in red says Indulge.. but do not indulgence overcome oneself....
 
Nakubaliana na wewe Husninyo; hata kama ningekuwa single the last place to search for a partner ni kwenye mtandao kama hapa JF. Uwezekano wa kulamba galasha ni mkubwa sana.
Inawezekana shantel kumpenda mtu hujawahi muona ila nafikiri tunapaswa kucontrol hisia zetu hasa kama umependa wakati tayari upo katika mahusiano mengine.
Kama umependa mtu kwa sababu umemsikia tu au unamsoma hapa jeief nakushauri kuwa makini, sio wote wanayoyaongea ndio wanayoyatenda....... Anaweza kuonekana msafi kumbe ni mchafu. Watu wa mtandaoni hupenda kuonekana namna wangependa wawe (wengi huonekana sivyo walivyo). Wapo wanaopenda kuonekana ni wastaarabu/wakorofi kumbe sivyo. Wengine hupenda kuonekana ni watu wa dini, wengine kuonekana ni watoto/wakubwa, kuonekana wameoa/hawajaoa.
Kila mtu ana maisha yake ya kimtandao na yanaweza kuwa tofauti na maisha yake ya nje.
Control hisia zenu angalau mtakapoonana na kuendelea kufahamiana zaidi ndio mnaweza kupiga hatua nyingine mbele.
 
Inawezekana shantel kumpenda mtu hujawahi muona ila nafikiri tunapaswa kucontrol hisia zetu hasa kama umependa wakati tayari upo katika mahusiano mengine. Kama umependa mtu kwa sababu umemsikia tu au unamsoma hapa jeief nakushauri kuwa makini, sio wote wanayoyaongea ndio wanayoyatenda....... Anaweza kuonekana msafi kumbe ni mchafu. Watu wa mtandaoni hupenda kuonekana namna wangependa wawe (wengi huonekana sivyo walivyo). Wapo wanaopenda kuonekana ni wastaarabu/wakorofi kumbe sivyo. Wengine hupenda kuonekana ni watu wa dini, wengine kuonekana ni watoto/wakubwa, kuonekana wameoa/hawajaoa.
Kila mtu ana maisha yake ya kimtandao na yanaweza kuwa tofauti na maisha yake ya nje.
Control hisia zenu angalau mtakapoonana na kuendelea kufahamiana zaidi ndio mnaweza kupiga hatua nyingine mbele.

Hapo in red... kuna members weengi saana JF nasikia wameumizwa.. mtu mpaka anaona JF ni chungu tena.... Ni bora hata wale wanakutana kama friends bila nia ya kutongozana (thou ni rare), alafu ikaenda na flow....
 
Nilikuta mtu ameandika you tube 'being married does not mean that I can't see that this guy is handsome; am happily married but I still see Van Vicker very attractive' Nilicheka peke yangu

Ni kweli huwa inatokea kuvutiwa na opposite sex hata kama una commitment. Lakini kama uko makini upaswi kuendekeza hisia; you need to be in cotroll of your feelings. Mimi mshipa wa kupenda mtu mwingine ulishakatika siku nyingi though I admit that I can still see handsome/attractive guys and thank God for his work. Ila mawazo ya uzinzi nope.

And I also help those who are attracted to me not to make their advances kwa ku keep away from them.

My kind of a woman! Keep up being that way!
 
Hapo in red... kuna members weengi saana JF nasikia wameumizwa.. mtu mpaka anaona JF ni chungu tena.... Ni bora hata wale wanakutana kama friends bila nia ya kutongozana (thou ni rare), alafu ikaenda na flow....

Kumbe unasikia tu....
 
Nilikuta mtu ameandika you tube 'being married does not mean that I can't see that this guy is handsome; am happily married but I still see Van Vicker very attractive' Nilicheka peke yangu

Ni kweli huwa inatokea kuvutiwa na opposite sex hata kama una commitment. Lakini kama uko makini upaswi kuendekeza hisia; you need to be in cotroll of your feelings. Mimi mshipa wa kupenda mtu mwingine ulishakatika siku nyingi though I admit that I can still see handsome/attractive guys and thank God for his work. Ila mawazo ya uzinzi nope.

And I also help those who are attracted to me not to make their advances kwa ku keep away from them.

NK... hii post imenifurahisha... napenda the way umesindikiza ni red kwa finality ya Blue... Naamini kabisa kama mhusika una msimao huo basi hata yale aliosema NN hayawezi kukuta wala hutastahili kufanyia kazi....
 
hata kama ningekuwa single the last place to search for a partner ni kwenye mtandao kama hapa JF. Uwezekano wa kulamba galasha ni mkubwa sana.
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huwa siamini kama wanaotafta wachumba net wapo serious!
Hivi katika mazingira ya kawaida na tunavyointeract na watu unaweza kosa mchumba kweli hadi mtu aamue kutafta kivuli internet!!
 
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