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Ni kitu gani...?!

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Lizzy, Aug 9, 2011.

  1. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Aug 9, 2011
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    Kila mtu anajua nini haswa kilichomvutia/mpendeza hata kutaka/kukubali kuo/kuolewa au hata kua na mpenzi aliye nae.Hata wale ambao hawana wapenzi wana idea ya nini kinachoweza kumvutia kwa mtarajiwa wake!

    Swali: je ni kitu gani kinachoweza kukufanya uachane na mke/mme/mpenzi wako?!Ni kitu gani unafikiri akifanya au kikitokea kwenye mahusiano yenu baada ya muda hutoweza kuendelea kuvumilia?!

    Binafsi vitu ambavyo vinaweza kuniondolea yale mapenzi nlokua nayo mwanzo ni ....
    1. Kunipiga - mwanaume kuniinulia mkono mwanamke mzima ambae kama kuna tatizo angeweza kunijulisha kwa njia nyingine na likatatulika kwa kweli siwezi kuvumilia.Maana ukichekelea leo jiandae na kesho!!

    2.Kutoka nje ya mahusiano. - sijui kama itatokea siku nikabadilisha mawazo kuhusu hili ...kwa sasa hivi naamini kama mtu ananipenda na kuniheshimu kweli hawezi kutoka nje ya mahusiano tuliyonayo.Kama kuna kinachokosekana aniambie nirekebishe.

    3.Kunidharau/tukana mbele za watu - inaonyesha haniheshimu...na kama haniheshimu siwezi kuona tukiendelea hata kufika mbali zaidi ya kua wapenzi tu maana kuheshimiana ni muhimu.

    4. Kuonyesha kutokujali hisia/mawazo yangu - mtu ambae anamwachia mwenzake kazi nzima ya kujenga mahusiano ni sawa na mzigo mzito ambao unabebeka ila baada ya muda unachosha.Kuna watu ambao wao hata kumjulia mwenzake hali hawezi...kusongesha mahusiano mbele hawezi..yani we unakua na kazi ya kumpeleka upande huu na ule bila kujua kama kweli ndo kilichopo moyoni mwake.Kama unamlazimisha vile au anafanya tu kukuridhisha uendelee kuwepo kwa muda ule ambao anaweza kutumia uwepo wako.Ubaya wa watu kama hawa ni kwamba hata siku akiamka akakwambia sikuwahi kukupenda huwezi kumbishia kwasababu hakuwahi kukwambia wala kuonyesha kwa matendo!!

    5.Ubinafsi - mtu wa mimi..mimi ..mimi.Kila kitu ni vile anavyotaka yeye au hamna kitu.Wakati mahusiano yanatakiwa yawe makubaliano na michango ya pande zote mbili.

    6.Ulalamikaji/kutokua na shukrani - hata ufanye zuri gani huwezi pata asante na mbaya zaidi utaambulia malalamiko.

    7.Kutokujiamini kulikopitiliza - maana mara nyingi hii hua inazaa tuhuma.Anakua hana imani kwamba unampenda kweli au ukienda sokoni unaenda kununua nyanya tu na kurudi.Tuhuma zikizidi zinaua hisia zilizokuwepo.
    N.k....

    Wewe je....?!
     
  2. Mkirua

    Mkirua JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Aug 9, 2011
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    Binafsi mimi siamini kwenye kuachana especially watu wakishafunga ndoa. Ni bahati mbaya sana. Naamini yoote uliyoyaorodhesha hapo juu yanazungumzika na yanarekebishika provided kuwamba binadamu anatabia ya kujifunza na kujirekebisha (though sio wote). Sasa Lizzy kama mimi ni muhusika ukazungumza na mimi na nikajirekebisha bdo utasisitiza kuachana?
     
  3. VoiceOfReason

    VoiceOfReason JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Aug 9, 2011
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    Kuacha kunipenda..., cause mtu akiwa hakupendi atakufanyia visa...
    Akufukuzae akwambii toka....

    Therefore mabadiliko yaliyopelekea mimi kumpenda yakibadilika inamaanisha niliyempenda sio niliyenae sasa
     
  4. Imany John

    Imany John Verified User

    #4
    Aug 9, 2011
    Joined: Jul 30, 2011
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    mwanamke asiyeijua dini kiukweli siwezi mvumilia.

    Atakauwa anakosa misingi fulani muhimu katika maisha yetu ya kila siku.

    Kama maandiko yanavyosema"kumcha mungu ni chanzo cha maarifa".
    Bila shaka mwanamke asiyeijua dini ndo itakuwa moja ya sababu kwa upande wangu.
     
  5. afrodenzi

    afrodenzi Platinum Member

    #5
    Aug 9, 2011
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    Ntakujibu miaka 10 kuanzia dakika hiii
    asante...
     
  6. Chauro

    Chauro JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Aug 9, 2011
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    Habari Lizzy,kupenda ni pamoja na kubeba/kuvumiliana kwenye mapungufu tuliyonayo nafikiri ni viumbe wachache ambao wanakosa kimojawapo ya ulivoandika.Ukishapenda rafiki kuna wakati hata hayo mapungufu huwa hatuyaoni.
     
  7. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Aug 9, 2011
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    Mkirua niliweka neno “baada ya muda“ nikiwa na maana kwamba mhusika hana muda wala nia ya kubadilika.
     
  8. Vin Diesel

    Vin Diesel JF Gold Member

    #8
    Aug 9, 2011
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    mie akitoka nje ndio mwisho wa kila kitu...
     
  9. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #9
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    Very true...visa vingi hua vinaashiria kwamba expiring date imefika...sema tu basi hua hatupendi kukubali kwamba mwisho umefika!
     
  10. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Aug 9, 2011
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    LX embu fafanua kidogo...asiyejua dini vipi?!Maana unaweza kuta mtu kwenye nyumba za ibada hakosi ila moyoni mwake hana Mungu yeyote...na mwingine nyumba za ibada sio muhimu kwake ila Mungu kambeba moyoni!
     
  11. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Aug 9, 2011
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    Salama mpendwa!!

    Mimi sikatai kwamba mapungufu yapo na hatuna budi kuvumiliana ila mtu unapopoteza nguvu na muda mwingi kwenye “kuvumilia“ badala ya kumfurahia mwenzako pamoja na mahusiano yenu inabidi kuwe na mabadiliko....na ikishindikana inabidi muangalie tena kama hiyo couple yenu ni sahihi au la.Mapenzi sio mateso...yanatakiwa kufurahiwa!
     
  12. Mkirua

    Mkirua JF-Expert Member

    #12
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    Ni sawa Lizzy lakini kama hujaingia kwenye mahusiano tegemea kukutana na hayo mambo at least baadhi kama sio yote.... na ujiandae kuyavumilia yale yatakayoshindikanika kurekebishwa. Mathalan nakufokea mbele za watu na sibadiliki. Are you going to dirvorse?Je utaachwa/utaacha wangapi? Kwanini nwewe kwa upande wako usijaribu kurekebisha hali ya kufokewa hovyo? Hudhani wewe ndio chanzo?Some of the things tunapaswa kuvumiliana huku tukiendelea na juhudi za kuelimishana na pia kuomba vinginevyo dunia itajaa walioacha na kuachwa tu....
     
  13. Dena Amsi

    Dena Amsi JF-Expert Member

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    6.Ulalamikaji/kutokua na shukrani - hata ufanye zuri gani huwezi pata asante na mbaya zaidi utaambulia malalamiko.


    Hii tabia inakera nakuniudhi kulikopitiliza mpaka inanikatisha tamaa kwa kweli umenisemea kila kitu aisee.

    Naongezea kidogo pia na masimango juu utayapata oohh unaringa kwasababu siku hizi una kile una hiki kwani ulitaka nisiwe nacho??
     
  14. Nyani Ngabu

    Nyani Ngabu Platinum Member

    #14
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    You are too picky.
     
  15. Baba_Enock

    Baba_Enock JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Aug 9, 2011
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    Lizzy,

    Ma-Bachela na Ma-Single huwa mnanifurahisha sana! Mambo yenu ni ya kusadikika tu!
     
  16. Tulizo

    Tulizo JF-Expert Member

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    Aug 9, 2011
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    Jambo lolote ambalo linatishia na kuhatarisha maisha yangu au maisha ya watoto....... Porojo nyingine na siasa za mapenzi siyo issue....
     
  17. M

    Marytina JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Aug 9, 2011
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    namba 3&7
    kunitukana mbele ya watu & kutokujiamijni kupita kiasi
     
  18. Imany John

    Imany John Verified User

    #18
    Aug 9, 2011
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    <br />
    <br />
    Sizungumzii muhudhuriaji wa ibada.
    Anayeijua ndo nayemzungumzia.
    Unajua akikosa maadili hayo huwa wanamatatizo sana.
    Note:sizungumzii mwanamke ambaye anatumia Dini kama mwamvuli wa kufanya machafu yake.
     
  19. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Aug 9, 2011
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    Dah...kwahiyo natakiwa nivumilie tu?!Haijalishi kama mimi nimekosea au la...kitendo cha kukaripiana mbele za watu sio kizuri kwa yeyote yule.Ikibidi kumalizana kwa muda ule mshike mtu mkono..msogeze pembeni alafu toa dukuduku lako.

    Itafika mahali hata kutembea pamoja itakua ishu...ya nini kuishi maisha ya wasiwasi?!

    Ohhh alafu narudia tena kwamba mapungufu yapo na yanakubalika ila yasiwe kero kwa mwingine.Hata mimi ntajitahidi kucheza na yangu ili nisigeuke kero...sio mtu kila siku habari ni ile ile mpaka mwenzio anaanza kunyata nyumbani (refer thread ya MMKJJ).
     
  20. M

    Marytina JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Aug 9, 2011
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    sorry kwa kudandia
    hapo red!!!!!!!!! tupe za kutokusadikika
     
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