Dismiss Notice
You are browsing this site as a guest. It takes 2 minutes to CREATE AN ACCOUNT and less than 1 minute to LOGIN

Usiwe king'ang'anizi...soma alama za nyakati!!

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Lizzy, Mar 14, 2011.

  1. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: May 25, 2009
    Messages: 22,194
    Likes Received: 122
    Trophy Points: 160
    Kuna wakati unaweza kumkuta mtu yupo kwenye mahusiano yenye kila aina ya karaha na unyanyasaji lakini bado yupo tu na wala hafikirii kuondoka.Unakuta mtu anatukanwa...anapigwa...anadharauliwa...yani kwa ujumla anaonyeshwa kila dalili za kuchokwa ama kutotakwa tena lakini anaamua kufa kibudi.Uvumilivu ni muhimu kwenye mahusiano...ila pia inabidi tujifunze kusoma alama za nyakati.Kuna vitu ambavyo mwenzi wako akianza kuvifanya tena kwa kuvirudia rudia unatakiwa ujue kwamba hapa sitakikani tena na utafute jinsi ya kujitoa.Ndio maana wahenga walisema ''akufukuzae hakwambii ondoka.'' Mara nyingi mtu atakufanyia visa akijua kwamba ukivichoka utaondoka mwenyewe...kumbe kuna wale wenzangu na mie wanaoamini na kujipa moyo wa mabadiliko hata pasipo na moyo...unavumilia manyanyaso ukijua kesho itakua bora ya jana alafu matokeo yake jana inageuka bora ya leo pale unapovunjwa moyo kabisa.

    Na hii ni zaidi kwa sisi kina dada!!Jamani embu tujifunze kusema inatosha na tuache kua ving'ang'anizi.Jiamini kwamba ulivyompata huyo ndivyo ambavyo utampata mwingine.Usiishi kwa mateso kwa wasiwasi wa kutokupendwa tena kwasababu hujui kuna kizuri gani kinakusubiria huko nje ila hakiwezi kujitokeza bila wewe kuweka hiyo nafasi wazi!Hamna mtu anaestahili kulala akilia kila siku au kutokua na furaha kwasababu ya binadamu mwenzake.Ukiona mtu hakufai achana nae...usimpe mtu mwingine nafasi ya kucontroll maisha yako ....hiyo ni kazi yako.Ukitaka furaha itafute....ukikereka na kuchoka huzuni ikimbie!!!

    Usisubiri kuvunjwa moyo uokote vipande....ondoka na moyo wako mzima ukatafute atakaeupa furaha na amani!!

    So does not matter how much it pains (time heals) ni bora uondoke mapema na kujijenga mwenyewe.., because you should never depend on someone else for your happiness you must be a King/Queen to your own castle so its true "If he cant learn to love you, you should leave him" sababu life is too short and the time you spend na huzuni with someone can be spent better with someone else who know your value.., and they are a lot people out there who will value you more hata kama hakuna ni bora kukaa peke yako kuliko na mzigo wa matatizo........BY J!!
     
  2. Maty

    Maty JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: Aug 24, 2010
    Messages: 2,170
    Likes Received: 1
    Trophy Points: 0
    Liz my dia ni ngumu sana kwetu kujiondoa hasa kwa mpenzi unaempenda kwa mara ya kwanza lakini ukishaachana nae wanaokuja unakua unamvizia tu akianza unajiondoa mapema kabisa, lakini kama ndio kwanza unayaanza mapenzi ni ngumu sana asee
     
  3. CPU

    CPU JF Gold Member

    #3
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: Jan 13, 2011
    Messages: 3,871
    Likes Received: 7
    Trophy Points: 135
    My Dia

    Hao waliojifunga ktk ndoa sijui watakimbiaje?
     
  4. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: May 25, 2009
    Messages: 22,194
    Likes Received: 122
    Trophy Points: 160
    Ni ngumu kweli mpendwa ila huwezi kua na matumaini pasipo matumaini....matokeo yake utakuja kuachwa wakati nguvu zako zote ulimalizia kwenye kusubiri na kuamini mtu atabadilika alafu hata kuamka kitandani!!!Ni bora ujikaze ...ikibidi unatafuta ujasiri kwa watu wako wa karibu uweze kuacha kabla ya kuachwa maana maumivu ya kuachwa na mtu ambae umetumia muda wako mwingi kuamini matendo yake sio makusudi alafu anakuja kukuacha kana kwamba hukua lolote kwako yatakua maradufu!!
     
  5. muhosni

    muhosni JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: Feb 12, 2011
    Messages: 1,114
    Likes Received: 3
    Trophy Points: 0
    Lizzy my friend, not as easy as you think. Hata hivyo muktadha wa uandishi wako unaonekana kuna live case unajaribu kuiwakilisha hapa. Pengine kwa kadhia hiyo unayoiandikia ushauri wako una apply lakini nasita ku-generalize kihivyo.

    Hujambo lakini?
     
  6. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: May 25, 2009
    Messages: 22,194
    Likes Received: 122
    Trophy Points: 160
    Kwani ndoa kazi yake ni nini kama sio kutafuta furaha na maliwazo???Kama ndoa inampa mtu kinyume cha anachohitaji na dalili za mabadiliko hamna ni bora kuikimbia kabla mtu hajachanganyikiwa kwa msongo wa mawazo.Maana ikishatokea hivyo hutokua faida kwenye hiyo ndoa wala hiyo ndoa haitakua faida kwako!!!!
     
  7. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: May 25, 2009
    Messages: 22,194
    Likes Received: 122
    Trophy Points: 160

    No one said it was!!!Hata kifo sio kirahisi ila tunakabiliana nacho na kushinda....achilia mbali kumuacha mwanadamu ukijua fika kuna nafasi na uwezekano wa kupata mwingine ambae ni bora zaidi!!!Sasa huo ugumu unaouona kwenye kuachana na mtu mnyanyasaji linganisha na uvumilivu wako utakapolipwa kwa kifo...msongo wa mawazo...huzuni za kila siku uone kipi chenye uzito zaidi.Ni wakati watu waache kufikiria leo tu.....matokeo ya vitu nnavyoongelea hapa hua yanakua mabaya kuliko unavyoweza kufikiri.Na mtu asipofikiria ''kipigo kikiendelea ipo siku ntauwawa'' atajikuta wakati anatamani angeondoka ni too late!!!Mtu ambae hukuzaliwa nae unaweza kuisha bila....sasa kisa cha kung'ang'ania sehemu unayoona dhahiri hutakikani ni nini haswa????

    Nwyz mi mzima wa afyaaa!!!Vipi wewe???
     
  8. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: Oct 18, 2008
    Messages: 16,275
    Likes Received: 115
    Trophy Points: 160
    Lizzy,

    Kila jambo lina chimbuko lake ila siyo kila kitu kinawezekana na hasa hasa kama kiini cha tatizo hakifahamiki.

    Bahati mbaya hakuna formula moja inayokubalika katika kuendesha maisha yetu ya kila siku. Wapo waliosubiri na matatizo yakaisha ila pia wapo waliosubiri na kupoteza maisha kabisa. Auntie yangu ni mmoja wapo.

    Tatizo kubwa ni kwamba watu wengi wanakosa ushauri nasaha ili wapate ujasiri wa kuamua na kutenda. Sina hakika wewe mwenyewe mdogo wangu Lizzy uko upande gani. Hata hivyo ni ngumu kutabiri hatua gani unaweza kuchukua hadi masahibu yenyewe yakufike.

    Namshukuru Mungu bado nadunda na na-enjoy game ya maisha!
     
  9. muhosni

    muhosni JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: Feb 12, 2011
    Messages: 1,114
    Likes Received: 3
    Trophy Points: 0
    Lizzy mamaa, mimi mzima, nimekumisi!

    Sasa natoautiana na wewe vile unavyotafsiri tatizo na unavyolipatia ufumbuzi.

    Life is not roses either way, needs constant struggle and adjustment. Sikubaliani na wewe kwamba ufumbuzi pekee kwa kadhia unayoieleza ni mwanamke kuondoka. There are many other ways and I have evidence they work.

    Inatakiwa tuwasaidie wahusika kwa kuelewa bila kubahatisha tatizo halisi. What if tatizo ni huyo mwanamke? Kwa nini huna option ya upatanisho?

    Hakuna ndoa ambazo hazipiti rough times. Tukitekeleza ushauri wako kwa pupa, tutakuwa tunaachana na kuoana kila mwaka.

    Pia katika ndoa there are more than the two of you!
     
  10. Bigirita

    Bigirita JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: Feb 12, 2007
    Messages: 13,582
    Likes Received: 332
    Trophy Points: 180
    Lizzy,
    Nakubaliana na wewe kama kuna kupigwa na kunyasana. Either way, manyanyaso sio mazuri. Swala la kuacha, kupiga moyo konde sio jambo rahisi la kufuata moyo wako kirahisi. Japo kutafuta furaha ni muhimu, hujui kitakachokuja mbele. Furaha inaweza kugeuka upweke na kuanza kuangalia nyuma.

    Inatokea, watu wanaachana kwa mwaka na wanarudiana tena. Nasupport pande zote as far as njia zote zimeangaliwa uzuri.
     
  11. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: Oct 18, 2008
    Messages: 16,275
    Likes Received: 115
    Trophy Points: 160
    Kweli mkuu,

    Huwezi kuachia nchi kirahisi. Ingekuwa hivyo Mubaraka angeondoka toka siku ya kwanza. Hata Gadafi naye angeshakuwa historia. Wakati mwingine ni vizuri kupambana hadi tone la mwisho la damu! Tatizo ni pale ambapo huyo anayepigana hana dira wala mwelekeo na kwa hiyo hata hajui uelekeo wa kupeleka makombora yake!
     
  12. nnunu

    nnunu JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: Mar 4, 2011
    Messages: 656
    Likes Received: 5
    Trophy Points: 0
    maisha kwa wanandoa yasiyo na furaha na amani kwa 100% ni mabaya sana,,lakin pia suala la kuachana siyo jambo rahisi kiasi hicho hasa kwa wanandoa MAKINI ukizingatia ndoa ina viambata vingi ndani yake...ila ukiwa nje ya ndoa unaweza kuona rahisi kuachana lakin ukiwa ndani mmmh ni vigumu sana kuachana,,,na ndiyo maana inasisitizwa kuwa kuachana iwe ni maamuzi ya wanandoa wenyewe tu. NA ndoa siku zote ni mchanganyiko wa ASALI NA SHUBIRI so wanandoa lazima muwe tayari kukabiliana yote,,,kila jambo lina chanzo na sababu zake kwa hiyo kabla ya kuachana lazima mjiulize nini chanzo cha matatizo yenu,,na je HAYATATULIKI KWELI??,,,kwa sababu pasipo kujua chanzo ya tatizo na kujaribu kulitatua yawezekana kuachana isiwe suluhisho la matatizo yenu...ILA PIA SIYO VIZURI WANANDOA KUISHI PAMOJA PASIPO UPENDO ETI KWA SABABU YA WATOTO hili sikubaliano nalo mkubali kuishi kwa7bu MNAPENDANA NA MPO TAYARI KUYATATUA MATATIZO PINDI YANAPOTOKEA.....MAISHA MAFUPI SANA JAMANI HEBU TUJARIBU KUISHI YA KUJALIANA,KUTHAMINIANA,KUFARIJIANA,KUFURAHISHANA,KUPENDANA ILI HATA TUKIFA TUFE TUKIWA TUMETABASAMU.......
     
  13. Dena Amsi

    Dena Amsi JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: Aug 17, 2010
    Messages: 13,139
    Likes Received: 206
    Trophy Points: 160
    Ha ha ha Lizzy bana umeamua kunichana live (tangu nikupe story ya shem wako vile ananinyanyasa na nashindwa kumwacha).

    Kuacha/kuachwa pale unapopendwa/unapopenda ni shughuli pevu aisee
     
  14. Husninyo

    Husninyo JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: Oct 24, 2010
    Messages: 23,718
    Likes Received: 395
    Trophy Points: 180
    Ukweli mtupu.
    Watu tunasubiri hadi tuambiwe ondoka sikutaki.
    Ukishaona matendo hayaeleweki bora kuchapa lapa mapema.
     
  15. W

    Wakuchakachua JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: Nov 2, 2010
    Messages: 346
    Likes Received: 0
    Trophy Points: 0
    more than good
     
  16. kisukari

    kisukari JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: Jul 16, 2010
    Messages: 3,307
    Likes Received: 504
    Trophy Points: 280
    jamani kuandika ni rahisi,lakini kuchukua maamuzi huwa ni vigumu sana,sijui hatujiamini?au ilimradi tufurahishe jamii,maana saa nyengine utasemwa na wa nje weeeeee,au vumilia tu,muombe mungu tu,mwisho unaletewa gonjwa ndani.mifano mingi ipo,kama hayajakukuta,utasem"yule nae ingekuwa mimi ningeshamuacha zamani".lakini yakija kukuta huchukui uamuzu huo,
     
  17. Gaga

    Gaga JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Mar 14, 2011
    Joined: Jan 6, 2011
    Messages: 4,564
    Likes Received: 15
    Trophy Points: 0
    Yaani nahisi kama ni mimi vile, kuacha mtu sio rahisi liz yaani hasa kama umekulia familia watu wote wako na waume/wake zao. tatizo letu waafrica we believe in family inakuwa ngumu kwenda kuanzisha family na mtu mwingine,pia ile assurance kwamba nikitoka huyo mwingine nae atkuwa perfect?? au ndio kuruka mkojo kukanyaga m...???hapo ukifikiria mara mbili unatuliza ****** chini aisee.
    Ni ushauri mzuri ila unataka ushujaa na ukakamavu. kuacha mke/mume ni shughuli pevu
     
  18. Maty

    Maty JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Mar 15, 2011
    Joined: Aug 24, 2010
    Messages: 2,170
    Likes Received: 1
    Trophy Points: 0


    Tena pevu hasa na sa nyingine kama walivyosema wengine hapo juu unaweza ukamuacha ukampata mwenye matatizo zaidi ya yule uliemuacha matokeo yake majuto inatakiwa busara sana sana katika hili na sio kukurupuka asee ingawa maranyingi huwa ni ngumu kumesa
     
  19. kilimasera

    kilimasera JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Mar 15, 2011
    Joined: Dec 2, 2009
    Messages: 3,072
    Likes Received: 9
    Trophy Points: 135
    Lizzy hii ipo hata kwa wanaume pia ila sasa unakuta vituko hivyo vinatokea tayari mmekwishakua na watoto sasa kwa hali kama hiyo utafanyeje na mmeisha zaa watoto!
     
  20. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Mar 15, 2011
    Joined: Oct 18, 2008
    Messages: 16,275
    Likes Received: 115
    Trophy Points: 160
    Ni kweli Maty, hii kitu si rahis kama anavyosema Lizzy. Katika theory yuko sahihi. Ila katika utekelezaji sina hakika hata kama yeye mwenyewe angeweza kufanya hivyo haraka. Dalili za mtu wa hovyo huwa ziko wazi ingawa watu wengi hujipa Moyo kwamba Mungu atatenda miujiza. Madhara ya kuishi na viroba vya namna hiyo ni makubwa sana. Auntie yangu aliuawa na mume wake aliyemtandika kwa nguvu sana siku kama 5 hivi baada ya kujifungua!

    Laiti mawazo ya Lizzy yangekuwa yanatekelezeka, watu wengi wangeishi kwa amani saaaana!!
     
Loading...