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Tupo Sahihi ama kuna Tatizo!

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by tikiti maji, Aug 20, 2010.

  1. tikiti maji

    tikiti maji New Member

    #1
    Aug 20, 2010
    Joined: Aug 14, 2010
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    Habari wana JF?!!
    Ndoa yangu ni changa sana, ina miaka minne tu but we spent almoast six years in relations before marriage.
    Nimesomesha huyu mke kuanzia diploma hadi degree na mwenzangu kawa na bahati kwani amekuwa employed sehemu ambayo wanamlipa na kumu entertain vizuri sana kucompare na mie niliesomea degree nikiwa kazini, inanilazimu nilipe fadhila kwa kampuni.
    N`way, the problem is; mke wangu kaanza tabia za umimi sana, mfano kafungua duka kwa juhudi zake binafsi ingawa lilikuwa ni wazo langu. Amini usiamini shemeji zangu wamekuwa na nguvu dukani kuliko mie mumewe. Pia akifanya chochote cha maendeleo anashirikisha zaidi nduguze kuliko mie, inakuwa kana kwamba mie si mumewe, hata vitu vya ndani alivyonunua yeye nduguze wanavijua vyote.
    Sasa najiuliza kitu kimoja, kwanini vyangu viwe vyake na vyake viwe vyao?? na tabia hii nimeiona baada ya yeye kupata kazi.
    Wana JF ni ndoa zote ziko hivi au ni yangu tuu? Ushauri Jamani
     
  2. chloe.obrain

    chloe.obrain JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Aug 20, 2010
    Joined: Feb 25, 2010
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    watu wa tabia hizo za ubinafsi wapo kibao humu duniani, hivi huyo mkeo ni kabila gani???
    jaribu kukaa naye fresh kwa upendo umuulize kwa upole kabisa kwamba kwa nini anafanya hivyo, kama ni tabia ya kushawishiwa na hao kaka zake au ndugu zake ataacha lakini kama ni tabia ya kuzaliwa nayo inabidi ufanye maombi kwa bidii zaidi ndugu yangu.
    ila wanawake wengine bwana, yaani wanajua kuficha makucha sasa amesubiri hadi kamaliza kusoma na kupata kazi ndo kayaachia lol!!! damn her! pole sana tikiti maji.:confused3:
     
  3. D

    Dick JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Aug 20, 2010
    Joined: Feb 10, 2010
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    Pole kaka. Ndoa haziko hivyo, huo ni ufa mbaya sana. Nachelea kusema kuwa ndoa yako iko rehani (50-50), usishangae kuambiwa sasa basi. Cha msingi kufanaya, ni wewe kukaa kikao naye zaidi sana jiandae kisaikilojia.
     
  4. Edson

    Edson JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Aug 20, 2010
    Joined: Mar 7, 2009
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    pole sana kaka yangu: chukua hatua, kaa na muongeee na huyu mkeo

    kama hakushirikishna anashirika nduguze basi wanaweza kukumaliza ili wao watawale kila kitu maana atakuon a wewe ni kikwazo.

    kaka yangu aliwahi kuwa na kisa kama chako Mungu si invisible siku moja akachukua hatua, alimkuta mke wake ana akaunt mbili ambazo kaka alikwa hajui. pia alikuta hirizi kubwa kwenye pochi ya wife wake yenye majina mawili, jina la kaka(mumewe) na jina mama yetu mzaz. ile hirizi ilikuwa ndani ya chupa ndogo hivi: ile kaka kuishika ile chupa, image ya kaka na mama yetu zilianza kutokeza kutoka ndani ya chupa. kaka alizimia papo.

    chukua hatua mkuu watakufyeka hao.
     
  5. Makanyaga

    Makanyaga JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Aug 20, 2010
    Joined: Sep 28, 2007
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    Tikiti maziwa! Pole sana ndugu yangu
    Utapata shida sana kama utakuwa na tabia ya kujali maslahi zaidi kwenye ndoa, utakufa kwa presha. Zila acha kujali kila kilicho mali yake, ubakize penzi tu kwake, halafu usimpe "restriction" kwa vile ambavyo ni mali yako. Chukua hiyo kama long plan, unless awe hakupendi tena, ila kama anakupenda, lazima huko mbele atakuja kujirekebisha. Mtu kamwe usinyanyaswe kwa ajili ya mali, leo upo kesho haupo, unaacha kila kitu hata kalamu tu huwezi kuichukua!
     
  6. Tonge

    Tonge JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Aug 20, 2010
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    Pagumu hapo ila inabidi uende nao taratibu, wapo wanawake wenye tabia kama hio, so busara inahitajika sana, tulia uwe busy na ishu zako zaidi na uhakikishe tu home pako poa ili kuepusha migongano, mali si kitu ila utu, najua yatakuja kuwashinda tu usijali.
     
  7. Baba_Enock

    Baba_Enock JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Aug 20, 2010
    Joined: Aug 21, 2008
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    Karibu Jamvini:

    Na wewe anza kuishi kivyako-vyako usimshirikishe katika shughuli zako - Inavyoonyesha hiyo ndoa it is "No Longer At Ease"!
     
  8. Mnene 1

    Mnene 1 Senior Member

    #8
    Aug 20, 2010
    Joined: Jan 14, 2010
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    Pole sana kaka, hamna kitu kinachouma kwenye ndoa kama mmoja kujiona bora zaidi ya mwenzke kwa ajili ya kipato anachokipata.
    Kwa hali halisi, sio rahisi kuichukulia poa hiyo hali, ni swala la kukaa wawili na kuwekana wazi.
     
  9. Katavi

    Katavi Platinum Member

    #9
    Aug 20, 2010
    Joined: Aug 31, 2009
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    Hapo kaka nawe anza kufanya mambo kivyakovyako!
     
  10. NG'OTIMBEBEDZU

    NG'OTIMBEBEDZU JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Aug 20, 2010
    Joined: Aug 11, 2010
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    Mimi nakushauri nenda kwa wazazi wake (kama wapo) uwaambie matatizo hayo,hapo ndipo utajua ukubwa wa tatizo.Inawezekana tatizo ni hao shemeji zako na ndugu zake wengine wamemkamata kisawasawa anashindwa kuchomoka. Hapo ndipo utaweza kuchukua hatua
     
  11. MwanajamiiOne

    MwanajamiiOne Platinum Member

    #11
    Aug 20, 2010
    Joined: Jul 24, 2008
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    Shemeji Tikiti kama ni kweli mada hii nakupa pole ila usikate tamaa haya uliyoyaeleza hapa kuwa yanakuumiza kaa na dada umweleze kinagaubaga na ukiona haelewi wahusishe wasimamizi wenu wa ndoa kama bado anakaidi jua si dalili njema kwa ndoa yako. Pole sana shemeji
     
  12. 2my

    2my JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Aug 20, 2010
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    kwanza pole kwa mkasa!for sure wanawake nt all wanasahau fadhila pindi wafanikiwapo i don knw why!!!!!!!
    ww mweke chini mzungumze coz kadri siku zinavyozid kuyoyoma na madhara yatazid kuwa makubwa!!!!!!!!
     
  13. Masanilo

    Masanilo JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Aug 20, 2010
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    I am missing you! Uko kwenye Mfungo?
     
  14. The Finest

    The Finest JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Aug 20, 2010
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    Duh mbona pagumu hapa jaribu kukaa na kuongea nae kwanza, tatizo ni kwamba ameishaona ona ana uwezo wa kufanya vitu bila kukushirikisha wewe ambayo imeishaanza kuleta matatizo ajue kuna leo na kesho na kwamba anavyofanya sasa hivi bila kukushirikisha siku maji yakimkuta shingoni mambo yameenda vibaya atajuta mwenyewe saa zingine ukimsomesha mwanamke for the sake ya maisha yenu akiona ameanza kupata vijisenti ndio nyodo zinaanza hapo DAMN IT.
     
  15. BelindaJacob

    BelindaJacob JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Aug 20, 2010
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    Mawasiliano ni kitu kizuri, umeshaongea nae na kumweleza jinsi tabia hiyo inavyokukera? tatizo lingine ni kujishukia, mwenzio usikute anakaza kimaisha lakini wewe ukaona amebadilika na yeye hajijui anaona anajishughulisha!!
    Usikate tamaa, weka wazi yote yanayokukwaza na upate kujua upande wake!!!..
     
  16. Lutala

    Lutala JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Aug 20, 2010
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    Duuuuu hiyo noma. Usije shangaa ukaambiwa huna mchango katika familia kwa hiyo unaweza kutambaa
     
  17. LeopoldByongje

    LeopoldByongje JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Aug 20, 2010
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    Kuongea naye hakutasaidia. Wewe achana na miradi yake. Kwanza yeye kuwa bussy ni jambo zuri katika kudumisha ndoa yenu. Wewe nenda naye taratibu ili mradi ufuatilie kwa karibu nini kinaendelea yaani "Eyes on, hands off". Kumbuka katika hali hiyo mkeo ni materialist. Analojua ni fedha. Iwapo ndoa yenu imejaliwa watoto; ni muhimu utangulize masilahi ya watoto na kwa vyovyote vile mwisho wa siku wanao watafaidi matunda ya miradi hiyo; wasiwasi wangu ni hao ndugu zake.Naona siku si nyingi watadhulumiana na Mkeo atarudi. Kwako wewe endelea na mipango yako kama vile hakuna tatizo lolote. Chukua nafasi yako katika nyumba kama Mume na Baba wa mji. Shemeji zako najua wataleta pingamizi lakini utumie akili na si nguvu. Mshirikishe mkeo katika mipango yako pale inapobidi. Mungu yuko nawe.
     
  18. Konakali

    Konakali JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Aug 20, 2010
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    Pole sana kaka, hiyo ni ishara ya kwamba mwisho sio kuzuri....! I am not letting you to get disappointed, but I am not taught to lie..! This is a bad sign...! Japo huenda bado una nafasi ya kurekebisha hali kwa kumkunja samaki angali mbichi...! Otherwise, uchukulie ulitoa sadaka, au ulizipoteza fedha hizo, and make a sucrifice by letting her go, unless the following situations exists;

    1. That you have a baby or babies already, or expecting to have soon...!

    2. Your age is no longer allowing you to start your life afresh, so you have to take as it...!

    Lakini kama umeamua kumvunja samaki angali mbichi, then you may come back to this forum on how to go about it...! Pia umweke Mungu mbele ya ndoa yako...! Huenda mmemsahau...!
     
  19. Askofu

    Askofu JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Aug 20, 2010
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    10yrs ni muda mfupi???:confused2::confused2:

     
  20. Askofu

    Askofu JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Aug 20, 2010
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    Hivi wanawake mnawasomesha wa nini?? Hilo lilikuwa jukumu la wazazi wake... akukuzidi ndio kama hivo... asilimia kubwa ya wanaume wanaosomesha na kuwaendeleza wake zao wanaishia hapa....

    Endelea kusali sana, Mungu atakusaidia
     
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