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Nifanye nini katika hali hii??????

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by NewDawnTz, Dec 21, 2010.

  1. NewDawnTz

    NewDawnTz JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Dec 21, 2010
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    Japo bado sijaona njia nyeupe na sahihi zaidi, NINA KILA SABABU YA KUWASHUKURU WANA JF mliotoa mawazo yenu juu ya nini nifanye kuhusiana na suala zima la dogo kama nilivyoandika hapa chini.

    Baada ya kumtext dogo na kumwambia tunaheshimu uamuzi wake na niko tayari kumsikiliza na kumuelewa bila kumu-offend amenitafuta na nimeongea nae kwa muda mrefu sana.

    Alichoniambia ni kwamba alifanya uamuzi huo binafsi kwani alifikia mahali kutambua kuwa hawezi kukaa nae tena na lijiona kumpenda zaidi huyu mwingine waliesoma nae chuo.

    Ukweli ni kwamba dogo is like he doesn't care juu ya mwenzake aliemuacha mwanza. Ni kama anacheza mchezo Fulani wa kuigiza mpaka nikahisi au HILI TOTO LIMELOGWA NINI. Eti ananiambia alishindwa tu kumuacha na kumwambia hamtaki kwa sababu tayari alishampa mimba na hivyo amekubaliana na mke wake mpya kuwa aendelee kukaa nae kwa muda mpaka apone kidonda kasha amuambie kuwa ameoa mwanamke mwingine na hivyo hana mpango wa kukaa nae ila amuachie tu mtoto aendelee kutunza yeye akaendelee na mipango mingine ya maisha.

    Pia anasema aliamua kutokututaarifu sisi wala wazazi wake kwa sababu anasema tungemtibulia na mpango wake ni kuwa mwanzoni mwa mwezi ujao ndio ataweka wazi kwa kila mtu juu ya uamuzi wake. Mawazo yake itakuwa siri kama anavyotaka kichwani mwaka huku akisahau kuwa mama yake yuko kwenye constant contact na wazazi wa binti. Ndo maana nasema limelogwa hili toto.

    Kwa ushauri wenu nimeonelea nimtume tu mke wangu week hii akamchukue toka Mwanza aje tuishi nae kwa muda huu. Dogo nimemwambia kuwa atampigia simu na kumtaarifu kuwa amwambie binti aambatane nasi kasha anipe jibu kama amekubali ili wife ndio akamchukue.





    KWA WALE AMBAO HAWAKUISOMA AWALI STORY NI HII HAPA CHINI

    Here is the story:-
    [FONT=&quot]
    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]Nina kijana mmoja ambae ni mtoto wa kwanza wa mama mdogo ambae alikuwa anaishi mojawapo za wilaya mkoani Arusha. Huyu kijana alikuwa na rafiki yake wa kike toka mwaka 98 walipomaliza elimu ya Msingi na kwa ukomavu wao wa wakati ule wakakubaliana wataoana siku za usoni baada ya yeye kumaliza masomo. Matokeo yalipotoka dogo akapata shule ya sekondari na akaenda kusoma (binti hakubahatika na wazazi hawakuweza kumsomesha) na baada ya kumaliza kidato cha 4 mwaka 2002 matokeo yake hayakuwa mazuri akawa tu yuko nyumbani. Hata hivyo aliamua baadae kurisiti baadae kupata credit zinazotakiwa. Mwaka 2006 aliamua kuendelea na chuo cha ualimu kuchukua Grade IIIA ya ualimu na baadae kupangwa Mwanza kufundisha. [/FONT]

    [FONT=&quot]Katika kipindi hiki chote binti alikuwa bado yuko nyumbani akipangua kila aina ya kaushawishi kanakokuja ili kuhakikisha anadumisha na kulinda kile alichokubaliana na mwenzake kuwa amngoje na akimaliza masomo angekuja wafunge wote ndoa.

    Katika wakati wote dogo alijiandaa kuwa angemuoa na mwaka 2009 mwishoni alikuja nyumbani kutuambia kuwa yuko tayari kufunga nae ndoa hivyo tujiandae kwa maswala ya kuonana na wazazi wake. Hivyo tukawa tumekaa tayari tunangoja tusikie atakapotuambia yuko tayari twende na akawa ametuunga na huyu binti ili tuendelee kumtia moyo kwamba mwenzake yuko tayari kumuoa na amngoje. HIVI NDIVYO ILIVYOKUWA HADI JUZI.

    Mwanzoni mwa mwaka huu dogo alituomba muda akamilishe maswala yake kadhaa kisha atakuja kutuambia rasmi ni lini mipango ianze. Wakati huu akaenda pia na kwao binti ili kumkumbushia kuwa bado anaikumbuka ahadi ile na kwa bahati (sijui ni mbaya au nzuri) wakakutana kimwili na binti akapata ujauzito.


    UTATA ULIPO:

    Jana jioni nikapigiwa simu na rafiki wa karibu wa dogo akinitaarifa ya kuwa kijana wetu huyu wiki iliyoisha amefunga ndoa ya kiserikali na binti mwingine ambae walisoma wote chuoni. [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Hii inamaanisha alifanya kinyemela na wala sisi hatuna taarifa yoyote. Rafiki yake huyu mwenyewe anadai tarifa hii hakuwa nayo bali alizipata news lately na kutafuta ushahidi na akagundua ndoa ilifungwa Bomani na kusherehekewa Kijenge Arusha ambako yeye yupo ikawa rahisi kwake kuthibitisha. [/FONT]

    [FONT=&quot]Hivi sasa ninapoandika, yule binti hajui kama mwenzake kaoa mwingine na kibaya ni kwamba kijana alimbeba mwenzake akampeleka kwenye nyumba anayokaa Mwanza na amemuacha huko akiwa amemwambia amekuja Arusha tu kwa majukumu kadhaa na atarudi mwakani mwanzoni wakati shule zinafunguliwa.

    [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Kwa sasa binti anamtoto mchanga na amejifungua wiki chache tu zilizopita huku mshono wa operesheni ukiwa mbichi.

    Sasa mimi ndie nilieko kati yao kama mwangalizi na mtu ambae ninapaswa kuchukua jukumu lolote, nimekaa usiku kucha kichwa kinaniuma najiuliza maswali mengi[/FONT]

    • [FONT=&quot]Kwa nini dogo kanificha na kafanya upumbavu wote huu???[/FONT]
    • [FONT=&quot]Kwa nini amemchezea mwenzake na kumdanganya namna hii???[/FONT]
    • [FONT=&quot]Na kinachoniumiza zaidi ni nafanya nini mimi hasa nikimuweka huyu binti ambae nilitarajia ndo atakuwa shemeji yangu?? Je nimwambie sasa, je sitamuumiza kwa mshono alionao sasa??? huyu kijana nawezaje kuficha na inakuwaje??[/FONT]
    [FONT=&quot]Kwa kweli hata kufikiria nahisi kama nimefika mwisho wa uwezo wangu wa kufikiri na hapa nimekaa ofisini lakini hamna kitu kinaweza kwenda. Najaribu kuwaza kumtuma mke wangu aende kuonana na binti huyu huko Mwanza alipachwa (kwa sasa tuko Dom) lakini nashindwa kuelewa lipi sahihi la kufanya[/FONT][/SIZE][/SIZE][/COLOR][/COLOR][/COLOR][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE]
     
  2. L

    Ledwin JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Dec 21, 2010
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    wasiliana na Dogo kwanza,mkuu.
     
  3. NewDawnTz

    NewDawnTz JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Dec 21, 2010
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    Ledwin Ahsante Mkuu,
    Niliwaza jammbo hili ila tatizo dogo mwenyewe mshenzi sana amekuwa kama sikio la kufa nampigia hapokei. Nikabadilisha namba ya simu nikatumia ya mtu ambayo haijui liliposikia sauti yangu likakata. Najaribu kupiga mahesabu sijui niende Ar, lakini nitalipata wapi hili toto!!!
     
  4. p

    pierre JF-Expert Member

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    Kama kule Mwanza aliko ni nyumba ya huyu aliyeoa,basi mwache atulie mpaka apate nguvu ndio umweleze.Ila asijihangaishe kusema anaondoka kwenye hiyo nyumba,yeye atulie tuli jamaa atamchoka tu huyu waliyefunga naye naye ndoa ya bomani na kwa kuwa watakuwa wamepanga basi atarudi tu Mwanza.
    Ila alichofanya dogo sio kitu kizuri,ila mengi hatujui cha kufanya ni mpaka tupate kisa kamili kutoka kwa huyu aliyeamua kuoa kimya kimya,maana mambo ya ndoa bwana!!!!Ni afadhali kujihami mapema kabla hujazama kabisa.
     
  5. The Finest

    The Finest JF-Expert Member

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    Dec 21, 2010
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    Aisee hii ni XXL yaani kubwa kuliko
     
  6. NewDawnTz

    NewDawnTz JF-Expert Member

    #6
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    Bado naendelea na juhudi za kumtafuta na hapatikani. Kibaya ni kwamba hata mama yake mzazi hana taarifa hivi nampigia simu niongee nae anashangaa na anaanza kulia kwamba imekuwaje.

    Nimemuuliza rafiki yake ananiambia kwamba aliongea nae japo hakumpa ushirikiano na alichosema yeye ni kwamba kwa sasa anataka amuache mwenzake Mwanza mapaka apone kisha amwambie kuwa HAMTAKI TENA MAANA HANA ELIMU NA HAWEZI CHANGI AMAISHA YAKE na ya kuwa sasa amekuwa zamani ilikuwa utoto.

    Kwa kweli the whole story is confusing and XXL kama unavyosema The Finest
     
  7. klorokwini

    klorokwini JF-Expert Member

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    kuna matatizo mengine hayatatuliwi kidiplomasia, kama ni mimi ningelim google huyo dogo halaf nikamrembea mitama na nikampa mbili tatu za uso. huyo dogo ni mzembe kuliko dictionary la uzembe.
     
  8. hee-wewe

    hee-wewe Member

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    Dec 21, 2010
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    jamani kafanaya unyama mkubwa sna kwa binti wa watu,,, hata huruma hana, mwenzio mzazi tena. hata kuna dada moja kafanyiwa hivyo, jamaa kawowa, kaachiwa mtoto, watu wahuni sana,, yaani do! inabidi umweleze huyo dada kinachoendelea lakini baadae kidogo, na mkeo asiende huko maana akimkuta jamaa anaweza aanzishe vagi lingine,,, we mtafute uwongee naye,,
    kila lakheri
     
  9. NewDawnTz

    NewDawnTz JF-Expert Member

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    Ahasante sana, juhudi kubwa ninayofanya ni kumtafuta dogo. Kwa sasa kaamua kuzima simu ila nimemtext kumwambia kuwa naelewa ujinga liofanya lakini haya ni maamuzi ya masisha yake na hivyo tunayaheshimu lakini anipe basi hata heshima ndogo ya kunisikiliza. Nasubiri akiwasha simu ikiwa delivered nimemwambia ani-flash kwenye simu yangu nipate kuongea nae
     
  10. Roulette

    Roulette JF-Expert Member

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    Pole sana mkuu
    Ningekua wewe ninge focus zaidi kwa vitu under my own control. Huyo mdogo wako amesha haribu na anaonekana hataki kusikia lolote. Bora umuone yule mwenzake na umwambie yote unayo yajua hadi sasa. In the mean time wewe na mkeo mjiandae kumsuport huyo dada for the time you think you can handle it.
    Sooner or later dogo ataibuka tu na itabidi a-take responsibility for his act. you might feel responsible but you are not, let them feel the problem is theirs, not yours. and let them know you are willing to assist, not to take over problems zao na kuzigeuza za kwako.
     
  11. NewDawnTz

    NewDawnTz JF-Expert Member

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    Well noted brother. Actual this is what at least I am thinking of doing. You know i have been so close to the two. Am real sorry for the girl zaidi ya mdogo wangu. May be he is happy now, but the second side of coin, what will happen to her?? My plan is to send my wife to go and talk to her and see what next.

    I know there is no way you can keep a secret and this force me to try to check if i can dispose it to her wakati huu. Ila naogopa labda anawexza kuumia sana na kuathiri kidonda cha operation. Its real confusing, na kila ninachopanga kufanya naona kitaumiza.

    Sasa hivi ninakazi na mama yake mwenyewe naambiwa presha huko imempanda na amepelekwa hospital maana hakuwahi kudhani kama kuna siku angetokewa na kituo cha jinsi hii
     
  12. Maty

    Maty JF-Expert Member

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    No ni XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXL kabisa mi nimeishiwa hata ya kusema
     
  13. funzadume

    funzadume JF-Expert Member

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    mbona unaumia sana kwa matatizo ya watu wengine, achana nao and mind your own business hilo limeshatokea na huwezi kubadilisha mawazo ya mtu afanye kama unavyotaka wewe na pia huyo kijana ameshaoa so cha kumshauri hapo ni kuwa atunze mtoto wake aliyezaa na huyo binti kwani kama ndoa tayari imefungwa na heshimuni hayo maamuzi yake

    Nakushauri usiumize kichwa chako kwa huyo ndugu yako na msichana aliyemzalisha utakonda bure wakati ndg yako hata habari hana na ameshaanza kukupotezea kwenye simu, hivi vitu vipo duniani kote so mid ur own business kama vp mshauri huyo binti aende kumshitaki jamaa ili awe analeta matumizi ya mtoto na sio kutengua maamuzi ya nduguyo ya kuoa
     
  14. Maty

    Maty JF-Expert Member

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    usimwambie huyo dada kwanza mpaka kidonda kipone, dah nimesikitikaje? ila nyinyi kama familia mjitahidi mumsaidie huyo dada mpaka mambo yake angalau yakae sawa but believe me huyo mdogo wako atakuja kupata mikasa ya kusikitisha mpaka ajute maisha yake yote what goes around normally comes around
     
  15. NewDawnTz

    NewDawnTz JF-Expert Member

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    Ni kweli funza dume. Iwish i manage to do what you advice. The problem is dogo is more than a brother to my aunt.

    And you know what, jukumu lilikuwa mikononi mwangu la kufanikisha dogo kuoa huyu binti na mimi sina huruma na dogo kama nilivyosema awali ila kinachoniumiza ni binti wa watu!!!

    Na hapa natafuta kitu sahihi cha kufanya ili kumsaidia. You know what, try to be in the shoes of this lady and you will know about it.

    Hapa mke wangu mwenyewe kachanganyikiwa anajaribu kuhisi angekuwa yeye ingekuwaje baada ya kupata taarifa hizi hasa akizingatia kawa muaminifu na kumngoja mwenzio kwa kipindi cha zaidi ya kumi na moja (11 years waitning in vain))???
     
  16. Maty

    Maty JF-Expert Member

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    you can say that again
     
  17. NewDawnTz

    NewDawnTz JF-Expert Member

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    What you want me to say again Maty??? Ninachomwambia Funza Dume ni kujaribu kuwa kwenye nafasi ya huyu dada halafu ataona maumivu yake. Jana mke wangu alilia kila akifikiri na kibaya ni pale tunapowaza mpaka kumuhamishia Mwanza what was he intending. Nini kiko kichwani mwake??/
     
  18. Maty

    Maty JF-Expert Member

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    nilikua nasisitizia tu hapo kaka angu yaani nini funza yeyote ajiweke kwenye nafasi ya huyo dada halafu apime maumivu yake
     
  19. NewDawnTz

    NewDawnTz JF-Expert Member

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    Jana Mke wangu aliniacha hoi akaniambia angekuwa yeye, kusikia tu taarifaa hii, angeweka historia ya mtu aliekutwa na mauti kasimama na akaendelea kuwa mautini huku kasimama wima kama kagandishwa na bonge la barafu
     
  20. Maty

    Maty JF-Expert Member

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    ni kweli kabisa asemayo mkeo mimi mwenyewe nilivyosoma kwanza niliganda kwa muda na huyo mdada simjui, kwa mkeo nadhani ana hali mbaya tu. Ila uyo mdogo wako mengine ni ujana tu unamsumbua wakikaa wanadanganyana na hata kutopokea simu yako anawaza atakujibu nini ila kiukweli hii strori inasikitisha sana
     
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