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naomba mawazo yenu

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by jn, May 8, 2009.

  1. jn

    jn Member

    #1
    May 8, 2009
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    i have been in a relationship with a lovely man for 3 years. tulipofika miaka miwili na nusu nikatamani tufunge ndoa lakini mwenzangu hakuwa tayari. mapenzi yangu kwake yakapungua mno, yeye akapata mwingine lakini hakuniambia. hata mimi mwishowe nikapata mwingine lakini na mimi pia sikumwambia. yeye akaamua amuache mwenzake na kurudia penzi letu; wakati huu mimi nikawa nimeshanogewa na mpenzi wangu mpya. sikuweza kumrudia tena. tukaachana. uhusiano wangu mpya haukumudu muda mrefu (we were together 6 months or so). mpenzi wangu mpya akawa mgumu wa communication, he is moody; i am a loving and affectionate person but i realised later that although he is affectionate and loving his love is serious. he is a very serious person and i tend to take things easy sana.... i became unhappy sana. in the mean time my old love akaniomba turudiane nikakubali. baada ya miezi mitano vipi my old love proposed marriage to me and i said yes. although deep inside i knew i had some feelings for the other guy. i continued seeing the other guy. i know it was wrong to, but i just coudnt help it. sasa hivi, nimeshidwa kuendelea na uchumba as i think its unfair to continue with the marriage arrangements when i feel like i love this other person. i do love my fiance but... sijui ni nini kinanifanya nisite. last week i broke up my engagement because i just couldnot go on with the stress of loving two men. needless to say i have broken someone's heart so badly. his family (who used to love me) now dont even want to hear my name mentioned. all this time i have been on/off with the 'new' guy. sometimes i see a future in us and we are becoming closer, lakini kuna wakati mwingine anafanya mambo ya ajabu sana. mpaka naanza kujiuliza "ivi kweli huyu mtu ananipenda?" hakuniambia nivunje uchumba wangu lakini niliamua kumwambia kwamba sasa hivi niko single ili asithani bado niko na mpenzi wangu wa zamani. nilimwambia (kuhusu breaking my engagement) wiki iliyopita lakini mpaka sasa naona yuko kimya tu. anasema he was not "listening to me" when i was telling him about breaking up my engagement (sijui anatania?). tangu nimwambie haya mambo, naona kama tabia yake imebadilika kidogo. na sasa naona kama nitakua nimekosea kuachana na mchumba wangu. is it too soon to say this? natamani sana kumrudia mchumba wangu. lakini hata sijui nianzie wapi.

    wana JamiiForum wenzangu... mimi nina matatizo gani? nimrudie mpenzi wangu sasa hivi au ningoje kidogo hasira yake kwangu ipungue? na huyu jamaa mwingine, nikae kimya mpaka yeye aje kwangu? au nimwambie what is his plan na mimi? au mimi i am not fit to be with anyone?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: May 9, 2009
  2. J

    Joyceline JF-Expert Member

    #2
    May 8, 2009
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    Pole sana mpedwa, najua magumu unayopitia kwa sasa, lakini kabla ya kumuacha huyo mchumba wako ungejaribu kuangalia huyo mwanaume mwingine ana mpamgo gani na wewe.
    sasa unatakiwa uchukue hatua kabla huyo mtu wako hajapata mwingine kama bado unampenda na unaona ni right person kwako, mtafute mtu wake wa karibu akakuombee msamaha kabla hujamface maana ukimfuata hivi hivi na ulimhurt haitawezekana.
    pole sana nakutakia kila la kheri
     
  3. Abdulhalim

    Abdulhalim JF-Expert Member

    #3
    May 8, 2009
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    Eeh wanawake bwana ..Kaaazi kwelikweli..
     
  4. R

    REOLASTON Member

    #4
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: Feb 24, 2009
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    Kwanza tulia wewe mwenyewe halafu ujiulize unampenda yupi kati ya hao. tatizo hapo umewachanganya ndio maana huyo wa sasa hakupi jibu lenye msimamo. Na kingine shost mwombe mungu yeye ndio mweza yote. Atakupa the right person
     
  5. Akili Unazo!

    Akili Unazo! JF-Expert Member

    #5
    May 8, 2009
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    Jn unaonekana hujatulia yaani kicheche.
     
  6. Msanii

    Msanii JF-Expert Member

    #6
    May 8, 2009
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    JN
    unahitaji ushauri nasaha kwa wanasaikolojia uli uweze kujitambua na kujua namna ya kupanga mwelekeo wako.
    ukinihitaji ntakusaidia
     
  7. jn

    jn Member

    #7
    May 8, 2009
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    yeah.. maybe your right. although i doubt it. im just confused.
     
  8. jn

    jn Member

    #8
    May 8, 2009
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    utanisaidiaje? nakusikiliza.
     
  9. Next Level

    Next Level JF-Expert Member

    #9
    May 8, 2009
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    Duh...kumbe mko wengi...eeeh! na mwenzio alinifanyia hivyo.....kaachane naye.....later kaja anahema kweli....nilitamani nimaccomodate but couldn't coz nishaenda kwenye ''back up'' na mbaya zaidi nsha zaa naye! Till leo ana lia lia tu....wakati ndiye alinimwaga.......!

    So bibie get someone very close kwa huyo mshkaji ampe somo haraka sana kabla hajaharibu...kule kny back up yake, then mkutane umwombe samahani.....akikubali......ujitahidi sana kny uhusiano wenu utulie coz ukichemsha tu atakumbuka wht you did before!

    BWT......Na nyie lakini mnazidi....kha, why can't you forecast this?
     
  10. Next Level

    Next Level JF-Expert Member

    #10
    May 8, 2009
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  11. The Farmer

    The Farmer JF-Expert Member

    #11
    May 8, 2009
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    Hapo jn naona kuna tatizo kidogo, labda kabla ya kuanza kuli-solve nikuulize swali. Ni kwa nini uliamua kutafuta mpenzi mwingine baada ya kugundua kuwa mpenzi wako ana uhusiano na mtu mwingine?
     
  12. Outlier

    Outlier JF-Expert Member

    #12
    May 8, 2009
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    aisee wee mtoto uko kwenye hatari kweli kweli; bora umeomba ushauri.
    1. moja umeshakoroga kichizi!
    2. a) kati ya hao jamaa wawili, hakuna hata mmoja aweza kukuoa, unless wawe abnormal
    2. b) kama akikuoa mmojawapo ndoa haiwezi kudumu, unless wawe abnormal!
    3. usipoangalia utapata "ngoma" kama bado hujapata; kumbuka hapo mna network ya at least watu wanne! could be many more!

    ushauri
    1. pima ngoma
    2. tulia ujifikirie unataka nini maishani na kwa mwanaume
    3. pata mshkaji mwingine, preferably asiyejua 'skendo' hilo, kwani ni skendo tayari!

    Kila la kheir.
    4.
     
  13. Abdulhalim

    Abdulhalim JF-Expert Member

    #13
    May 8, 2009
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    Mimi sina msaada kwa kweli ktk hili ila actually wewe ndiye uliyenisaidia mimi na sasa nazidi kujifunza kuwa dunia duara na pia ni tambara bovu..Hapa umeniamsha hata miye niliyelala..lol
     
  14. Abdulhalim

    Abdulhalim JF-Expert Member

    #14
    May 8, 2009
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    Ah..baba naona unachukua nafasi ya Yo Yo..lol
     
  15. Nyamayao

    Nyamayao JF-Expert Member

    #15
    May 8, 2009
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    du! kweli mapenzi upofu! naomba nikuulize mrembo, kwani ulivyokuwa na huyu wa pili alikuwa anajua tayari una mchumba na yeye akaendelea na wewe tu? na ni kwanini ulimwambia huyu mchumba mpya mapema hivyo kwamba umevunja uchumba? huyu msahau ana ku enjoy tu, hana jipya mami, hana la kukwambia kuanzia ulipomueleza umevunja uchumba coz hana nia na wewe, kwa huyo mwingine cjui utarudije jamani, haaa kaa chini fikiria mara mbili jinsi ya kumrudia mana umeonyesha sio mwaminifu mpaka kwenye familia yake, pole sana kwa yote mrembo!
     
  16. Who Cares?

    Who Cares? JF-Expert Member

    #16
    May 8, 2009
    Joined: Jul 11, 2008
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    mnhhh...wewe jn...mie naona tatizo lako unakijitabia cha umalaya...hujatulia..ndani ya 6month to uvunje uhusiano na mshkaji wa kwanza tena bila sababu ukakamata wa pili ndani ya 5month unarudi kwa wakwanza na mnatangaza ndoa....wewe hujatulia.....

    kwa ukubwa wa hiyo ishu..huyu mshkaji uliyenaye anapiga hewsabu za kukumwagilia mbali ndo maana hajakujibu kitu kuhusu ulivyovunja maandalizi ya harusi na basha wako wa kwanza...ndiooo...kwanini tukufiche ukweli...huyu jamaa anakumwaga maana anahisi hata kesho yeye akitangaza ndoa utavunja uchumba pia...mbona kwa jamaa wa kwanza uliweza..na kwake anajua utaweza tuu....

    cha kufanya...nakushauri pita pita mitaa ya machangudoa na malaya wa usiku (kona bar sinza, kinondoni, ohio, sewa bar buguruni na uwanja wa fisi manzese) ndio utajua thamani ya mwanaume kukutamkia kuwa ..will u marry me please??....wenzako wanauza nyama usiku kucha wewe unamzingua mshkaji...imekula kwako

    tiba yako hasa ni kujitahidi kuwa na bwana moja kwa min ya kipindi cha miaka mi3 kama therapy ya pepo wako wa umalaya...ukishamudu hilo then utaweza kuolewa sasa.....na usikosee katika maisha yako ukarudi kwa yule mshkaji uliyemwaga wiki kadhaa kabla ya harusi..anaweza kukufanya kitu mbaya sana au kama ukianzia kwa MSISI ili mshkaji awe mjingamjinga poa...ila ujuwe hata wakwe na nduguze hawatakuelewa milele....

    pole sana kwa kulikoroga...there is no turning back in broken or seriously confussed relations.....ni maoni yangu tu (ONYO; Matumizi ya maoni yangu pasipokuwa na ridhaa yangu ni uvunjaji wa sheria za hakimiliki za jamuhuri ya muungano wa tanganyika)
     
  17. Saikosisi

    Saikosisi JF-Expert Member

    #17
    May 8, 2009
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    kuna mwanamuziki mmoja nimemsahau tena nahisi ni zilipendwa hapa hapa jf kaitoa hiyo!
    wimbo REHANI!
    anakupenda ukiwa na mumeo ama mchumba wako, ukiachika tu hana deal na wewe!
    kama jamaa wanavyosema, 99% imekula kwako - vijana wa mjini wanasema "ikirudi pancha"
    pole sana! ila punguza munkari - pata mwanamme mmoja, olewa kisha endeleza libeneke taratibu sio kwa fujo kama hivi.
     
  18. Mfamaji

    Mfamaji JF-Expert Member

    #18
    May 8, 2009
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    Inawezeka kweli wewe hujatulia au hujui roho yako inapenda nini. Au may be una tamaa , or speculation za maisha ya baadae kwamba ni yupi kati yao atakuwa successful kimasha .I mean ndururu, pesa... au unapenda sana **bo* otherwise umepata bahati ya kuwa na wanaume wawili. Kwa wakati mmoja .

    To be frank hamna kati yao atakayekuoa. Hata ikitokea bahati mmoja wao akakuonea huruma basi huyo mwingine utaendelea kumpa tu maana wewe ndivyo ulivyo. Mwisho wa siku ndoa itasamabaratika.
    Ushauri
    Jichunguze afya yako ya mwili, akili sex na attitude yako towards maariage . Unexpect nini kwenye ndoa ukiachia mbali ubaba na umama? Is money ,wealth and material things occupying your mind now in advance or is the relationship first?

    Second , stop dreming about these two gentlemen and look for a new one. May be utagundua in the end how difficult it is to fish a man for marriage . Wanaume ni wachache sana , wewe umchezea wawili wakati wenzio hawana hata nusu. Na hata ukibahatika kumpata mmoja kama hutabadilika kifikra kama nilivyokueleza hapo juu utakuwa na wanume wengi sana, maana kama uchumba tu wawili na ukiolewa je? You know what I mean? Halafu usiogope kwa sasa kwa kuwa mmeachana . Ogopa isije ikawa mmeabukizana virus maana nina uhakika mlikuwa mnafanya nyama kwa nyama. Na hapo ndipo itakuwa kulia na kusaga meno. Sikukatishi taama ya maisha ila ukweli hubaki ukweli. Zingatia kupima afya kabla hujambamba wa tatu.

    VIJARUBA BANA?
     
  19. Mfamaji

    Mfamaji JF-Expert Member

    #19
    May 8, 2009
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    Mkuu naona ushauri wako unafanana kabisa na wa kwangu. Sijui imekuwaje lakini inawezekana wote tunafikiri sawa sawa (parallel brightly) or wote ni jugs
    teh teh
     
  20. Shishi

    Shishi JF-Expert Member

    #20
    May 8, 2009
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    duh dada Jn, sijui nikushauri vipi... naona utaja kosa yote...tamaa ya fisi hiyo. we nawe ukambilia kumwambia wa pili kuwa umevunja uchumba....ndio maana amenyamaza tu hasemi kitu, yaani anakushangaa sana...anashindwa mwanamke huyu sampuli gani.... uloomvunjia uchumba sijui utamtumia malaika kwanza ama vipi...kila la kheri
     
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