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Nisahihi kwa mzazi kuendelea kumbana sana msichana ambaye tayari umeshamtolea mahari?

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by The Angel, Mar 23, 2012.

  1. The Angel

    The Angel Member

    #1
    Mar 23, 2012
    Joined: Mar 23, 2012
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    Wana JF
    Mimi ni member mpya wa hili jukwaa but am interested with advice na michango mbalimbali ya kimawazo inayotolewa kwenye hili jukwaa.

    In short kuna binti mmoja nilimpenda na nilimjua kwa kumuona pale nyumbani kwao.Kilichonivutia zaidi kwake ni kua huyu binti anaonekana ni binti anayejiheshimu na mtulivu.Elimu yake ni form 4. Hata siku moja tangu nimjue mwaka juzi sijawahi kumkuta njiani akizurura bila mpango.Muda mwingi anautumia akiwa nyumbani na anaonekana at least kufuata malezi ya kidini. Nilivutiwa na huyu binti na nikamweka kwenye mipango yangu ya kumuoa.Nilipopata nafasi ndogo ya kuongea naye nilijaribu kumshawishi juu ya hilo kwa muda mrefu lakini alikua hanipi jibu la kueleweka mpaka ikabidi nimtumie mama yake mdogo wanayeishi naye.Mama yake mdogo aliongea naye na binti akanikubalia ombi langu.Na mimi sikufanya ajizi haraka nikapeleka washenga, nikatoa mahari na sasa hivi niko kwenye mpango wa maandalizi ya harusi.

    Tatizo langu ni kua huyu binti anamsikiliza sana huyo mama yake mdogo. Alimkataza asimiliki simu na anamkataza asifanye mawasiliano yoyote na mimi mpaka niombe ruhusa kutoka kwake. Nilikua natamani kua na mawasiliano na yeye ili at least niweze kujua ni aina gani ya mwanamke ninayetarajia kumuoa lakini imekua ngumu.

    Issue hapa ni je itakuwaje nikimuoa huyu mwanamke then nikagundua kua hana zile tabia nilizokua nazifikiria? Na je nisahihi kwa mzazi kuendelea kumbana sana msichana ambaye tayari umeshamtolea mahari?

    Naombeni ushauri kabla sijaamua navyofikiria mimi.
     
  2. HorsePower

    HorsePower JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Dogo, unakumbuka shuka kumekucha? Uliwezaje kutoa mahari kwa mtu ambaye haukumfanyia uchunguzi wa tabia zake? Na mbona unatuchanganya kwa kusema anonekana ana tabia nzuri na kalelewa kwenye mazingira ya kidini? Mambo haya uliyajuaje kama haukufanya uchunguzi? Ni tabia gani unazoweza kuzigundua haraka haraka hivyo baada ya kutoa mahari?

    Isije ikawa unatafuta sababu ya kumtolea mahari huyo binti ili upate urahisi wa kumchezea! Kwa sababu mara ya kwanza ulimtumia mama yake mdogo kumpata kama kweli una nia njema unaweza kwenda kwa mama yake mdogo kumuomba uongee naye, hawezi kukukatilia lakini naamini si jambo la busara kuwa unamchukua na kuzurura naye mtaani hovyo. Inaonekana huyo mama yake ana malezi bora na ndiyo maana anamchunga dhidi ya vijana wakware hivyo mi naona wewe mshukuru huyo mama kwa kukutunzia na kukulindia mkeo mtarajiwa badala ya kuanza kuwa na mawazo -ve sasa. Kama ulimpenda we amini yuko hivyo, mambo mengine mtafundishana with time ....

    Na suala la mwisho ni kuwa mi naona ni sahihi mzazi kuendelea kumbana msichana ambaye tayari umeshamtolewa mahari. Hii ni kuepuka msichana kuharibu wakati ameshatolewa mahari na anakaribia kuwa mke wa mtu.
     
  3. fazaa

    fazaa JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Mar 23, 2012
    Joined: May 20, 2009
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    dogo kwenye highlighted nilizo weka ukizifatilia sana mimi naona wewe bado sana kuoa.

    1-Huyo unaye taka kumuoa umemsifu weee afu pale pale una wasi wasi naye, unasema je kama hana tabia ulizo kuwa unafikiria!! Hapo dogo hata dini zinasema ukisha anza anza wasi wasi na unaye taka kumuoa basi ni dhambi hata kumuoa, sababu mtu mwenye shaka shaka mara nyingi huwa anaendelea na shaka zake hivyo ni mbaya kwenye ndoa.

    2-Swali lako je ni vizuri au sahihi kama unavyo sema wewe mzazi kuendelea kumbana sana msichana ambaye tayari umeshamtolea mahari, mimi nasema ni sahihi sababu hujafunga naye ndoa bado hivyo bado sio mke wako.
     
  4. CHAI CHUNGU

    CHAI CHUNGU JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Nipe namba yake ya simu na ya mamake mdogo ili nimchunguze kama anatabia njema!
     
  5. YNNAH

    YNNAH JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Nikwavile natumia simu, ila ningekuwekea katick....
     
  6. mgeni10

    mgeni10 JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Umesema sawa faza , naona huyu kijana sio muoaji, ni muharibifu tu wa kawaida

    huwezi toa sifa nzuri sasa hivi na wewe tena mwenyewe ukawa na mashaka makubwa kiasi hiki
     
  7. Keen

    Keen JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Mar 23, 2012
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    HorsePower: Text yako imetulia!!
     
  8. arabianfalcon

    arabianfalcon JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Umetoa mahari ulidhani ndio tkt yakutoka nae ukajivinjari nae vibanda hasara halafu useme hajatulia huwezi kuoa tena?
     
  9. N

    Ngekewa JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Mar 23, 2012
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    Kijana mwache mama mdogo afanye wajibu wake. Si ulishatwambia kuwa ulimpenda kama alivyo hadi ukaamuwa ukapeleke posa?

    Anachoogopa mam mdogo ni kumfanyia majaribio mwanawe halafu ukamtupa. Umeshaposa kwanza halafu ndio umtambue tabia yake, mbona unatanguliza la nyuma kuwa mbele?

    Kijana kuowa ni sawa na kutia mkono kizani lakini angalau ukijuwa kuwa kwenye hicho kiza hamna ng'e! Angalau wewe mwenyewe umetusifia kuwa mtoto ana tabia nzuri sasa unatakla nini?
     
  10. vanmedy

    vanmedy JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Mar 24, 2012
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    Hiyo ID yako nkajua we 'mudada' kwa hiyo dume unajiita the angel we kweli umekwivaa
     
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