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Ndoa yangu imeanza kuingia kirusi cha aina yake

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Pierre III, Jun 11, 2010.

  1. P

    Pierre III Member

    #1
    Jun 11, 2010
    Joined: Jun 1, 2010
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    WanaJF. Nina miezi mitano kwenye ndoa tuliyofunga kiserikali kwa sababu za kidini, kama kawaida maisha yanaendelelea vizuri bila migogoro yoyote. My wife anatabia ya kunieleza kila kitu tukiwa chumbani, yaani ni muwazi sana. Kila akikaribia siku zake anatoa tarifa, lakini mwezi ulopita aliniambia kua siku zake zimechelela isivyo kawaida yake( yaani badala ya tarehe 28 au 29 au 30 au 31 au 1). Nkamwambia labda umenasa? Alivyosikia hivyo kasema haiwezekani kupata mimba sasa hivi kabla sijapata kazi( ndo kamaliza chuo bado hajapata kazi). Ilipofika tarehe 5 akanipigia simu kua ameona siku zake, na kweli nilipofika nyumbani niliona akiweka pads. Baada ya wiki mbili nlikua sijiskii vizuri kichwa kilikua kinauma, nikachukua kibox changu cha kutunzia madawa, cha kushangaza sijakuta dawa yoyote ndo ikabidi niulize my wife zimeenda wapi? Akaniambia hajui, ila baada ya kumbana akakiri kua yeye ndo alokula hizo dawa kwani alikua anahisi maumivu makali kwenye kizazi hasa anapokua anakojoa. Nikamuuliza kulikono unaumwa lakini hukutaka nijue? Akasema aliogopa kwa sababu mimi hua namkataza kula dawa bila kushauriwa na daktari. WanaJF nina wasiwasi kua my wife katoa mimba baada ya kula zile dawa ( ila sijamwambia) je inawezekana siku za mwanamke kuchelewa kwa siku tano au sita ( 35/36 days monthly period)?
     
  2. Kimbweka

    Kimbweka JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Jun 11, 2010
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    Tunarudi kulekule..........kaa naye muulize vizuri na kwa utulivu, usionyeshe hasira kabisa ... Atakuambia tu ukweli
     
  3. Obuntu

    Obuntu JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Jun 11, 2010
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    Jibu la swali : Inawezekana kupitiliza hata siku saba : normally hii huwa inaambata na maumivu chini ya tumbo

    Hizo dawa mnazotunza kwenye "ki-box" ni dawa za aina gani mpaka upate ushauri wa daktari ndio umeze? Anti-pain nyingi uwa zina ujumbe unaosema "Maumivu yakizidi muone daktari". Maana yake usitumie anti-pain kama sehemu ya tiba bali kama una maumivu, na ambayo unahisi yametokana na "fatigue" fulani.

    Ushauri wangu ni kuwa hiyo ndoa yenu inahitaji MAOMBEZI - Miezi mitano ni muda mabao sisi tunaona kama bado mpo kwenye "fungate aka honeymoon". Lakini naona nyie mmesha anza "kubanana"!
     
  4. Lukolo

    Lukolo JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Jun 11, 2010
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    Mzee, mbona wengine huwa wanavuka hata mwezi. Inategemeana kama ana stress au kuna mabadiliko yoyote ya kimaisha. Kwa mfano mwanamke mwenye hofu kubwa ya kwamba ana mimba huwa inaweza kutokea akaconclude kabisa kwamba anayo halafu akajikuta haipo. Na hii inawatokea sana wadada ambao, ama anaogopa sana mimba au ana hamu sana ya kuwa na mimba. Sijui ni kwanini, lakini nafikiri kuna mambo ya kisaikolojia kidogo. Jaribu kumwamini mke wako ndugu yangu. Mkianza mapema hivi kutiliana shaka, hamtafika mbali.
     
  5. Ndahani

    Ndahani JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Jun 11, 2010
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    Sometimes ni vizuri kutulia na kujaribu kuelewa tatizo ulilonalo ili uweze kulitatua. Unaweza kufanya makosa makubwa kufikiri kama ametoa mimba kumbe wala haikuwa hivyo.Trust inajengwa kwa muda mrefu sana ila kuibomoa haichukui hata dakika tano!!
     
  6. Naumia

    Naumia Member

    #6
    Jun 11, 2010
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    Mbona ni kawaida kuchelewa hata siku 7- 10. Kuna wanawake wengi tarehe hazibadilikagi mwezi kila mwezi lakini hata hawa saa nyingine mambo yanaweza wahi au kuchelewa siku kibao. Pia maumivu ya tumbo ya aina hiyo ni kawaida tu

    Kwa vile umeisha weka mawazo hayo inabidi uongee nae tu vizuri. Na pia ingesaidia kukaa chini mpange when do you guys want to have a baby...inawezekana wewe uko tayari but yeye bado or vise versa.
     
  7. Kiranga

    Kiranga JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Jun 11, 2010
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    Kama hamtaki mimba tumieni njumu.
     
  8. TIMING

    TIMING JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Jun 11, 2010
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    ushauri wangu ni kwamba... kaeni mzungumze... huyo ni n'keo sema nae usione soo
     
  9. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Jun 11, 2010
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    Makubwa!
    Kutumia dawa za maumivu tu ndio uhitimishe katoa mimba?
     
  10. Pretty

    Pretty JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Jun 11, 2010
    Joined: Mar 19, 2009
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    ......... Sio kila mwanamke ana regular menstrual cycle, wengine wana irregular menstrual cycle..........inaelekea wewe umekariri tarehe ya mkeo kumbe muda mwingine huwa zinapitiliza.Usimtilie mashaka kiasi hicho mkeo hadi useme ndoa inataka kuingia kirusi.
     
  11. Liz Senior

    Liz Senior JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Jun 11, 2010
    Joined: Apr 19, 2007
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    Wajameni mi nilishtuka kweli! kwani dawa gani hizo mnaweka nyumbani ametumia kutolea Mimba! :A S-eek:...kumbe ni kutuliza maumivu baada ya kutoa! Mkuu mbona umefikiria mbali? Japo kwa kweli inatia shaka kwanini nae alidanganya hajui dawa zimeenda wapi? Au anakuogopa? Sema nae taratibuuuuuu! Vunja ukimya
     
  12. Buchanan

    Buchanan JF Diamond Member

    #12
    Jun 11, 2010
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    Kwa sasa mpe "benefit of doubt" mkeo na kumsamehe toka moyoni hata kama hajaomba msamaha! As long as mko pamoja kila kitu kitajulikana tu, inawezekana kweli katoa mimba, or may be there is sth else, usitumie nguvu nyingi kutafuta vijikosa vidogo!
     
  13. ngoshwe

    ngoshwe JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Jun 12, 2010
    Joined: Mar 31, 2009
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    Wakati mwingine ndoa tunazivuruga wenyewe. Wewe kama "Kichwa cha nyumba" kwa nini ufumbie macho jambo unalo ona halijaenda vizuri na kulituliza moyoni usimuulize mwenzio badala yake ukaenda nalo kwa jirani kumweleza?. Kwa nini usimuulize vizuri mwenzio?.Labda kitalaamu, japo hujasema zilikuwa kiasi gani, dawa za maumivu haziwezi kutoa mimba. Na kama wewe unataka ameze dawa baada ya kushauriwa na daktari, kwa nini unatunza dawa nyingi nyumbani?.

    Mtu aliyetoa mimba huwezi kumfahamu hasa ukiwa nae karibu?.
    Epuka wasiwasi na mashaka tele juu ya mwenzio, Ndoa ni kuaminiana na kuheshimiana. epuka kuishi kwa hisia zitakumaliza na kukufilisi kimwwili na kiakili, ukianza hivyo hamtadumu kwa kitambo kwani chokochoko za ndoa ni sisi wenyewe, ipo siku utataka utafikiri kutenda kitendo kibaya dhihi ya mwenzio kwa kuwa unahisi labda nae kafanya. Utaanza kumuhisi tena vibaya mwenzi kwa mambo mengine ambayo hafanyi. epuka kuishi kwa kumtegea mitego mwenzio ili akiharibu upate pointi za kumshutumu.

    Kuhusu suala la kupata mtoto ni vizuri mkaka chini kupanga, usimpachike tu mwenzio mzigo ambao kwake ataona ni kero itakayomnyima raha. Mkiwa mke na mume maana yake ni kitu kimoja, mnapanga na kuamua kwa pamoja. Kama mama ataamua kutoa mimba manaka hataki kiumbe..ukishtukia hilo ebu mtishie kuwa unatafuta mzigo mwingie wa kukuletea kiumbe ndani uone atakavyojibu kama si kukubaliana nawe mpate mtoto mapema.

    Mnapo oana si lazima kuzaa mapema lakini mkumbuke kuwa kuzaa mapema kuna manufaa zaidi kuliko kuchelewa kwani huwezi kulea watoto vizuri ukifikia uzeeni hata kama una hela vipi. Haya mahangaiko ya kusoma na kutafuta kazi ni kwa ajili ya familia, hivyo pengine mkikubalina mmoja naweza kujituma kuleta "mpunga" ndani na mwwingine abakie kulea watoto ili msije mka zaa wajukuu..
     
  14. IronBroom

    IronBroom JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Jun 12, 2010
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    Kwa reaction kama hizi ndoa itakutesa. Looks like u r in love with 'jumping into conclusions'...otherwise unyooshe maelezo:ni nini kingine ulichoona(apart from disappearance of pain killers)?Accusing your five months marriage partner of abortion si jambo dogo.Serious allegations.

    By the way,nilicho-notuce ni kwamba there has not been any serious discussion kuhusu watoto katika ndoa yenu. Wewe busy ili 'uweke kitu' ilhali mwenzio hataki na mbaya zaidi hakuna anayejua msimamo wa mwenzake kuhusu muda muafaka wa kupata mtoto(of course ni mapenzi ya Mungu kupitia sisi).

    Ushauri wangu:
    1. Amini alichokwambia.
    2. Kaeni na kujadili habari ya kupata mtoto...kama mngepewa fursa ya kuchagua lini mpate mtoto,je mngependa iwe lini?
    3. Dont take for granted and/or abuse uwazi wa mkeo.
     
  15. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Jun 12, 2010
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    Wakati mwingine ukiwa wasi wasi kupita kias unawez kunatengeneza taswira ya kitu ambacho hakipo. Jaribu kumwamini mkeo na kama huwezi basi ujue hapo kuna tatizo kubwa zaidi ya haya unayoyaongelea.

    Pia siyo vizuri kulazimisha mwenzio abebe mimba. Inabdi mkubaliane ili likitokea tatizo mlikabiri kwa pamoja. Hapo hakuna njia ya mkato zaidi ya "talk, talk,talk, talk,talk, talk,.....n"!
     
  16. n

    nndondo JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Jun 12, 2010
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    Sijui kama hiki kisa ni cha kweli ama ni kufurahisha baraza, inawezekana mto hoja ni layman kiasi hiki wa mambo ya uzazi? kweli tuna kazi tafadhali kaonane na daktari ama washauri wa mambo ya uzazi wa mpango wa aina yoyote kwa hospitali yoyote watakusaidia maana unahitaji elimu kama vile ya kuanzia shule ya chekechea kama kweli hili ni swali la msingi kwako. Next time tumia zaidi daktari wa JF kuliko general discussion forum watakusaidia zaidi
     
  17. Masikini_Jeuri

    Masikini_Jeuri JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Jun 12, 2010
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    Tumepewa wake tukae nao kwa akili!

    Kaa naye kwa akili!
     
  18. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Jun 12, 2010
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    Mhhhh
     
  19. M

    Mike 1234 JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Jun 12, 2010
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    unataka kuniambia wk mbili nzima hujamjua mkeo na mnalala naye kitanda kimoja au mko mbali mbali!
     
  20. R

    Ramos JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Jun 12, 2010
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    Uwezekano kuwa mkeo katoa mimba ni mdogo mno kwa sababu zifuatazo;-

    Kuwa alichelewa kuona cku zake kwa siku 5, sio rahisi kuwa ndani ya siku hizo angekuwa ameshaamua 'kutoa' mimba, lazima angevutavut kusubiria dalili zingine...

    kama angeamua bas kutoa mimba, ingechukua sio chini ya wiki kadhaa kabla tumbo halijakaa sawa hivyo asingeweza kuona siku zake mapema hivo

    kama angekuwa na wazo la kutoa mimba, na bila shaka bila ww kujua, then asingekuambia hajaona siku zake, angetoa kmy kym

    uwezekano kuwa siku ulomwona akiweka 'pamba' ilikuwa ndo mimba inatoka ni mdogo kwani kwa wakati huo mimba ingekuwa na takriban siku 20; damu yake sio ya kuzuia na pamba

    dawa za kupunguza maumivu (asprin, panadol/paracetamol, diclofenac) hazitoi mimba katika doz za kawaida. ili zitoe mimba zingetumiwa kwa doz ambayo hata mwenye mimba angeugua.

    inaonekana mkeo anatumia njia za kuzuia mimba, ndo maana akakwambia (na konfidens) 'siwez kupata mimba kabla sijapata kaz'


    Ushauri
    kaa na mkeo mjadiliane na mfikie muafaka juu ya suala la uzazi. yy hana mpango wa kupata mimba, ww huna mpango wa kuzuia mimba - fikieni muafaka haraka...
     
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