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Simpendi Dada Yangu!

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Katavi, Jul 28, 2011.

  1. Katavi

    Katavi Platinum Member

    #1
    Jul 28, 2011
    Joined: Aug 31, 2009
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    Heshima wakuu, nikiwa mtoto wa mwisho na mvulana pekee katika familia hii nimekuwa sina mahusiano mazuri na huyu dada yangu wa kwanza. Yeye hana matatizo nami, ila mimi nikiwa nae nakosa amani kabisa na ile hali ya kujiamini inapotea kabisa. Kifupi ni kuwa nitakuwa na amani na kujiamini zaidi nikiwa naongea na mzazi kuliko mbele ya huyu dada, na hii ndio inasababisha nimchukie na kumkwepa mara nyingi..... Hivi hii ni kawaida?? Naombeni ushauri katika hili..
     
  2. Rejao

    Rejao JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Jul 28, 2011
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    Huyo dada yako labda ni kicheche!!
     
  3. Criss

    Criss JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Jul 28, 2011
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    Onana na wataalamu mkuu .....unasema hua unakutwa na mfadhaiko siyo?hahahahaaaaaa......
     
  4. F2S

    F2S JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Jul 28, 2011
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    Dont worry huwa inatokea nae unawezakuta anakuchukia kuliko kiasi tehetehe
     
  5. arabianfalcon

    arabianfalcon JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Jul 28, 2011
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    mbona sijakuelewa?
     
  6. ndetichia

    ndetichia JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Jul 28, 2011
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    kwanini ulimfanyia nini mbona unakuwa hujiamini..
     
  7. Eiyer

    Eiyer JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Jul 28, 2011
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    Tatizo ni lako mwenyewe sio la dada yako,anza kujiamini na kumchukulia kama watu wengine!Lakini nafikiri kama kuna kitu kingine behind!!
     
  8. Mkirua

    Mkirua JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Jul 28, 2011
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    Najitahidi kukusoma lakini bado!
     
  9. A

    Ave Ave Maria JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Jul 28, 2011
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    Ukiendekeza hiyo tabia utachukia wengi! Jenga mahusiano mazuri ya ukaribu na dada yako. Jitahidi umzoee zaidi ya hapo hata kama kuna mabaya alokufanyia jitahidi uyasahau. Ukimkubali jinsi alivo basi utaendana nae! Kuboana na kuchukiana ni kawaida lakini inafikia kipindi mtu unagundua wazi kuwa haina faida, so unarudisha mahusiano na nduguyo!
     
  10. J

    JACADUOGO2. JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Jul 28, 2011
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    Labda dada yako ni mchawi!
     
  11. Riwa

    Riwa JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Jul 28, 2011
    Joined: Oct 11, 2007
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    Kwa jinsi ulivyoelezea...ni wazi kuwa wewe ndio tatizo, na si dada yako! Ningejua jinsia yako ingekuwa rahisi kuguess ni ipi kati ya matatizo mawili matatu, lakini kwa vyovyote vile utatuzi wa tatizo hilo si kumu'avoid' dada yako.

    Ralph Marston alisema 'WORRY is your own creation...and FEAR is nothing more than a response you have chosen'....kila kitu kimejengeka kichwani mwako, uwoga ulio nao unapokuwa na dada yako umeu'create' mwenyewe kichwani mwako, na ukachagua kumu'avoid' kwa sababu hiyo..face your fear, make her your friend, spend lot of time with her (unless there is another reason not to)..and one day you will laugh at yourself about the way you fear your sister now!
     
  12. s

    sekitova Member

    #12
    Jul 28, 2011
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    jaman comment zingine tuwe tunaangalia,unaweza kuta unabomoa badala ya kujenga,hawa watu ni ndugu na ameshakwambia dada yake hana matatizo ila yeye ndie mwenye tatizo nae.mimi nazan ni vizur ukaonana na washaur maana inaweza kuwa ni phychological problem na ishajengeka ndan yako...muombe sana Mungu pia akusaidie katika hili,maana huyo dada yako anaweza pia simama kama mzazi wako,ni razima kuwa makin pia upendo na heshima ni muhimu!!
     
  13. God bell

    God bell JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Jul 28, 2011
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    Dunia ya leo watu wanatumia ushirikina kuwafanya watu wawachukie ndugu zao. Shetani anaweza kukutumia umchukie mkeo, mmeo, baba, mama, ndugu zako wote wa damu moja. Kaa uangalie sababu zinazokufanya umchukie dadako kama hakuna basi shetani amekamata nafasi, piga magoti umombe Mola akuepushe na hiyo roho ya chuki.
     
  14. MkimbizwaMbio

    MkimbizwaMbio JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Jul 28, 2011
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    Hivi wewe ni lazima uropoke kwenye kila uzi?
     
  15. A

    Aine JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Jul 28, 2011
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    Oh pole sana Katavi, ila nadhani kwa mtazamo wangu kwa sababu dada yako ni mtoto wa kike wa kwanza na wewe ni mtoto wa kiume wa pekee tena wa mwisho, sasa inawezekana wewe unaona kama yeye anapewa kipaumbele katika mambo fulani amabayo kwa mtazamo wako ulipaswa kupewa wewe.

    Nakushauri weka upendo zaidi kwa dada yako tena umuheshimu sana kwa kuwa ni dada yako tena wa kwanza! aidha muombe Mungu kwani hiyo si roho nzuri na anaweza kukufanya ukawachukia hata ndg zako wengine. Lakini pia muone mtaalamu wa mambo ya saikolojia huenda atakushauri vizuri zaidi kitaalam
     
  16. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #16
    Jul 28, 2011
    Joined: Apr 16, 2011
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    Katavi sijui mko wangapi katika familia... lakini ni dhahiri kitendo chakua ni last born tena Mvulana ni kitu ambacho wazazi wako walifurahia mno ulipopatikana/zaliwa maana ukute walisha kata tamaa ya kua na mtoto wa kiume... Sijajua umepishana umri gani na dadako (hio ingetoa picha kamili ya hali halisi ) Ila kitu ambacho nimekisoma mimi ni kua kuna uwezekano mkubwa saaana kua wazazi wanakupenda wewe most (ni last born na the only boy) to the extent kua wanakudekeza kupita maelezo. Hilo suala husababisha dada yako kua mlezi mzuri kwako kuliko hata wazazi, Yawezekana yeye ndie uhakikisha uko katika mstari, kukujenga na kukuelekeza mienendo ya maisha, kukukemea ukikosea n.k - Kwa ufupi Yaani yeye ndie kachukua nafasi ya malezi bora - yoote yale ambayo mzazi anafanyia wanawe (na ndio maaana watoto wengi huchukia wazazi maana huona kama wanaonewa ama kukabwa - mpaka awe mkubwa na akili timamu ndio anajua kua ah! kumbe wazazi had best interest in me) Hivo hiyo chuki ambayo ingelenga wazazi ipo kwa dada ambae anafanya mambo dhidi yako out of LOVE.

    What to do Ni vizuri saaana kua umetambua kua wamchukia.... pamoja na kusema haipendezi. Hivo hio ni first stage, stage inayo fuata hapo ni wewe kujiuliza (free of emotions - yaani logicaly) ni vitu gani hasa akifanya dadako ndio huongeza chuki! Ukipata jibu hapo utajua kua je una haki ama una haki... na ni muhimu kua uliangalie hili suala vizuri saaana. Na toka maelezo yako ni dhahiri dada akutesi wala kukunyanyasa - maana lazima katika maelezo ungegusia kua anafanya hivo. Hivo Katavi, tumia busara urudi katika mstari na utafakari upya chuki yako.

    N:B Nimekutana sana nawe jamvin, you are one of the most peaciful JF member ninae mfahamu.... nimeshangaa saana kukuta una hii issue hivo kunifanya nijue kua kweli hili suala liko critical kwako. BEST OF LUCK.... katika Ku resolve.

    Pamoja Saaaana.

    ADI
     
  17. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Jul 28, 2011
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    inawezekana kuna ishu za kishirikina ndani yake
     
  18. tbl

    tbl Senior Member

    #18
    Jul 28, 2011
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  19. Katavi

    Katavi Platinum Member

    #19
    Jul 28, 2011
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    <br />
    <br />Si kicheche ni mama wa watoto wawili na sijawahi sikia kesi yoyote na mumewe, nipe ushauri kwa tatizo langu!
     
  20. Katavi

    Katavi Platinum Member

    #20
    Jul 28, 2011
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    mimi si kichaa wa kupatwa na mfadhaiko mbele ya dada yangu....,wataalamu gani wa kuwaona?
     
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