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Usicheze na kugeuzwa!

Discussion in 'Jokes/Utani + Udaku/Gossips' started by Kanyafu Nkanwa, Sep 10, 2010.

  1. K

    Kanyafu Nkanwa JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Sep 10, 2010
    Joined: Jul 8, 2010
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    Joe wanted to buy a motorbike. He doesn't have much luck until, one day,
    he comes across a Harley with a 'for sale' sign on it.

    The bike seems even better than a new one, although it is 10 years old. It
    is shiny and in absolute mint condition. He immediately buys it, and asks
    the seller how he kept it in such great condition for 10 years.

    "Well, it's quite simple, really," says the seller, "whenever the bike is
    outside and it's going to rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome. It protects it
    from the rain." And he hands Joe a jar of Vaseline.

    That night, his girlfriend, Sandra, invites him over to meet her parents.
    Naturally, they take the bike there.

    But just before they enter the house, Sandra stops him and says, "I have
    to tell you something about my family before we go in."

    "When we eat dinner, we don't talk. In fact, the first person who says
    anything during dinner has to do the dishes."

    "No problem," he says. And in they go.

    Joe is shocked. Right smack in the middle of the living room is a huge
    stack of dirty dishes. In the kitchen is another huge stack of dishes.
    Piled up on the stairs, in the corridor, everywhere he looks, dirty
    dishes.

    They sit down to dinner and, sure enough, no one says a word.

    As dinner progresses, Joe decides to take advantage of the situation. So
    he leans over and kisses Sandra. No one says a word. So he reaches over
    and fondles her breasts.

    Still, nobody says a word. So he stands up, grabs her, rips her clothes
    off, throws her on the table, and screws her right there, in front of her
    parents. His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid,
    and her mom horrified when he sits back down, but no one says a word.

    He looks at her mom. "She's got a great body," he thinks. So he grabs the
    mom, bends her over the dinner table, and has his way with her every which
    way right there on the dinner table. Now his girlfriend is furious and her
    dad is boiling, but still, total silence.

    All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder, and it starts to rain.

    Joe remembers his bike, so he pulls the jar of Vaseline from his pocket.

    Suddenly the father backs away from the table and shouts, "All right,
    thats enough, I'll do the fucking dishes!"
     
  2. Bourgeoisie

    Bourgeoisie JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Sep 10, 2010
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    Eeeeebanaaaaaaaa,
     
  3. Consigliere

    Consigliere JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Sep 10, 2010
    Joined: Sep 9, 2010
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    Acha kutudanganya banaaaa!!
    Comedy yako ingebamba sana ungei-present kivingine, but kuhusisha wazazi.... thats very disgisting.
     
  4. Homo Habilis

    Homo Habilis Senior Member

    #4
    Sep 10, 2010
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    its joke tu...kwani wao hawajui au hawafanyagi?
     
  5. K

    Kanyafu Nkanwa JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Sep 11, 2010
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    Iko mwake hasa. wewe mzazi nini? Itakutokea hiyo
     
  6. Katavi

    Katavi Platinum Member

    #6
    Sep 11, 2010
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    Ahahaaaaaah du hii imetulia, na hiyo familia ina kanuni za ajabu!!!! lol.
     
  7. k

    kiber Member

    #7
    Sep 11, 2010
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    it doesnt make any sense! yaani haichekeshi
     
  8. K

    Kanyafu Nkanwa JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Sep 12, 2010
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    It will never unless you have the right senses.
     
  9. Raia Fulani

    Raia Fulani JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Sep 12, 2010
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    Umenibamba mwayego
     
  10. Saint Ivuga

    Saint Ivuga JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Sep 18, 2010
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    wewe jamaa ungekuwa ndio dingi ungefanyaje? Ungkausha?
     
  11. Natty Bongoman

    Natty Bongoman JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Sep 18, 2010
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    hahaa... dingi kastuswa na mafuta... hawa familia wapuuzi - mie ka ngekuwa dingi, jamaa angepondwa kimya kimya alipomshika mamsap...
     
  12. Utamaduni

    Utamaduni JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Sep 18, 2010
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    Lol,
    Kama haujacheka, lazima utakuwa umekorofishana na mwenza wako home,l as for me nimecheka, thats the mkeaning ya kichekesho akicheka mmoja tu inatosha,
    Lol
     
  13. komedi

    komedi JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Apr 4, 2011
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    Loh salale kumbe ndo maana jamaa fulani wamegoma kule UK kwa sababu Vaseline imepanda bei!!!
     
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