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Top 20 funny quotes

Discussion in 'Jokes/Utani + Udaku/Gossips' started by Nalonga, Mar 23, 2011.

  1. N

    Nalonga Senior Member

    #1
    Mar 23, 2011
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    [1] Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them while driving.
    [2] Having one child makes you a parent; having two you are a referee.
    [3] Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!
    [4] I believe we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried – but they wanted cash.
    [5] Don’t feel bad. A lot of people have no talent.
    [6] Don’t marry the person you want to live with, marry the one you cannot live without, but whatever you do, you’ll regret it later.
    [7] You can’t buy love, but you pay heavily for it.
    [8] Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.
    [9] Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.
    [10] Marriage is give and take. You’d better give it to her or she’ll take it anyway.
    [11] My wife and I always compromise. I admit I’m wrong and she agrees with me.
    [12] Those who can’t laugh at themselves leave the job to others.
    [13] Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.
    [14] A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
    [15] You’re getting old when you enjoy remembering things more than doing them.
    [16] It doesn’t matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.
    [17] Saving is the best thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.
    [18] It’s funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged. It’s like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.
    [19] There is only one perfect child in the world and every mother has it.
    [20] There is only one perfect wife in the world and every neighbor has it!
     
  2. Good Guy

    Good Guy JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Mar 24, 2011
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    never argue with a fool,pe0ple might not see the difference
     
  3. Good Guy

    Good Guy JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Mar 24, 2011
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    Light travels faster than sound that's why some people appear bright untill they open their mouth and speak
     
  4. Good Guy

    Good Guy JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Mar 24, 2011
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    the only wedding which may last for ever is the one btn a blind woman and a deaf man.
     
  5. Good Guy

    Good Guy JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Mar 24, 2011
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    When a man steals your wife the best revenge is to let him keep her.
     
  6. Good Guy

    Good Guy JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Mar 24, 2011
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    men who have pierced ears are well prepared for marriage. They have experience in pain and buying jewels.
     
  7. Good Guy

    Good Guy JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Mar 24, 2011
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    The road to success is always under construction.
     
  8. Good Guy

    Good Guy JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Mar 24, 2011
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    Be silent and let people think you are an idiot lather than opening your mouth and clear all daughts!
     
  9. yatima

    yatima JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Mar 24, 2011
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    Working hard is the gateway to success
     
  10. Ndibalema

    Ndibalema JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Mar 24, 2011
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    "Supu ukiitia nazi mchuzi"
     
  11. Cestus

    Cestus JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Mar 24, 2011
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    18 na 9!!! Du!!
     
  12. N

    Nalonga Senior Member

    #12
    Mar 24, 2011
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    Duh! kiongozi hii kali! Supu + Nazi=Mchuzi......ahahahahh,kwani kiongozi supu nini???? ni yale mapande ya finyango au yale majimaji???...teheteheteh!!!!!!
     
  13. NATA

    NATA JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Mar 24, 2011
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    · Death can't be that bad, ever heard a corpse complain?
     
  14. N

    Nalonga Senior Member

    #14
    Mar 24, 2011
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    A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he's finished
     
  15. N

    Nalonga Senior Member

    #15
    Mar 24, 2011
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    Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no lies.
     
  16. Good Guy

    Good Guy JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Mar 24, 2011
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    If you want to get something in life you must work hard for it,now ssshhhh they are abt to announce lottery numbers.
     
  17. Good Guy

    Good Guy JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Mar 24, 2011
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    bad guys please dont kill me i have a wife and kids kill them
     
  18. Good Guy

    Good Guy JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Mar 24, 2011
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    marriage is much like a coffin and each kid is a nail.
     
  19. N

    Nalonga Senior Member

    #19
    Mar 24, 2011
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    I never drink water, fish **** in it.I always drink alcohol.
     
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