Dismiss Notice
You are browsing this site as a guest. It takes 2 minutes to CREATE AN ACCOUNT and less than 1 minute to LOGIN

Ugumu huu wa kutoa talaka!

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Mtambuzi, Sep 22, 2011.

  1. Mtambuzi

    Mtambuzi Platinum Member

    #1
    Sep 22, 2011
    Joined: Oct 29, 2008
    Messages: 8,572
    Likes Received: 692
    Trophy Points: 280
    Kuna wanaume wengi sana ambao ni wagumu kutoa talaka, hata pale ambapo kile kinachoitwa ndoa, sio ndoa bali ni aina ya vurugu iliyokomaa kiasi kwamba mtu kutoka roho ndio hatua pekee iliyobaki. Wanaume hao wanakataa kutoa talaka kwa sababu ambazo haziko wazi.

    Ukweli ni kwamba wanaume wanaokataa kutoa talaka hata pale ambapo wanajua kabisa kwamba, hakuna upendo kati yao na wake zao hufanya hivyo kwa sababu mbalimbali. Kwanza ni kuhofia kwamba, talaka itawagharimu kimali, kwa sababu watatakiwa kugawana mali na hao wake zao.

    Pili ni kutaka kuwakomoa wake zao kwa sababu, huenda wao (wanaume) ndio wameshika kwenye mpini katika vurugu hizo. Lakini pia inawezekana ni mfujaji, na kama inavyofahamika kwamba mwanaume mfujaji hana mdhamana. Mwanaume anayefuja, hupenda kuona mwanmke akiteseka kwa vitendo na kauli zake, na mwanamke kutaka kujitoa kwenye kifungo chake ni fadhaa kubwa kwa mfujaji, hawezi kukubali.

    Tatu ni kutokujiamini kwa wanaume, ambao huwa wanachukulia kutoa talaka kama jambo lenye kuwadhalilisha sana. lakini pia ni ile dhana kuwa kuwaacha wake hao na kwenda kwenye mikono ya wanaume wengine, itakuwa ni kujishusha sana. Wanaume wa aina hii wanakuwa na wivu wa mbwa kwa majani ya ng'ombe.

    Lakini ipo hatari kubwa kwa jambo hili, kwani tumeshuhudia au kusikia kupitia vyombo vya habari juu ya wanawake ambao wamewahi kujiuwa au kuuwa waume zao, kwa sababu ya vurugu za waume zao, kukataa katakata kutoa talaka. Kama hakutaki si umwache…………….!!!!!!!
     
  2. ndetichia

    ndetichia JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Sep 22, 2011
    Joined: Mar 18, 2011
    Messages: 27,534
    Likes Received: 120
    Trophy Points: 160
    duu hii kali kaujumbe kamesimama kudos mkuu..
     
  3. Jestina

    Jestina JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Sep 22, 2011
    Joined: Jan 6, 2011
    Messages: 4,768
    Likes Received: 49
    Trophy Points: 145
    nyingine wanafikiria watoto,nani atawalea....
     
  4. MwanajamiiOne

    MwanajamiiOne Platinum Member

    #4
    Sep 22, 2011
    Joined: Jul 24, 2008
    Messages: 10,479
    Likes Received: 57
    Trophy Points: 145
    Mtambuzi
    NAomba nisicomment kwenye hii mada yako leo. Ninawezajikuta nakula ban toka kwa kila mod!!
    Ni mada nzuri sana aksante.
     
  5. Nailyne

    Nailyne JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Sep 22, 2011
    Joined: Dec 11, 2010
    Messages: 350
    Likes Received: 1
    Trophy Points: 0
    mi nadhani wengi wanaamini kitendo cha kutoa talaka kinahalalisha freedom ya mwanamke kuwa na mahusiano na mwanamme mwingine, kitu ambacho wasingependa kitokee.
     
  6. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #6
    Sep 22, 2011
    Joined: Apr 16, 2011
    Messages: 16,200
    Likes Received: 156
    Trophy Points: 160
    THANK YOU.... Nimepita hapa kwa Mtambuzi.... vere vere Useful....
     
  7. Rutashubanyuma

    Rutashubanyuma JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Sep 22, 2011
    Joined: Sep 24, 2010
    Messages: 61,428
    Likes Received: 492
    Trophy Points: 180
    kujiua siyo hoja............................huyo wakujitoa roho hata ukimpa talaka bado atajitoa roho.............................kigezo pekee cha talaka ni uzinzi tu................................mengineyo yanayosababisha talaka ni utovu wa nidhamu kwa Muumba ambaye ndiye aliyeshuhudia ndoo tajwa............wakati ikikomelewa na viro la milele
     
  8. Rutashubanyuma

    Rutashubanyuma JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Sep 22, 2011
    Joined: Sep 24, 2010
    Messages: 61,428
    Likes Received: 492
    Trophy Points: 180
    hukubaliai na hoja za mtambuzi au unamwunga mkono........................kauli yako hapa inatosha.............
     
  9. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Sep 22, 2011
    Joined: Aug 18, 2009
    Messages: 36,064
    Likes Received: 14,312
    Trophy Points: 280
    Yaani,sijui nianzie wapi..
    But somehow umeniambia kitu muhimu...
     
  10. M

    MORIA JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Sep 22, 2011
    Joined: Jul 1, 2011
    Messages: 521
    Likes Received: 2
    Trophy Points: 35
    Mtambuzi naomba kutofautiana nawe kidogo... ndugu yangu talaka hata MUNGU haitaki isipokuwa kwa habari ya uzinzi...kwanini kushangilia talaka na isiwe kutafuta suluhu lau itachukua muda mrefu...kuachana kuna gharama kubwa especially watoto na kuendeleza zinaa(ukimwi je?)...ktk ujane(kujitakia?) kuna sononi hatimaye kifo...ndoa nyingi zimepata afya baada ya suluhu ya muda(kutenganishwa kwa muda)...ni mchango tu.
     
  11. Mzee

    Mzee JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Sep 23, 2011
    Joined: Feb 2, 2011
    Messages: 11,593
    Likes Received: 1,322
    Trophy Points: 280
    Mwingine ametafutia mke na wazazi.
     
  12. Mtambuzi

    Mtambuzi Platinum Member

    #12
    Sep 23, 2011
    Joined: Oct 29, 2008
    Messages: 8,572
    Likes Received: 692
    Trophy Points: 280
    Mimi sio mhafidhina, huwa nakubali kutofautiana................nimeipokea changamoto yako
     
  13. Gaijin

    Gaijin JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Sep 23, 2011
    Joined: Aug 21, 2007
    Messages: 11,849
    Likes Received: 17
    Trophy Points: 0
    Kuna wengine hawataki kutoa talaka kwa sababu ya mapenzi. Bado wao wanapenda japo kuwa wao hawapendwi. Wako radhi kukaa na wanwake wasiowapenda kwa vile wao wanawapenda.
     
  14. M

    MORIA JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Sep 23, 2011
    Joined: Jul 1, 2011
    Messages: 521
    Likes Received: 2
    Trophy Points: 35
    Nakushukuru mtambuzi...endelea kutupa shule..
     
  15. M

    MORIA JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Sep 23, 2011
    Joined: Jul 1, 2011
    Messages: 521
    Likes Received: 2
    Trophy Points: 35
    Umegundua eeeh!...tulipendana sana mwanzo...nikakuanzishia(ulikopa thru' kibanda chetu) biashara waenda hongkong umependeza,umenawiri...afu waja na hadithi za talaka...akafaidi nani au ndo majaribu?
     
  16. Tausi.

    Tausi. Senior Member

    #16
    Sep 23, 2011
    Joined: Aug 29, 2011
    Messages: 125
    Likes Received: 0
    Trophy Points: 0
    Haswaaaaaa nakubaliana na wewe Moria, pia nakubaliana na kaka Mtambuzi, panapo bidi hubidika, mtu anakunyanyasa mapenzi hamna tena suluhisho kila kukicha bado na talaka mwanaume hataki kutoa haileti maana, Bora mkapeane natala na kila mtu kimpango wake.
    Ila wanaume wengi inakuwa ngumu kufanya hivyo, sijui ndio wivu wa kuona mwanamke aliyekuwa anammiliki yeye sasa anachukuliwa na mwanaume mwingine.
     
  17. Sabry001

    Sabry001 JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Sep 23, 2011
    Joined: Jun 28, 2011
    Messages: 1,064
    Likes Received: 7
    Trophy Points: 135
    Wanaume wengi wenye kasumba km hzo utakuta ni watu wenye wivu sana kiasi cha kuua. Huwanyanyasa wake zao,huwanyima hata haki ya kufanya kazi, huwatenga na ndugu wa pande zote, huwanyima acces ktk resource zozote, hupenda kumuona mwanamke hana ki2, wanapenda kuombwa pesa ya kila ki2, mke haruhusiwi kuwa na hata marafiki na kwa kweli km mwanamke sio strong anaweza kujiua. Nilishuhudia ktk ndoa ya rafiki yangu mambo km hayo, mwanaume hakuwa tayari kumpa mkewe talaka japo alikuwa ameoa mwanamke mwingne na alimtenda kila ubaya huyo dada. Kesi iliendelea kwa miaka 5 na reasons ni mali, ila baadae talaka ilipatikana baada ya yule dada kusema hataki fidia wala kupewa mali, anataka tu ndoa ivunjwe. Baada ya kutoa talaka yule mwanaume aliendelea kumsumbua na kumtishia yule mwanamke kiasi kwamba yule dada alitamani amuue huyu mtalaka wake kwani alizidi(Km mliona post yangu ya I'L KILL HIM 4 MY KIDS!) Watu km hawa Mungu ndie anaweza kukomesha ufedhuli wao kwani majuzi yule kaka alipata ajali akafariki. Kwa upande wangu ingawa sio vyema kufurahia kifo cha mtu, ila nilifurahia kufa kwa huyo kaka kwa kweli.
     
  18. K

    KipimaPembe JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Sep 23, 2011
    Joined: Aug 5, 2007
    Messages: 1,282
    Likes Received: 48
    Trophy Points: 145
    Mtambuzi,

    Hii imekaa kiupande upande, yaani wewe unaamini kuwa vurugu katika ndoa husababishwa na wanaume, na kuwa wanaume ndo wanatakiwa watoe taraka kwa wake zao. Huo ni msimamo ambao umeshapitwa na wakati na hali halisi haiko hivyo. Hakuna utafiti unaothibitisha kuwa panapokuwa na vurugu kwenye ndoa basi wanaume ndo wako responsible!!

    Mwanamke akiona anafanyiwa vurugu naye hapendi hizo vurugu na wala hashiriki kwenye hizo vurugu, huwa ana uhuru wa kuondoka na kwenda kutafuta taraka yake mahakamani. Ukiona vurugu zinaendelea na wote wapo, ujue wote ni wabia katika vurugu hizo na wote kila mmoja ana makosa ya kwake!!

    Ni rahisi sana kufanya mjumuisho eti wanaume wanaleta vurugu kwenye ndoa bila kufanya utafiti wa kujua kinachosababisha hizo vurugu. Wewe kwa kuwa kwa maoni yako tu unaona kuwa wanawake ni victim wa vurugu (Mambo yakienda physical mara nyingi mwanamke atalia kunyanyaswa) basi umejumuisha kuwa wanaume ndo wenye makosa. Jiulize mara mbili, pengine huna ndoa, ndoa unaiona tu kutokea nje!!

    Fanya utafiti ndugu, iko siku unaweza kuyameza maneno yako uliyoandika hapa. Ulichokiandika, hukijui!! Pengine umeangalia case moja au mbili zinazokuzunguka; hujaangalia upana wote wa suala hili! Si rahisi kama unavyofikiria.
     
  19. Mtambuzi

    Mtambuzi Platinum Member

    #19
    Sep 23, 2011
    Joined: Oct 29, 2008
    Messages: 8,572
    Likes Received: 692
    Trophy Points: 280
    Naomba nikubali kutokubaliana........... umesoma mtazamo wangu vibaya, kuna tofauti kubwa kati ya kusema "Wanaume wote" na "Wanaume wengi" mimi nimesema Wanaume Wengi................. Sijajumuisha hapo, au labda kama sielewi Kiswahili.
    Anya way........... mimi sio Malaika wala Nabii kwamba kila ninachosema niko sahihi, ndio maana hapa JF watu huwa wanatofautiana kimtazamo lakini hawagombani.............au nakosea ndugu yangu?
    Ni kweli, labda sijafanya utafiti utakaomridhisha kila mtu, lakini jambo ambalo wengi hatulijui ni kwamba taratibu za madai ya talaka hapa Nchini zimeshikiliwa ki mfumo DUME, ni wanawake wachache sana wanaofahamu utaratibu sahihi wa kutoa talaka, sio huko vijijini tu bali hata mijini. na ndio maana neno, "naomba talaka yangu" hutamkwa sana na wanawake na sio wanaume. je unajua sababu?
    Endelea kusoma mfululizo wa mada zangu nitakazokuwa naziweka humu.........

    Angalizo: unaruhusiwa kukosoa au hata kuhoji chochote nitakachoweka humu.
     
Loading...