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Najuta nimezaa nje ya ndoa, ushauri wako muhimu sana

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Paul S.S, Aug 14, 2012.

  1. P

    Paul S.S Verified User

    #1
    Aug 14, 2012
    Joined: Aug 27, 2009
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    Wadau wakati mwingine katika maisha tunafanya mambo ambayo ukikaa utulie unajiona mpumbavu na kutoamini kama kweli ni wewe umefanya au ulirukwa na akili.

    Mkasa ulio nikuta ni matokeo ya uzembe wangu ambao naujutia hakuna mfano, so naomba ushauri wako badala ya kuendelea kunihukumu kwani tayari nimejifunza

    Mwaka juzi tulienda kwenye shughuli fulani mkoani kwetu kwa wiki mbili, na katika katiza katiza za hapa na pale nikapata kabinti kamoja nikaanza nako uhusiano huku nikiwa na mke wangu na watoto wawili ambao niliwaacha Dar,
    Kibaya zaidi mazingira tuliyokuwepo kondom zikawa hakuna na nikafanya kosa la mwaka kwa kujamiiana naye bila kinga.

    Baada ya shughuli kwisha nikarudi Dar na kuendelea na maisha na nikawa sina tena mawasiliano na yule binti kwani alikuwa hana simu,hata hivyo ilikuwa ni kama hit and run

    Sasa mwezi machi nikaenda likizo mkoa na familia, tukiwa katika wiki ya mwisho kama bahati nikakutana na yule binti akiwa na rafiki yake wote wamebeba watoto, basi yule binti kuniona tu alishtuka na kupiga kelele almanusura anguke na kuzirai, akaja akanikumbatia na kunishikilia kwanguvu huku akilia na kuongea maneno yaliyonichangaya kabisa.

    Ikabidi tutafute sehemu tukae atulie kisha akamtoa mtoto mgongoni na yule wa rafiki yake akasema wanao hawa wako mapacha.
    Kiukweli nilipo waona tu roho ilipasuka maana kitu fotokopi,huitaji hata mtaalamu kubaini kama wale watoto ni wangu kwani tumefanana nao mno.

    Baada ya maongezi marefu nikajiridhisha kuwa watoto kweli ni wangu kwa mujibu wa maelezo yake na mfanano wa watoto.
    Na akanieleza jinsi alivyohangaika kunitafuta kwani hakuwa hata anajua ninapokaa nikiwa mkoa na jina nilimpa la uongo hivyo na watoto kawapa jina hilo kama ubini wao.

    Ilibidi nimpatie pesa ya matumizi kwanza palepale na nikachukua tax na kuwapeleka kwao kwa ahadi kuwa nikapajue kwao kisha kesho yake ntakwenda na wazee kujitambulisha kama mimi ni baba wa watoto wale,akanipa namba zake za simu alikuwa nayo nikazuga nita mbeep nkiweka vocha kisha nikaondoka bila kushuka na kusalimia kwao na nikamwambia asiseme kitu kwanza nijipange kwani anaishi na wazazi wake.

    Niliporudi home nikajiuliza usiku kucha sikupata majibu,
    Nampenda mke wangu na ananiamini sana kila nikifikiaria akijua akili haikubali, nahisi nitaharibu familia yangu
    Baada ya tafakuri ya muda mrefu nikafanya maamuzi ambayo nayo naona yanaanza kunishinda ndio maana nipo hapa kwa ushauri wenu.

    Nilichoamua ni kuhakikisha natunza siri hii peke yangu, nikaamua kesho yake nikanunua line mpya ya simu na kuisajili jina lile feki nikampigia simu kuwa nimepata dharura nimeondoka alfajiri na nikamtumia pesa laki3 kwaajili ya matumizi na kuahidi nitarudi soon.
    Baada ya hapo nikamaliza wiki yangu mkoa nikiwa nashinda home tu hadi nilipoondoka na familia kurudi Dar.

    Huu ni mwezi wa 6 sasa ninachofanya ni kila mwezi natuma laki moja ya matumizi kwa ile line na kama anataka kunitaarifu kitu labda watoto wanaumwa basi atatuma meseji na mimi kila siku jioni huwa naweka line ile kwa muda mchache na kuangalia kama kuna ujumbe au nataka kujua jambo then naitoa.

    Nafanya haya yote kujaribu kuprotect familia yangu lakini pia kuhakikisha watoto wale wanapata huduma kama watoto wengine.

    Siku za karibuni presure toka kwa wazazi wa yule binti imekuwa kubwa, wanataka kunijua na kubeba jukumu kama baba kweli na si kutuma tu pesa wakati hawamjui mzazi mwenza wa binti yao, wamejaribu sana kuni trace bila mafanikio maana kila nikiwasha ile line jioni nakutana na sms kali kali kuto kwa wazazi wake, wanaongea maneno makali hadi kufikia kunitisha.

    Hakuna ndugu yangu anajua maana niliogopa angeweza kusababisha mimi kujulikana kitu ambacho sipo tayari kitokee kwani mke wangu akijua nahofu ya kupoteza furaha ya familia yangu

    Lakini pia wakati mwingine nawafikiria wale watoto wanahitaji baba anayeoneka hata kama sita ishi nao .
    Pia najiuliza ni kwa muda gani nitaweza kukaa na jambo hili peke yangu huku likinipa hofu na kuniondolea furaha ambayo ndio naogopa kuipoteza kwenye familia yangu

    Wakuu naombeni mawazo yenu tafadhali, kama ni kosa limeisha fanyika lakini I feel like I can't hold it anymore, but when I think about my family I got stuck
     
  2. Zipuwawa

    Zipuwawa JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Aug 14, 2012
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    Wakati unafanya uzinzi ulituomba ushauri nenda kamuombe mke wako atakusaidia kwa hili
     
  3. Heart

    Heart JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Aug 14, 2012
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    mmmh...kwakuwa bado ni wadogo,funguka na mtaarifu mkeo ukweli... Atachukia mara ya kwanza,kama ana moyo wa imani eventually ataelewa kama watoto hawana hatia.. Mtaarifu mkeo kaka.
     
  4. Freema Agyeman

    Freema Agyeman JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Aug 14, 2012
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    Pole. Ukweli utakuweka huru.
     
  5. P

    Paul S.S Verified User

    #5
    Aug 14, 2012
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    thanx a lot mr perfect
     
  6. Root

    Root JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Aug 14, 2012
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    kweli huu mtihani mgumu sana chakufanya watunze hao watoto huko huko walipo na usiruhusu huyo mdada afahamu unapoishi kwani atakuharibia
    pili jua kuwa ipo siku lazima mkeo atajua ukweli
     
  7. nyumba kubwa

    nyumba kubwa JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Aug 14, 2012
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    Mungu aepushie mbali. Najaribu kupiga picha camera imegoma kabisa. Subiri wenye watoto wa nje wanaweza kuwa washauri wazuri. Maana kuijua ngoma mpaka uingie ucheze. Pole sana.
     
  8. Maganga Mkweli

    Maganga Mkweli JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Aug 14, 2012
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    daah kwanza pole sana mkuu ila hili limenifurahisha sana hapo kwenye red
    mi sidhani kama hii itaendelea kuwa siri hao ni wanao na kama umeona uko tayari kuwalea na kuwatunza bora kufanya hivyo na binti wa watu aendelee na maisha yake hapo hamna namna uwezi ficha hii siri kamanda .. mueleze mkeo ukweli jipange kukutana na wazee wa binti ubebe wanao. ni hayo tu.
     
  9. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Aug 14, 2012
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    i love sukuma men, they stand for their kids no matter what.

    Ndoa ya kusambaratishwa kwa sababu ya watoto jua haikuwepo toka mwanzo.
     
  10. Mzee wa Rula

    Mzee wa Rula JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Aug 14, 2012
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    Kaka pole sana lakini ukweli ni huu, anza taratibu kumtania mkeo endapo utazaa nje ya ndoa atafanyaje????? Anza kuliingiza jambo hilo taratibu kwenye akili ya mkeo huku ukiangalia repacation yake na mwishoe unajilipua unamueleza ukweli juu ya mkasa mzima.

    Ukimaliza unarudi kijijini unawa brief wazee wa binti na kukubali kulea familia yako japokuwa mwanzo ni mgumu.

    Pole, na anza sasa hujachelewa.
     
  11. jouneGwalu

    jouneGwalu JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Aug 14, 2012
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    We ni mtu mwema... Mwanaume wa majukumu......

    Kama kijijini kule yupo Baba au mzee yeyote unayemuheshimu sana na mwenye koromelo ni vizuri umshirikishe akusaidie kutuliza mawimbi kule bush wakati pia unaandaa mazingira ya kumuingia mke mkubwa huku mjini.

    Hamna jinsi hapo, ni vizuri Wife ajue mapema tu haya mambo ya kuficha akijua wakati watoto ni wakubwa inamfanya mwanamke akate tamaa sana kwamba kumbe siku zote uliishi naye ukiwa na siri kubwa hivyo, anaweza asikuamini tena
     
  12. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Aug 14, 2012
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    mpaka dakika hii natafuta kinachokuchanganya sikioni kwa kweli.

    Sioni kwa nini hujasema kwa mkeo, kwani akikasirika kwa mwezi atakufa?? Au ana magonjwa ya moyo??

    Je ungerudi na VVU usingesema ili mnywe dawa wote???

    Kwa nini mnapenda kuwafanya watoto victims wa mambo yenu?? Na ungejua mapema si ajabu ungesema atoe mimba???

    nimegundua wanamme wanzidi kupotea katika kizazi hiki.
     
  13. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Aug 14, 2012
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    mara nyingi sana
    binadamu tunakuwa na kawaida ya kuona 'matatizo' yetu kama makuubwa sana

    kumbe wapi....


    ni madogo mno.......ukiyakubali na kuyachukulia kuwa ni madogo

    Ongea na mkeo taratiibu
    nenda nae kwa step......

    1. hatua ya kwanza mwambie kuwa ulitoka nje.....na uombe msamaha

    2.hatua ya pili jifanye huna uhakika kuwa huyo binti alizaa watoto wako au la
    unataka ku find out

    3.hatua ya tatu....unamwambia intention yako ya 'kulea watoto kama ukithiitisha ni wako'
     
  14. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Aug 14, 2012
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    wasukuma?
    huyu jamaa ni msukuma?
     
  15. s.fm

    s.fm JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Aug 14, 2012
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    Pole sana...halafu hongera sana kwa kugundua kuwa una watoto wengine, damu yako hiyo mkuu! nafikiri utakua unamfahamu vizuri mkeo, kama ni muelewa tafuta muda mzuri umueleze tu, atakasirika but ataelewa!
    Lakini kama ni mtata kodogo mmmh...tulia vuta muda na tengeneza mazingira mazuri ya kumueleza ukweli!
     
  16. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Aug 14, 2012
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    kuna tetesi ni mnyamwezi, ni kweli?

     
  17. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Aug 14, 2012
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    we ulijuaje yote hayo?
     
  18. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Aug 14, 2012
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    ndo maana nimesema ni tetesi

    tetesi huwa zipo tu, hazina umejuaje?

     
  19. Blessed

    Blessed JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Aug 14, 2012
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    Binadamu wote tumepungukiwa na utukufu wa aliye juu!so kama ni kosa ndo hivyo lmeshafanyka hatuwez kusaidiana kwa kujilaumu,just pray sana kwa dini yako yoyote b4 hujamwambia wyf wako as lazima umwambie sababu atajua tu siku moja so ni bora alsikie hili kutoka kwako!all the best,tunasubir feedback!
     
  20. BADILI TABIA

    BADILI TABIA JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Aug 14, 2012
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    Utaficha mpaka lini? Au hadi watoto waoane? Je unadhani ni vyema watoto kutumia ubini feki?
    Ukweli utakuweka huru......
     
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