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Nimwacheje Mpenzi huyu?

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by sospeter, Apr 19, 2009.

  1. s

    sospeter Member

    #1
    Apr 19, 2009
    Joined: Apr 13, 2009
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    Wadau wa JF
    Nawashukuru sana kwa ushauri wenu , na kweli hapa ni kituo cha kupata majawabu . Pasipo na taarifa na ushauri kweli maaangamivu ni dhahiri. Kwa hilo Bravo saana.
    Kuhusina na mada ya “Kama ungekuwa wewe ungefanyeje” Nimefanya uchunguzi wangu kulingana na maoni mabalimbalai ya wana JF na nimegundua kuwa mwenzi wangu sio mwaminifu . Nimechunguza sana na kugundua kuna watu bado wanmmega na nikimwambia anakataa. Nampenda sana. Nimejaribu kivyangu kumuacha lakini inashindikana , kwani haipiti dk 5 sijamwaza , na nikimuwaza naumia sana roho yangu na nakumbuka siku niliyokutana naye ya kwanza. Naumia sana roho inaruka tu kila mara na hata tu nikisikia sauti yake . Mwishowe najiuliza au kanitendea nini huyu bibi.
    Kwa hali iliyopo ya sasa mie niemechunguza afya yangu iko saafi , pamoja na kukaa naye kwa muda mrefu ya uchumba. Baada ya kugundua hayo nikimwambia akachunguze afya yake hataki anasema ataenda akipenda yeye na sio kwa kulazimishwa. Nikisikia tu sauti yake nashindwa hata kuconcetrate kitu chochote.
    Je ni njia gani niiitume ili niweze kumwacha na kutokuendelea kuumia kiasi hiki?
    Je katika wachangiaji kuna yeyote aliyekutana na dhoruba hii na kama yupo katika depth ipi ya mapenzi aliyokuwa nayo, na je alitumia njia gani kuweza kuondokana na hii adha?
     
  2. Abdulhalim

    Abdulhalim JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Apr 19, 2009
    Joined: Jul 20, 2007
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    Pole sana mkuu, hizo ndizo gharama za kupenda.

    Jinsi ya kumwacha huyo umpendae ni rahisi tu. Futa kumbukumbu zake zote,kuanzia picha, sms, emails na mengine yote ambayo wewe unayafahamu kuwa yanakukumbusha machungu.

    Halafu hakikisha unajiweka bize kwa kazi, masomo au kufanya ibada sana. Hii itaifanya akili yako kuwa bize. Jaribu hili kwa kipindi kisichopungua miezi 2 kutegemea na nafasi yako.

    Mengine nadhani wadau watakusaidia zaidi.

    Be blessed.
     
  3. Nyani Ngabu

    Nyani Ngabu Platinum Member

    #3
    Apr 19, 2009
    Joined: May 15, 2006
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    Duh! Pole sana aisee. Wewe mwache tu mengine yote yatajipa yenyewe. Najua ni vigumu lakini pima haya mawili: uendelee kuwa kwenye huo uhusiano na kudhalilishwa utu na uanaume wako au kumwacha na kuvumilia maumivu kwa muda mfupi na kuwa mtu mwenye amani na furaha baadae?
     
  4. BAK

    BAK JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Apr 19, 2009
    Joined: Feb 11, 2007
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    Pole sana. Siyo rahisi kumuacha mchumba unayempenda kiasi hicho bila kuumia roho, lakini usisahau pia kwamba unaweza kumsamehe kama unaona anaweza kuamua kutulia lakini tatizo lililopo hata maovu aliyoyafanya hajayakubali.

    Piga konde moyo na umove with you life usifanye haraka ya kutafuta mwingine maana bado utakuwa kwenye majonzi ya kuachana na kipenzi chako. Subiri mpaka hapo utakajiona uko tayari kuanza penzi jipya. Kila la heri na pole sana.
     
  5. Andindile

    Andindile JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Apr 19, 2009
    Joined: Mar 18, 2009
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    Hebu jiulize, kuachana mkiwa wachumba au kuja kuachana mkiwa na familia ya watoto let say wa nne kipi bora na ukimwi juu na miongoni mwa watoto nao wakiwa nao. Mshukuru Mungu kwa kukufunulia na kukuepusha na balaa mapema kabla hali haijawa mbaya zaidi. Mara nyingi tunapenda kupuuzia dalili zote zinazojionyesha na hasa ukiwa na mchumba ambaye hata ngono mnashirikiana. Kwa sehemu kubwa kinachotokea ni kucare kupita kiasi bila kumpima muhusika kama ni mtu anayefaa kujikomiti naye kimaisha hata pale unapoambiwa kuwa hatari ipo mbele yako inatakiwa kuepukwaa.
     
  6. I

    Ikena JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Apr 19, 2009
    Joined: Oct 24, 2007
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    Pole sana blaza, nachelea kusema pengine ushalishwa ile kitu.
    Nenda kwenye kanisa la kiroho, na kemea roho iyo ya ibilisi pia umwombe Mungu akupe mke mwema.
     
  7. Mbu

    Mbu JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Apr 19, 2009
    Joined: Jan 11, 2007
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    ...usipoziba ufa utakuja ujenga ukuta ...hayo niliyoyawekea rangi ya hatari na kuyapigia msitari yazingatie, ...'akitembea' na partner mwingine mmoja mwenye UKIMWI, ujue nawe utapata 'share' yako ya ~Umeme~...

    Akili kumkichwe!
     
  8. Mbu

    Mbu JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Apr 19, 2009
    Joined: Jan 11, 2007
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    ...sidhani kama kalambishwa, anajitia 'wazimu' mwenyewe... :(

    Mapenzi sawa na Imani, yaani unaamini bila yeye hana thamani! it's all about self esteem. Amua; kupoteza heshima na maisha yako kwa kumpenda huyo binti, ...au jijengee heshima kwa kuchukua uamuzi mgumu, lakini wenye manufaa kwako na jamii hiyo inayokuzunguka?

    'Bora ya nusu shari, kuliko shari kamili'; inaelekea ukishamuoa huyo umekwisha!
     
  9. S

    StoneTown Senior Member

    #9
    Apr 19, 2009
    Joined: May 28, 2007
    Messages: 108
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    ASALAMU ALAYKUM.

    Jambo lolote ambalo maamuzi yake ni magumu unapaswa kuzingatia na kufikiri mara mbili tatu then uamue ingelikuwa ni mke ningekushauri ufikiri sana lakini ni mwanamke tu unapaswa kuachana naye hata kwa sababu kwanza umevuka mipaka ya maadili ya dini yako ama ikiwa muislamu au mkristo hutakiwi kukaa kinyumba na mwanamke kabla ya ndoa hivyo hatua ya kwanza unapaswa kumshukuru Mungu kwa kukutanabakisha mapema kutokana na maovu yako, hatua ya pili piga konde moyo na ujizatiti kama wewe ni mwanamme na huwezi kuendeshwa pute na mwanamke ingawa ni ngumu lakini bila ya shaka unaweza ukiamua na umsahau kabisa na kama alivyotoa ushauri mwenzangu mmoja huko juu lazima uji keep busy ili oondokane na hayo mawazo lakini jitahidi sana ku ignore mawazo yanayokujia kuhusiana na yeye jitahidi ufute fute kumbukumbu zake katika moyo wako.

    Hizo ndio gharama za kujaribu mapenzi pole sana sana lakini ningekupa darasa la kuachana naye na bila ya shaka ungeweza tu maana mambo hayo ni magumu tunavyoyaona lakini ni mepesi mno kwa wajuzi na ni kazi ndogo tu kwani si unajua wanawake wanavyojua ku fix mambo? unaweza kusahau kila kila kitu.

    bye
     
  10. Pretty

    Pretty JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Apr 19, 2009
    Joined: Mar 19, 2009
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    Huyo binti sio mwaminifu, hivyo hakufai. Bado tu unamuwaza! kumbuka "Heri nusu shari kuliko shari nzima" Nafuu tu umuache hivi sasa maana uchumba si ndoa, kuliko aje kukupa ukimwi hapo baadaye maana huyu binti kicheche. Kama unafanya kazi jaribu kuwa busy na kazi, ukirudi home soma bible kwa sana najua ni mkristo ww, fanya maombi. ukifanya hivyo vitu utamsahau tu.
     
  11. Mbu

    Mbu JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Apr 19, 2009
    Joined: Jan 11, 2007
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    ...mnh, sidhani kama ni rahisi hivyo, yataka moyo kuisoma biblia kisha kuipinga!,

    mfano; angalieni maneno yenyewe (ya kumfariji) yaliyopo kwenye biblia;



    ...hakuna ushauri mwingine wa kumpa huyu braza kabla 'hajadata?'
     
  12. Pretty

    Pretty JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Apr 20, 2009
    Joined: Mar 19, 2009
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    kweli neno linasema upendo ni uvumilivu, kusamehe. Inabidi kweli amsamehe na ampende, ila ubaki urafiki wa kawaida wa dada na kaka. Usidhubutu umsamehe kwa kumrudia na awe mpenzi wako tena wa kulala na kufanya ngono.
     
  13. Nyamayao

    Nyamayao JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Apr 20, 2009
    Joined: Jan 22, 2009
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    pole sana bro, piga moyo konde usonge mbele, najua ni ngumu but inabidi ujitahidi! akiingia ndani huyu atakutesa milele.
     
  14. Mhache

    Mhache JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Apr 20, 2009
    Joined: Jun 20, 2008
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    Dogo huyo binti hakufai? Achana naye. Iwapo utaendelea ipo siku yeye atakuacha kwa sababu anaona unamind sana. kama hataki kwenda kucheki afya yake anakupendea nini? Au unampa hela nyingi. Jikaze mwanaume, mwache tu ipo siku utapata mwingine bora kuliko huyo. Pole na Mungu akupe njia njema. bye.
     
  15. M

    Msindima JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Apr 20, 2009
    Joined: Mar 30, 2009
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    Mshukuru Mungu kwa kukuonyesha mapema hayo mambo ya huyo dada Mungu anakupenda sana na hakutaka upotee thus why hayo yakajitokeza mapema.Kama wenzangu walivyokushauri,jitahidi sana kuwa bize na kazi na kama nilivyosoma jina lako yaelekea wewe ni Mkristo jitahidi sana kwenda kwenye ibada,jichanganye na watu,usiruhusu muda mwingi kuwa pake yako hiyo iakusaidia sana.Jiulize hili swali Kabla hujakutana na huyo dada nadhani ulikua na Amani na furaha,kwa nini unaruhusu amani yako na furaha ivurugwe na mtu mwingine?Huwa nawambia watu hivi mimi sitaki mtu mwingine awe controller wa maisha yangu kwa hiyo nawe usiliruhusu hili though i know kwamba ni ngumu kumwacha jitahidi na Mungu atakusaidia.
     
  16. Fidel80

    Fidel80 JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Apr 20, 2009
    Joined: May 3, 2008
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    1. Mkuu punguza speed ya kuwasiliana nae.
    2. Mtishie kumla tiGo kama hujawahi zungumzia au mwambie mi sasa basi hata tiGo hujawahi nipa.
    3. Kama ulikuwa unamtoa toa out kiana kata kabisa out zote.
    4. Tafuta kifaa/toto i/kingine kinacho mzidi huyo umbile,sura n.k
    5. Kama ulikuwa unamlea lea kumtumia vocha na pesa kidogo kila week end kata huduma hizo.
    6. Mchimbe mkwala au akitaka kuja kwako getto mkwepe unaweza ukamwambia upo mbali n.k
    7. Akizima fegi mpe ukweli sasa kuwa wewe na yeye basi aendelee na mapedeshee.
     
  17. M

    Msindima JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Apr 20, 2009
    Joined: Mar 30, 2009
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    kaka huo ushauri wako umenizcha hoi,mapema yote hii aanze kutafuta kifaa kingine,wakati alichonacho kinamshinda kukiacha,mpe mbinu mbadala ya kumwacha huyo dada, na akishamwacha akae kwanza atulie kwa muda,ajipange upya,hata kabla hujaanza ujenzi unakaa na kuangalia gharama za huo ujenzi,kwa hiyo lazima akae kwa muda ajipange upya.
     
  18. Ng`wanakidiku

    Ng`wanakidiku JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Apr 20, 2009
    Joined: Apr 18, 2009
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    Duh pole sana!
    Kwa undani wa mahusiano mliyofikia wewe na mchumba wako ni ya juu sana na pengine ndiyo muda pekee ambao wewe upo juu sana kuliko yeye. Sasa katika hali isoyo ya kawaida mambo hayo hutokea si kwako tu ni kwa watu wengi, na pengine tunaweza kusema ni IBILISI kawaingilia katika mahusianon yenu. Mimi ushauri ambao naweza kukupatia ni wa aina mbili.
    1. Uendelee naye (Provided kama una imani ya kuamini katika kumuomba mungu ambadilishe), unatakiwa utoe muda wa kumuomba mungu na utakapoona hakuna majibu basi elewa si mpango wa mungu wewe kuwa naye.
    2. UACHANE NAYE! katika hili ni zito kwani utahitaji yafuatayo!
    Ufuate kanuni ya Replacement reaction! maana katika kanuni wewe ulizoea kuwa na huyo mwenzako sasa ni vigumu ukamuacha na kuwa idle kwani utajikuta unamuwaza yeye tu ila kama utajitahidi kutafuta mahusiano miongoni mwa wasichana ulionao karibu wewe waombe wakupe kampani na unaweza kustahimili, na kama utakuwa alone inaweza kuwa ngumu sana na utajikuta amekuambukiza HIV.
    Nina mfano halisi wa mtu mmoja aliekuwa na tatizo kama la kwako, yeye alikuwa mwanafunzi wa IFM na alikuwa na mahusianao na mchumba wake kwa zaidi ya miaka minne, na ilipofika wakati wa kutokuelewana na mchumba wake na kugundua anachukuliwa na watu wengine, jamaa alichanganyikiwa na hakufahamu la kufanya, ila baada ya ushauri aliamua kuachana naye, akapima akakuta yupo safi. Demu aliendelea kutesa mpaka mwaka jana 2008 demu aliugua sana nusu akate roho, na baada ya kupima alikutwa na HIV, hivyo mshikaji mpaka sasa anashukuru kuachana naye.
     
  19. Che Kalizozele

    Che Kalizozele JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Apr 20, 2009
    Joined: Jul 20, 2008
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    Yaani wewe,uwezi kuzungumza au kushauri bila ya kuingiza suala la express yourself,inayokupa zaidi.Utadhani umelogezewa.
     
  20. Che Kalizozele

    Che Kalizozele JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Apr 20, 2009
    Joined: Jul 20, 2008
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    Kwanza inabidi ukubaliane na hali halisi kwamba mdada huyu hakufai,ukishakubaliana na moyo wako mambo mengine yatakuwa mepesi.Katu akili yako isikudanganye eti uwezi kuishi bila ya yeye au eti hauwezi kumuacha,huo wote ni uongo.Muumba alijua matatizo yote haya ndio maana akaumba wengi,just keep on fishing,there are alot of fishing grounds
     
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