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Naomba ushauri wenu wana JF

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by baraka_41, Apr 19, 2011.

  1. b

    baraka_41 Member

    #1
    Apr 19, 2011
    Joined: Apr 19, 2011
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    Habari wana jamii wote,ni mara yangu ya kwanza kuingia huku kwenye forum hii
    Naomba sana mnipe ushauri wenu kwa haya nitakayoyaeleza hapa

    Mimi nimeolewa nina miaka 13 katika ndoa, nina mtoto mmoja wa kiume mwenye miaka 12, mume wangu ana mtoto wa kike mwenye miaka 10 aliezaa na mwanamke mwingine.

    tatizo langu ni kuwa miaka mitatu iliyopita niligundua kuwa nimeathirika na sasa natumia dawa za kupunguza makali(ARV)
    Nilishindwa kumweleza mume wangu kuhusu hali yangu kwa kuwa kila nilipomshauri kuhusu kupima afya alikuwa hataki akidai kuwa siku akigundua kuwa ameathirika atakufa. Ila mimi nilipogundua kuwa nimeathirika nikawa sikubali kufanya mapenzi bila kutumia kinga, ingawa wakati mwingine alikuwa analazimisha lakini sikuwa tayari.

    Hivi karibuni akanieleza kuwa amegundua kuhusu hali yangu baada ya kuona kadi yangu ya clinic, na yeye ameenda kupima na amesema yeye hajaathirika, hivyo kasema tuendelee kuishi bila watu kujua.

    Mimi nikampa option kuwa kwa kuwa yeye ni mzima basi nisimbane kama atahitaji awe na mwenza mwingine basi tunaweza kuachana na yeye akaanza maisha mapya, lakini kasema kuwa haiwezekani tuachane kwa kuwa tumeishi muda mrefu na tumesaidiana mengi.

    sasa naomba ushauri wenu je hili linawezekana? Au mna ushauri gani?

    Ahasanteni
     
  2. Rose1980

    Rose1980 JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Apr 19, 2011
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    kaa nae
    sasa utoke/muachane ili iweje?

    mmeoo ni muelewa
    ishi nae tu
     
  3. Michelle

    Michelle JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Apr 19, 2011
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    Pole sana Baraka....Mungu anakupenda....mshukuru una mume ambaye anakujali na anatamani kuishi na wewe hata katika udhaifu huo...wapo wanaokimbia au kufukuza wenza wao au kuwatenga. Nakushauri,endelea kuishi na mumeo,ina faraja na nguvu zaidi kuliko kuishi mwenyewe...kwakuwa hujaeleza kama kuna tatizo lolote anakupa kwa kuishi nae......usimuwekee hata hilo wazo la kuachana!!

    Endelea kujitunza na kujipenda.mpende mumeo pia....zaidi mtumaini Mungu....ni mwingi wa rehema na faraja!
     
  4. The Finest

    The Finest JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Apr 19, 2011
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    Dah! Kwanza pole sana, kwa kuwa mumeo bado anakupenda endelea kuishi naye kama alivyokusihi.
     
  5. Dena Amsi

    Dena Amsi JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Apr 19, 2011
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    Huyo mumeo ni muongo sana tena wa kutupwa..........................iko siku utakuja kusema hapa.................wanaume walivyo wakali eti akubali hali uliyonayo ha ha ha ha ha wewe unacheza na kusikia kwenye redio akubali eti yeye mzima sio kweli nikwambie..........................
     
  6. Esperance

    Esperance JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Apr 19, 2011
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    Pole Baraka, binafsi nachelea kusadiki kama yeye ni hajakutwa na tatizo. Naomba muambatane wote mkafanye vipimo kwa pamoja. Muendelee kuishi kwa upendo wa dhati icje kuwa anasema mzima kujifariji. MUNGU akutie nguvu.
     
  7. Msarendo

    Msarendo JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Apr 19, 2011
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    Pole sana...haina haja ya kuachana...kwani kwenye ndoa, si mlikula kiapo cha kuwa pamoja kwenye shida na raha.
     
  8. Dena Amsi

    Dena Amsi JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Apr 19, 2011
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    Umeona eehhhh ndo maana mie nikasema mwongo mkubwa huyo mwanaume hana lolote hata yeye ameshapata tatizo....................
     
  9. Michelle

    Michelle JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Apr 19, 2011
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    My dear sister, mbona wapo ninawajua wanawake wameathirika na wanaume hawajaathirika or lets say virusi havijaonekana na wanaishi??? cases kama hizi zipo....wanaume hawafanani kwenye hili....labda tu tumshauri Baraka wakapime na mumewe ahakiki hali ya mumewe lakini najua kama anampenda atampenda tu hata kwenye hali hiyo!
     
  10. K

    Kilo Member

    #10
    Apr 19, 2011
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    pole sana!!! uwekweli wa mambo ni kwamba KAMA ANAKUJALI KWA DHATI. atakuchukulia jinsi ulivyo na ni maoni yangu kuwa kama ameshaonesha nia hiyo TAFADHALI. usiachane naye, kwani unamuhitaji sana mume wako katika hali yako ya ugonjwa . atakusaidia sana katika mambo mengi wala usidhani ni katika kuliwazana tu. tafadhali usibadili msomamo na kumruhusu aanze maisha na mwingine, huko ni kumpoteza. asante
     
  11. nicreese09

    nicreese09 Member

    #11
    Apr 19, 2011
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    pole sana ndugu yangu,amini huyu mumeo anakupenda ila kwa uhakika kabisa mkachek wote itakaa poa
     
  12. Mkwaruzo

    Mkwaruzo JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Apr 19, 2011
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    Tuseme ameshaupata, inabaki pale pale kuwa hakuna haja ya kuachana kwa vile nyote mko ktk hali moja. Na ikiwa ni kweli hajaupata, basi umeshajijengea imani kubwa mno moyoni mwake kwa kumfanya na yy asiupate. Hivyo anaweza kuishi na ww bila ya tatizo lolote.
    Lakini hofu yng ni kuwa anatafuta kibali cha kutobuguziwa pale aendapo nje kwa kisingizio cha eti yeye kuwa ni mzima.
     
  13. Dena Amsi

    Dena Amsi JF-Expert Member

    #13
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    My dear naongea kwa uzoefu wa kufanya kazi na hao watu na kuishi nao ni ngumu kukubali kirahisi hivyo wapo sikatai lakini he he he unapima unakimbia majibu usifanye mchezo dada hii kitu isikie tu kwenye tv na radio inatisha na kuogopesha sana.

    Any way sibishi wala sikatai wapo hao wanaoishi positive na negative tena wengi tu lakini fatilia wengi walivyo si rahisi hivyo ma dear.................
     
  14. sweetlady

    sweetlady JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Apr 19, 2011
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    Mh! pole sn baraka, Mshukuru mungu kwa kila jambo. Kama ni kwel mumeo hajaathrka na amekubaliana na hal yko endeleen kuishi, huna haja ya kuondoka kwnye ndoa yako!
     
  15. Kaka Mpendwa

    Kaka Mpendwa JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Apr 19, 2011
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    mi binafsi nina maswali mengi kuliko ushauri,
    naomba mniwie radhi wana jamvi, pale ninapokuwa nimemu-offend mtu, na si kusudi langu.

    Umesema upo kwenye ndoa kwa miaka 13, ila kwa miaka 3 ya hivi karibuni hali yako imezidi kuzorota..
    Nilitaka kufahamu ni nani aliyekuambikiza?..Maana kama mume amesema kapima na hajaonekana nao, ninapata wasiwasi na uaminifu kwenye ndoa..

    Napenda kumpongeza mumeo kwa hatua aliyochukua, yaani badala ya kukuhukumu ameamua kusimama katika matatizo haya. pia tunashukuru kwa hizi ARV zinazosaidia..

    kwa sababu yametokea na mume ameahidi kuwa pamoja na wewe, muamini tu..maana ndiye yeye aliyepelekea mkafunga ndoa..
    Zaidi sana mtumaini Mungu ili azidi kumpa nguvu, ujasiri na hekima za kukaa na wewe. Hujafika mwisho wa maisha, una mengi sana unaweza kufanya. Hivyo basi timizeni ndoto zenu kama wanandoa kwa msaada wa Mungu
     
  16. Michelle

    Michelle JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Apr 19, 2011
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    Nimekuelewa my dear.....pengine japo hakusema ana wasiwasi na kukubali kwa mumewe kuendelea kuishi nae kwasababu ya experience kama uliyonayo.....ni ukweli kuwa ni wanaume wachache wanaokubali kuwatunza na kuwapenda zaidi wake zao wakiwa na hali hii....ila kwa wanawake ni wengi....sina hata la kusema,manake Baraka wala hatuambii kwanini ana mashaka na kukubali kwa mumewe hadi kuomba ushauri.....:sleepy:
     
  17. Freema Agyeman

    Freema Agyeman JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Apr 19, 2011
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    Rafiki wa familia mumewe aligundulika na UKIMWI. Mke alipopima mara zote ni negative. Mke anasema hawakuwahi kutumia condom na walikuwa wanakula tunda hata mumewe alipoanza kuugua maradhi ya mwanzo. Alipogundulika anao ndio wakaacha. Alimtunza mumewe kwa kipindi chote cha maradhi hadi alipofariki.

    Mke kafariki miaka ishirini baadae kwa malaria kali. Hajawahi kutumia ARVs maana wakati wote alikuwa na negative status.

    Nadhani hiki ni kitendawili ambacho mabingwa wa afya na hasa UKIMWI inabidi watueleweshe.

    Inakuwaje kwenye mahusiano ya kingono mmoja anaathirika na mwingine haathiriki. Hi ni kwa wale waaminifu kwenye mahusiano yao.
     
  18. M

    Madembwe New Member

    #18
    Apr 19, 2011
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  19. Kaka Mpendwa

    Kaka Mpendwa JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Apr 19, 2011
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    mmh..inawezekana hii?? kwa ufahamu wangu naona kama mwanaume akiathirika mwanamke pia anakuwa kwenye hatari kubwa ya kuathirika..
    Ila kwa tukio la huyu dada yetu mpendwa ni kwamba yeye ameathirika lakini mumewe hajaathirika,.. ndo nilikuwa nataka kujua kumetokea nini??
    Any way, vyanzo viko vingi, na cha msingi ni kusahau yaliyotokea na kuendelea na maisha..
     
  20. nnunu

    nnunu JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Apr 19, 2011
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    POLE SANA BARAKA,
    KAMA KWELI MUMEO ANAONGEA UKWELI KUWA HAJAATHIRIKA NI JAMBO LA HERI,
    LAKIN INGEKUWA VIZURI SANA KAMA MNGEENDA WOTE HOSP KUPIMA ILI KUHAKIKISHA KAMA KWELI ,
    HANA VVU, ISIWE ANASEMA HANA VVU KUMBE ANAVYO ILA HATAKI TU KUSEMA UKWELI...manake binadamu sisi sometimes mmh!!
    ukweli umetupitia kushoto sana.

    ILA BADO NAMPONGEZA KWA KUAMUA KUENDELEA KUISHI PAMOJA KSB NI KWELI KUWA NA VVU SIYO MWISHO WA NDOA,HUO NI UGONJWA KAMA YALIVYO MAGONJWA MENGINE.PIA NI KUDHIHIRISHA KWA VITENDO KILA KIAPO CHA NAKUPENDA NA NTAENDELEA KUKUPENDA KWA UZIMA WA AFYA NJEMA NA UGONJWA.

    NAWATAKIA MAISHA MEMA YA NDOA YENU,ILA BADO NASISITIZA NENDENI WOTE WAWILI MKONO KWA MKONO KUPIMA NA MAJIBU YENU YOTE CHUKUENI KWA PAMOJA.
     
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