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Ushauri wangu katika mahusiano yaliyovunjika

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Michelle, Feb 20, 2011.

  1. Michelle

    Michelle JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Feb 20, 2011
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    Natumai wote ni wazima katika siku zangu chache hapa Jamii Forums.

    Hasa Jukwaa la Mahusiano Mapenzi na Urafiki nimegundua jambo ambalo naona ni vizuri nikasema ninavyoliona;


    Ukisoma katikati ya mistari ya baadhi ya threads zetu utagundua kuwa kuna baadhi yetu tumekuwa na mahusiano yasiyo mazuri na yaliyotuumiza sana na pengine kutufanya tujione hatuna thamani au wanaume wote/wanawake wote ni wabaya.

    Kuna baadhi ya watu wanatafuta wapenzi au wenzi wa maisha wa jinsia tofauti,lakini hiyo chuki aliyonayo au dharau inakuonyesha wazi kwamba huyo mtu bado hajasamehe au kumuondoa Yule aliyemuumiza kwenye akili yake,kwa hiyo anatafuta pa kupunguzia maumivu yake au frustrations zake,mara wanawake hawaeleweki,wanaume wote waongo,wanawake wanapenda hela tu.

    Ushauri wangu:
    Moja, tuwe tunachukua muda baada ya kuvunjika au katika kipindi kigumu cha mahusiano,kutafakari yale tuliyokutana nayo,wapi tulikosea au wapi tulitendewa visivyo na tujiulize kwa nini?

    Pili,kukimbilia uhusiano mwingine hakutakuondolea maumivu au chuki uliyonayo,you are likely to be hurt again even more,take time to heal,upone vidonda vyako then urudishe imani kuwa wapo wanawake/wanaume wazuri na unaweza kuwa nao,jiamini na kuwa mvumilivu,maisha si lelemama,na hauko peke yako uliyokutana na hali hiyo.

    Tatu,tuepuke kuwaumiza wasiostahili,unakuta mtu kaumizwa na mwanamke/mwanaume anatafuta msichana au mvulana anamdanganya kuwa anampenda kumbe ili aweze kulala nae na baadaye anamfanyia vituko na kumuacha kwa kuwa hakuwa na nia tangu mwanzoni,Hii ni dhambi na roho ya mtu inayolia kwa ajili yako ni laana.Tuepuke sana kuwaliza watu wasiostahili.Tuwe wazi,mwambie you are just passing time.

    Take enough time to deal with your emotional works and heal your wounds, have a honest conversation with yourself before starting a new relationship.

    Keep up loving yourself, keep up the faith and just be happy.Exhale, embrace, enjoy and if you're finding it tough today, remember this day shall pass and don't get hijacked by your feelings.Life is not a fairytale.
     
  2. papag

    papag JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Feb 20, 2011
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    ahsante sana MIchelle na MUNGU akubariki:drum::drum:
     
  3. muhosni

    muhosni JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Feb 20, 2011
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    Umenena mama, I salute you!

    Leo ulikuwa kimya kumbe ulikuwa unatunga mistari makini hivi bana, chaa!
     
  4. SG8

    SG8 JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Feb 20, 2011
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    Busara tupu. Nakubaliana na wewe kwa kiasi kikubwa kuwa wengi wetu tukijikwaa, tunakimbilia conclusion kwamba wote wapo hivyo au sitaki tena mwanamke au sioi tena. Kwa kuwa kila mtu ana hisia zake,matamanio yake na muono wake, ni vyema ukipata tatizo jipange,tafakari kwa busara kisha take easy kwamba haya ndo maisha na yanaendelea bila huyo aliyekutndea ndivyo sivyo badala ya kufikiria kulipa kisasi kwqa mtu mwingine
     
  5. Michelle

    Michelle JF-Expert Member

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    Amen,Mungu akubariki pia!
     
  6. Michelle

    Michelle JF-Expert Member

    #6
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    ha ha ha....thank you!
     
  7. muhosni

    muhosni JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Feb 20, 2011
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    Karibu
     
  8. Michelle

    Michelle JF-Expert Member

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    Nashukuru umeliona hilo,kuna mahusiano mengine tangu mwanzo it was a mistake tumejikwaa,lakini badala ya kuutafakari uhusiano na kujifunza tunakimbilia kwenye conclusion ngumu ambazo zinatugharimu pia kwa kiasi kikubwa.....life has to go on as you said!!
     
  9. Lokissa

    Lokissa JF-Expert Member

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    Feb 20, 2011
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    upo sawa michelle, tatizo ni ubinadamu zaidi na tumejawa na roho za visasi na kutoheshimu hisia za wenzetu.i wish wasichana wote wangekuwa na upeo kama wako dunia ingekuwa paradiso ua upendo
     
  10. St. Paka Mweusi

    St. Paka Mweusi JF-Expert Member

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    Lait ningekuwa na busara japo robo ya hizi....................ndio maana nilishafikiria kukutumia maombi lakini...................
     
  11. Michelle

    Michelle JF-Expert Member

    #11
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    Kwe lakini jamani visasi utafanya kwa wangapi? na kwenye kisasi ni mzigo tu unajiongezea hasa unapokuwa unalipiza kisasi kwa asiyestahili....forgivenesss is the best option.....asante Lokissa!!!!
     
  12. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

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    Well done dearest!!!:hug:
    Point tupu!!!
     
  13. Michelle

    Michelle JF-Expert Member

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    Lakini.........l.o.l,cheers St PM!!
     
  14. Michelle

    Michelle JF-Expert Member

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    Thanks dearest......:hug:
     
  15. MAMMAMIA

    MAMMAMIA JF-Expert Member

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    Ni angalizo zuri Dada Michelle. Kukimbilia kwa uhusiano mwengine baada ya kuvunjika uliopita ni sawa na kutaka kutatua tatizo kwa njia ya mkato. Matokeo yake ni kujiongezea maumivu, kuwafanya wengine walipe alilotenda mtu mwengine na hata kujivujia heshima yako. Ufumbuzi wa busara ni kuponesha vidonda. Pengine na wewe kuna sehemu ya makosa yako yaliyochangia kuvunjika kwa uhusiano. Ingawaje inasemwa kuwa "binadamu ndiye mnyama (kiumbe) pekee anayejikwaa jiwe hilo hilo mara tatu", bado unapaswa kutafakari, kuangalia ulipojikwaa na jaribu kutorudia tena kosa, liwe lako moja kwa moja au lilosababishwa kuvunjika kwa uhusiano wako.
     
  16. LD

    LD JF-Expert Member

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    Thanks Michelle, inabidi mtu uende likizo miaka mitano au mitatu kutibu majereha ya kuumizwa manake ukibandika bandua utajikuta unakuwa na unhealed broken heart!!
     
  17. Mpevu

    Mpevu JF-Expert Member

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    Michelle,Hii ni dhambi na roho ya mtu inayolia kwaajili yako ni laana.
    Umenena vema,Ila hapo kwenye bold & coloured itategemea, iwapo ni mapenzi tu kiboifrend na kigerlfrend WOTE WANALAANIKA KWA MADHAMBI YAO. Bali ikiwa ni wanandoa na wametofautiana kwa sababu za msingi zisizohusisha ukware...hapo huenda wakaasalimika. Katika mapenzi sisi wanaadam huwa tunajisahau kama ile huwa ni dhambi, ila huwa tunajiridhisha tu na fikra zetu finyu zisizofikiria maisha baada ya duniani.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  18. CPU

    CPU JF Gold Member

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    Feb 20, 2011
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    Ni ushauri mzuri sana, tena sana
    Ila tatizo ni wagonjwa wenyewe wako tayari kumezahizo dawa??
    Mi nadhani hawa WAGONJWA watapita na kuziangalia tu hizi dawa bila kumeza
     
  19. Michelle

    Michelle JF-Expert Member

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    MAMMAMIA
    Ni kweli tunasahau kuwa wajibu wa kusamehe na kuyaacha yaliyopita ni wako binafsi,unampa mtu mwingine kazi hiyo,which does't work most of the time,we have to deal,solve our own problems and when we are ok,build new relationships watu wanatafuta stopover/layover za matatizo yao,na vile ni ngumu kujua lililoko kwa roho ya mtu,unamkubalia kumbe mpo pamoja physically lakini emotionally una-invest mwenyewe its painful sana thanks!
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  20. Michelle

    Michelle JF-Expert Member

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    Bandika bandua mbaya sana my sister,kwa mwaka unaweza kuwa umefanya hivyo hata mara 20,sasa kuja kupona hilo donda,utahiyaji muda sana,lakini otherwise ukitulia na kutafakari hata mwezi unaweza pona na kuendelea na maisha yako....issue ni we tend to avoid dealing with our emotional problems.....
     
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