Watoto wa kike na baba zao

[Gaijin]

Umenikumbusha baba yangu NK... baba alikua ananipenda saaana but bahati mbaya saana
nilikua sijui... wazazi wetu walikua na policy ya no child being favoured kuliko mwingine
(which i came to know after his death baada ya mon ku admit...) Hivyo alipofariki my mom
baada ya arobaini aliniita na kuniambia Asha i want you to know baba yako alikua anakupenda Mno!
Hakuna siku toka umezaliwa hajakutaja even just before he slept...

Wakati niko 18 nilipata mimba ya Jerk fulani hivi (kipindi hicho the love of my life na cause of existence....)
nikiwa kama the only gal na nilikua ni wa chini chini - najua si vizuri kuadmit hii kitu but the tensions i GOT,
Naamini ningetoa ile mimba na the wonderful daughter i have would have been history.. in short
sikua na guts za kutoa hio mimba! Nililazimika kuwambia wazazi am getting married. Making the long story short
Siku naondoka (ya harusi... yaani naenda kwa mme...) Baba yangu alilia kama mtoto mdogo kwa kelele kubwa
mno na for almost 15 minutes... ilinibidi nirudishwe nikaongea nae for an hour.... (but still sikuja kua ananipenda.. i was so selfish!)

Disturbing...

 

[Dr Lizzy]

Umenikumbusha baba yangu NK... baba alikua ananipenda saaana but bahati mbaya saananilikua sijui... wazazi wetu walikua na policy ya no child being favoured kuliko mwingine (which i came to know after his death baada ya mon ku admit...) Hivyo alipofariki my mombaada ya arobaini aliniita na kuniambia Asha i want you to know baba yako alikua anakupenda Mno!Hakuna siku toka umezaliwa hajakutaja even just before he slept... Wakati niko 18 nilipata mimba ya Jerk fulani hivi (kipindi hicho the love of my life na cause of existence....)nikiwa kama the only gal na nilikua ni wa chini chini - najua si vizuri kuadmit hii kitu but the tensions i GOT,Naamini ningetoa ile mimba na the wonderful daughter i have would have been history.. in shortsikua na guts za kutoa hio mimba! Nililazimika kuwambia wazazi am getting married. Making the long story shortSiku naondoka (ya harusi... yaani naenda kwa mme...) Baba yangu alilia kama mtoto mdogo kwa kelele kubwamno na for almost 15 minutes... ilinibidi nirudishwe nikaongea nae for an hour.... (but still sikuja kua ananipenda.. i was so selfish!)

Wow!!!Nimeguswa kweli partner...hongera kwa kufika ulipofikia.Shurly mzee huko aliko anatabasamu!!

 

[daughter]

Surely why should a girl be moulded into a man?

 

[AshaDii]

Disturbing...

I understand you being disturbed, but Ashadii would really appreciate knowing why...

 

[AshaDii]

Wow!!!Nimeguswa kweli partner...hongera kwa kufika ulipofikia.Shurly mzee huko aliko anatabasamu!!

Partner kwa nilipofika na the little i achieved thou not material...
I take it for Granted he is smiling on me...

Thank you dear kwa pongezi..

 

[Gaijin]

I understand you being disturbed, but Ashadii would really appreciate knowing why...

To me it's disturbing in so many different levels that I don't know where to begin but let me give it a try

Wakati niko 18 nilipata mimba ya Jerk fulani hivi

The capital J in jerk is disturbing knowing that you have a lovely daughter who I feel wouldn't like to hear her mom shouting it to the world that her dad is a Jerk with a capital J

And a picture of a grown man-probably nearing his 50s-crying like a kid for over 15 minutes with people hearing him is very much disturbing I would say

 

[AshaDii]

To me it's disturbing in so many different levels that I don't know where to begin but let me give it a try

The capital J in jerk is disturbing knowing that you have a lovely daughter
who I feel wouldn't like to hear her mom shouting it to the world that her dad is a Jerk with a capital J

And a picture of a grown man-probably nearing his 50s-crying like a kid for over 15 minutes with people hearing him is very much disturbing I would say

I appreciate the fact that you have responded.. Gaijin i call him J for aliniumiza na kuniangusha mno
he is the type of person (the only in fact...) ambae nikiongea na kukumbuka what he did to me
i have tears all over me (and am not easy on crying..), the things he did to me... sincerely sipendi
nikumbuke... it still has the power ya kuniumiza mpaka hapa katika keyboard.. i will appreciate
if yu leave it at that... sorry...

Baba yangu (may he rest in peace...) alikua 48 years old wakati huo.. and that is what makes
it saddenning na mimi kukubali kua i was that blind taking him for granted.. Dad ndo alinipa exposure
always made sure i was updated... I love movies, my first grown up movie is Mackena's Gold ya
Clint Eastwood, My first novel was when i was 10/11 known as Comfortable.. I think aliniandaa saana
akiamini eventually nikija settle it will be with a good man worth of me... ilikua the opposite
(if you don't mind my saying - i would call him an original slumd*).. i was the only daughter na
alikua akiamini binti anatakiwa aolewe akiwa 25 plus akiambatana na a good higher education..
Kulia kwake kila alie hudhuria that wedding is still the talk of it... and i hate it weneva anybody bring it up!

Sorry kwa maelezo marefu..

 

[Gaijin]

I appreciate the fact that you have responded.. Gaijin i call him J for aliniumiza na kuniangusha mno
he is the type of person (the only in fact...) ambae nikiongea na kukumbuka what he did to me
i have tears all over me (and am not easy on crying..), the things he did to me... sincerely sipendi
nikumbuke... it still has the power ya kuniumiza mpaka hapa katika keyboard.. i will appreciate
if yu leave it at that... sorry...

Baba yangu (may he rest in peace...) alikua 48 years old wakati huo.. and that is what makes
it saddenning na mimi kukubali kua i was that blind taking him for granted.. Dad ndo alinipa exposure
always made sure i was updated... I love movies, my first grown up movie is Mackena's Gold ya
Clint Eastwood, My first novel was when i was 10/11 known as Comfortable.. I think aliniandaa saana
akiamini eventually nikija settle it will be with a good man worth of me... ilikua the opposite
(if you don't mind my saying - i would call him an original slumd*).. i was the only daughter na
alikua akiamini binti anatakiwa aolewe akiwa 25 plus akiambatana na a good higher education..
Kulia kwake kila alie hudhuria that wedding is still the talk of it... and i hate it weneva anybody bring it up!

Sorry kwa maelezo marefu..

What's disturbing is you willingly and voluntarily talking about it. I wasn't the one to mention 'them' to begin with if I remember correctly.

And for calling him J and other names 'coz he gave you pain is understandable if you do it in the privacy of your own personal space, spitting venom about an unknown guy (to us) is very much disturbing.

(I'm not saying it is wrong, am just saying it is disturbing)

 

[AshaDii]

What's disturbing is you willingly and voluntarily talking about it. I wasn't the one to mention 'them' to begin with if I remember correctly.

And for calling him J and other names 'coz he gave you pain is understandable if you do it in the privacy of your own personal space, spitting venom about an unknown guy (to us) is very much disturbing.

(I'm not saying it is wrong, am just saying it is disturbing)

Gaijin unajua the good thing ya kusema jamvini ni nini??? You really don't give a damn if someone judges..

We are people behind this Avatars sometimes so different from the real person..
Watu wanizungukao... hawajui the real me hata kidogo kuliko hata hapa jamvini tokana na the fact kua
twaepusha kudharaulika, kua judged basing on your past life in relation na jinsi unavyoishi...
Siwezi ishi maisha a lie hata jamvini a lie??? i would be suffocating my self... ofcoz kuna vitu
basics naweza lie jamvin as wapi naishi, married or not, age, and the like but not my experience!!

Tumetofautiana personalities, kuna mtu hapa jamvini anataka aji paint kua yeye ni saint..
well i know I am not... na kuna mambo nimefanya ktk macho ya jamii yetu yakawa mabaya
but jamvini i don't mind what i expose for it is the only way i can express exactly how i feel
whether somebody loves/hates it... believes/do not believe..

The first post nilituma na ikakudisturb... i wanted to share kua ni moja wa mtoto wakike alokua
anapendwa na babake regardless alikua 48 but cried at my wedding thus the brief history..

You being disturbed that much has just given me an impression (sorry if am wrong..)
that unataka watu tusitoe personal experiences ambazo mtu hapendi...

Oh! and sorry for maelezo marefu, neva been able tu narrow it down!

 

[Chupaku]

I appreciate the fact that you have responded.. Gaijin i call him J for aliniumiza na kuniangusha mno
he is the type of person (the only in fact...) ambae nikiongea na kukumbuka what he did to me
i have tears all over me (and am not easy on crying..), the things he did to me... sincerely sipendi
nikumbuke... it still has the power ya kuniumiza mpaka hapa katika keyboard.. i will appreciate
if yu leave it at that... sorry...

Baba yangu (may he rest in peace...) alikua 48 years old wakati huo.. and that is what makes
it saddenning na mimi kukubali kua i was that blind taking him for granted.. Dad ndo alinipa exposure
always made sure i was updated... I love movies, my first grown up movie is Mackena's Gold ya
Clint Eastwood, My first novel was when i was 10/11 known as Comfortable.. I think aliniandaa saana
akiamini eventually nikija settle it will be with a good man worth of me... ilikua the opposite
(if you don't mind my saying - i would call him an original slumd*).. i was the only daughter na
alikua akiamini binti anatakiwa aolewe akiwa 25 plus akiambatana na a good higher education..
Kulia kwake kila alie hudhuria that wedding is still the talk of it... and i hate it weneva anybody bring it up!

Sorry kwa maelezo marefu..

Pole sana Ashadii. Ukitaka kunieleza mimi tuma PM tu. Kuna wakati mtu unataka tu kutoa upepo usikie nafuu. Kuna wanaume na wanawake wanakera sana na wameumiza watu kiasi kwamba unatamani Mungu angeweza kuwashushia kimondo muda huu!

 

[Mbimbinho]

Jamani mimi kuna kitu nime notice. Kuna baba nasoma nae ni mganda mtu mzima sana alichelewa kuoa na ana watoto watatu, last born wake ana miaka minne. Huyu baba alikuwa anatuambia juzi kuwa yeye hataki kabisa kabinti kake kachezee mwanasesele. Anasema tena hivi yuko na kaka zake, anamnunulia magari, mipira na bastora achezee ili asiwe na tabia za kike. Nikakumbuka baba yangu alikuwa anatuambia angependa sana mtoto wake wa kwanza, dada yetu angekuwa mwanaume kwani alikuwa anampenda sana. Na si kuwa hatukuwa na kaka tulikuwa nao.

Na mimi nikakumbuka malezi nilopewa na baba yangu. Alikuwa hataki kabisa tuwe legelege kama wanawake. Kwa mfano alikuwa ananambia hamna mtu anayeweza kuni beat darasani kwani wanawake na wanaume wote ni sawa. Na kweli nilikuwa napata bichwa basi darasani was always perfoming wonders just to please my dady kwani those early days sikujua hata umuhimu wa kusoma. Na imenifanya hata nilipokuwa college undergraduate kuwashangaa sana wasichana wanavyobanana kwa wanaume kuomba msaada wa kufundishwa hata bila kujua viwango vyao vya uelewa. Yaani utakuta wote mko first year hamjajua bado nani kichwa lakini mabinti wanawaaminia wavulana kuwa ndio wenye akili kumbe kuna wadada wenye akili pia.

Kwa baba yangu ilikuwa hata kumwambia baba nimepata mchumba unafikiria mara mbili maana tulishamsoma alikuwa hapendi tuwe under anybody's control.

Sasa haya malezi yamenifanya mfano mie niwe less femine. I rarely see the difference between me and men zaidi ya sex. Swali langu ni kweli wababa wengi mnapenda mabinti zenu wawe na tabia za kiume? Kama ndio kwa nini? Je kuna binti ambae ameshapata same treatment toka kwa baba yake au mumewe ana treat binti zake hivi?

Sijaelewa bado ww ni HE or She? ansa plz then ntarudi kuchangia..!!:msela:

 

[Nyani Ngabu]

Kuna dalili za ligi isiyo na kombe!

 

[Gaijin]

You being disturbed that much has just given me an impression (sorry if am wrong..)
that unataka watu tusitoe personal experiences ambazo mtu hapendi...

On the contorary I LOVE when people put no brakes to what they say over the internet. As you have put it, whats the point of living a lie in a place like this?
'But that still doesn't erase the fact that some things people share on the internet (should I say some peoples' emotions) are pretty disturbing. And saying that they are disturbing just proves that freedom of expressing ourselves we have here-real reactions and emotions in the open for everybody to see. No sugarcoating nothing

 

[Gaijin]

Kuna dalili za ligi isiyo na kombe!

You still using this ID? well yeah it wasn't in the list you gave that day :]

 

[Chupaku]

Umenikumbusha Baba yangu alipolia sana dada yetu alipoolewa hadi alitoka nje ya ukumbi. Kumbe alimpenda sana ngoja nikamwambie....

Wababa wengi wana experience ya maisha - As MEN. wanajua walivyodanganya wengi, walivyotapeli wengi, na hata yale ambayo wanayaongea katika vijiwe. Hakuna mwanaume atapenda binti yake awe kama ifuatavyo:
1. Awe legelege na dependent to men - ateseke
2. Awe hana elimu anyanyasike (mahausigeli, ma secretary, etc) aombwe rushwa ya ngono apate kazi au abakwe, awe vulnerable
3. Awe hajiamini - asiwe na confidence cos men will take advantage of her.
Ndiyo maana wanasema - be like a Man, do this or that. There is no fear like seeing your daughter growing up and become a prey of men because of circumnstances which can be avoided.
Therefore the rule is:
Daddies make daughters strong while Mummies make sons soft to become good husbands. Thats natural.

 

[AshaDii]

Pole sana Ashadii. Ukitaka kunieleza mimi tuma PM tu. Kuna wakati mtu unataka tu kutoa upepo usikie nafuu. Kuna wanaume na wanawake wanakera sana na wameumiza watu kiasi kwamba unatamani Mungu angeweza kuwashushia kimondo muda huu!

Chupaku Asante saana dear... really appreciated...
But sasa nipo mahali pazuri na nina amani saana for i never regret
experiences zangu... i learn from them.. hivyo naamini no need of
a PM but will have that in mind weneva i need someone to lean on.

Pamoja saana.

 

[Tutor B]

Katika jamii tunayoishi, mtu yeyote akiwa na tabia za kujilegeza tunasema tabia za kikekike. Akiwa na tabia za ukakamavu na kujisimamia tunasema tabia za kiume. Hiyo imejengeka katika vichwa vya wengi. Hivyo mzazi kutaka mtoto wa kike awe mkakamavu na mwenye kijisimamia sio vibaya. Hayo ni maoni yangu kwa leo.

 

[Nyani Ngabu]

You still using this ID? well yeah it wasn't in the list you gave that day :]

What day and what are you talking about?Do you believe everything people say about themselves? Especially in this kind of an environment? But never mind coz there's a sucker born every minute!

 

[Chupaku]

Chupaku Asante saana dear... really appreciated...
But sasa nipo mahali pazuri na nina amani saana for i never regret
experiences zangu... i learn from them.. hivyo naamini no need of
a PM but will have that in mind weneva i need someone to lean on.

Pamoja saana.

No worries. Experiences are a good teacher. Kila la kheri!

 

[AshaDii]

On the contorary I LOVE when people put no brakes to what they say over the internet. As you have put it, whats the point of living a lie in a place like this?
'But that still doesn't erase the fact that some things people share on the internet (should I say some peoples' emotions) are pretty disturbing. And saying that they are disturbing just proves that freedom of expressing ourselves we have here-real reactions and emotions in the open for everybody to see. No sugarcoating nothing

Kwanza nashukuru the fact ulikua Disturbed and commented...
ulikua na option ya kuignore(that i would not have liked..)

In some way (in fact more than 70%..) naamini na kukubali uloongea... Just didn't get why...
Kama kujieleza nafikiri nimejieleza vya kutosha in words too many na nimeamini kweli you
were disturbed for it seems you have read and responded all thou we share a different angle..
Kuna member ana comment.. you respond but anasepa...

In courtesy of one of the most respected man I quote...

"What shall I say? Everything that I could say would fade into insignificance
compared with what my heart feels,
and your hearts feel, at this moment"

- Pope John Paul II (Polish Pope 1920 – 2005)


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