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Wasifu wa marehemu

Discussion in 'Jokes/Utani + Udaku/Gossips' started by IrDA, Dec 6, 2011.

  1. IrDA

    IrDA JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Dec 6, 2011
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    Mwenyekiti wa kamati ya mazishi akainuka na kusema, "kinachofuata sasa ndugu wafiwa na marafiki wa marehemu ni kusoma historia fupi ya marehemu tuliyemzika hapa leo, karibu ndugu uliyeandaliwa kwa shughuli hiyo..."


    Msomaji: "Ifuatayo in historia fupi ya marehemu tuliyemlaza ktk nyumba ya milele hapa leo...


    >Marehemu alizaliwa juu ya mti ambapo mzazi wake alijihifadhi baada ya kukimbia mafuriko miaka 26 iliyopita.


    >Hakubahatika kupata kazi ya maana alisoma mpaka darasa la 3 tu ambapo aliamua kuacha shule baada ya kuona elimu haina mpango kwake.


    > Marehemu alikuwa kero kwa familia yake hasa kwa tabia yake chafu ya udokozi, uongo, uvutaji bangi, ubakaji wa mifugo na baadae ushoga.


    > Mimi binafsi mjomba wake nimefurahishwa sana na kifo cha marehemu huyu kwani alishawahi kunipakazia kuwa nimekufa kwa kipindupindu kiasi kwamba ndugu wote wakakusanyika na kunililia msiba huku yeye akikusanya fedha za rambi rambi na kukimbia nazo!!


    > Mtoto alitutia hasara sana kwani alikuwa mwizi wa vitu vya ndani,pesa,ndala na viatu mpaka vya wageni, nguo zozote zikianikwa nje na hata mboga jikoni. Hapa nilipo, mimi na mke wangu hatuna hata nguo za ndani kwani alishaniibia zote..


    >Pia tumepoteza gharama kibao kumtafutia vyuo vya ufundu lakini aliishia kula ada na mwisho wa siku kuwa shoga tangu tarehe 06/04/91 hivyo ana expirience ya miaka 20 ya USHOGA.


    > Marehemu hakuugua bali kifo chake ni cha kujitakia kwani kajiua kwa kunywa sumu ya panya baada ya kukosa nauli ya kwenda Mombasa kuhudhuria onyesho la taarabu na mduara.


    > Kwa niaba ya familia, wazazi na ndugu wa marehemu tunatoa pongezi kwa Mungu kwa kutupunguzia kero na kwa wote wanaomdai marehemu mtatusamehe kwani hatuna uwezo wa kuwalipa kwa sababu tunajua ghalama yake itakuwa kubwa ila msihofu atawalipa mkikutana peponi.


    >Ndugu wote wa marehemu tunamuomba sana Mungu asiilaze roho ya marehemu peponi na wala asimpumzishe kwa amani ila kama kuna mkong'oto huko ampe wa kutosha na kama ni moto awe kuni kabisa kwa shida alizotuletea duniani.. "


    WOTE TUSEME AMEN!!!
     
  2. IrDA

    IrDA JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Dec 6, 2011
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    ‎Mvuta Bangi karudi kwake usiku akamkuta mkewe kalala na Chupi yenye kimkanda tu kwa nyuma{BIKINI} Jamaa akaanza kucheka sana mpaka mkewe akaamka akamuulza unacheka nn? Jamaa akamjibu ndo mara yangu ya kwanza kuona matak-o yamevaa kandambili
     
  3. U

    Ulimakafu JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Dec 6, 2011
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    Kazi kubwa.
     
  4. T

    THK DJAYZZ JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Dec 8, 2011
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    >>> Marehemu alikuwa mwadilifu pia mchapa kazi. Kwani hakuwa mvivu kama vile vijana wengine mlivyo. Aliipenda familia yake kwa moyo wa dhati wala hakuwa mwasherati.
    {Kumbe waongo watupu}
     
  5. KANCHI

    KANCHI JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Dec 8, 2011
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    Haya bana!! mie napita 2.
     
  6. T

    THK DJAYZZ JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Dec 8, 2011
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    Ipi hiyo ?
     
  7. DAWA YA SIKIO

    DAWA YA SIKIO JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Dec 9, 2011
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    .... Nahisi kaburi lake lilikuwa na urefu wa futi moja na nusu. Na alizikwa na mashoga wenzake,pamoja na mwakilishi mmoja wa
    wanandugu kama shuhuda ili kujua mtu wao kazikwa!
     
  8. T

    THK DJAYZZ JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Dec 9, 2011
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    Khaaa !
     
  9. MUREFU

    MUREFU JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Dec 9, 2011
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    duuu! Huyu marehemu cjui aliwafanya nini kibaya nduguze kama ndo hv kha!
     
  10. m

    mbambaguy JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Dec 9, 2011
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    teh teh teh eh eh hee daah ni nomaaa huo wasifu!
     
  11. L

    Luthar JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Dec 10, 2011
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    mbavu zangu jaman khaaaa
     
  12. v

    valid statement JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Dec 10, 2011
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    marehemu wanasifiwaga tu... hata kama hakutenda mema mengi, basi yale mazuri machache ndiyo tunayotakiwa tuyaongee.
     
  13. DEVINE

    DEVINE JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Dec 10, 2011
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    Alizaliwa bahati mbaya kafa makusudi.
     
  14. O

    Ong'waLugandu Member

    #14
    Dec 10, 2011
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    duh! mjomba mtu nomaa!
     
  15. Duble Chris

    Duble Chris JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Dec 10, 2011
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    weeeeeeeeee watu kama hawa huzikwa zaidi ya futi 6
    futi 1 akifufuka awasumbue
     
  16. m

    malaika2 Member

    #16
    Dec 16, 2011
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    Hyo tumeizoea!
     
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