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Secret to a happy marriage is...

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by NgomaNzito, Oct 26, 2009.

  1. NgomaNzito

    NgomaNzito JF-Expert Member

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    Oct 26, 2009
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    Kuna article hii kutoka dailymail la Uk kuwa ukioa Mwanamke uliyepishana naye miaka zaidi ya 5 na kuendelea ndoa yenu itadumu. Je ni kweli kwa jamii yetu ???
    Tuijadili

    Why it pays to have a younger, smarter wife



    By Fiona Macrae
    Last updated at 11:02 PM on 25th October 2009


    Forget impressing her with candlelit dinners, romantic weekends away and endless compliments.

    The secret to a happy marriage is as simple as choosing a wife who is smarter than you and at least five years younger.

    Scientists have developed a distinctly unromantic formula to predict how compatible a couple are, based on their ages, education and relationship history.

    [​IMG] Beyonce Knowles, 28, has had a better education than her husband Jay-Z, 39, as he did not gain a high school diploma

    Most likely to last the distance are couples in which the woman is more educated than the man. He, however, should be five or more years older than her. And neither should have been divorced in the past.

    The finding predicts a healthy future for pop star Beyonce Knowles, 28, and rapper husband Jay-Z, 39. Jay-Z is clearly older but she has the better education, as her husband did not gain a diploma at high school.

    But the research might be less popular with Michael Douglas, 65, and his 40-year-old wife Catherine Zeta-Jones.

    While they satisfy the age gap, they fail on another factor. The study found that a relationship is more likely to fail if one partner has a history of divorce - and this is Douglas's second marriage.

    [​IMG] Michael Douglas, 65, and his 40-year-old wife Catherine Zeta-Jones fail the study on one account - he has been divorced

    Academics, including Dr Emmanuel Fragniere of the University of Bath, studied interviews of more than 1,500 couples who were married or in a serious relationship. Five years later, they followed up 1,000 of the couples, to see which had lasted.

    From this they were able to tease out the factors that create a dream marriage - and those that doom a romance to failure.

    With age, they found that if the wife is five or more years older than her husband, they are more than three times as likely to divorce than if they were the same age.

    Couples in which the husband is the elder by at least five years are least likely to part, the European Journal of Operational Research reports. A good education boosts a couple's chances of staying together, and the future is particularly bright if the wife has the most studying under her belt.

    Analysis of the data also showed the most stable couples were - unsurprisingly - those who have never divorced.

    Curiously, couples in which one member has been through a break-up in the past are less stable than those in which both members have a history of divorce.

    The report concluded: 'It appears men and women "choose" their mates on the basis of love, physical attraction, similarity of taste, beliefs and attitudes, and shared values.' But it said matching couples on 'objective factors' like age, education and cultural origin 'may help reduce divorce'.



    Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1222932/Why-pays-younger-smarter-wife.html#ixzz0V1WyOTie
     
  2. FirstLady1

    FirstLady1 JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Oct 26, 2009
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    asante sana !!!
     
  3. Teamo

    Teamo JF-Expert Member

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    how do you guys prove that certain marriage is happier?
     
  4. Mairo

    Mairo Member

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    This is very good question! Big up Geoff!
     
  5. Mambo Jambo

    Mambo Jambo JF-Expert Member

    #5
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    Geoff before i press another button are you married, au bado upo upo kama sisi makamanda..?
     
  6. Mambo Jambo

    Mambo Jambo JF-Expert Member

    #6
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    Duh...kwa hiyo jamaa wanataka watu wawaache vibibi vyao, then hii itakuwa mwendo box tena kwenda mbele...
     
  7. Chimunguru

    Chimunguru JF-Expert Member

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    Labda kwa ULAYA/Uzunguni
     
  8. Mutensa

    Mutensa JF-Expert Member

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    Oct 26, 2009
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    Swali zuri sana. Hakuna anaeweza kujua kama ndoa ya mwenzie ikon happy au la!!!
    Ni wewe mwenyewe unavyojisikia na mwenzio. Kimsingi, hakuna watu wawili watakaoridhishana katika ndoa kwa kila kitu. Cha msingi ni kushukuru Mungu kwa mema unayoyapata kwa mwenzio na Kumwomba Mungu aepushie mbali mabaya.
    Kwa hiyo siri pekee ya "happy marriage" ni.....
    1. sala na si vinginevyo.
    2. positive attitude towards your spouse.
    3. kuvumiliana na kutobeba mzigo wa manung'uniko
    4. kusahau unapokosewa.
    When these are fullfiled it does not matter who is more educated than the other, who is more wealth, who is short or tall, etc...
     
  9. Mambo Jambo

    Mambo Jambo JF-Expert Member

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    Would say Jigga is more smart than Bey, the dude never been to school but he's a self made millionair from the street.
     
  10. Shishye

    Shishye JF-Expert Member

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    There's no secret to a happy marriage. All you need to know is your Roles & Responsibilities. Basi. Kwisha. If you are married and you dont know your RNRs, you still have a chance. For example; There is a seminar at St. Peter's church Oysterbay on saturday from 8:30am. Go there (if in Dar) register and attend to learn about how to treat yourselves in marriage.

    There're always similar classes elsewhere, look for them and educate yourself to master your environment.
     
  11. Baba_Enock

    Baba_Enock JF-Expert Member

    #11
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    There is no such thing as "Happy Marriage"!

    No one is contented, fortunate or pleased by being married - we simply prentend to and "Life Goes On".

    ECC 1:14 - "I have seen all the things that are done under the sun: all of them are meaningless, a chasing after the wind"
     
  12. NgomaNzito

    NgomaNzito JF-Expert Member

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    Hivi jamii yetu umri wa mke una matter kweli??
     
  13. BAK

    BAK JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Oct 26, 2009
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    Mkuu NN, hili linategemea mtu na mtu. Kwa baadhi ya Wanawake na Wanaume umri wa mume/mke mtarajiwa una play a big role kabla ya kufanya uamuzi huo mzito, na kwa wengine hili halina uzito kabisa. Kwa maoni yangu kwa watarajiwa wengi hili lina uzito mkubwa sana.
     
  14. Teamo

    Teamo JF-Expert Member

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    yah!married
     
  15. Teamo

    Teamo JF-Expert Member

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    mbona hujagonga thanks hapo mkuu?au unasubiri button ya zee?
     
  16. Teamo

    Teamo JF-Expert Member

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    i am not certain with the bolded part
     
  17. Pretty

    Pretty JF-Expert Member

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    Kwenye jamii yetu umri unamatter, mwanaume inabidi awe na umri mkubwa kwa mwanamke.
     
  18. NgomaNzito

    NgomaNzito JF-Expert Member

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    Hivi ukiwa na partner overage ndoa yenu itakuwa poa haina mushkeri
     
  19. Bluray

    Bluray JF-Expert Member

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    A "happy marriage" is an oxymoron, right up there with "friendly fire" and "virtual reality".

    A marriage cannot be happy because it is inanimate, it is a state, not a being.

    The essence of a marriage is for each individual to give up their own pursuit of happiness for a more cohesive co-existence, eventually all ending less happy -because let's face it, the only person you are perfectly compatible with is yourself, and even that sometimes is not true-.

    So this illusion of a "happy marriage" is a good ideal to lure the unmarried into this lock, it is a moral mirage that exists in our collective psyche but never in any critically examined individual household, in the famous words of Emperor Selassie I, it is to be pursued, but never attained.
     
  20. TIMING

    TIMING JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Oct 27, 2009
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    unfortunately, i beg to differ, there is nothing like a total understanding and reflection of any intimate relationship kama ulivyoweka wewe; huwezi kuweka a few lines to represent anything in totality

    Labda uko sahihi, but i wouldnt be happy to dig dip into your way of thinking simply because kuna utopia uliozidi reality, hakuna kisicho na hic-ups na ndio maana hata kama umekamilika unaweza pata discomfort ya aina yoyote ile ndani ya mwili

    Probably tungeanza na definition ya happy marriage
     
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