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Nini maana ya kusamehe...?

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Lizzy, Nov 21, 2011.

  1. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Nov 21, 2011
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    [​IMG]
    Ni nini maana halisi ya kusamehe??
    Je ukimsamehe mtu unalazimika kuwa karibu yake tena?? Kurudiana kimapenzi kama ndivyo mlivyokua mwanzo?? Kuongea mara kwa mara kama ndivyo mlivyokua mwanzo? Kutembeleana mara kwa mara kama ndivyo mlivyofanya mwanzo??

    Nauliza kwasababu mara nyingi nimeona/sikia watu wakisema ''mi nilidhani umenisamehe/umemsamehe'' pale wanapotaka mambo yarudi kama mwanzo/au hata yawe zaidi na kuambiwa kwamba haiwezekani. Ina maana ukimsamehe mtu moja kwa moja unategemewa/una jukumu la kumchukulia/treat kama vile hilo kosa alilofanya halikuwahi kutokea?

    Binafsi naamini kwamba kumsamehe mtu ni kile kitendo cha kuachilia (letting go) kile kilichotokea. Kumruhusu awe na amani..na kufungua ukurasa mpya ambao unaweza ukachagua awepo ndani yake au asiwepo na sio kukifuta kabisa alichofanya na kulazimika kurudi mlipokua mwanzo bila mhusika (mkosewaji) kutaka/penda kufanya hivyo. Yani inawezekana kumsamehe rafiki mwizi bila kumkaribisha tena nyumbani kwako...kumsamehe mke/mume/mpenzi cheater bila kurudiana nae tena..kumsamehe ndugu/rafiki mmbea bila kumshirikisha mambo yako tena. I don't know...inawezekana kwa kufanya hivyo mtu anakua hajasamehe ila ndivyo nnavyoamini na kufanya pia...hata mimi siwezi lazimisha/taka/tegemea mtu niliyemkosea na akanisamehe kurudisha mahusiano yetu ya mwanzo kwasababu tu ameniambia ''NIMEKUSAMEHE''. Ntategemea anipotezee/awe karibu na mimi kwasababu anapenda/taka kufanya hivyo na sio kama jukumu linalofuatana na msamaha wake.

    We unaonaje...?
     
  2. Eiyer

    Eiyer JF-Expert Member

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    Kwa mtazamo wangu;Kusamehe nafikiri umeuliza kuhusu watu waliokua kwenye mahusiano.Kama ni hivyo kusamehe hapo kuna mambo yafuatayo;1.Kwanza kumsamehe kuhusiana na tukio alilofanya,hapa mtaendelea kusalimiana na story zingine hii haijalish kama amekutafuta kuja kuomba msamaha au hajaja,unamsamehe as binadam kama wewe.2.Hapa tayari umeshamsamehe na umeamua kuwa nae tena kimahusiano,lakini hili hutegemea sana na mkosaji kama ataonesha utayari huo yaani atakutafuta na kukuomba msamaha na kuomba mahusiano yarudi na yeye kuonesha kuhitaji hilo!
     
  3. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

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    Hata urafiki ni mahusiano...na naongelea mahusiano ya aina yote...kimapenzi..kirafiki..kindugu n.k
    Swali...kumsamehe mtu kunahusiana vipi na utayari wako kurudia mahusiano yenu ya mwanzo???
     
  4. matron

    matron Member

    #4
    Nov 21, 2011
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    Kwa mimi nachukulia msamaha ni lazima nitoe ..kwa imani yangu nisiposamehe nami sitasamehewana bbaba yangu wa mbinguni maana kwa huyu mtu aliyenikosea inawezekana sijawahi kumkwaza/kumkosea lakini haimaanishi kuwa mimi sifanyi makosa au haimaanishi kuwa mimi ni mtakatifu ..msamaha wa kweli hauambatani na masharti..km vile mtu anakwambia nimekusamehe lakini usirudie tena..unasamehe ukiamini mwenzio amejuta ndani yake na anapenda mahusiano yenu ya awali yarudie katika hali yake la sivyo asingesema samahi nisamehe.
    Unaposema nimekusamehe hakikisha umesamehe binafsi kama sijaskia kusamehe huwa nakaa kimya na kujipa muda ili nitafute amani coz siwezi kukuonyesha jino kwa kucheka wakati bado nina uchungu nawe kila mtu ana njia zake za kuondoa uchungu na kuanza upya..kuna mwingine anajiskia kulia mwingine anaongea sana kila mtu kwa jinsi alivyoumbwa ..Msamaha lazima uendane na kuacha kurudia kuliongelea hilo kosa ni njia mojawapo isaidiayo kusahau...
     
  5. Evarm

    Evarm JF-Expert Member

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    Forgive, forget and smile!!!
     
  6. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

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    Kumwambia mtu ''usirudie tena'' ni sharti ama angalizo??
    Kuna ubaya gani kumpa mtu angalizo??Maana hiyo inatumika sana kwa watoto...ni namna ya kumwelewesha mtu kwamba umesamehe alichofanya ila asirudie tena kwasababu sio kitu kizuri. What's wrong with that???
     
  7. Mbu

    Mbu JF-Expert Member

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    Nov 21, 2011
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    ....lizzy, nitakuja "kukusamehe" baadae,...lol...pata clip hii kwanza...tupate pa kuanzia....

     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  8. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

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    kusamehe ni ku let go kama ulivyosema..

    mimi nna ndugu nimewapiga marufuku kuja kwangu ingawa naweza kutuma pesa kuwasaidia..
    nimewasamehe lakini sitaki wanikaribie...kabisa.....huko huko walipo
    tunakutana kwenye harusi au misiba...basi...hakuna simu wala kutembeleana...
     
  9. matron

    matron Member

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    Nov 21, 2011
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    Kwa mtoto kumwambia asirudie tena haimaanishi ataacha kurudia ikiwa hutamweleza madhara ya lile kosa...hiyo ina maana hii ya kwanza hutomchapa ila akirudia utamchapa na adhabu nyingine ..tuje kwa mtu mzima mi sidhani kama itamsaidia sana ingawa ni angalizo lili-lozoeleka sana na tunalitumia sana ila naamini mtu hata ukimwambia asirudie kama hakuomba msamaha wa dhati atasema sirudii na pia atarudia ..hapo tena utaanza kuhesabu kosa .
    Mi nadhani mtu akikuomba msamaha mpe nafasi na umweleze ajitafakarie mwenyewe akiona hicho kitendo naye kinamkera kukikumbuka ndipo msameheane na isiwe anaongea na mdomo ila moyoni haipo
     
  10. MwanajamiiOne

    MwanajamiiOne Platinum Member

    #10
    Nov 21, 2011
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    Mamito hii mada ni pana. Kwangu mimi ninauchukulia msamaha kama kusamehe pasipo doa. Kama ni mwenzi alokukosea unapotamka nimekusamehe kwangu ina maanisha nakusamehe na turudi kama zamani so it means the whole package mydia. Unasamahe na mapenzi yanarudi moto moto as if nothing has happened.

    Kama kuna kusamehe na kisha hamuendelei mimi nadhani YAMEKWISHA is more appropriate than NIMEKUSAMEHE. Yamekwisha but kila mtu aendelee na maisha yake. Kwangu mie KUSAMEHE ina maanisha ni pamoja na kuzika na kusahau lililojiori.
     
  11. Black Rose

    Black Rose JF-Expert Member

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    Nov 21, 2011
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    Hata simu? Kwanini lakini?
     
  12. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

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    halafu kusamehe bila 'yule aliekosea' kuomba msamaha nayo ni kazi bure...

    unasikia mtu anasema 'mie nimeshamsamehe'

    wakati huyo 'aliesamehewa' wala hakuwahi kusema 'alikosa'

    hii inawakuta wadada weengi sana.......eti nimemsamehe tumerudiana..

    wakati kidume kina endelea ku 'bully tu mdada'
    sad....
     
  13. lolyz

    lolyz JF-Expert Member

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    Nov 21, 2011
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    Iliwahi nitokea my best friend alinipa siri imhusuyo bf wangu ambaye sasa ni hubby nilipomuatak hubby kwa zile data hubby alikuwa mkali kwa kukataa na kudai aliyeniambia ni muongo na kunibana kuwa kwann namuamin mtoa siri over him kwa kiusingizia eti huyo aliyekwambia lazima mna affair na mm kwa kuijamani ikanilazimu nimtaje best friend ambaye ni (she)
    U can imagine baada ya hapo iliniuma kwa kuwa nilimuahid best kuwa sitokutaja hata iweje..na nilijuta sana moyoni kweli niliomba samahani kwa best na alinisamehe na maisha yalirudia kama zamani kwangu mm nilihesabu ule ulikuwa msamaha wa kweli(nimetoa hii kwa mahusiano ya kawaida tu)
     
  14. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

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    Nov 21, 2011
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    Hehehehhe...
    Asante Mbu kwa clip...nasubiria huo msamaha niloahidiwa sasa!
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  15. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

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    sina kabisa 'culture' ya kupiga simu za chit chat
    hata wale 'marafiki na ndugu'
    nikipiga simu basi kuna kitu cha maana cha kuzungumza
    sifanyi chit chat kwenye simu....
     
  16. Mbu

    Mbu JF-Expert Member

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    ...kusamehe gharama,....mwj1 nisamehe na mimi basi...lol



    ...msamaha unategemeana na mhusika na kosa lenyewe...

    kwangu mimi inategemeana impact ya kukosewa huko kulivyo athiri maisha yangu.
    kuna makosa yanasamaheka na kusahaulika,
    kuna makosa yanasameheka lakini hayasahauliki, na
    kuna makosa hayasameheki wala hayasahauliki!

     
  17. bht

    bht JF-Expert Member

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    Nov 21, 2011
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    Lizzy kusamehe ni jambo moja na kurudia mahusiano kama vile mwanzo ni jambo tofauti, kwangu hii pia inategemea na kosa lenyewe. Kama ni kosa dogo tu basi twaweza jirahidi kurudi kama zamani.
    Lakini kukosewa kwingine hata ukiamua kuyaachilia yapite bado hamuwezi kuwa kama zamani kamwe.

    Kwanza kumbuka hapo tayarri mahusiano yenu...hapa namaanisha mahusiano yawayo yote yale, tayari yameingia dosari, sasa mtakuwaje kama zamani!
     
  18. BPM

    BPM JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Nov 21, 2011
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    hapa kuna mambo ambayo yanaendana kulingana na uzito wa kosa lenyewe

    kwanza: aliyekosa anaweza kuomba msamaha lakini si wa kutoka moyoni yaani mradi

    pili : muombwaji msamaha anaweza kusema kasemehe lakini si kutoka moyoni

    hapa hupelekea kila wakati mtu kuishi kwa tahadhari kwa kila wakati kuhisi atafanyiwa zaidi
     
  19. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

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    Nov 21, 2011
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    Boss mimi na wewe tupo kwenye ukurasa mmoja...ila naona tunatofautiana na MJ hapo chini.

    Aiseee...
    Kwahiyo mami unataka kuniambia kwamba kwa mtazamo wako mtu akikwambia amekusamehe ili uhusiano mliokua nao unakoma/hautorudi kama mwanzo anakua hajakusamehe???Kwanini unadhani kusamehe bila kurudi mlipokua sio kusamehe kweli?
     
  20. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Nov 21, 2011
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    Mbu,
    Kwahiyo mwisho wa siku unaweza ukamsamehe mtu (given kosa lake linaruhusu) ila ukashindwa kurudisha mahusiano yenu ya mwanzo hivyo kila mmoja kwenda na njia zake/mkapunguza ukaribu?
     
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