Something to laugh about this week!!!!

[Nyaralego]

I have kleptomania,
but when it gets bad,
I take something for it.

FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS!
Except that one where you're naked on the train.

Heaven is Where:
The Police are British,
The Chefs are Italian,
The Mechanics are German,
The Lovers are French
and
It's all organized by the Swiss.

Hell is Where:
The Police are German,
The Chefs are British,
The Mechanics are French,
The Lovers are Swiss
and
It's all organized by the Italians.

Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!

Welcome to Utah
Now set your watch back 20 years.

In just two days from now,
tomorrow will be yesterday.

The statement below is true.
The statement above is false.

I may be schizophrenic,
but at least I have each other.

I am a Nobody.
Nobody is Perfect.
Therefore I am Perfect.

Dyslexics Have More Nuf.

I LOVE COOKING WITH WINE
Sometimes I even put it in the food.

When you work here,
you can name your own salary.
I named mine, "Fred".

Red meat is not bad for you
Fuzzy green meat is bad for you.

I am having an out-of-money experience.

Corduroy pillows are making headlines!