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Ukweli Vs Usiri katika MMU....Ni taarifa kiasi gani apewe mwenza?

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Dark City, Sep 7, 2011.

  1. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Sep 7, 2011
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    Nimekutana na matukio ya baadhi ya wajukuu zangu ambayo yameniacha hoi,

    Kwa wale walio kwenye mahusiano ya kimapenzi (bila kujali strength ya bond), ni taarifa kiasi gani anatakiwa kupewe wa ubani wako?? Ni vitu gani vinatakiwa kuwekwa siri?? Labda niweke hivi:

    Past relations....ni kiasi gani kiwe siri na yale unayoamua kumueleza basi ni asilimia ngapi za ukweli apewe??

    Mambo ya fweza.....kuna haja ya kuwa siri? Na kama siyo siri, mwenzio ajue asilimia kiasi ngapi?

    Mambo ya familia yako....umweleze yapi na kuficha yapi...na kwa yale uliyoamua kueleza, kuna umuhimu wa kubakiza kitu??

    Mambo ya kwenye bedroom...Sanaa iwe kiasi gani na ukweli uwe kiasi gani?? Asilimia ngapa ya yale unayomweleza ni fix?

    Mahusiano na vibustani (current but dubious relations, if any)......Unaweza kusema (disclose) kitu hapa??


    AOB.......Unaweza kuongeza lolote ili wajukuu zangu wapate faida bure,

    Kumbuka...umepewa bure....huna sababu ya kuwanyima wenzio!!!

    ......Ila ukikaa uchi lazima utaumbuka na ukijifunika sana utaiva kama ndizi!!!
     
  2. Shantel

    Shantel JF-Expert Member

    #2
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    babu mi nafikiri hakuna siri yeyote unatakiwa kuwa nayo ukiwa na mwenza , mnatakiwa muwe wawazi sana ili isije kosesha uaminifu, coz hakuna siri inayokaa milele, huwa zinabumburuka then hapo inapoteza kabisa uaminifu
     
  3. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #3
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    i will always prefer half truth.......

    kama ukweli unaumiza bora usisemwe,but usiseme uwongo....

    like umewahi kuwa na wapenzi wangapi huko nyuma,kama ukweli ni mgumu
    bora tu ueseme siwezi kujibu hilo swali,au haina umuhimu now

    kuliko useme aahh ni mmoja tu...
     
  4. Remmy

    Remmy JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Sep 7, 2011
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    1 Jibu la kwanza unalakificha kuhusu idadi ya ex zako, kama ni wengi, mhhh lazima ufiche, si vema kuwaeleza wote, na yale yote mlokuwa mkifanya.
    2 Fedha mi naona hakuna sababu ya kufichana, weka wazi mambo yote.
    3 Ni vizuri ukaeleza ukweli kuhusu familia yako, ila yale mabaya ya kuharibu uhusiano, mhhhh, sijui
    4 Kwenye bedroom, hiyo mi najua inahappen automatically, kuna kujifunza as u goo on, but may be u can talk about it.
    nitaongezea as we goo on.
     
  5. Mr Rocky

    Mr Rocky JF-Expert Member

    #5
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    Dc I prefer half truth maana mengine sio ya kuyaeleza. Kama mama yako na baba yako walikuwa wanadundana na kumwaga misosi kila siku ya nini kumueleza.
    Kuna mambo kweli unmatakiwa umweleze wako wa ubani ila sio yote ni better half truth na mengine akayalearn taratibu kadri unavyoishi nae. Usije ukamwaga kuku kwenye mchele wengi ukasababisha hata yule uliye nae akuogope
     
  6. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #6
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    Dada/Ndugu, umesoma hapa??

     
  7. Mamaya

    Mamaya JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Sep 7, 2011
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    1.Kuhusu familia hakuna cha kuficha
    2.kuhusu mambo ya mshiko kwa wachaga haitakiwi kumweleza mpenzi/mkeo una hedheri/pesa kiasi gani hasa mkeo akiwa ni mchaga sijui kwa makabila mengine.
    3.kuhusu past relations haitakiwi ueleze yote mengine ni ya kuficha,mfano ulishawahi kuwa na mademu kumi kabla huwez taja no yote hyo utamjengea mwenzio wasi wasi juu ya tabia yako.
    4.mambo ya kitandani hayo hayana cha kueleza inakuja outmatic kutokana na nyinyi wenyewe.
     
  8. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #8
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    Tuko pamoja kabisa.....kwa upande wangu..wale wote ambao chati zao zilikuwa juu nimemweleza na ku-disclose akama >90%. Ila kwa wale kuku wa kienyeji na wa kwenye vichochoro/mapagala ya uswahilini sikumweleza hata mmoja!!

    Hapa pia tuko pamoja...Mimi nimeweka wazi sources karibia zote ila kuna kama 10% ya vitu huwa nabakiza kwa usalama wangu..Naogopa nisikose hata thumni ya kumnunulia Rose/Mwajuma Grand Malta na kutangaza ujiko....Hata ungekuwa mzee kiasi gani ila ukikutana na kabinti kanajishaua unafeel kwamba labda ukapinge ofa ili kajue kwamba bado maini ni fresh!!

    Binafsi nahisi kwaba ukieleza 50-60% si vibaya..Ila siyo vizuri kumpa silaha ambazo siku moja anaweza kuzitumia kukumaliza...Mpenzi anaweza siku moja akajifanya Osama na kukulipua...Hilo ni muhimu sana kuwa nalo wakati wote!!

    Nadhani usanii mwingi unatakiwa hapa au??
     
  9. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #9
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    Kama kuna siku mambo yamekwenda ndivyo sivyo unamwelezaje mwenzio??
     
  10. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #10
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    wanawake wakubwa kiumri wanajua kuwa sio kila siku ni jumatatu

    but wasichana wadogo,utamueleza ulipopitia lol
     
  11. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #11
    Sep 7, 2011
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    MTAZAMO WANGU....

    Past relationships…

    Mie naamini kusema kuhusu past relationships… only kama huyo ex- bado mwawasiliana for what ever reasons… (i.e mtoto).. AU labda huyo Ex- yupo mazingira ya karibu na hua mwagongana mitaani… AU Kuna sababu yoyote ya msingi ya kueleza nje ya for the sake of knowing… Sababu kubwa ikiwa watu wamepitia mapito mengi katika relationships… Waweza kuta mwingine alibakwa na ndugu/mtu yoyote when very young/hata ukubwani… Alikua hajitambui alikua mama Huruma but akaja akajitambua na kujutia… Na kwa mwanaume hivo hivo – kwamba alikua player mno mpaka alikua haangali mradi kamaliza haja zake… In this situations unapata edited version of the Story… Sasa why bother??

    Mambo Ya Fweza..

    Ni muhimu saana Mpenzi/mwenza kujua kiasi cha pesa wapokea ama kutengeneza… But tokana na kwamba wanadamu tume evolve for the worse na watu wameweka saana pesa mbele… inafanya iwe kazi kweli katika maamuzi ya kusema… Kinachochangia uwe wazi au msiri wa mambo ya Fweza ni the way Mpenzi wako alivo… Je nimuelewa?? Ana economise?? Hana tama?? Akaijua una pesa saana ndo hubweteka?? Ni msumbufu wa mahitaji kila mara?? Mwaribifu – yaaani mfujaji (e.g.. Utunzaji wa vitu vya thamani)?? Nae pia ana kipato?? Haya yoote ni ya msingi katika kuweka/kuto weka bayana kuhusu pesa…

    Mambo ya Familia….

    Kila familia ina mamboa yao ambayo hustahili iwe siri ya family (mara nyingi haya mambo ni ya aibu mno) ingawa huzidiana from family to family… Siri za namna hii hakuna haja ya Mpenzi ama Mchumba wako kujua.. labda on the condition kua akijua basi kutakua na unafuu, ama kufutika kwa hio siri.. otherwise kweli haipendezi… waweza hata sababisha spouse wako ajenge dharau kwa familia yakko – ambayo sio nzuri in the long term…

    Mambo ya Chumbani

    Ya chumbani DC hayo hubaki chumbani…
     
  12. Chauro

    Chauro JF-Expert Member

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    sijui niko sahihi lakin huwa naprefer ukweli na uwazi hasa pale tulipoanzia mimi na yeye ya nyuma huwa siyapi nafasi, mara nyingi hii hutegemea na mwenza uliyenae
     
  13. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #13
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    Na wewe utafungua mdomo useme kweli The Boss???
     
  14. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #14
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    Tupe basi asilimia za ukweli na uwazi au wewe unaweka 100% sokoni??
     
  15. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #15
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    Babu DC binafsi hua naamini kwamba ukiwa kwenye mahusiano na mtu ambae unahisia nae kisawasawa/mna mawasiliano (ukaribu wa kutosha) na unamwamini kama rafiki utamweleza chochote kile ambacho ungependa afahamu hata kama kinatambulisha mapungufu yako.

    Muhimu linapokuja swala la kufikiria umwambie nini na usimwambie nini mwenzi wako ni kwanza uwe angalau na mawazo ya wapi unataka mahusiano yenu yaishie (kama huna malengo ya muda mrefu na mtu sio muhimu sana kumpa nafasi ya kukufahamu kiundani ) ili uweze kujua ni sehemu gani ya maisha yako ni muhimu kushea nae na sehemu gani sio muhimu, pili ujue nae ana mawazo/matakwa gani kuhusiana na mahusiano yenu ili usije ukamwaga mchele wako kulisha kuku wa jirani ambae kwako kaja kucheza tu.
    Ukishajua kama wote mna malengo ya kuwa pamoja mpaka pale wote mtakapoamua vinginevyo basi chagua kwanza kumueleza yale mambo ambayo yanaweza kuingilia /husika na mahusiano yenu hapowakati wowote ule. Vitu kama kuwa na mtoto, kuwa na X ambae ni msumbufu/mkorofi na vingine kama hivyo ni muhimu kumjulisha mwenzako.

    Kujua kiasi cha pesa anachotengeneza sio muhimu sana , muhimu ni kujua anazitengeneza vipi.

    Mambo ya chumbani onyesha ufundi wako wote (kwani unambakishia nani?) , usimsifie kitu ambacho hapo baadae unaweza ukashawishika kumueleza kwamba ulikua unampiga fix pale utakapochoka kuvumilia/pretend kwamba hicho kitu kiko/kinafanyika vile upendavyo wewe.

    Nyongeza usifanye mambo madogo yawe makubwa kwa kuyafanya siri. Kuwa muwazi kwa yale yote unayojua hutoweza kuyakimbia (kuna past unazoweza kusahau na zisikusumbue ila zipo ambazo kama sio leo kesho zitajitokeza) ili kama ni kitu ambacho hatoweza kuvumilia aende na njia zake kabla wote hamjapoteza muda wenu kutengeneza mahusiano ambayo hayana MATUMAINI.
     
  16. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

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    Hapo (blue) umeniangusha.....Siyo kawaida yako kuficha ficha...Mbona hata zile SRM zinazikufanya kichaa umetueleza??

    Weka wazi tu, ni 100% unamwaga kwenye public domain ya mwenyewe?
     
  17. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #17
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    what if hakuna ulipopita
    just a bad day??
     
  18. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #18
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    Hii siyo scenario ya kutisha na kwa hiyo hakuna sababu ya kupata pressure nayo...Kasheshe ni pale ambapo kweli umepita kwa dada Sophy na kukamuliwa mzigo wako woote...Sasa mama anadai na wewe huna cha kutoa...

    Uko tayari kutoa suicidal confession??
     
  19. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #19
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    JF ina mambo.....Hapa sina mbavu kabisa,

    Huyo kuku wa jirani dawa yake ni manati....Kama hataki kutulia unamlipua tu

    Lizzy...hebu basi extend coverage yako kwa wale wa 1947!!
     
  20. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #20
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    Hehehehhehe cheka siku ziongezeke babu!!

    Mhhh hivi kwani wa 1947 wanahitaji upendeleo?
     
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