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Wazazi,ndugu hawamtaki,na yeye hataki kuelewa,ushauri wako unahitajika sana hapa!!

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by The Magnificent, Feb 26, 2012.

  1. The Magnificent

    The Magnificent JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Feb 26, 2012
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    Ndugu zangu wanaJF

    Nimekuwa kwenye mahusiano na binti mmoja wa kichagga kwa mwaka mmoja sasa,na kama mjuavyo siku zote mahusiano ya watu wazima wawili yanahitimishwa na ndoa’sasa ishu yenyewe ipo hivi….
    Wazazi,ndugu,marafiki kwa asilimia kubwa hakuna anayeniunga mkono katika suala la kumuoa binti huyu,na sababu yao ya msingi ni kwmba ni MCHAGGA.wamejaribu kunieleza kwa mifano hali halisi na tabia za watu wa kabila hili waliowahi kuolewa na ndugu zetu na effects walizozileta kwenye familia zao.

    Ukweli ni kwamba yote niliyoelezwa ni sahihi na mifano ninaiona pamoja na matatizo yao kweli yanaonekana kwa mtu yeyote mwenye uelewa mzuri……katika kutafuta ushauri nikashauriwa kwamba ni vema nimweleze mwezangu hali halisi na kutowezekana kwa ndoa kuwepokwa manufaa yetu wote yaani mimi nay eye,

    Tatizo limekuja katika kuipokea habari yenyewe,dada wa watu kaipokea negatively na anadai namzingua,ukweli ni kwamba mimi sipo tayari kuwa nae kulingana na sababu nilizomweleza ambazo ni za msingi Kabisa,sasa jamani………nahitaji ushauri wenu wa dhati jinsi gani niweze kumwelewesha dada huyu ilia aache kulia lia na kuangalia mambo yake mengine hasa shule maana ndo kwanza yupo mwaka wa pili katika moja ya vyuo vikuu hapa nchini………

    Nawasilisha wakuu…
     
  2. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #2
    Feb 26, 2012
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    Utakua hujampenda.... Pamoja na kusema wanandugu ni mhimu kuwahusisha haya maswala, the way you have presented hapa ni kana kwamba wana absolute say ya Mwanamke wa kumuoa. Naamini kama Kweli unampenda kwa dhati, ni lazima zipo tabia ambazo zimekuvutia kwake... tabia ambazo ungeweza zisimamia kwa kuzitaja na kumtetea Mpenzi wako kwa ndugu zako... Kwanza nashangaa nyie ni kabila gani for haya mambo sasa hivi ya kabila sio shida saana kama dini.

    Unadai sio mwelewa.... Ulitegemea nini? Afurahi? Hata mimi namuunga mkono... Naona ka vile wamzingua na hujampenda.
     
  3. Ndahani

    Ndahani JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Feb 26, 2012
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    Kama mmependana hiyo habari ya kabila inakujaje hapo? halafu maisha ya ndoa siyatakuwa ya kwenu. Au familia yako watakuwa ni washika dau wa moja kwa moja kwenye kuiendesha ndoa?
     
  4. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #4
    Feb 26, 2012
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    Good morning Ndahani... Vipi kanisani unaenda misaa ya ngapi? You know it is good once in a while kumkumbuka muumba.

    Unalionaje swala hili la Magnificent? From a Man's perspective na ukiangalia na makabila na other circumstances... Do you think anampenda huy mchumbake?
     
  5. Mangimeli

    Mangimeli JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Feb 26, 2012
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    sababu ni mchaga,kwa iyo wachaga ndio awatakiwi kuolewa?pelekeni ujinga wenu uko we na awo wanaokushauri ******
     
  6. fazaa

    fazaa JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Feb 26, 2012
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    Katika mambo ya kuoa ni muhimu kutazama pia kabila, si unavamia tu.

    Msisumbuke kunipiga swali hapo mana sita wajibu.
     
  7. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #7
    Feb 26, 2012
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    Fazaa unaniangusha jamani..... Dah! Nimeshindwa hata kukujulia hali maana umeahidi hutojibu...lol
     
  8. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

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    Feb 26, 2012
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    huwezi oa wewe
    bado mvulana
    huyo dada hajajua tu kuwa kamwepusha balaa la bure
     
  9. VUTA-NKUVUTE

    VUTA-NKUVUTE JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Feb 26, 2012
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    Tatizo la watu wengi ni kuifanya ndoa kuwa bidhaa ya familia au jumuiya fulani.Ndoa ni mke na mume.Basi.
     
  10. Ndechumia

    Ndechumia JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Feb 26, 2012
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    kwa mtindo huo kweli dada zetu wa kichagga wataolewa kweli?
    mbona watu wengine waoga sana wao wanataka wawapelekeshe akina mamae!! ambapo kumpelekesha au kumnyanyasa mwanamke wa kichagga mabae alishaamka tangu miaka ya hamsni ningmue!!!

    kama kweli ww magnificient(bila samahan km nimekosea jina lako) ni kidume tutajie kabila lako ambalo mnaogopa kuwaoa wachagga ili tua cess uwezo wenu wa kutafuta pesa. kama sijakosea ww ni lile kabila la kucheza ngoma Jan- Dec
     
  11. ITEGAMATWI

    ITEGAMATWI JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Feb 26, 2012
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    Hili tatizo huwa lipo na tena linachanganya sana kwakweli (Speaking from experience)!Familia zetu zingebadili mtazamo juu ya hili suala,huwa lina umiza sana hasa pale inapotokea mnapata matatizo then ndugu zako wote wanakususa!Ilinitokea kwa binti wa kipare ilibidi tu nimwache!!Huwa nikikumbuka inaniuma sana maana mara ya kwanza nilisema ngoja nizibe masikio lakini nilivyoona mpaka wakati mwingine nikiugua ndugu wananipotezea nikaona isiwe shida ngoja nikubali matakwa yao!!Sijui kwa ulimwengu wa sasa kama still tabia za kabila flani zinamata maana huu mchanganyikano wa makabila yetu si ajabu watu wengi hawajui na hawafuati hizo mila za makabila yao ambayo ni kikwazo kwa kabila lingine!!Tubadilikeni watz kabila kitu gani bwana??
     
  12. salito

    salito JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Feb 26, 2012
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    Mhhh wakina shimboni mpoo??
     
  13. Mirhea

    Mirhea JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Feb 26, 2012
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    Mi mwenyewe siwezi penda mwanaume legelege kama wewe. Yaani mpaka karne hii kwenye swala kama hili unafanyiwa maamuzi na wazazi. Shame on u mama's boy..
     
  14. kisukari

    kisukari JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Feb 26, 2012
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    na wewe mwenyewe inaonyesha huna msimamo.sababu wanazotoa wengine,kwa nini ukubaliane nazo?wewe si ndio unaemjua huyo dada?.nina mashemeji zangu 2 wa ki zanzibari,wameoa wachaga.watu walisema wee ila wao waliwaoa.ndoa zao ni zaidi ya miaka 10,na hao wamama wana roho nzuri ajabu.maisha ya ndoa,haijalishi kabila bali ni tabia ya mtu.na kwa hilo ukiwa unawekewa maamuzi na watu,huwezi kuishi na mke
     
  15. m

    mzabzab JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Feb 26, 2012
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    kinana mie nipo na wewe...kila kabila ona vijitabia vyake...na ukweli ni kwamba katika maisha ya ndoa amabapo utakaa na huyu mutu for years hivyo vijitabia vitajitokeza tuu. hivyo basi kama wewe huzipendi tabia fulani za wachanga na unaona zitaleta matatizo kwenye ndoa basi vizuri umuache tuu.....liaten ni wale wasio kuwa na uelewa ndio wanasema eti ukabila......yes ni ukabila na kila kabila zina culture zake hivyo kama unaona huzipendi then its prudent not to marry a peraon who has been brought up in such culture.
     
  16. mgeni10

    mgeni10 JF-Expert Member

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    Feb 26, 2012
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    Ni ukweli kwamba hakuwa anampenda , alimtamani , na amemaliza tamaa yake sasa anatafuta faraja kwa dhambi aliyomtendea huyu Binti

    Kumpotezea Muda na Dada wa watu ukute yeye aliwekeza moja kwa moja

    Ni Tatizo
     
  17. The Magnificent

    The Magnificent JF-Expert Member

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    Feb 26, 2012
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    ahsante mkuu,ooowkei tufanye basi nimemtamani ili ujione shujaa ...........umeshinda!!!!!!
     
  18. The Magnificent

    The Magnificent JF-Expert Member

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    Feb 26, 2012
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    nina msimamo kuliko hata huyo mumeo/mpenzio sema mimi siendeshwi na hisia zaidi kuliko kutumia akili.......nampenda sana mpenzi wangu lakini wazazi wangu ni zaidi yake mara100,mapenzi ya kijinga jinga ya kujifanya unaendekeza moyo wakati ndoa ni step muhimu sana kwenye maisha,mimi sina nafasi hiyo.....hapa nyie nisaidieni tu jinsi ya kuachana nae kwa amani!!
     
  19. The Magnificent

    The Magnificent JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Feb 26, 2012
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    huna ushauri hapa ndugu,bora ungekaa kimya tu mkuu
     
  20. The Magnificent

    The Magnificent JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Feb 26, 2012
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    sidhani kama umeoa/olewa wewe
     
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